Shades of Trust

I love these crazy girls. Alistair smiled at his blonde sisters-in-law. They had been a great help, protecting Gabriela and creating all kinds of mischief to distract her.

  “Mamãe, Mamãe!” Gabriela screamed, happily.

  Gabriela! My angel, my love! Sophia wanted to shout her joy out loud but she just fell on her knees, not caring if the marble floor would make a few more black-and-blue marks on her already injured body. She opened her arms and her daughter threw herself in them, giving Sophia one of her neck crushing hugs. She loved it when her child tried to hug her so hard she could barely breathe. Hugs like that made her day. Don’t cry, Sophia. Don’t cry. In a husky voice, she whispered, “Hello, Angel. I’ve missed you.”

  “I’ve missed you too, Mama. You didn’t tell me you were going away on a trip,” said Gabriela with a small pout, stepping back. She tilted her head to the side, her blue eyes taking in the scarf that covered her head and her bruised face. Her little hand stretched out and touched Sophia’s face. “What happened, Mama? Did you make a booboo?”

  Sophia’s throat clogged. She felt Alistair kneel down beside her. In a barely audible voice, she explained, “Yes, Angel. I’ll tell you the story, okay?”

  “It’s going to be a bedtime story, Fairy.” Alistair flung Gabriela up in the air and caught her in his arms as she squealed and giggled, giving Sophia time to compose herself, and kiss and embrace her younger sisters. “Your mother is going to tell you all about her adventures in a faraway land, okay?!”

  Sophia tucked the blanket around Gabriela and sat on the bed, leaning onto Alistair’s chest. “So, that afternoon, as I was waiting for you and Alistair to come home, I saw a dragon outside our house.”

  Gabriela’s sky-blue eyes opened wide. “A dragon?”

  “Mm-hmm. A huge, huge dragon,” Sophia moved her hands in the air, showing the size of the dragon, “with red eyes, blue and green scales, enormous wings and a long tail. He was up to no good: he ate all the narcissuses and drank all the water from the pond. When I saw that, I was very, very angry.”

  “Like when I misbehave?”

  Sophia smiled. “No, Angel. Like when Alistair, the Beast, gets angry.”

  “Wow!” Gabriela giggled as Alistair grunted loudly.

  “So, I went outside to shoo him away from our garden.”

  Gabriela’s eyes grew even larger. “But, Mama. A dragon. Weren’t you afraid?”

  Very, very much. Sophia felt Alistair’s hand squeezing her waist. “I was,” she nodded, “but he was going to eat your swing.”

  “Oh.” That surprised the little girl. “My wood swing? Did he?”

  “No. You know what he did, Gabriela? When I got outside, he roared at me,” she sighed. She didn’t want to tell Gabriela a bad story. She didn’t want to dwell on it.

  Abruptly, Sophia decided she was going to tell another story; one that deserved being told. “You know, Angel, I discovered it was not such a big dragon, but more of a child dragon which was lost in life. He was thirsty and hungry. Alone and afraid. He looked like a monster, but he was very nice. He had been grounded by his parents all his life, because no one understood him. All he wanted was to please and receive love in return. He didn’t like being grounded and he thought he knew better and ran away. He got lost and stopped to eat and drink. He asked me to stay with him and be his friend. I said I couldn’t, that I had my own daughter…” How to continue? “When Devon appeared, the dragon got too afraid. He picked me up in his claws and flew away, thinking he should protect me. So, you see, that is why I didn’t tell you I was going to travel. I didn’t know it was going to happen.”

  “Bad dragon. Bad, bad dragon.” Gabriela wasn’t even blinking anymore. “Why did he do it, Mama? Did it hurt?”

  Don’t think of it, Sophia. She put her hand over her daughter’s. “He was not bad, I guess. Just too afraid. And no, it didn’t hurt. He was tender and he flew very high, up in the sky.” He went to Heaven, or so I hope. Sophia looked at the soft-pink blanket and smoothed her hand over it. She looked anywhere but at her daughter’s eyes. She didn’t know how to end the story because she was confused herself. Everything was coming back again, darkening the beautiful room, making the air heavy and impossible to breathe.

  Alistair tightened his hold on her and whispered in her ear, “Breathe.”

  “Where did he take you, Mama?” Gabriela asked.

  When Sophia didn’t answer, Alistair let Gabriela take control of the story to see how much she was willing to know, “If you got lost, where would you go?”

  “Home,” Gabriela replied without a doubt.

  Good girl. “That’s it. He looked and looked until your mother saw a beautiful castle in Heaven, with a pair of old, nice-looking dragons flying over it and showed it to him. They went there and they even had a chocolate cake party.”

  Gabriela watched Alistair’s and Sophia’s faces, furrowing her delicate blonde eyebrows in concentration. “I don’t understand.”

  Wait for her question. “What don’t you understand, Fairy?”

  “Why did he get chocolate cake if he ran away from his punishment?” She bit her lip, thinking. “Wasn’t he even badder?”

  “Worse.” Sophia smiled softy at her daughter’s lapse. “No, what he did was not worse. I realized that he lacked any real love, and that was very sad. He was not always a badly behaving boy. Like most of us, he was somewhere in between. He was good-hearted but sometimes without knowing, he behaved badly. In real life, sometimes, even badly behaved child-dragons deserve chocolate cakes. Children just want to be loved unconditionally, and be accepted for who they are, but there are always limits they have to respect. The dragon didn’t cause real mayhem and he was grounded unfairly. I liked and understood him. Hence, the chocolate cake party.”

  “That’s a terrible story, Mama. No princes. No witches. No kisses.” Gabriela shook her blonde head and pouted. “And the dragon cheated.”

  Sophia scooted closer to Gabriela and gave her a full smile. Terrible story, really. “It is a true story, my love. Actually, quite often many true things are terrible. You’d be surprised. There is not always a prince. Nor is there always a witch.” Sometimes there are psychos, though.

  “Who brought you back?”

  “The old lady dragon. She promised to take care of the little dragon I took to Heaven. Also, she knew that here on Earth, little children need their mothers,” Sophia said with a half-sad smile. She kissed her daughter and hugged her tight. “Good night, my love. Sleep well. I love you very much, Angel.”

  “I’m happy that you’re back. ‘Nite, Mama,” Gabriela threw her arms around Sophia’s neck and spread many little kisses on her cheek. “I love you too.”

  Sophia stood, making room for Alistair to kiss Gabriela.

  “Ah, Mama. What happened to your hair?” Gabriela’s eyes were glued to the scarf around Sophia’s head.

  Sophia froze for a moment. Then, slowly she raised her hand and patted the turban and repeated dumbly, “My hair?” I haven’t thought of an excuse for this.

  Alistair walked over to Sophia and assessed her expression before mouthing, “Trust me.”

  He stepped behind her, also facing Gabriela and supporting Sophia’s body with his. As he talked, he undid the turban. “You know that dragons can spit fire, don’t you, Gabriela?”

  “Yep, lots of fire. When they are angry, very angry,” the girl answered, her eyes huge. “The old lady dragon was angry at my Mama?!”

  He chuckled, feeling Sophia going lax with relief. “Nae, nae. The thing is, child dragons, they don’t know very well how to control their fire, especially when they get over excited.” The scarf fell over Sophia’s shoulders and the bandages appeared. “When he roared a happy goodbye at your mother, he spat fire and it burned her hair. She got a few blisters but it’s going to grow again, right?”

  “Ah. All right then. What’s the dragon’s name?”

  “His name was Nahte Drofhsa,” he answered as he redid the turban.

  ?
??Ugh,” Gabriela scrunched up her pert nose. “Everybody in your stories always has ugly names?”

  “Aye, always.” He smiled at her, endeared, and blew her a kiss while dimming the lights. “Oidhche mhath.”

  “Oidhche mhath, Daddy. Boa noite, Mamãe.”

  “Oidhche mhath?” Sophia asked as Alistair closed the door quietly.

  “Good night in Scottish Gaelic. The same as boa noite. I started a game with her while you were…” Alistair passed an arm around her waist, walking her back to the stairs. “One new word a day keeps the saudades away.” But it didn’t. “So I’m teaching her Scottish Gaelic and she’s teaching me Portuguese.”

  Oh, my love, that’s so sweet. “I love you so much,” she whispered, pressing herself closer to his body. “So much.”

  “We missed you. A lot.”

  “I also missed you both. I missed you all.”

  “Sophia.” He paused at the top of the stairs. “Was I right?”

  Intrigued, Sophia looked at her husband’s face. Hello, Lord Pokerface. “About?”

  “About the child dragon. You were talking about Ashford, weren’t you?”

  Drofhsa…N-a-h-t-e. Ethan! She inhaled a deep breath and blinked to whisk away the tears from her eyes. “Yes. Partially, yes. He deserved better. But his parents weren’t—” Shut up, Sophia. It’s not your story to tell.

  “I…I always thought I’d be the one to topple your enemies, to slay your dragons,” Alistair said. He couldn’t keep the disappointment out of his voice, because it was true. He had thought that. He’d hoped that. “I’m sorry I wasn’t the one to save you. That I wasn’t there.”

  What? Sophia turned around, astonished at Alistair’s unhappy gaze. “But you were there. I saw you in the ambulance. It was your loving gaze that calmed me. Your voice that brought me back. How can you say that you weren’t there for me?”

  “Stories are untamed and untamable fantasies.” Your feelings were talking loudly. “What damage will they create, if they spread out of our control? I was not the prince charming you deserved; the one that slew your enemies and saved you.”

  “Alistair Connor…” Sophia couldn’t believe her ears. Surprise was replaced by worry as she understood he was feeling guilty for not being in Ethan’s place. “I faced a few monsters. And I survived. I survived because I trusted you would do everything, anything, to take me out of that place. Tavish Uilleam told me how you planned everything, how you made him pilot the helicopter under a heavy gray sky, how you sent him along with Ethan and the police team. Your plan saved me. But, and this is a big but, I—even Tavish Uilleam or one of the officers—could be dead right now if not for Ethan. It would be ungrateful to not remember him with at least friendly care and tender feelings.”

  “Still, I did nothing—”

  “Maybe you didn’t in that moment, but you always do,” she corrected him and stared deeply into the forest-green eyes she had missed so much. “We both know dragons and princes charming don’t exist. There are no fairy tales. Real heroes are not only valued by just one act of courage or bravery, but also by small, gentle daily actions. What you didn’t do is not important. It’s only important what you do.”

  There was a long silence as Alistair returned her stare, taking in her words.

  “You, Alistair Connor, you are my hero, every day.”

  He put his arms around her and pulled her onto his chest, breathing deep her sweet aroma that always made everything seem so fresh. “I love you, Sophia.”

  In the Laird Library

  9:23 p.m.

  Everything was starting to ache again and Sophia’s eyes were almost closing in slumber. Tired, she put her head on Alistair’s shoulder.

  He instantly asked, “Do you want to call it a night?”

  “Mm-hmm,” she acknowledged, and stood on wobbly legs, unsteady, even in her Chanel flats.

  Alistair frowned at her precarious balance.

  When she stepped unevenly to kiss Angelica good night and almost fell, bracing herself on the arm of the sofa, he picked her up in his arms.

  “Alistair Connor, I can walk,” she sighed, rolling her eyes at him.

  He raised an eyebrow at her, unfazed, before saying, “Good night, everyone. See you tomorrow.”

  “Alistair Connor, put me down.” She whispered, “I’m not crippled.”

  Muffled giggles from the twins called Sophia’s and Alistair’s attention.

  He turned with his wife in his arms, trying to discern what the twin blondes were plotting this time.

  Their lips were opened in warm grins as they tilted their heads to the same side as if to have a better look at the couple.

  “Can you give us your personal trainer’s phone number?” Valentina asked and Victoria explained, “Maybe he could introduce us to some nice friends of yours.”

  Alistair’s mouth dropped open as Sophia blushed. “Girls!”

  Leonard cleared his throat to disguise the laughter as Felipe frowned at his beautiful sisters, asking, “Aren’t you too young to be having these thoughts?”

  Valentina and Victoria looked at each other, shook their heads and asked in sync, “What do they say about older brothers?”

  Tavish answered them, with a big smile on his handsome face, “That they are party poopers!”

  Spare me younger siblings. They crossed the double doors as laughter and whistles filled the library.

  “Teenagers…” Alistair muttered as he entered the lift.

  Sophia couldn’t hold her mirth anymore. “Lord Too-much-of-an-old-man.”

  He didn’t answer but she could see the curl on his lips at her tease.

  He entered their bedroom with Sophia still in his arms, well ensconced against his body, his strength and warmth flooding all her senses. Without even asking, he carried her past the dressing room and the threshold of the bathroom, slowly placing her feet on the floor.

  Suspecting he meant to stay, she held onto the counter and said, “I can do it on my own.”

  “You might fall,” he countered. His expression was doubtful and she used his hesitation to convince him.

  I might, but there is no way you’re staying. Out, Handsome. When his arms let her go, her knees almost crumpled, but she steadied herself. “I’m fine. Really.”

  Aye. Really. He thinned his lips and backed up, muttering something in Gaelic under his breath and leaned against the doorjamb. “Five minutes.”

  Sweet husband of mine. She locked the door and answered out loud just to provoke him, “I’ll take as long as I need.”

  “You have less than five minutes now, Beauty,” he grunted from the other side of the door. “For your information, this lock means nothing to me.”

  “Because you have another key?” Putting paste on her toothbrush, Sophia smiled. She could imagine him blowing out a breath and rolling his eyes.

  Nae. Because nothing can separate me from you anymore. Especially nothing as minor as a simple door. “Four minutes.”

  “Lord Stubborn,” she replied, bracing herself on the sink.

  This is my Sophia. “I prefer Lord Concerned,” he volleyed with a ghost of smile on his lips. His eyes wandered over to the bedroom and dressing room, checking if everything was as she liked it. He was planning on staying at Craigdale for a whole month at least. I should change rooms to The Duchess Apartments. It has enough space for us all and a separate studio for her if she wishes. I mustn’t forget to talk with Father tomorrow. He looked at his watch. “Two minutes. Do you want a nightgown?”

  She unlocked the door and put her hand outside. Weakly, she answered, “Yes, please.”

  He frowned when he heard her tone. He grabbed one of his long-sleeved T-shirts and carefully opened the door. “You push yourself too far, mo chridhe.”

  Tenderly, he pulled the T-shirt over her head and once again, he scooped her up, carrying her to the bed.

  She peeked at him through her closing eyes as he covered her with the goose-feather coverlet and handed her the nightl
y drug John had prescribed. I have the most handsome and gentle husband a woman could wish for.

  He bent and kissed her on the lips. “I’ll be quick.”

  “’Kay,” she whispered, pulling him down by the hair for another kiss. “I love you.”

  I love you more. “I know,” he smirked at her.

  She smiled. “Lord Convinced.”

  Sophia was fast and deep asleep in their bed when he walked out of the bathroom.

  He lay down and gathered her into his arms, spooning her and putting his broad hand under the T-shirt, against her stomach. She sighed happily, with an expression of utter rapture on her face, even in sleep, drawing joy from that simple caress.

  Alistair felt in heaven with Sophia lying in his arms; never was there a place he’d rather be than in bed with her close to him.

  Friday, April 1, 2011

  4:51 a.m.

  The room became black and empty, and Sophia knew exactly where she would be, exactly what it was going to change into. This was what it felt like, this was what it looked like, the edges of reality crumbling away.

  She forced her eyes to open. She was inside the dungeon, but she couldn’t see through the smoke as shots erupted around her.

  “No!” she cried out. Her arms felt very heavy and she struggled to run away. “No! Not again!”

  The clouds of smoke retreated and she saw she was carrying Ethan’s bloody body. She tried to hold onto him but her hold slipped as she stumbled on corpse after corpse that Uó threw in her way.

  “No,” Sophia said, her voice shaking. “This is just a nightmare. Just a nightmare.”

  “No, murderer. This is your reality. The reality you have created.” He laughed. And again, louder. His mouth opened full of sharp teeth when he said, “You’ll lose another man. Each time I come back, I’ll take another one from you.”

  Sophia felt the ground shaking and a mean creaking sound filled the dungeon. The rock floor cracked open and tall flames came up from the fracture, the noxious fumes of sulfur choking her.

  Under his horns, Uó’s black eyes gleamed evil when he offered, “Unless, of course, you’d prefer to immolate yourself.”