Home Torn

  “What was her name?”

  “I dunno. Didn’t talk much, but Mae thought the sun set around that girl. She went in a slump for a good few months after that girl took off.”

  “Yeah, I remember that. Whole town was in an uproar because Erica and that guy started hooking up. No one seemed to like that couple,” Jonah murmured, his voice slightly muffled as if he hunched forward over his drink.

  It was enough for her to hear and Dani slid off her barstool. No one noticed as she made her way to the door and just as her hand reached to open it, she heard Barrow mumbled, “It’s a damn shame too. Mae was hoping that girl would come back for the youngest’s funeral. When she didn’t show, Mae went into another stupor for a few months. She got her heart broken by that girl.”

  Her mind was whirling as she got in her car.

  She hadn’t realized. All those years she thought no one cared. She hadn’t realized how Aunt Mae would’ve taken it. Her aunt was so strong and independent. Nothing penetrated her and she just held firm. Unwavering under any circumstance.

  Dani hadn’t known.

  Arriving at Mae’s cabin, Dani circled around and approached the lakefront. The dock was still sturdy, Aunt Mae kept everything up and she’d put a fresh coat of stain on the wood so it looked brand new. Sitting down at the end of the dock, Dani dipped her toes into the water. It felt warm, fresh, and like a different world.

  Water held a refuge from land and air, but the sound of an approaching car interrupted any other daydreams that might set her body to take a swim. Dani stood and walked off the deck, back around the cabin.

  Jake’s police cruiser had just parked beside the Mustang and he wasn’t alone.

  Jonah Bannon was in the front passenger seat.

  Both men were watching Dani as she paused, hands on her slim hips. Waiting.

  Ignoring Jonah and his piercing eyes, she tilted her chin towards Jake as they both climbed out of the cruiser. “Hey, Jake.”

  He looked like he had seen a ghost. He got out of the car, but didn’t come near her. Jonah remained beside his door, just resting his back against it with his arms crossed.

  “What’s going on, Jake?” Dani asked again, silently cursing as her voice came out slightly huskily. Jake had once whispered she had a throaty voice that could turn heads and knees. It worked on his every time.

  He shifted on his feet and glanced upwards to her. “I didn’t believe it. Uh…,” he coughed again, clearing his throat a second time. “Uh…Julia knows you’re back. She called me to tell you that you can’t go to the house, but I…I can’t believe it’s you. I didn’t believe it.”

  “Tonight?” But Dani knew better.

  “You never called or came back for Erica’s funeral and Julia’s got a lot on her plate with taking care of her aunt Kathryn.”

  “My aunt Kathryn.”

  “Uh.” He was visibly shaken. “Yeah.”

  “Jake.”

  “Yeah?” He kept shaking his head.

  “You go back,” Dani spoke up. “And tell Julia that I heard her message.”

  Jake waited, but when no other message followed, he glanced up in surprise. “That’s it?”

  “What else do you want me to say?”

  “I don’t know…I just…”

  Dani saw the struggle and she caved. She crossed to him and leaned close to kiss his cheek. Once. Softly. Then she held his head and pulled his forehead down to her lips where she placed another tender kiss there. Standing close, she whispered, “I loved you and that love doesn’t disappear, but I’m back and things are different.”

  “What about Julia?” Not Erica.

  They’d never discussed Erica. Not in five years, not in the four he’d been with her and held her hand as she died before him.

  “What about Julia?”

  “She’s,” he looked up and held her eyes. “She lost a sister, Dani. Julia’s not…she needs Aunt Kathryn and me now more than ever.”

  “Then you best stay away from me. It can’t be easy for Julia knowing that I’m back.”

  He caught his breath, searching her almond eyes.

  “You look so much like your mother. Do you know that, Dani?”

  She hadn’t seen a picture of her mother in eight years. They’d been burned after the funeral.

  Dani stepped back. “How do you know that?”

  Jake shook his head. “Never mind.”

  “Jake—”

  “I best be going now, Dani. You said it yourself. It can’t be easy for Julia knowing that I’m here talking with you.”

  She nodded.

  Moving back to his door, he paused. “Where’ve you been these five years, Dani?”

  Why are you back now? That was the unspoken question felt in the air.

  No one was surprised when she didn’t answer.

  Jake slid back into his car and a second later, the police cruiser was heading back down the driveway. Jonah was studying her Mustang.

  “It’s not for sale and you can start walking. It’s two miles before you’ll see anyone for a ride.”

  Jonah flashed a smile. “This is a sweet ride.”

  “Which is why it’s not for sale.”

  “Which is why you’re going to get to know me very well.”

  “I got no time for charmers like you. It’s wasted on me so save that smile for some other weak-willed girl.” Ignoring him and everything else, she went inside and locked the door.

  It had been almost three months since she’d had a full night’s sleep. The nightmares were the worst. They ripped through her, caused her to wake up gasping, feeling the sudden onset of rushing waters, ready to drown her. The screams surrounded her and caused her heart to clench in ice-cold fear.

  Some were paralyzed, some ran, and some tried to fight. But, you see, in those situations when it’s life or death, you can’t fight if there’s nothing to fight against. Sometimes you just gotta run…and pray. Pray fervently with every breath in your body. That’s all a person can do some days.

  Dani had never been a religious person. She’d grown up going to church. Aunt Kathryn dragged them every Sunday, even when Julia and Erica were hung-over from their latest drunken escapade the Saturday night prior. But it never stuck. It was just an uncomfortable building that she sweated in and was rewarded with a slap every time she shifted to appease the ache in her back.

  No, she’d never been a religious person then, but she was one now. She learned to pray to God and some days she learned that he answered.

  He answered her one time. That was enough for Dani.

  But nights like these, in her solitary cabin, the nightmares kept her awake. Some nights were worse. She thought, at first, that the noisier the city, the more she’d be restless and the nightmares would be even more alive and in the flesh. It made sense, so why not find somewhere absolutely peaceful and quiet?

  But, even there, in that secluded cabin with silence and stillness surrounding—the nightmares came.

  People screaming. Babies crying. The pounding of desperate sprints for life. And the wall of water that rained down on them, silencing all prayers. That’s what kept Dani awake at night.

  Gasping, she moved to the edge of the bed, the same nightmare still vivid in her mind and body, Dani dragged in some air and exhaled.

  She could still hear the sirens in the distance. She flinched.

  “Hell…” Dani cursed, catching a glimpse of the clock. Three in the morning, she’d gotten five hours of sleep. She hated to admit it, but she tried to put off sleep as long as possible. But it was inevitable.

  She’d been given a card for times like this. Times when she’d been preached to about. If the nightmares kept coming, she’d need to talk. But that was the problem. Dani didn’t talk unless it was necessary. She still got five hours of sleep. She didn’t need to talk, but her hand still reached for her purse and pulled out the card. The number was bold and black. Emblazoned for easy reading.

  “You’ve been through an awful and h
orrible event in your life. You’ll need help and when you want it, it’s there, Dani.”

  That’s what she’d been told when she told them she was leaving for home as she checked herself out at the front desk.

  She couldn’t heal there so she’d heal at home.

  Stretching her neck, kneading the sore muscles there, she moved to the kitchen and ran a cold glass of water.

  She heard another voice from the past, the recent past, “I’m here for you, Dani, if you decide to stop running. I’ll always love you, you know that. I’m here for you, but I can’t keep following you around.”

  Boone had asked her to marry him.

  She was staring out the kitchen window with a bare finger.

  She’d made her choice. Her hand twitched, spilling water into the sink.

  Sighing, she placed her cup on the counter and glanced to the clock again.

  Three a.m. That meant that Aunt Mae would probably still be awake. Dani changed into a pair of jeans and tank-top. Purse over one arm, she grabbed her keys and hotfooted it to the Mustang. A second later, she was speeding back through the twists and turns of her driveway. As she came upon the main highway, Dani let the car sit and idle a second. Just over the ditch, right alongside the highway, was the town’s livelihood.

  Falls River.

  It encompassed their entire state and wound its way all the way through the next two and into Canada. Most of the workers who settled in Craigstown worked at the dam, not far north. It kept their town with food and fuel. And life. Many nights she remembered jumping off a certain bridge, not three miles from Mae’s place.

  It was Tenderfoot Rush. A bridge where everyone, every teen and every adult, had jumped off, either naked, dressed, or in swim trunks. Everyone did it; it was the favored pastime of the summer. If you couldn’t find anyone in town and it was over 100 degrees in humidity, that meant a person just had to check Tenderfoot Rush. They were always there. The place was built on memories—from everyone. And so many decided to make the trek to Mae’s Grill, just three miles south. Many tubing trips started at Tenderfoot Rush and pulled out at Mae’s Grill.

  There were still a few cars in the parking lot and she heard yelling from inside. “Barney, get the hell out of here before I skin your cat alive. You hear me?!” Mae was screaming.

  “Aw, come on, Mae. I don’t got nowhere to sleep tonight. Can’t drive, you made sure of that when you took my keys.”

  “I don’t care. It’s not my problem. If you’re fool enough to get annihilated and think I’ll let you drive out of here, just inviting a lawsuit against my bar—you’re a damn fool. You drink, that means you’re not driving, but that still means you’re not my problem. Now git! Get out of here!”

  “But, Mae…” He slumped on his stoop at the bar.

  “I mean it and don’t make me roust the sheriff from his sleep. Hank don’t take no likin’ to drunks on these nights.”

  Barney retorted, his speech slurred, “He wouldn’t come. More’n’likely he’d send one of the deputies, maybe even Jakers. Jakers is nice to me.”

  Mae slapped a towel on the counter. “Jake is nice to a barn fly, but I give him the say-so and he’d have your ass slapped with a court order to stay away from the likes of here. You can go and join the other wrecks at Phillsby’s Tank.”

  “Ah, now…come on, Mae!” His head whipped up, but he had a hard time focusing on where Mae stood because he was looking to the left. Mae stood to his right. “Don’t be doing that and making those threats. Phillsby’s Tank is nothing but a biker bar. Those Hell’s Angels ride in and out of there on a daily basis. I can’t be seen around no Hell’s Angels.”

  “Then you better get up and git. Now.”

  “But I don’t got no place to sleep, Mae,” he whined again, settling his forehead on the counter again. “And Jakers is too nice to do something like that.”

  “That boy is my future nephew-in-law. If I put the screws to him, he’d buckle and ya’ll knows it.”

  “Yeah, from a family that don’t even want you around no more.” Barney had a death wish, and a second later his words penetrated his skull and he was up looking alarmed and pale. “Oh gosh—I didn’t mean…Mae, that didn’t come out right. I’m sorry—”

  “You. Get. Out. Now.”

  “I’s going, Mae. I didn’t mean nothing by what I’s just said. I mean it, Mae. I speak without a brain thought sometimes, you know. I’m sorry, Mae…,” But he made a scramble for the door. He turned back and opened his mouth, but nothing came out when his eyes alighted onto Dani’s form.

  Mae saw his pause and turned too.

  “She sure is purrty, Mae.”

  Mae threw a bottle at him. “Every damn night it’s the same thing over and over. I’m getting tired of that boy. He needs professional counseling, if you know what I mean.”

  Dani remained frozen in one spot. Tired…and knowing that she looked pale as a ghost. The nightmares still resonated with her.

  “I should just make Jake kick him out of town. Barney don’t got no family here and he doesn’t have a job. He’s got nothing. Jake could take him out of town in his cruiser and let him hitchhike to the next town with a soft-spot for a young kid like him who’s in obvious need for therapy.” Mae kept griping, cleaning faster and faster.

  “Mae.”

  “No.” Mae shook her head. “No, girl. You sit and help yourself to some coffee. I brewed a fresh batch not long ago. It always takes all my energy to argue with that damn stubborn drunk. Skin his cat alive next time he pulls another stunt like tonight. No more. He always says he won’t be a problem if I let him have the bottle, but he’s always harping for a place to sleep.”

  Spotting the coffee, she poured herself a mug and sat down.

  “That Jake stopped by not long after you took off this afternoon.”

  “Yeah.” Dani took a sip. “I talked to him for a little bit. Julia doesn’t want me out at the house. She doesn’t even want me to see Aunt Kathryn.”

  “That—!” Mae whipped her rag across the now-empty bar. “Can’t say I’m surprised.” She heaved a deep sigh to calm herself.

  “Yeah, well…” Dani shrugged. “Neither am I.”

  “So what are you going to do? You don’t strike me as someone who’d put up with that.”

  “I did before.”

  “You’re not you from before.”

  Dani narrowed her eyes. “What do you mean?”

  “Come on, Danielle. You’re not the same girl that left these parts five years ago. You’ve seen some of what life has to offer and I’m betting it’s not the side that goes to operas and sings church hymns. So what are you going to do?”

  “I don’t know,” Dani confided, a faint grin on her pale features. Features that seemed fragile at times, but Mae knew better.

  “I think you’ve got two choices. You either let your sister order you around and you follow with your tail’s ass tucked between those long-leggedy legs or, you let Julia know who’s come back. I’m thinking she hasn’t been told of the changes everyone’s talking about when those people were all too eager to tell her that little Dani came home.”

  “People are talking about me?”

  “It’s big news when the middle O’Hara comes back to town after vanishing five years ago. It’s even bigger news when she left a slip of a girl and comes back a graceful young woman, one with a backbone. And that this is the same girl that holds first love on that Jake’s life. That’s some very big news indeedy.”

  Small towns meant big mouths. Dani knew that, she’d always known that, but still…it surprised her that they gossiped about her.

  Her.

  “You think good and hard about what you’re going to do, but I’d sure like to be around when you decide. I could do for some good ol’ O’Hara fireworks. It’s been a while.” Mae chuckled. “Let’s go. You can come and enjoy a nightcapper with me. You know me and my wind down drink. Need it like my breathing tube when I land myself in the nursing home one day. It’
s gonna be a bitch having a smoke with a damn breathing tube on my back.”

  Dani grinned as she followed her aunt through the door and to Mae’s home next door. The summer heat had been replaced with a biting cold in the evenings.