Poppies

Jobeth stood on the front porch of Chad’s parent’s house. She was excited and frightened for more than one reason.

  One, she was going to see her daughter after so many years and two, she was afraid Joanna wouldn’t want to see a mother who had cast her aside so easily.

  She took a deep breath and knocked on the door. The wind rustled the few grays in her hair and her hand flew up to tuck the loose strands back into their proper places.

  Alex answered the door, surprised to see Jobeth standing before her. The women were around the same age but looked quite different from each other.

  Alex was round and stern looking, whereas Jobeth was lean and soft. It was funny how looks could be deceiving. It had been the stern looking woman who’d taken Joanna under her wing and nurtured her burdened soul, and the soft woman who had cast her out of the nest so coldly.

  “Hello, Mrs. Benson,” Alex said matter-of-factly. She didn’t know Jobeth Benson, but she did see how her rejection of her daughter tortured Joanna day in and day out. Alex had never had daughters. Only Neil junior and Chad had blessed their home, but if she had been fortunate to have a daughter of her own, she knew she would never have been able to abandon her child, no matter what they had done.

  “Good day, Mrs. Willis.” Jobeth stood up tall and straight in front of Chad’s mother. One thing Jobeth despised was people looking down on her. She’d

  been looked down on as a young girl. She wouldn’t be looked down on now or ever.

  Alexandria Willis began to frown. Jobeth looked ready for a fight the way she adjusted her back so rigidly. She couldn’t help remembering a few years back when Joanna and Chad had first run off together. Jobeth came pounding on their door, demanding that they tell her where Chad and Joanna had taken off to. When they refused, Jobeth had been furious. She’d accused Chad of ruining the Benson family and said that Mara-Joy would never be the same after the cruelty their son had inflicted on their family.

  Thinking about that night more than seven years ago, Alex became very angry. What did this woman want now? Was she ready to cause another scene?

  I won’t let her do it, Alex thought. I’ll be a mother to that sweet girl. I won’t allow this woman to hurt Joanna anymore. She frowned defensively at Jobeth.

  Jobeth noticed Alex frowning at her and felt a twinge of guilt. She too remembered the last encounter they had and was not proud of herself.

  “Could I please speak to my daughter?” Jobeth said steadfastly. She needed to speak to Joanna. She realized how much she had treated her differently throughout her life and maybe Constance and Pauline too. She couldn’t remember doing anything special for her natural daughters’ lives as she had always done for Mara-Joy and Alan-Michael. She had favored her eldest and youngest children and now she had to make it up to the rest of her offspring before it was too late. If it wasn’t already.

  “She’s not here,” Alex said, crossing her arms over her plump breast. “She’s with Chad and the children.” She watched to see if Chad’s name made Jobeth flinch. When it didn’t, she felt a little relieved and figured she might as well tell Jobeth where they were.

  “Your husband and two other daughters are with them. They are having a picnic down by the lake,” Alex continued, hoping she wasn’t making a mistake.

  “Thank you.” Jobeth smiled warmly. Alex nodded and watched Jobeth quickly run down the front porch stairs.

  “I hope it’s not too late for you, Jobeth,” Alex said, shaking her head. “I hope you aren’t going to continue spending time ignoring your daughter. If you do, you will miss out on the lovely woman you’ve created, a daughter much sweeter and kinder than that one you have revered all these years.” Alex gave a soft kind of smile as she watched Jobeth disappear.

  Joanna sat peacefully on a rock by the stream. She watched as her beautiful daughter, Jena, ran toward her calling out her name.

  A warm feeling washed over Joanna as Jena stopped in front of her with a big pout protruding from rose petal lips.

  How I love this child, she thought. This child truly represents the strong parts of myself.

  Jena rested her tiny hands on her straight waist and pinched up her oval face in concern. Her wavy blond hair framed her expression, making her look more like a beautiful cherub than a child of seven.

  “Mommy, please don’t look gloomy,” Jena’s wee voice implored. She turned to her grandfather who was sitting on a blanket in the sand.

  Joanna smiled at her father as he admired them from afar.

  “I’m just fine, Jena,” she said, noticing her father was listening to them. “Go play with the other children.”

  Jena looked from her mother to her grandfather, searching for help. When she saw that her pleas fell on deaf ears, she ran off toward her father and brother.

  They were playing in the water, laughing and having a good time. Jena glanced back for a moment at Joanna and waved. Joanna waved back vigorously so that Jena wouldn’t worry about her but would have some fun. It must have worked because the little girl jumped into the water where Chad scooped her up into his arms. She giggled wildly as he tossed her up in the air and dropped her softly into the waiting water. Charles tugged at Chad’s swimming trunks, eager for his father to repeat the same process with him.

  “Papa?” Pauline called, walking toward Alan. Alan turned and admired his youngest daughter as she plunked herself down on the blanket beside him. She was a beauty of a girl. Her hair was pulled back in her favorite style, a ponytail, and as usual she was dressed in shorts and a casual button-up shirt with tennis shoes on her stocking-less feet. It amazed him how she could dress so plainly and look so elegant, without being aware of it. Out of all his children, it was only Pauline he could honestly say this about. All his daughters were beauties, but only Pauline was totally unaware of it. Maybe that was the reason she was the loveliest. That and her total innocence toward the world.

  He sighed as he watched the young woman sit down beside him.

  “All my children are growing up,” he said, placing his hand on Pauline’s face.

  She clutched his hand with her own and rubbed her cheek with it.

  “What’s wrong, Dad?” Pauline asked, sensing her father’s mood. Alan released his hold on her hand and turned toward Constance, who was picking apples with her family near the creek. Her baby was just about due and she was heavily weighed down with the burden of the child.

  “Oh,” he said reflectively, “I wish your mother and the rest of the family were here enjoying this glorious day with us.” He looked at Pauline’s worried face.

  Pauline felt uneasy about her father. He was thirty-nine years old, but sometimes he looked much older and this frightened her. She was afraid for him all the time. She loved him dearly and couldn’t stand the thought of anything happening to him.

  “Dad, I wish that too,” Pauline said, giving his hand a squeeze. “But Mara-Joy—“

  “Now it is not Mara-Joy’s fault,” Alan grumbled. “Constance and you are always blaming Mara-Joy for everything. You have to realize that your mother is the one who makes her own decisions in life. She always has and always will. She will have to take responsibility for her own actions. Good or bad.”

  “Well,” Pauline rolled her eyes in jest, “I suppose so, Pop. Anyway, I didn’t come over here to argue about Mom, I came to tell you I have to go. Pascal is waiting for me.” She leaned over and kissed Alan warmly on the cheek. He reached up and held her face to his, feeling the heat that was created from his daughter flow onto him. He closed his eyes and silently prayed for his younger daughter. Pauline cupped his hand and closed her eyes. She was so innocent. Alan was afraid she would be eaten up in the big, bad world. All he wanted to do was protect her.

  Pauline felt tears she couldn’t explain form in the corner of her eyes and a lump was developing in her throat, choking her. Quickly she kissed her father again and stood up, dusting the sand off of her legs.

  “Is this Pascal treating you right?” Alan shielded his eyes fr
om the glaring sun beating down on him as he looked up into Pauline’s face.

  “Yes, Dad,” Pauline said, walking away. “Of course.”

  Alan bit his bottom lip hesitantly. He liked George, Constance’s husband, well enough; but there was something about his brother, Pascal, that he just didn’t trust.

  Pauline trotted away wiping tears from her eyes. Alan wished he could be everywhere with his children protecting them, but he couldn’t. He also couldn’t force them to stay at home with him any longer, either.

  Jobeth stood in the hedges watching Pauline and Alan. She wondered what was wrong with her youngest daughter as she left in tears. She shook her head.

  Pauline wasn’t a little girl anymore. She was a grown woman. Jobeth jiggled her head, not wanting to believe Pauline had grown from a child into a woman without her ever recognizing it.

  Jobeth hadn’t noticed Joanna standing up after spotting her mother hiding in the bushes. She didn’t even notice the look Joanna gave her: a look of complete and utter joy.

  “Mama!” Joanna cried out with all her heart. Alan pivoted from his spot. He could see Joanna running toward his wife, who was standing behind a bush.

  Jobeth, hearing Joanna, twirled towards her and ran straight into her waiting arms. They hugged each other tightly, holding on like two drowning people.

  Alan nodded to himself with approval, a tear rolling down his cheek. He knew Jobeth wouldn’t let him down. She never had. She never would. She couldn’t abandon their daughter any more than he could.

  “Mama,” Joanna cried on her mother’s breast. “You do love me?”

  “Of course, my darling, I always have. I always have.” Jobeth held Joanna close, enjoying the feeling of her once again in her arms. She didn’t notice Jena running toward them. Alan stood up and went to stand beside Chad who had come out of the water with Charles after hearing Joanna cry out. They stood silently together watching their wives embrace one another.

  Constance and George stood watching too. Constance smiled to herself and turned back to face her husband and son, encouraging them to continue picking apples.

  This was Joanna’s moment.

  “Oh darling, I have been so foolish. Will you ever be able to forgive me?”

  Jobeth lifted Joanna’s tear-streaked face to her own.

  “There is nothing to forgive,” Joanna sobbed. “I have you back and that is all that matters.”

  “There is so much to forgive and I plan to try to make up for the wrong I have done to this family. It’s this family that means everything to me. Your father,”

  Jobeth glanced at Alan, who stood proudly looking on, and smiled, “and you children have always been my life. Always.”

  Jena, who was confused by what was happening, looked up at the woman her mother was hugging. She tugged on her skirt, wanting to find out who she was and why she was causing her mommy to cry.

  Jobeth, startled by the child, looked down unconsciously and lost her breath.

  The child was the spitting image of her long dead brother Pauli. Her hand flew to her mouth in astonishment. Her throat tightened. Memories, long since forgotten, flooded her mind. She never forgot Pauli, but had put his memory away to protect herself from old pain. Just like she had done with all the ones she had loved and lost.

  “Ma? What is wrong?” Joanna asked, frightened. Her heart skipped a beat as she reached to grab Jena. Jobeth was a ghostly white. Was Jena a reminder of what she had done to hurt the family? Did she still feel that Joanna’s children should be Mara-Joy’s?

  “Pauli.” Jobeth whispered bending down to Jena. “Do you remember me and your father telling you about your names, Joanna?”

  “I don’t understand, Ma,” Joanna said, confused, her heart racing. She held on to Jena’s arm defensively. Could her mother turn on her once again, now that she was face to face with the child she had with Chad?

  Jobeth touched the little girl’s face and the soft down of her blond hair. Still looking at Jena, Jobeth continued.

  “Mara-Joy was named after Tamara, her birth mother, whom you children never knew about. Joy was a nickname Shawna had picked out for her when she was just a little baby. It was very appropriate because she brought us such joy at a time when we didn’t have a lot of it.” Jobeth paused remembering the past vividly as though it were yesterday.

  “We had a wonderful friend whom we loved dearly named Jonah.”

  Joanna nodded, familiar with the story. She had known how Mara-Joy had received the name Joy, but hadn’t realized that she also carried her birth mother’s name.

  “Jonah was one of the sweetest people anyone could ever have known. It nearly killed your father, Shawna and me when he was killed. The pain was unbearable. But,” she brightened up, “we persevered and later had a daughter--you.” Jobeth beamed at Joanna. “You were our first natural child and it only seemed right that we name you after Jonah. He meant so much to all of us that I needed to feel his spirit near me and so I honored him by naming my child after him, twice.”

  Joanna was confused. Twice?

  “That is another story I will tell another time. It will all make sense, I hope, in the end.”

  “And so you became Joanna. Then Constance came, and we named her after my mother, whom I loved dearly. I will tell you many stories about what a wonderful woman she was. When Pauline was born was born I really thought she was a boy,” Jobeth chuckled. “I’ll be honest-really thought all you

  girls were going to be boys. I wanted a son to name after your father and mine. So when I had another girl, I named her after my little brother, who died after falling out of a tree. His name was Paul, but I called him Pauli. He was a fun, mischievous boy my parents and I adored.”

  “That’s the name you said to Jena,” Joanna whispered, hugging Jena to her side, everything falling into place.

  “Yes, it is,” Jobeth said to the silent child. The little girl stood transfixed by her grandmother’s words.

  “My little brother has been reborn in this child’s face. I swear,” Jobeth said, more to herself than to those around her.