With My Last Breath
My eyes popped open and I gasped.
‚What was that?' I breathed. ‚Why?'
‚There are many things that you do not know,' the man replied. ‚Many things that were prophesied long ago and whispered down, generation from generation, but never written.'
‚But why?' I asked, staring into his black eyes.
‚Because that is the way it has been,' he said cryptically before he shrugged. ‚But you are here now. And now it will begin.'
‚What will begin?' I asked hesitantly. I watched Hecate and Lucan step forward so that they could hear his answer.
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‚Everything,' he answered simply. ‚We would like our souls back. You have them.
This once was my kingdom and it has fallen into evil, evil that it was not meant for.
That troubles me. That troubles many of us here. We gave our lives, not for evil but for the good of our kingdom. Restore our souls and we will help you prevail.'
‚How?' I narrowed my eyes. ‚How can you help me?'
‚Unlock our souls,' he replied. ‚Set us free from our bondage in the underworld and we will ride together as an army to set this right. We will bring with us monsters from hell, beasts that we command. We can conquer the Fates here and set everything right.'
He could sense my uncertainty. He moved closer, bending to add one more thing.
‚Your husband,' he began. ‚Can be saved if you trust me.' His black eyes stared into mine, fierce and glistening and I swallowed hard.
I would do anything to save Cadmus. Anything. And that included trusting an army of undead warriors. But as I wavered, I also grew suspicious. If I unleashed beasts from hell, I had a feeling that they wouldn’t want to return when the battle here was over. Who in their right mind would?
‚And then what will you do?' I narrowed my eyes. ‚When this is over, what will you do?'
‚Then we will rest,' he answered simply. ‚Finally.'
‚Have your souls been at unrest this entire time?' I asked incredulously. He nodded.
‚The Fates enjoy tampering with us,' he replied angrily. ‚It pleases them. Please…
allow us our revenge. It is said that you are the one.'
Around me, the ghostly men began whispering, growing louder until their voices blended into a loud murmur, buzzing around me and echoing against the stones. I couldn’t understand their words, but their chant was mesmerizing. I nodded.
‚Yes,' I finally said. ‚I will help you. And you will help me.'
‚Yes,' he agreed.
He reached a cold hand down and grasped mine, helping me to stand. I motioned for Hecate and she quickly brought me my knapsack. I withdrew the black box of murderous souls from within it, holding it in my hands.
I studied it. There was a latch, but it was sealed closed. I had never considered that before, because knowing what it contained, I had never desired to open it. But now that I had a need, I could not see a way. I grew frustrated as I turned it over in my hands, searching every inch.
‚You are the key,' the ghostly chieftain told me quietly. ‚Your blood is the key.'
My blood turned to ice in my veins as I stared at him.
‚My blood? You mean, I must drip my blood onto it in order to open it?' I was confused.
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But as I watched him, I felt icy fingers clench my stomach and I knew that wasn’t the answer even before he shook his large head.
‚No,' he answered solemnly. ‚Your blood must spill. In order to open it, you must die.'
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Chapter Seventeen
Hecate and Lucan gasped in unison as I clutched my hands to my stomach, unconsciously shielding my unborn baby.
‚Die?' I breathed. ‚I must die?'
The chieftain nodded calmly. ‚You know that you cannot truly die but by Zeus’
sword. But your mortal body here must die in order to unlock the trapped souls. You yourself will become displaced, just as we are now. Just as Cadmus is now,' he added.
‚And you must trust us to bring you to victory, because your victory here will give you back your life. Your immortal life.'
‚That is quite a lot of trust,' I observed, trying to still my racing heart. ‚And I do not know if I possess that much. I have an unborn child to think of now. And I know that if I die here, my soul will be in flux and I will forever be in eternal sleep, until the time when someone saves me.'
‚You will save yourself,' he told me quietly. ‚Your unborn child is a part of you.
When you are saved, so shall it be. Trust your instincts, Harmonia. You are the one.'
‚I wish that everyone would stop saying that,' I replied angrily. ‚I am nothing but the child of gods. I am…'
‚You are meant to take charge of your own destiny,' he interrupted firmly. ‚So do it. Stand up and grab it with both of your hands. This is the only way.'
‚Don’t!' Lucan cried from the edge of the circle, attempting to push through to get to me. ‚Heleyne, do not do it. There is no way to ensure that we will win. And if we do not, you will never be saved. Your soul will be lost.'
But as I looked at him, at the way he was protective of me even now when he didn’t know who I was to him, I knew that as long as he was dead to me, I was dead already.
It sealed my decision.
‚Yes,' I murmured numbly. ‚I will do it.'
I looked around the circle. ‚Who will do it?' I asked. ‚Who will kill me?'
Lucan was already shaking his head adamantly, intent on preventing it. Hecate stood beside him, her mouth pressed firmly shut, turning white at the corners. Her eyes were startled and she shook her head.
‚Hecate, what is it?'
She shook her head slowly again, backing away from me. ‚I’m sorry, Harmonia. I didn’t see it… I didn’t know…'
But she knew now. Something that was troubling her so much that her eyes were full of pain and her hands were shaking. My body turned cold from fear and I took a step toward her.
‚What?' I cried anxiously. ‚What is it that you didn’t know?'
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‚It has to be her,' she whispered. ‚She must be the one to do it or it will not work.
She…'
I was panicked as I tried to make sense of what she was saying. Fear turned me immobile, however, and felt as though I couldn’t move.
‚Who is she?' I asked hesitantly. ‚My mother?' It would kill my mother if she had to be the one. I wasn’t sure that she could do it, which would mean that everyone would perish.
But Hecate shook her head quickly once more, her face a picture of dread.
‚No,' she answered limply. ‚It must be your daughter.'
‚My daughter?' I asked in confusion. ‚That makes no sense, witch. I don’t have a daughter.'
And then the vision that I had just seen came back to me, the small hand plunging the sword into my chest and Raquel’s frightened eyes meeting my own as she wept.
I froze, unable to catch a breath as my lungs spasmed uncontrollably and I gasped, trying to draw in air. I felt like a fish out of water as I choked to breathe. And then, just as always when I was overwhelmed, my legs gave out and I tumbled to the ground. I lay there for a moment as Lucan and Hecate rushed to my side. I concentrated on breathing, on trying to absorb what I had just been told.
Visions of Raquel in the Spiritlands and in the courtyard here, assailed me. Her little heart-shaped face and her innocent eyes, her dirty smudged cheeks.
‚I don’t understand,' I whispered. ‚How can this be? How did I not know?' My hand moved to cup my stomach, where a baby even now grew.
‚She is your daughter,' Hecate assured me. ‚It has been hidden from you. I only just now saw it myself. The magic of this place revealed it to me. The
Fates kept it carefully concealed.' She gestured at the stones around us. ‚There is powerful magic here.'
‚But how?...' My hand dropped limply to the ground and I felt weak. ‚What of the child I am carrying now?' Hecate nodded sadly.
‚The child you are carrying now is Raquel,' she answered simply. ‚For the Fates’
own amusement, they allowed you to become pregnant here in Camelot. When the baby was born, they took it. They allowed her to stay in the palace on Olympus until she grew into a little girl, and then they sent her to Calypso’s island, where as you know, time stills. She has remained a child ever since.'
‚I’m actually pregnant here?' I couldn’t wrap my mind around it. ‚I thought… my mother thought… that I brought the pregnancy with me.'
‚No,' Hecate shook her head. ‚No. You were pregnant here. You gave birth to the baby before you died in this life and then the Fates took your child while you continued your other cycles as a Keeper.'
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I shook my head, unable to believe it. ‚I’ve had a child all these years and didn’t know…'
‚To make matters worse,' she continued, ‚The Fates have taunted you with it and you never even knew. They kept her as a child so that they could allow you to come into contact with her in almost every life in some way, only you never knew who she was. It pleased them.'
I felt sick. I had missed my daughter’s childhood. And while that sickened me to no end, my current predicament came rushing back.
‚My daughter must kill me?' my words were like ice, each one frozen on my lips.
Hecate nodded, unable to meet my gaze.
‚I cannot do that,' I murmured. ‚To make a child do that… it’s just…'
The chieftain stepped forward, his ghostly face glowing beneath the gray clouds.
‚You must,' he insisted. ‚It is deplorable, yes. But how many times in history has someone great been forced to do the unthinkable? Many, many times… all for the greater good. You are the chosen one. You must do what others would not do. That is why you were chosen. Do this,' he implored. ‚Do this and allow us to save you. And in doing so, you will save everyone, including your husband and daughter. Don’t do it, and everyone will perish.'
I wanted to cry. I wanted to rail and scream and bemoan the Fates. But that would not help anything. And every second that I stood here was one more second that they were still in control.
I finally nodded woodenly, my hands clenched into fists at my sides.
‚Fine.'
Hecate studied my face. ‚You are certain?'
‚Yes,' I whispered. ‚Get her. The king won’t notice her absence. They think she is simply an orphaned peasant. Slip in and out and bring her here. But you must tell her what she has to do. I cannot do that.'
She nodded and was gone.
I turned to Lucan. ‚Good knight, I know that this must be perplexing for you. I wish that we had time to explain everything but we do not. Just know that you are a very good man. You have been unfairly persecuted and we will make it right.'
He grasped my hand, his grip warm and strong as he stared into my eyes. His gentle brown eyes melted my heart and I fought the urge to cry.
‚Are you certain that you want to do this?' he asked. ‚You will risk so much, my lady.'
I looked at him, at his handsome face, and I knew that I would do it a hundred times if need be.
‚Yes,' I replied firmly. ‚It is worth it.'
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Before he could answer, Hecate reappeared with Raquel at her side. Dropping Lucan’s hand, I rushed to my daughter. I knew that Hecate wouldn’t have told her that I was her mother. That would be cruel given the act that she had to perform. But I could see on her little face that Hecate had told her what she must do. I knelt in front of her, grasping her small hand.
‚Do not be afraid,' I told her quietly. ‚You have an important job. We are at war now, and we are all fighting for our lives. You are very important and I appreciate what you will do.'
‚But my lady,' she stammered. ‚Why must you die? You are so kind.'
She was frightened, her hand turning clammy and cold. With goddess hearing, I could hear her little heart racing in her chest and it broke my own.
‚There is much you do not yet know, young one,' I replied. ‚And soon, it will be revealed to you. But now, we all must be brave and strong and do what we must. Can you?'
She watched me for a moment, her eyes frightened before she nodded.
‚Yes, my lady,' she whispered. ‚I will do anything you wish.'
A knot formed in my throat and I could barely swallow it. Raquel had gotten her bravery from her father. She was terrified, but she was able to overcome it. She squared her skinny shoulders as I led her to the altar. A sword had appeared on the stone, its blade simple, long and razor sharp. I eyed it calmly. Why wasn’t I afraid?
I gathered Raquel’s hands in my own, kneeling as I looked into her eyes.
‚Do not be afraid,' I implored her. ‚I will not really die. I will still be here, just as these men are,' and I gestured toward the ghostly warriors surrounding us. ‚And then, when our battle here has been won, there is much to be explained to you.'
As I watched, her blue eyes flickered, replaced for an instant by vivid jade, just like my own. I startled and before I could even comprehend what I had seen, they had changed back to blue.
Realization settled upon me. The Fates had altered her appearance, making sure she was disguised during all of these millennia. I would have recognized her eyes. My anger fueled me and I climbed onto the stone, lying back onto the cold surface.
‚It is time,' I told Raquel. ‚Don’t be afraid. Just pick up the sword and let us get this done.'
I watched as her little hands grasped the handle of the sword and she tentatively approached me. She was terrified.
‚It will be alright,' I assured her. ‚I promise.'
She nodded and raised the sword directly over my chest. I could practically see her heart beating in hers, it was pounding so hard. The blade glistened in the light, the tip a mere foot from my body, just as in my vision.
‚Do it,' I whispered. ‚Just do it, child.'
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The blade descended as Lucan cried, ‚NO!' from the perimeter of the circle.
But it was too late. The sword sliced cleanly into my chest, cutting through flesh and bone, embedding into my heart. I felt my heart stutter one time and then still, as my vision turned cloudy and then faded to inky black.
And then suddenly, I was standing next to the chieftain, watching Raquel weep as her body was bathed in my blood.
‚Raquel,' I said quietly, grasping her arm.
She turned and gasped. I knew I must appear as the warriors, slightly transparent and glowing. She looked from me to my inert body lying in a pool of blood on the stone. I could feel Lucan and Hecate watching me, as well. The meadow was silent, the air charged with what had just transpired.
In all honestly, I didn’t feel any differently. My hand on Raquel’s arm felt firm and solid, as though I was flesh and blood. My feet were planted firmly in the soil, my hair was rustling in the wind. The only difference was that my heart didn’t beat in my chest.
‚It is alright,' I assured everyone.
Hecate nodded knowingly. She was accustomed to supernatural things and this did not surprise her. Lucan was astounded, but as always, he handled himself with strength, standing stoically behind me. My daughter launched herself at my legs, weeping.