Pinch Me

  “Checking?”

  He grimly nodded. “I’m not taking any chances.” He grabbed his bag and started down the hall before he turned. “Are you okay with me sleeping in bed with you?”

  His question filled her with a mix of emotions she couldn’t sort through. Mentally, cognitively, emotionally, she knew this man was someone she had a strong, loving, intimate relationship with.

  On the other hand, he was also still a stranger to her, except for all the good feelings when she thought about him.

  But few memories.

  He seemed to read her indecision. “If you say no, I’ll sleep in the guest room. But I won’t leave you alone in the apartment.” He smiled. “Besides, Doogie missed his momma, and you aren’t in any shape to walk him.”

  His playful, caring tone pulled at her. “You’re good at pushing my buttons aren’t you?”

  His face transformed. For a moment, she thought he’d cry.

  She hoped he didn’t.

  “That’s what you always say.”

  Laura reached out and touched his hand. “I think we can try it. If I’m not comfortable, we won’t do it again, for a little while at least. Okay?”

  He nodded. “Deal.” He hesitated, then leaned in and gently pressed a kiss to her forehead. She caught his spare hand and pulled him back in for another kiss, this one on the lips.

  “Deal,” she said, giving him a smile.

  * * * *

  Rob could tell Laura was tired and in pain, so he sent her and Doogie to go lie down on the couch while he fixed them dinner. He decided on macaroni and cheese with hot dogs. It was an easy and quick meal she usually preferred when she wasn’t feeling well.

  He watched over the pass-through as she turned on the TV and channel surfed. After five minutes she settled on cartoons. He smiled as he observed from his vantage point in the kitchen.

  Some things hadn’t changed. Laura was a kid at heart. Whenever she couldn’t find anything else she wanted to watch, Scooby-Doo or The Flintstones or any of her other favorite cartoons were a preferred choice.

  Rob put a pot of water on for the macaroni and leaned against the kitchen counter.

  It’ll just be a matter of time before she recalls other things.

  Wouldn’t it?

  He held on to that thought like a magic charm. The possibility of her never remembering terrified him. The neurologist already warned him her memory could come back in strange ways, if at all. And anything she did remember should be considered a blessing and not an indication of its importance in her mind before the attack.

  He’d seen proof of that today. But Doogie? Steve, he could understand. She loved him like a father.

  But the dog?

  The water boiled and Rob threw in the pasta. The hot dogs only took a minute to nuke. Laura looked at the plate before taking it from him. “I like this?”

  “You used to.”

  Dubiously, she tried it, then smiled. “I still do.”

  He laughed. “Yanking my chain again.”

  “Gotta ring your bell—”

  Rob froze, his fork halfway to his mouth, the hope nearly painful in his chest as his heart pounded. The look of concentration on her face bore silent testimony to the war going on inside her to retrieve the rest of the memory. He put his fork down and waited, hopeful.

  Finally the frustration sent her into tears. “I’m sorry. There was something, but it’s gone.” She put her plate down and limped to her bedroom.

  Doogie, torn between his upset mistress and a now-accessible plate of food, faced a moral battle known to dogs throughout history. He finally chose Laura and padded after her, casting one last longing look at the plate on the coffee table.

  Rob’s appetite disappeared. It was frustrating how she seemed to pull other thoughts from the past, but couldn’t remember him or their relationship. Did it mean maybe she had second thoughts she never voiced before the attack? The neurologist’s words gave him little comfort.

  Despite Shayla’s assurances that she’d been as crazy in love with him as he was with her, it still hurt.

  He picked up the plates and carried them to the kitchen before going to her room.

  The door was open, lights off. Laura had sprawled across the middle of her bed, Doogie lying next to her. She never used to let him get on the bed. Doogie didn’t seem inclined to remind her.

  The Lab looked up and gave him a “please don’t tell her” look. Rob sat down and stroked the dog’s fur.

  “Want to talk?”

  Laura shook her head.

  “Want some company?”

  She paused, then shook her head. “Not right now. I’m sorry. I’ll be out in a little while.”

  He fought the urge to ask her to change her mind. Before, she would hunt him down to talk, curling up in his lap, ready and willing to share whatever was on her mind.

  “Okay.” He went back to the living room and channel surfed.

  It was going to be a long night.

  * * * *

  She returned twenty minutes later, Doogie on her heels. He warmed up her dinner and sat with her while she ate. When she finished, he offered to take her plate for her, but she wanted to do it.

  When she stood to walk to the kitchen, Doogie started to follow her but broke formation and trotted to the front door where he sat, looking from Laura to Rob.

  “He needs to go out,” Rob said. “I’ll take him.” He grabbed the leash and closed the door behind him.

  Laura stood in the living room, realizing how empty the apartment felt without them. She noticed the blinds were still open and moved to close them. Looking out the dark window accentuated how vulnerable she felt. She jumped when the phone rang.

  Following the sound, she located the base unit for the cordless phone on the kitchen counter. She picked up the handset and fumbled it. “Hello?”

  There was silence on the other end, then a click and the dial tone. The phone felt icy in her hand and she dropped it without thinking. Racing for the front door, she nearly collided with Rob as he came in.

  He calmed her down enough for her to tell the story. She didn’t have a caller ID display on the older phone. Rob tried *69, but it came up an unavailable number.

  He called Thomas to notify him of the hang-up call.

  Thomas said it was probably nothing. Then again, with her attacker still on the loose they couldn’t be sure. They had a standing order to trace all calls on her phone and would have to run it.

  After the excitement died down, Laura wandered into her office and looked around before she sat at the desk. Rob followed her in.

  “Want me to walk you through it?” he asked, and she nodded.

  “Please.”

  He reached around her and turned on the monitor and tower. “I just left everything the way it was. I didn’t delete your email or anything.”

  “That’s okay. I’ve got to learn how to do this.”

  He showed her as he logged into her email. There were over a thousand new messages for her to wade through.

  It wasn’t until she had almost all the messages sorted that a new one arrived, with the subject line Congratulations.

  She opened it.

  You got lucky the last time. Don’t worry, I’ll be seeing you again. Soon.

  Laura screamed.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Thomas personally responded to the call, dressed in shorts and a T-shirt with his badge hanging from a lanyard around his neck. Rob finally got Laura calmed down and asleep in bed with the aid of the anti-anxiety medication Dr. Simpson had prescribed for her, and a dose of the painkillers, with Doogie protectively curled next to her.

  He stood in the living room and talked with Thomas in low tones so as not to disturb her. “So we’re looking for someone who’s not only psychotic and vicious, but also a computer expert?” Rob felt disgusted by the lack of answers and compounding questions.

  He also fought his own rising panic that he might not be able to protect Laura from her a
ttacker. He couldn’t quit work to watch over her twenty-four-seven.

  “Not necessarily,” Thomas said. “There’s readily available information out there about concealing your identity on the Internet. Whoever sent her that message knew how to mask his IP address, but it wasn’t foolproof. It came up as a computer in a public library in Vancouver, Washington.”

  “You don’t look convinced.”

  “I’m not. It’s going to take some digging to determine if we can locate his true location.”

  “Aren’t there people who can track freaks like this?”

  “We’ve forwarded the information to the FDLE and they’re working on it.”

  “That’s not good enough. This guy’s still out there getting his jollies tormenting her. Who knows if he’s going to come back to finish the job?”

  From the grim look on the detective’s face, Rob knew he’d hit the nail on the head. “You’re sure he’ll come back, aren’t you?”

  “I’ve already spoken my piece that it might not be a bad idea to invest in an alarm system and get her a concealed carry permit as soon as possible.”

  “This is an active threat. Can’t we get a deputy assigned to her again?”

  “We don’t have concrete proof it was from her attacker, for starters, even though it certainly looks like it. Our department is overworked and understaffed. There’s no way they’ll approve someone sitting on her now that she’s home. Not unless you pay an off-duty officer. I had to pull strings as it was to keep an officer on her in the hospital.”

  Rob ran a hand through his hair. “We can’t afford that.”

  Thomas looked at the wall of pictures in the entry way. He pointed to the one of Laura and her brother. “Didn’t you say her brother lives out west? Send her out there for a while.”

  “She’ll never go for it. And she just got out of the hospital. How am I supposed to help her get her memory back if she’s out there?”

  “I don’t have any good answers for you. I’m sorry.”

  Rob managed to fight the urge to punch his fist through the wall in frustration. Finally, he turned to Thomas. “You find that fucker,” he warned. “You find him before I do, because I’ll kill him if he comes near her. There won’t be a fucking trial, because I’ll put a bullet in his goddamned brain.”

  The detective nodded. “I hear you. I also want to warn you that’s not something you should be saying to me. Don’t go off on a vigilante kick and hurt the wrong person.”

  “The only person I’ll hurt is anyone who tries to hurt her.”

  After seeing Thomas out, he locked the door behind him and went to check on Laura again.

  Despite his love for her, he also felt the most un-Domly of his life, considering his helplessness to protect her.

  * * * *

  Laura was still sound asleep when Bill called after midnight. He was in the car with Steve and heading back from the airport.

  Rob closed the bedroom door so Laura couldn’t hear. “I’ll wait up for you.” After hanging up, Rob settled on the couch to watch TV and await their arrival. He didn’t dare leave the condo unlocked. That’d be stupid, considering what happened.

  When Rob had finally talked to Bill, he’d broken down on the phone as he told Bill what happened. Both men agreed if they ever got their hands on the guy who did this to Laura, they’d take care of him themselves without help from law enforcement.

  It was nearly one thirty in the morning when Rob heard a car pull up outside. He looked through the front window to see Steve parked there.

  Stepping outside, Bill gave him a huge hug. “Sorry I wasn’t here earlier,” Bill said, his voice thick with emotion.

  “It’s okay. You’re here now.”

  Steve and Rob helped him get his bags inside to the guest room before Steve took off for home.

  “How’s she doing?” Bill asked him.

  Rob shook his head and filled him in on the evening’s events. “Thank god the meds knocked her out.”

  “Jeez, they can’t track the fucker?”

  “It’s complicated. And…don’t get upset when you see her in the morning. She still looks pretty bad.”

  “How bad? Steve said he wanted me to talk to you about her condition.”

  “Bad. Just don’t get all choked up or anything. I’m having a hard enough time keeping it together.” They said good-night and Rob gently closed the bedroom door behind him.

  Laura lay curled on her left side, on the left side of the bed. Normally he slept there and she slept on the right, but he wasn’t about to disturb her.

  Doogie, however, he had no qualms about evicting. He tapped the dog on the head and quietly snapped his fingers before pointing at the floor.

  The Lab raised his head to look at him, thumped his tail, then plopped his head down again.

  Suppressing the urge to make noise, Rob tapped him on the head again and pointed at the floor, more forcefully this time.

  Doogie once again raised his head and must have realized Rob really meant it. With a disgusted sigh of his own, the dog slowly sat up and yawned before taking his sweet time jumping down onto the floor.

  If it wasn’t for the other circumstances, Rob would have laughed over it. But he carefully slid under the covers next to her. He’d opted to sleep in shorts, considering she’d gone to bed in an oversized T-shirt and underwear.

  If it took time for her to get back to where they used to be, he’d wait. He’d do anything she needed.

  Anything to prove to her how much he loved her.

  He reached out and touched a strand of her hair. I love you, baby girl. I love you so much it hurts. I just want you back, however I can get you.

  * * * *

  The dream happened again, almost exactly as it’d started in the hospital. Sitting at the computer. The blinking skull.

  The pounding on the door.

  This time, she walked farther into the living room, knowing if she opened the door a large, black shadow would fill the doorway.

  Fear filled her, along with anger. Whoever it was, they’d taken her life away from her. They hadn’t killed her, but worse, they’d stolen the very core of her personality.

  She started to reach for the door when she started awake, gasping as her heart thundered in her chest.

  Next to her, Rob soundly slept.

  Reassured by his warm presence, she reached behind her and put a hand on his hip before crashing back into sleep.

  * * * *

  When the alarm on his phone went off at five, Rob contemplated calling in for a moment. Laura slept through it, and he stared at her in the dim light cast by the nightlight in the master bathroom.

  Doogie had crawled back up on the bed at some point and was curled at her feet.

  The Lab looked at him but didn’t move, apparently hoping he was invisible.

  Rob got up and pulled on a T-shirt before moving to the door. With another quiet snap of his fingers, he motioned to the dog to come.

  Reluctantly, after giving Laura and the now-empty real estate on her other side a longing glance, he jumped from the bed and padded after Rob.

  Rob waited until he had the bedroom door closed to look down at the dog. “You’re a mooch, you know that?”

  Doogie wagged his tail.

  He followed Rob into the kitchen and waited while he made the coffee before heading for the front door. Rob had just snapped the leash to the dog’s collar when the door to the guest bedroom opened and Bill emerged.

  “Please tell me that’s coffee I smell,” he mumbled.

  “Yeah. I’ll be right back.”

  Bill waved at him and headed toward the guest bathroom while Rob took the dog out. When he returned, Bill was standing in the kitchen with an empty mug in front of him on the counter and waiting for enough coffee to brew that he could pour a mug.

  “You didn’t have to get up this early,” Rob said.

  Bill nodded. “Yeah, I did. I think it’ll be best if you wake her up before you leave.”

/>   “Why? I want her to sleep.”

  Bill sleepily arched an eyebrow at him. “I don’t want to freak her out, her waking up to find you gone and someone she doesn’t recognize here instead.”

  “Oh. Good point.” He thought about it. “She recognized Steve. Maybe she’ll remember you. And she’s seen your picture.”

  “That’s not the same.” He grew tired of waiting and pulled the carafe out to pour himself half a cup. “You said she didn’t recognize Carol and she’s known her as long.”

  “True.” Rob grabbed the mug he usually used and tried not to look at Laura’s mug, which sat next to it. Oversized, it was bright lime green and bore the picture of Scooby-Doo. He’d given it to her two birthdays ago after finding out how much she loved the cartoon dog.

  “She’s tough,” Bill insisted. “She’ll get her memories back.”

  “I hope you’re right.”

  * * * *

  Rob grabbed his things and took a shower in the guest bathroom so he didn’t wake Laura too soon. But as it drew close to time for him to leave, he knew he had to wake her.

  He returned to the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed after turning on one of the bedside lamps. “Laura, hon? I need to leave for work.”

  She mumbled something and tried to roll over, but then apparently the pain in her still-tender ribs jolted her from sleep.

  Rob helped her sit up. “I’m sorry, sweetie. Bill’s here. I wanted to make sure I…” He swallowed back the hitch in his throat and tried again. “He’s awake. I wanted to make sure you were okay before I go.”

  “Bill?”

  “Your brother.”

  “Oh.” She slowly nodded, sleep still obviously in charge. “Okay.”

  She let him help her up and to the bathroom. He waited outside the door until she was done, then gave her his arm to hold onto as he walked her out to the living room, where he settled her on the couch. “I’ll get you some coffee and your pain meds.”

  “Okay. Thanks.”