Awaken Me
Six
MY DAYS QUICKLY BECAME LOST.
I wasn’t really keeping up with the time or day, but I knew that today was Thursday. I’d been here a week now. Iva sat cross-legged, reading a magazine. I was lying on a white shabby-chic sort of couch in Rosemarie’s glass room, watching the koi swim happily under my couch. Why couldn’t I be a fish? Fish had no worries and no complications. Rosemarie’s room was still the same as the first time I came in here. Big flower arrangements, lilies and orchids. Her desk was still a disarray of unorganized papers. Her large windows that looked outside were my only glance at sunlight. And, of course, the glass floor. It finally hit me that the smell in this room was sweet, reminding me of Sweet Tarts candy.
It was hard not to think about everything I had learned and was still learning. I was lucky to not have had nightmares about the Rogues who took me, but I dwelled on that one memory I had about them, that memory and Alec. I wanted to talk about everything I was feeling, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to raise suspicion with Iva of what my feelings could be. Especially because I didn’t know how I felt about Alec. Something about him was so familiar and comfortable. He seemed to heighten my anger issues, and bring out the child in me. But I couldn’t deny these feelings no matter how infuriating he was.
Since the night when Alec stayed with me, I hadn’t seen him much. I wanted to ask Iva where he was, but my own pride got in the way and I was left with curiosity killing me. Alec wouldn’t leave for long, would he? And why would he leave at all?
My attention was drawn toward the blue sea glass door; it opened and Rose, my mother, walked in. Her willowy figure was draped in a lovely opal floor-length dress, made of a shimmery material. I still wondered what made her important to this community. I hadn’t asked, but I was sure she was someone important. She casually glided ever so gracefully to her desk. She began looking through her papers.
"Have you ladies made your decision yet?" Rose asked. At that moment I remembered that I was supposed to make a decision on whether or not I would be a part of a Masquerade ball the committee was putting together. My parents were also very much involved in event planning. Rose thought Iva and I would be good candidates to help decorate. Decorating wasn’t my strong suit. It bored me to tears. Even in Florida, Derek’s family was invited to the most elite of parties or events and being a part of them didn’t satisfy me. The only thing I liked about these big events was that I got to play dress up.
“Well...," was all that came out of my lips.
Rose chuckled at my response. “I think it would be nice for you to be involved in something where you will be around others your age. Maybe you will meet an eligible young man."
Iva laughed at this statement with a smirk on her lips.
“I’m not exactly interested in anyone here," I said, a small lie because I was attracted to Alec. And Marcus was cute. But at that moment I figured my days for a serious relationship should be put on hiatus.
"Sure...," Iva said sarcastically, as she rolled onto her side.
“I’m not. I’m done with men." I said sternly, but even I thought it sounded utterly ridiculous. I knew as well as Iva that I couldn’t be done with men.
“Aimee, one bad experience can't cancel out all future prospects," Rose said, and frankly she was beginning to annoy me.
“Yeah, yeah." I wished I could be alone right then.
“Has Alec returned yet?" Rose asked, catching my eye. She hid a glimmer of a smile.
My eyebrows rose up. I was in fact wondering where he was and happy she brought it up.
“I’m not sure when he'll be back. He didn't tell me where he was going," Iva said.
I sat up and pushed my long hair out of my face.
"Did he go search for the girl he loved?" I asked, remembering he told me about how he lost the woman he loved, and I didn’t think it would be a far off idea if he had gone looking for her. The thought of it made me a little sad. I wanted someone to love me like that, enough to go to the end of the world to find me.
They both looked at me with such confusion on their faces. I instantly felt stupid for saying that out loud. There goes my speaking without thinking again.
"Aimee, where did you hear that?" Iva still had that ‘what are you talking about?’ expression on her face.
"He told me that he once loved a girl and she was taken from him," I said, digging my own grave and feeling bad about telling them something he told me. Maybe he didn’t want to share that info with them. Iva raised her eyebrows at me and Rose was glancing at the clock on the coffee table.
“Oh, look at the time! I have a meeting in ten minutes. Aimee, you should take your place among the court function community with Iva. Planning the last minute details should be exciting for this masquerade ball."
I was thankful that Rose changed the subject. The ball would be fun, needless to say. I just wasn’t interested in the planning part. Rose gracefully left the room.
"What are you going to wear?" I asked as I sank into the couch.
"Not sure yet. Do want to go shopping for a dress?"
“Now, that sounds like something I really want to do. Can we go now?” I said. My eyes lit up as I rose off the couch in excitement. Would this mean going above ground?
"Let’s go," she said, smiling, reveling her fangs.
I grabbed her hands and pulled her to her feet.
We never did leave the community. All the shops were underground. I was a bit disappointed. Actually, I was more than disappointed, I was downright distraught. What designers could they possibly have? My answer came as we entered a really nice store; all kinds of designer clothes hung on racks everywhere I looked. It had the feel of BCBG, with how large the store was, yet it was cluttered from every angle.
“HEAVEN." I said happily. A little vampire woman came over to us; she seemed eager for us to spend money or maybe she was just bored. Maybe it was both. Which reminded me. “Iva, do they except Visa cards?”
“You of all people should not worry; now shop!” Iva said.
Iva didn’t waste any time; she was taking dresses off the rack and placing them in the woman’s hands. I was stunned as I watched in a trance. This was clearly Iva's element. The poor woman, she was so little that I wasn’t sure if she’d be able to see over the dresses. I held my laughter in as she waddled to the fitting room.
I spotted a red floor-length dress made of silk. It was the same dress I wore the night of my fast departure from Derek. Iva, as if sensing my uneasiness, came over to me. She glanced around and quickly spotted my nemesis.
“The dress did look really nice on you," she said as she tilted her head.
"It really did. I searched so many stores for a dress for that occasion.... Do you want to get married?" I asked. Iva’s facial expression became comical, skeptical even.
"I haven't ever really thought about it. I guess if I met someone I could love. That’s one problem with living in a community your whole life. You grow up with the guys that live here, too."
"Yeah. I could see how that could be a problem. Did I have a boyfriend before I was taken?"
Iva hesitated before answering me. “Not exactly a boyfriend—he was a bit more. You were in love, both of you. Ever since he joined us, you and he were always together … well, I was always there, too."
"Joined us? Where did he come from?"
"His family was seized and they were killed by the Rogues. He managed to escape and was found shortly after.”
“Who was he?" I asked.
“I don't think I should be the one to tell you."
I almost protested but my eyes caught someone outside the window. Alec. Iva noticed him, too. Alec came toward us, grinning.
"So you have returned and may I ask where you went?" Iva asked slyly.
Shrugging and looking like his usual Greek god self, Alec smiled at us.
"I just needed to get out for a bit. What are you ladies shopping for?"
"Dr
esses for the ball, of course." Iva said smoothly. She wasn't flirting, but they were so comfortable with each other that a little bit of jealousy swept through me. Deciding I didn’t want to feel like that, I turned my attention to the dress rack on the other side of the room.
My mood shot up quickly as I found a dress that I liked. It was a dark red, halter-style dress with a nice cleavage line, knee length, and tight. Yes, I had fallen in love.
In my peripheral vision, I could see Alec approaching. He cleared his throat. I was feeling childish, and I didn’t know why, so I ignored him. My mood changed at that point. I wasn’t mad at Alec, but I couldn't justify the way I felt for him. I think that’s what made me mad, and when he was gone, he left me dangerously curious as to where he was. Either way it wasn’t an excuse.
Running a hand through his brown locks he stepped closer to me. Just being near caused an eruption of butterflies. Calm down, I told myself. I was being extremely stupid.
"Is it safe to assume that you’re also going to the ball?" His eyes were ice grey; I could easily fall into his smoldering gaze.
Instead I turned to admire the dress once more. I saw a flash in Alec’s eyes as he looked at the dress.
"Yes, I am going. With Iva!" I said stiffly. Alec shifted so I could pass him. I was careful not to touch him or look at him. Being so close already was making me struggle not to just melt.
“Are you angry with me?" Alec’s deep Italian accent caressed my skin.
His question took me off guard. I wanted to avoid answering it. It wasn’t exactly anger. I was more annoyed. The more important question was why? He didn’t do anything to make me treat him poorly. Ah, the joy of being a woman and an emotional wreck.
“Why would you think that?" I asked; the sharp tone was load and clear.
He moved his arm to block me from walking past him.
“I don’t know, maybe because you look hostile." He was clearly amused.
"What are you getting at exactly?" My voice was shaking slightly. My mood was at a peak. Alec looked cautious, sensing it too, and once again he studied my eyes.
"Why do you keep studying my eyes like I’m an experiment?" I snapped, nearly dropping the dress.
“Have you looked at your eyes when you’re mad?"
"Why would I do that? I already know what color they are," I said, crossing my arms, while glaring angrily at him.
“This is the second time; I could have sworn your eyes changed colors. Hazel to a, well, I don’t know what color it was. It happened too fast." He was still looking into my eyes.
"Okay, stop. My eyes do not change colors! And, excuse me, but I have a dress to try on." I pushed his arm out of the way and he grabbed my waist, turning me around. My breathing was staggered, mixed with excitement. Everything he did was spontaneous; I couldn’t read his mysterious ways.
“Can you just calm down. I wanted to ask you something." Alec’s expression softened and he started to look like the younger Alec from my memory.
"And that is?" I asked with a hard expression. Iva came out of the dressing room looking at us curiously as she came closer. Perfect timing. What a cliffhanger!
"Wow, now that’s sexy!” she said, looking at the red dress I held. “You’ll most likely have a few dates after they see you in that!" She smiled happily. Alec, on the other hand, well if he had had color in his flesh, it would’ve been gone.
"Don't you agree, Alec?" Iva asked sweetly.
His lips went into a hard line. "Maybe she’d get some dates, if she could manage to be nice and less moody," Alec said. I smacked him hard on his shoulder, which caught him by surprise.
"It doesn’t matter what you think, because I may be moody with you, but I most definitely will not be toward an actual prospect!" I said passionately. His eyes flashed, and I then regretted being so cruel.
"Okay, so we have lots to do, Aimee."
Iva began pushing me over to the register while dismissing Alec in that polite way of hers, called the “nod and smile.”
Sitting cross legged, I was irritated beyond words to express and baffled by the job I was asked to do. How Iva and I ended up on the committee was beyond me. We didn't even agree to it. Yet here we were in the dinner hall setting up the decorations. I was grouchily glaring at all the people scurrying around. They put me in charge of the flowers and the room was massive. I began attempting to assort and put carnations together, white and red mixed with some kind of black flower. This was a cruel punishment; my fingers hurt. I was originally assigned to the balloons with Iva, but we were playing with the helium so much that Zara, the gal who is the head of the committee, got annoyed and sent me here to put the flowers together.
“Hi, are you Aimee?" a skinny, curly red-headed vampire girl stood before me; she seemed to be one of those people who would be a loner and was uncomfortable talking to people she didn’t know, or any kind of person in general. She dressed in ordinary jeans and a T-shirt that was too big for her.
"It depends on what she is needed for," I said grumpily.
"Oh, mum, Zara wanted me to help you fix the flower arrangements."
Fix? I wasn’t fooling anybody with my lack of creativity, but still Zara was getting on my nerves; she should be grateful that I was doing this at all.
"Okay," I said. I was a bit offended and wanted to leave, but my chances of escape were as slim as this red headed girl helping me with fashion advice.
We sat in silence as I copied her lead in rearranging the flowers. I had to give this girl credit. She was very creative. Wanting to stretch my legs a bit, I stood and backed away from the red head. She glanced up at me, confused.
"I will be right back, bathroom," I said. I was very aware that she knew I was lying as I walked toward Iva and the hot man next to her. What I wasn’t expecting was that Zara would tap me on the shoulder. Her bleached-blonde hair was cropped short and slick. Her sharp features would be pretty if she wasn’t so arrogant and bossy. Grey eyes narrowed on me, clipboard in hand, foot tapping.
"Where are you going?" she asked in her annoying bossy voice.
"To the bathroom." I lied.
"Sure, the bathroom is in the opposite direction."
"Thanks, I didn’t know where it was. I will be going now." Quickly turning to leave her examining eyes, I heard her “tsk” at me.
"Just because the Leader of our world is your mother doesn't mean I have to like you! I plan on having the ball perfect and the same with further events. If that includes you being kicked out of here, then I will personally escort you!"
What a witch! But, the good thing was she told me why my mother was important! My mother was the leader of this community. It wasn’t a surprise.
“I’d like to see you try." I said, in a snarky voice.
"Things can be arranged." She then made a note on her clipboard and headed off to go yell at someone else.
Mimicking her last facial expression while turning my head, I almost ran into someone. Brushing my hair out of my face, I was standing in front of the guy Iva had been speaking to. He was very nice looking, with his dark clean-cut hairstyle and his boyish face.
"Oh, sorry," I said.
"It’s all right. I’m Anthony; I was just talking to your friend over there." His voice was smooth and confident and my smile broadened.
"And what were you two talking about?" I put some “Aimee charm” on.
"Well, you, of course. She told me you’re single?"
"That depends," I said, smiling.
"Do you have an escort to the ball?" He was pretty forward, but it was rather nice.
"Why, are you asking me?" I asked, tilting my head.
"It depends on what you would say." His half smile excited me.
"Yes."
"Yes you have an escort or yes you will go with me?"
"Yes, I will go with you," I said.
He smiled. "I will meet you in front of the coffee shop around eight." He lig
htly touched my arm.
“Okay," I said. He walked away just as Alec entered the room. Why does he always appear out of nowhere?
My smile faltered a bit. Luckily he didn’t stop to chat; he went to see Iva and they went into an immediate discussion.
Deciding to go back to the red-headed girl so Zara wouldn’t have a coronary, I sat down in higher spirits. The girl just shook her head at me, clearly disapproving. I wasn’t going to let her kill my buzz.
After being slave driven all day with setting up the room, Iva and I were finally free women. It was about five o’clock. So, Iva and I headed back to my room to get ready for tonight.
The court was pretty quiet as we hastily made our way to my room; my footsteps echoed on the granite floor. I could sense Iva watching; glancing up at her I rose my eyebrows.
“What is it?” I asked, laughing.
“So I’m assuming you told Anthony yes?" Iva asked.
"I did. He seems nice and he’s pretty good looking. How did you know?"
“He asked me about you and I could tell that he was going to ask you.… Alec asked me to go with him," she said with a giggle. I almost choked on my spit at her statement. Why didn't he ask me? That thought caught me off guard. I was desperately trying to conceal my frown.
"That should be fun, we can double," I said as calmly as I could.
"Are you okay with that?" she asked.
"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" I asked, glancing at her.
I wondered if she could hear my thoughts, because right then they were screaming. I was trying to bury them. I didn’t own Alec, let alone have a reason for my feelings.
"I’m just making sure, because if you have any … thoughts, or feelings for him, we can switch dates tonight." She was trying to get a hint of jealousy from me, but I wasn’t about to let her know my true emotions. Mostly because I didn’t even know what they were, or if I just had a simple crush. I didn’t want to ruin the evening.
"Listen, we are going to have fun and if this Anthony guy is a creeper, then please rescue me," I said. She agreed to that.
Seven
IVA LOOKED STUNNING IN HER pale gold, floor-length dress, but then again, she always did look nice. I straightened her hair for her and did her eye make up like a mask with gold and black accents; mine was red and gold for a more dramatic feel. Iva helped give me soft curls with her new curler, and they made my hair look fresh and bouncy.
The dress showed just the right amount of cleavage, thanks to my fabulous bra. I sort of felt like my dress choice might not have been the best. I felt very risqué in it. Iva kept reassuring me that I looked sexy, not skanky. Yet I had a bit of regret for wearing this dress, and it was too late to change now as we left my room to make our way to the coffee shop. I kept pulling on the sides of the dress.
“Stop, you’re going to stretch the dress. You look great!” Iva said, with her usual eyebrow raised at me. I stopped messing with the dress and gave a sigh.
Anthony was already there as we approached. He openly checked me out with a look of "he likes what he sees." Iva, standing next to me, was pretending to choke to cover her laughter. She elbowed me in the side.
"You look great." Anthony said, clearly pleased. His black tux went nicely with his dark hair. He held his mask in his hand.
Coming around the corner, wearing his mask and all, Alec caught my eye as usual. His smoky grey suit looked dead sexy on him. He wore his mask. This made him even more mysterious.
Alec grinned at Iva and gestured for her to take his arm, she slipped hers through. I eyed her fingers as she placed them softly on his forearm. I wanted my hand there, not hers. I quickly brushed those feelings aside as I came closer to Anthony.
Anthony did the same gesture to me and I happily took it; I could have sworn Alec’s lips twitched. Or maybe I was just hoping to get a rise out of Alec. Anthony and I followed behind them. I resisted the urge to kick Alec for ignoring me.
As we approached the entrance, it was claustrophobically crowded with people trying to get in. I noticed Zara right away; she stood close to the door, with that same clipboard in her hand. She, however, looked gorgeous, regardless of how much she bothered me. I passed her, smiling; even though she wore a mask I could feel the glaring of her eyes. Did she ever stop being so controlling? I think not.
We entered the masquerade ball. And, to my surprise, it looked amazing. The light source came from torches that hung on the walls and candlelit chandeliers that dropped from the ceiling. I was happy that the red head helped fix the flowers because now they really looked nice as they sat in the middle of the tables as centerpieces, as well as lining the entrance.
“Not bad!” Iva said, also gesturing toward the flowers.
Snarky, I said, “Yeah. Thanks to the red head.”
Iva smiled. “Good thing!”
People were dancing on the floor and the DJ was playing a pretty great remix of a techno song. It almost felt like a rave. Minus the glow sticks. I was surprised all around by the turn out. Well, considering that this was probably the most exciting event to happen in this underworld cage, I guess I shouldn’t have been all that surprised.
We picked a table and placed our drinks there to mark our territory. I took a sip of my punch then eyed the good-looking man next to me, Alec. I felt a bit guilty; I was here with Anthony but was totally ogling Alec. I’m a free woman now, I thought. I was able to look at whatever or whoever I wished.
"Do you want to dance?" I asked Anthony as excitement poured through my body.
“Do you want me to lead?” he asked laughing.
I noticed that his accent was barely there. His eyebrows rose at me asking him first to dance, but it didn’t matter. I wanted to dance my crazy life away.
He took my hand and led me to the floor. I glanced over my shoulder at Iva. She just shook her head and shrugged. Alec stood next to her gripping his glass tightly with a stony expression. Clearly, he didn’t like this arrangement. I felt a tiny bit guilty about making Alec jealous, but that feeling soon passed. It made me happy. I was evil deep down and I liked it.
Finding a spot on the floor was hard; everyone and their mothers were most likely here surrounding me on the dance floor.
Pushing the nonexistent space, I didn’t hesitate to start dancing. I really loved the song. Laughing a bit, I thought to myself, All I need is some glow sticks.
One thing I did like was that Anthony had rhythm, which made it easy for me to really get into the song. We moved well together, it was getting hot and sweaty, and Anthony was getting a little too comfortable with me. His hands started to slide down to my rear end; I kept moving his hands back up. He apparently wasn’t getting the hint. Next thing I knew was that his lips were at my neck, kissing it softly. His fangs brushed my skin, sending a thrill of adrenalin through me.
I wasn’t sure if I wanted to kiss him, but, hey, it wouldn’t hurt to have a little fun. Bringing my face closer to his, my lips inches away, everything around me went into slow motion; the music was muffled as I was anticipating the kiss. The kiss never happened. Firm hands on my shoulder pulled me back.
What the heck? I was spun around.
Alec's eyes had a fire in them, one I hadn’t seen before. It scared me, actually. His eyes just continued to glare at me. Cowering under his gaze, I did not want him to disapprove. But that quickly vanished as it was replaced with burning rage. He wasn’t my father, after all.
Anthony was equally as outraged as I. But Alec would win the battle if they were to fight it out. Even though Anthony was built the same, like a tennis player, there was something about Alec. He was fierce.
"Can I help you?" Anthony asked, annoyed at the interruption.
"Aimee, I think it’s time to leave," Alec said, full of authority.
Just who did he think he was? The anger started to bubble within me.
“I don’t want to leave. I’m having a good time." I said with attitude as I pl
aced my hands on my hips.
“I don't think you understand, I’m not asking, I’m telling you!" His Italian accent turned dangerous and smooth.
He was embarrassing me. Iva came to the rescue as promised, not from Anthony, but from Alec. Iva grasped my hand as she guided me through the crowd.
The hallway was deserted. My arms were crossed as I was trying to calm myself. I paced back and forth; Iva stood there watching me. I looked like a crazy person. If smoke was able to come out my ears, it would be fire.
"What is his problem? How can I ever see Anthony after tonight?" I said, with my voice shaking.
"I think Anthony will still make contact with you. But not when Alec is around," Iva said.
"What is his problem?" I asked. I was still furious.
"Isn’t it obvious?" she asked.
I didn’t know what she was talking about other than him being over protective and serious about everything. I didn’t need a knight in shining armor!
"He treats me like I’m a child." I said, exasperated. The smooth, less-angered Italian accent answered me.
“That’s because you’re acting like one," Alec said behind me.
I didn’t want to see him. So, instead, I kept my eyes on Iva.
“I’m going back to my room! Your work is done here, Alec; you can leave now!"
I could sense him still standing there, so I decide to escort myself. Taking my heels off and holding them, I began my walk of shame to my room. My whole night cut in half. I heard soft footsteps behind me and, of course, Alec was suddenly standing next to me.
"What part of ‘I don’t want to see you’ don't you get!?" I said, as I raised my voice.
Alec put himself in front of me as if to stop me from walking. His mask was off and he tried to look at me, leveling his eyes with mine. I averted my eyes. I was acting truly childish now.
"Anthony was … well ... he doesn’t respect you! And I don’t want you to be taken advantage of!" That Italian voice of his was soft and almost sweet under these circumstances. I glared at him coldly. He wasn’t about to get any mercy from me.
"I don’t care. Maybe I want to be taken advantage of. I need to have fun and act like a normal person!" I crossed my arms so I wouldn’t punch him. I was so HOT.
"I didn't mean to embarrass you."
"Again, I don’t care! Just leave me alone. Go find Iva, since she is your date tonight! Stop worrying about me and maybe you could have some fun!" My voice grew louder with each word I spoke.
"She isn’t my date Aimee, we’re friends. She and I don't care for each other like that," he said with a reassuring voice. But I didn’t need to be reassured. I needed to be left alone.
The court was vacant as I continued to walk. Everyone young was still at the ball and enjoying the night. I could still be enjoying myself. I could hear the fountain bubbling near me. I stopped and turned too fast, and suddenly, I was in Alec’s face. Clearly, I’d startled him.
"Why are you telling me this, Alec? I’m not upset about you going with Iva. I didn’t even question you about it." I poked his chest with my finger.
He thought about it for a moment. "I’m telling you because I thought…"
"You thought what?" my eyes became narrow and focused on him.
"I don't know. I was wrong, I guess." He started backing away from me.
"You always do that! Would you just spit it out? You weren’t at a loss for words with Anthony!"
I waited for him to say something, anything. But he just looked at me with such intensity that I would’ve kissed him if I weren’t so mad. I realized he was trying to seduce me. And even though he was very good looking, with wavy brown hair, ice grey eyes, and perfectly proportioned features, it wasn’t going to work. I felt that electricity come alive again. But he didn’t say anything. Not a word.
"That’s what I thought!" I said, as flipped my hair back. “Goodnight, Alec with no last name!” I began walking again.
"Aimee...," he said as he roughly touched my arm and spun me around. He pulled me close to his body. I felt his warmth as he held me close. My breathing stopped and my heart began to beat at a faster pace. He had taken me by surprise. My senses became alive, tingles and butterflies overflowed my body.
“My last name is Attias.” Not that his last name mattered much to me at that moment.
All I could think of now were his lips. For a moment longer, he held my gaze. I felt a different type of fire in me. It was a hunger. I wanted him. I didn’t blink, too afraid I would miss a move. He leaned his face closer to mine. I felt his breath as if to form a kiss. My heart was fluttering; I was anxious.
"How do you not remember?" he asked so softly. His breath felt sweet against my face, so close. I kept my eyes open to answer his question.
"Remember what?" I said without breathing.
"Remember this."
His lips met mine, full of passion, heat, and strength, his warm lips didn’t hesitate or falter. They felt wonderful. That fire burning within me spread to the rest of my body and while it started out soft, that fire became fierce. My body instantly responded. He pushed me against the wall, holding me captive. I felt like my heart would explode.
He pulled away, watching me. Leaving my eyes closed still, I tried to catch my breath.
"What was that?" I asked, whispering. He was breathing heavy, too.
He looked frustrated and backed away from me. His eyes still held that intensity and passion. I wanted more.
Surprising myself, I told him something so not like me.
"I … should be going now." So many emotions filled me. I had never experienced this before. I was terrified. What was this, this fire that is deep within my soul? Being awakened?
We were just arguing, how did we end up kissing? I’m supposed to be in control! Not him! My pride was wallowing within me.
Turning my back to Alec, I began walking toward my room, a bit shaken.
"Do you want me to walk you to your room?" he asked.
I paused as I looked back at him; I thought it would be better if I went alone. With the way I was feeling, I shouldn’t have him with me. I needed time to think, think about what I felt. Was this just lust or something deeper? Was I even ready or capable to trust?
“I can manage,” was all I said, not looking back to see his expression.