Unsaid

  “Meaning I may leave any time I like?” Vive wrinkled her red nose. “Right, Dad?”

  Good Lord, Vive. Don’t think like that.

  “The doctors will decide when you’re ready to return. That is, if you want to come back to Manhattan.” Georgette moved the papers closer.

  “Don’t be ridiculous. I’ve never heard of such a thing.” Vive thrust her fingers through her blonde hair. A bead of sweat collected on her forehead.

  Please, sign the frickin’ papers. Lex nearly chewed her bottom lip off.

  “Viveca, if you don’t finish the program and live a sober life, your mother and I will cut you off for good. For your own good,” Mr. Farnworth said sternly, his patience fading.

  “How long is the fucking program?”

  No one spoke.

  Please, go to therapy, Vive. The answer tore at Lex’s insides.

  Agitated, Vive grabbed her by the wrist. “Twenty-eight days?” she almost begged.

  “Hamptons Horizons is unique.”

  Georgette’s evasive response caused obvious concern for everyone in the room. Only Lex understood how long the program took because her mother had done it years ago.

  “How much time is spent in treatment?” Raising her voice, Vive squeezed at her wrist for an answer. “This was all your idea. Answer me.”

  “Three months…to start.” She saw fear in her face as she released the grip.

  “No fucking way. Fuck that and fuck you!”

  Rubbing her sore joint, she quickly banished the thought of Vive not going to rehab and asked, “Do you trust us?”

  Vive swore under her breath. “I hate you so much right now. I’ll never forgive you.”

  “You don’t mean that,” Taddy corrected her. “Answer the question. Do you trust us?”

  The room’s walls felt as though they were closing in on everyone. Nauseous, she didn’t think it was her pregnancy making her sick. No, it was the thought of not having Vive in her life anymore. Were they making a mistake?

  “Since we were kids, I’ve trusted you both.”

  She wouldn’t look at her, which hurt. Instead, Vive turned her attention back to Taddy who held the papers in her hands.

  Taddy handed her the pen. “Sign the papers.”

  “My stuff. I need to go home and pack first.” Pushing the document away, Vive gave the room a tight smile.

  “I did all that for ya, toots. That’s why I was late.” Thor earned her attention. Just his casual tone seemed to put her at ease. “Your luggage is out in the limo. I packed your best couture. You’re going to be one fashionable bitch at rehab.”

  Everyone, including Vive, giggled. Even Mr. Farnworth, who for as long as Lex had known him never smiled. The release of the stress leading up to the night, along with the unease of how this would go down, made it easier for Lex to breathe for the first time in days.

  “Thor, you did all that for me?”

  “You bet, baby doll. I want this for you. We all do.” Out of all of Vive’s friends, Thor Edwards, fund-raiser, safe-sex advocate, and veteran party boy who’d gone to rehab for crystal meth addiction years before, gunned for her rehabilitation.

  “Me going to Horizons means that much to you?” Her mouth opened to say more then closed without another word. Crouching, she buried her face in Hedda’s fur and rocked from side to side.

  “We joke about our booze, but this party has to end sometime, and that time is now. When you get back to the city, I’ll be dry right along with ya.” Thor nodded to reassure her. “Shit, if Marc Jacobs can get sober, so can you, Miss Thing. Think of all the weight we’ll lose by giving up those extra carbs.”

  Lex mouthed a thank you to Thor. He was flawless as always.

  Looking up, the worry in her eyes dilated her pupils. Vive asked, “What about Hedda? My furbaby is blind and deaf. She requires around-the-clock care. May I bring her with me?”

  “I’m sorry, no,” Georgette replied, holding her clipboard to her chest.

  “Hedda and I have never been apart. Not since she was a puppy. She’s all I have. Georgette, maybe you don’t understand, but she’s like a child to me. Please…” Tears streaked her face.

  Crap! Her decision was heading back toward no.

  Mrs. Farnworth got up from the table and wrapped her arms around her daughter. Kissing her on the forehead, she spoke in a low, loving voice, assuring her this was for the best.

  “I’m going to take the best care of your pooch.” Thor reached over and stroked Hedda’s back. “We’ll go to Doggie Day Care. I’ll take her shopping and bring her to visit. I promise.”

  Earlier, Lex had called everyone she knew in their circle to see who could take Hedda for such an extended period of time. Thor was the only one who’d agreed. He’d do anything for her, including taking care of a special-needs dog.

  “You’ll come see me on the farm?” Vive asked.

  “Every chance we get, we’ll be there.” She felt the weight coming off her, hoping Vive swung back to agreement.

  “Will you be mad at me, Lex? If I leave tonight, I won’t be in your wedding.”

  Kissing the top of her hand, she felt too choked up to speak, but she found her answer. “You’re giving us the greatest wedding gift Massimo and I could ever ask for.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Sobriety. Your health. I can’t think of anything I’d want more than to have this.”

  “More than a gift from Waterford Crystal?”

  With such a shallow comment, she sensed her humor return. “Way more than anything on my silly registry.”

  “Okay…”

  The room paused. Did they hear her correctly?

  “What did you say?” Taddy asked with a sound of hopefulness in her voice.

  “I’ll go. I can’t let you guys down anymore.” Grabbing the papers, she signed on the line. “More importantly, I have to do this for myself, right?”

  “That’s our girl.”

  Hugging for what felt like forever, she soon found herself downstairs with everyone, including Massimo and M2, waving goodbye. Georgette and Vive took off, heading north up Park Avenue toward the Long Island Expressway.

  She’d miss Vive and wished so much she could be able to share her wedding day with her and Massimo. Lex realized she didn’t want Vive to miss out on finding her own chance for a happily-ever-after. Knowing sobriety brought better times ahead helped. No one deserved to love themselves, and possibly a man, more than Viveca Farnworth.

  Upper West Side

  Frantically, Miguel stared at his parents. They hadn’t said one word after he’d told them he was gay. The silence about killed him.

  “I fought being gay for years, ’til college,” he added, hoping to get somewhere with them. A vulnerability he’d never experienced paralyzed him from talking any further.

  Here it comes. They’re going to disown me and ask us to leave.

  Neither parent spoke. Rather they sat there, speechless, staring at one another from across the dining room table. Noise from the air-conditioner filled the silence.

  Panicked, he turned from one to the other for a response; anything. The silence drove him insane. He’d do anything they wanted to stay in their lives, but he had to be true to himself. He’d spent too many years not celebrating himself with his family. Missing out on so much already, he didn’t want to carve that part of his life out from them.

  He swallowed, feeling the dryness from his tongue swelling in his mouth, and begged, “Say something.”

  “We’ve known,” his mother said as his father nodded. A tense laugh followed.

  “You have?” He released Blake’s hand and leaned forward in his chair in confusion.

  Inez gave him a ‘you stupid fool’ smile and confirmed, “Of course they have.”

  You knew they suspected and didn’t tell me. You brat.

  “Since you were a little boy, you were always special.” Attempting to stand, his father grabbed at his cane.

  “Too handso
me to not have taken a wife.” His mother went around the dining room table to help her husband rise.

  Miguel stood, as well. “Because I’m not married, you two assumed...”

  “Never assumed. We wanted you to tell us when you were ready,” his father said while he held his wife’s arm.

  Inez studied Blake and then Miguel. “We figured you’d tell us when you were comfortable. They never wanted to ask you something you didn’t want to share.”

  “Why?” He didn’t understand why no one had said anything. So much time had gone by.

  “Fear you’d stop coming home to visit.” Tears brimmed Inez’s eyes and she wiped them away. “They hoped you’d come out when you’d found someone special and wanted us to meet him.”

  “And you have Blake.” Part of his father’s paralyzed face stimulated to express happiness. He stared at his wife who admired her husband’s strength and held out his arms for a hug.

  “But, Papá, we are—”

  “Taking our relationship slow,” Blake interrupted. He leaned in, whispering, “Let them assume. Don’t make them worry.”

  He nodded as he walked past his chair toward his father. He wrapped his arms around his parents. Miguel hugged them as they cried. Laughter followed.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I always thought with our religion, you’d flip.”

  “God loves everyone.” She hugged him again. “This is your first time bringing anyone home to us. We’re honored to meet Blake.”

  “Are you two living together?” his father asked, returning to the head of the table.

  Shit, he didn’t think his parents would be one step ahead. He returned to his seat and sank in his chair.

  “We’re still working out the details,” Blake answered for him.

  Miguel’s mother sat across from him. She reached for his hand and asked, “Are you two going to get married? I hear a big white wedding is what the Manhattanite gays do these days.” Though she laughed, her expression read across her face as serious.

  His friend’s jaw dropped and his mouth hung open as the words ‘big white wedding’ reverberated in his own ears. He could only imagine how they sounded to Blake. Probably like an atomic bomb.

  Miguel reached for his friend’s hand to comfort him, sat down in his own chair and responded, “We haven’t talked about it.”

  “Speaking of weddings.” Blake paused for a minute. “Our friends Lex and Massimo are getting married later this week. We’d like you to come.”

  “Are they gay?” his father asked.

  “No, they are straight,” he replied, unable to believe Blake invited them to the wedding.

  “Sí. We would like to meet more of your friends.” His mother looked fondly at them.

  “Come on, let’s eat.” Inez urged them to finish their entrees.

  Love filled his heart, making him feel complete for the first time in his life. He embraced this feeling. It was as he’d always prayed for, the happiest moment he’d ever experienced. His folks had suspected. Why did I wait so long? He should’ve come out much sooner. He questioned if he’d told Blake how he’d felt about him ten years before, if that would’ve saved them both so much heartache. A decade had been wasted on missed opportunities to share his real identity with his family, and be with his best friend.

  I’m not going to waste another minute.

  As dinner came to an end, he raised his glass to a toast. “To our health.” He winked at his father. “To our love.” He patted Blake’s leg. “To our wealth and time to enjoy them all.”

  Once everyone sipped their drinks, his father added, “Miguel, we want to go to your exhibit.”

  “In Barcelona?” Miguel smiled.

  “We’re all going. We talked about it yesterday. The tickets are purchased,” Inez confirmed.

  He didn’t realize coming out of the closet also meant he’d be sharing every aspect of his life. He wasn’t used to this.

  Blake put his hand over his and squeezed it hard. His bright blue eyes sparkled in his happiness for his friend.

  “That would be great,” he said.

  Hand in hand, Blake left with Miguel at his side. They were almost giddy walking to the limo parked on Central Park West. Going over the night’s conversations, he thought Mr. Santana seemed naturally at ease with the whole thing, and so did his wife.

  “Now I know where you get your good looks from. Your dad is fucking hot. I mean, like really—”

  “Silencio.” Miguel balked as if he’d heard it his entire life. He held the car door open for him and swatted him on the butt as he got inside.

  “I’m so proud of you, Miguel.” He kissed him the second the sedan headed downtown. Tasting the night’s dinner on his lips, he said, “You were…amazing.”

  “Muchas gracias. I couldn’t have done it without you guiding me.”

  “Puhlease. My help wasn’t needed. You had their approval before we even walked in the door.” He thought about how frustrated Miguel must be with himself to have waited until he was almost thirty to come out of the closet to them. What a jackass, he chuckled to himself.

  “Did you have to invite them to Lex’s wedding? Won’t Birdie mind?”

  “Who do you think gave me the idea? Birdie told me to make sure your family had an invite. My parents are coming, too.” He felt a warm tingle inside knowing his parents would meet the Santanas. The friendly introduction only took ten years.

  “This seems too easy.” Miguel grinned, showing his perfect teeth. His pink tongue came out to lick his lips.

  Lord, he dripped sex when he was in a good mood.

  “Or maybe it’s from going with the flow. Isn’t that what you always say?”

  Lightness replaced the earlier dread in Blake’s chest watching the Santana’s love their son. The night couldn’t have gone any better. “How does it feel to finally be out to your family?”

  “One word: relieved. I made being gay a bigger deal than it really is. My parents always assumed... After all these years, I cannot believe they didn’t ask me.”

  He hoped Miguel might one day get it. He wasn’t quite there yet, which frustrated the crap of out of him. “Why should they have to? This goes back to what I mentioned last night. You gotta tell people what you want in order to get it. You can’t just hope.”

  “Sí, I’m getting that now.” Kissing him on his neck, he brushed his fingers along his cheek in a slow caress causing him to giggle and turn in to him. “That citrus smell of yours drives me wild. I love it. I always have.”

  Miguel’s lips, followed by his tongue on his neck along with the compliments in his ear, made his cock hard.

  “The cologne is called Happy by Clinique.”

  “Perfecto name. Whenever I catch a whiff, that’s how I feel. You make me happy, Mr. Morgan.” Miguel unzipped his fly and pulled out his cock. Stroking it slowly, almost in tantric motions, he said, “I want you.”

  “See, you’re getting better at telling people what you want. First, you said you wanted me in your bed.” He held onto his beefy right arm with his left as he licked his fingers and glided his thumb over the head of his dick. Catching his breath short, he continued, “Then you said you wanted to come out to your family, and you did. Now tell me what you want to do next.” Lord, he prayed Miguel would say he wanted to get fucked. His desire to drill his friend’s Latin ass grew strong. Could he get his dominant alpha to bottom for him?

  “Have you given more thought to us?”

  Like a splash of cold water hitting him, he sat up. Losing the sexy moment, he slid his cock back in his pants and zipped up. “Indeed. It’s on my mind. Meeting your parents tonight helped me understand you a bit more.”

  “What’s there not to understand?” Suspiciously, Miguel glared at him for taking his cock away from his affections.

  “You’re not easy to figure out.” Crossing his legs, he tapped his loafer’s heel against the door’s armrest. He hoped the conversation wouldn’t avalanche into an argument a
fter having such a perfect dinner.

  “I’m a simple guy with simple needs.” His friend’s strong hands grabbed both of his knees. “Spread ‘em.” From east to west, Miguel split Blake’s legs wide.

  “Simple, my ass.” He shook his head, trying to close his legs. “This week’s brought us closer together.” Lord, he is gonna fuck me in the car. He’s going to keep fucking me ‘til I give in and move in with him. I can’t give in to what he’ll really want. I won’t share someone again. Your past only proves that possibility is too great to risk.

  “Sí, very much so.” Miguel dug his hands into his waistline. His long fingers reached for his cock.

  He tried to push Miguel’s hands away. “These experiences…we’ll never forget.”

  Determined, Miguel wrapped his hands around his nuts. “Don’t you see? We belong together. We always have.” His friend spoke with certainty. “Give me your cock, boy, and that ass, too. Now.”

  He covered his mouth to stifle an erotic howl when Miguel got to his knees, pulling his slacks to his ankles.

  “Move in with me. Tell me you want that, too.” Taking his cock in his mouth, Miguel hummed to himself. Sucking hard, going down and coming back up on his shaft, he kept his black gaze fixated on his. When he didn’t reply, he scraped his teeth along the tip of his cock in a playful way. “Papi, answer me.”

  “I…” Ever since their moment at Club Dupree, Blake had tried to imagine how they’d be as a couple. Their private moments together felt as pure as New York City snow, but what about a month or a year down the road? Once his rose-colored glasses wore off, would Miguel’s feelings change in time? More importantly, if he told him what he really wanted, monogamy forever, would he agree?

  The limo turned onto Miguel’s block.

  “What’s that detective doing here?” he asked, noticing him in front of the building.

  Miguel zipped up his pants. He opened the door the second the Mercedes came to a stop and helped him out.

  Smoking a cigarette, Detective Shiloh Benson sat on the lobby stairs.