Scars and Songs

  My blood pressure soared; I could feel it surging faster through my veins. Sweat was breaking out over my cheeks and across my forehead. Weren’t these people supposed to be trained in containing criminals? “What happened five months ago?” I asked through clenched teeth.

  Taking a deep breath, Ramos’ partner stepped forward to answer, “He was admitted to the Sans de Barron Hospice; he was terminal. His doctors had given him only a few weeks to live. He’d been comatose and unresponsive for weeks, and then sometime last Sunday, he just walked out of the hospice.” He gave Grace a curious look, “Am I right in saying that you had been living at the hospice with your brother Jacob for approximately six months?”

  Grace nodded and leaned into me further. I didn’t even think she realized what she was doing, but thank God she was doing it, because it stopped me from pummeling these two cowards to a bloody pulp.

  “There must be a mistake though. The man that attacked me, there was no way that he could have been that strong and dying of some disease at the same time. Maybe the guy stole the real Carl Sumpton’s identity or something,” Grace offered.

  The detectives both nodded their heads, and then Ramos cleared his throat and continued, “When a perpetrator of a crime of this magnitude is arraigned, the District Attorney on the case usually requests a temporary order of protection to be issued to the victim. This is your copy of the order.” He placed a paper on the table from his briefcase in front of Grace. “I wanted to say that I’m sure this matter will be resolved soon.”

  That’s when I snapped. “And you think a piece of paper will stop this lunatic from trying to hurt Grace again? What should she do if he comes up to her when she’s walking down the street? Should she say, hold on while I look in my purse for the piece of paper that will stop you?”

  Grace grabbed my knee and her touch sent an electric current straight to my freaking dick. The feeling was so strong that I almost jumped out of this damn skin. Our eyes collided and she held my stare for a moment, “Stop it, Shane. I’m sure they will do everything they can to contain him again.” I knew she meant to calm me down, but anger tore through my veins, as my protectiveness over her was all I could see.

  Then she looked at both the detectives, “Thank you both for coming here and telling me instead of calling me on the phone. I appreciate the paperwork and everything. Is there anything that you think I could do in the meantime, while you…um…work on this matter?”

  Her face was stoic. Like she didn’t care. That’s different, wouldn’t most girls cry and whine about being afraid? Yeah, they would.

  “We understand your anxiety, Mr. Maxton. For the next twenty-four hours, there will be a uniformed officer sitting outside this apartment in a patrol car. Just be aware and keep your eyes open, Miss Taylor.”

  After a few more words, Grace walked the detectives to the front door and locked the deadbolt. She stood there staring at it, so I walked up behind her and laid my hands on her shoulders and pulled her towards me. She freaked. She moved away and shoved my hands off of her, “I’m fine, Shane,” she snapped.

  “Yeah, well you definitely will be, because Conner and I are staying here with you and Lea until that asshole is behind bars again,” I said as I left her in the hallway. I was freaking livid. I should have broken the guy’s neck when I had the chance. I stormed down the hallway and locked myself in the bathroom. I needed to calm the hell down before I found that worthless bag of flesh and ended his existence. “I’m taking a shower! Do not leave this building without me!”

  “Make sure you scrub yourself real well, Shane! That perfume you were wearing when you came here last night stinks!” She screamed, slamming her bedroom door.

  Where the hell did that crap come from? Oh damn. Perfume from last night? Well, fuck me, isn’t that interesting. Grace was acting jealous.

  I regulated the temperature in the shower with a big-ass grin on my face and jumped in. All thoughts of tearing Carl Sumpton to shreds were gone because the images of Grace’s words filled up my mind. I heard a door slam somewhere in the house and an icy blast of water hit me full in the face. I let out a startled scream, okay so it wasn’t one of my more masculine moments, but it felt like someone was pouring ice cubes and glass over me.

  She either flushed a toilet somewhere or she was using the hot water. On freaking purpose! Grabbing a towel and wrapping it loosely around my waist, I jumped out of the shower and ran through the house looking for her, dripping a stream of water everywhere I stepped.

  The basement light was on. I could tell by the illumination that seeped through the bottom of the door to downstairs when I looked in the kitchen. I flew down the stairs, almost losing my damn towel, and shoved open the laundry room door and charged at her. Only stopping right before my body collided with hers, our lips but an inch apart. “You really need to do your laundry right now? What? Are you mad at me for wanting to stay here? Ticked off because I might actually care if you are okay? What? Will it ruin your high expectations of me?” I cupped her face in both my hands. I could feel her heart pounding against my chest and the heaviness of her breaths. “Or, maybe Grace, you want me here every freaking bit as much I want to be here and that scares the shit out of you?”

  Her eyes traveled down to my towel and rose slowly over the skin of my stomach and chest; lingered over my tattoos and right into my eyes. Her pulse sped faster. I felt it beat little drum solos beneath my fingertips. Her mouth was about to lie to me, but her eyes were telling me the truth.

  “Nothing about you scares me, Shane. I just don’t want you getting the wrong idea about us.” Why the hell is she pushing me away?

  “I know, I know. There is no us. I’m not talking about staying here to...Grace, you really think so little of me to think that I want to stay here so I could try to...forget it, Grace.” I shook my head and walked to the stairs. “I’ll break down your walls, Grace Taylor. You aren’t going to know what the fuck hit you,” I said, continuing up the stairs. Then I took the coldest shower anyone has ever taken in the history of the universe. And it didn’t help me one damn bit.

  I left her alone for almost three hours, sat my ass down on her couch and stretched my feet up on her coffee table. I caught up with my favorite television shows and watched two episodes of Sons of Anarchy and two episodes of Family Guy.

  Then I made some grilled cheese sandwiches and brought them down to her as a peace offering. “I thought you’d be starving by now,” I said as I knocked on the laundry room door.

  She lifted her head off her arms and smiled. “More bored out of my skull than hungry, but thank you.”

  I matched her smile. “You know, Grace, you don’t have to stay down here. I promise you I won’t bite,” I smirked. “Well, unless you ask me to,” I teased to lighten the mood.

  “Shut up,” she smirked back at me. “I’m sorry about before,” she said digging into her sandwich. “I guess I’m just a little freaked out by the whole Carl Sumpton thing.” The girl was blatantly lying to me and it was killing me to know why.

  I shrugged, playing at her game. “Do you remember him at the hospice?”

  “Not at all,” she said, hiding her mouth with her hand because she was chewing. “He did look familiar, but not from anywhere I could pinpoint.” She threw up her hands. “There were so many people there. I used to play my guitar for Jake every night, well, up until the last few days. There was always a different crowd of people surrounding the door listening. But if he was comatose, he shouldn’t have known anything about me. I barely left Jake’s room, let alone walk into other patient’s rooms.” She stuffed her face with the sandwich, it was freaking adorable.

  “Maybe he thought your playing stinks,” I said taking her empty plate.

  “Probably. I mean, I am almost as horrible as you!” She was laughing, no trace of the tears from that morning or fear of Carl Sumpton. Her strength and non-whininess was kind of non-girlie. There was something different about Grace Taylor that made me so intrigued. Maybe
that’s what these feeling were, and not just the simple fact of her looking like Selah. I just couldn’t help wondering what the hell she was hiding from me. If only I could put my lips to hers, I might be able to gauge her feelings a little more. If I still had my wings, I’d know everything through her lips. Not having my angel abilities sucked, but being human and not in control of human emotions was worse.

  The shrill buzzing of the dryer echoed through the small room. Grace didn’t even flinch from the startling sound. She just sauntered over to the machine and took out her clothes, deep in thought. Piles of clean freshly folded clothes lay on the small table near the wall.

  The little red lace bra from the first night I met her sat on top of one of the piles. My body stiffened. I had to touch it. Sue me; I am just a man after all. I won’t lie, even if I was still an angel I would still try to touch it. I held the bra and panties up. Damn they were soft, silky, and lacy. Okay, this shit is new to me; I never got excited over a freaking piece of material before. No, it wasn’t the damn material. No. It was the thought of it being on Grace’s soft skin. Shit. This was freaking bad. I had to snap out of this.

  I heard her gasp when she saw me holding her things. She had a sexy smile on her face too. Real sexy.

  “Hey, Grace. Maybe getting an eyeful of your lingerie woke up our friend Carl from his coma. These are pretty intense undergarments. I know I’ll be thinking about them later tonight!”

  Walking over to me, she gave me a friendly shove. “You are a jerk, Shane Maxton,” she laughed.

  The shove was more than friendly too, because she kept her hands on me and my skin burned right through my shirt where her hands were. Yeah, there was something really different about Grace Taylor. I wondered again if she was part of my punishment. Well, if she was, then I was going to enjoy this hell. “Thanks, that’s like the nicest thing you’ve called me so far.”

  Biting her bottom lip, she just shook her gorgeous head at me.

  I helped her fold the rest of her clothes and carry everything upstairs. I kept the red lacy crap on top of the pile I carried just so I could look at it some more. She smiled at me knowingly.

  When we got to her room, I collapsed on her bed and watched her as she quietly put her clothes away. I kept the red lacy goodness on my chest, holding it hostage, smiling. I laid back, folded my legs across her bed with my hands behind my head.

  After everything was put away she stood above me and grabbed her bra and panties, but I grabbed her hand instead and didn’t let her go. She didn’t struggle. She just looked right into my eyes.

  I nodded my head toward her guitar, “Will you play something for me?”

  Seeming to think about it for a minute, she nodded her head and I let her hand that held her red lingerie go. Then the damn girl bit her bottom lip at me again and flicked the red lacy lingerie in my face, turned and grabbed her guitar from its case. I’m not freaking lying when I say that I have had a raging massive hard-on since I woke up. I might need to visit a hospital if I didn’t find some sort of freaking relief soon.

  Guitar in hand, she pushed me over across her bed and sat cross-legged in front of me. “What are you in the mood for?” Finding out what it feels like inside you.

  “Surprise me,” I said instead.

  She started with the theme from Sesame Street, then played You’re so Vain by Carly Simon, Lost Cause from Beck, and ended with (I Hate) Everything About You by Ugly Kid Joe. I smashed her in the head with one of her pillows. “Nice, Grace. What was that, a montage of how I feel about Shane songs?”

  Grace smiled wide. “Gee, am I that easy to read?” She teased.

  “Play something that means something to you,” I whispered.

  A slow sexy mischievous smile crossed her features.

  Her fingers whipped up a soulful jazzy melody with an edge to it. She locked her gaze on mine and the rough raspy lyrics of Piece of My Heart fell from her perfect lips.

  Tense. Deep. Fiery. The music was emotional, but the way her voice reached out and claimed my soul was maddening and fierce. Feelings bubbled to the surface of my skin and I felt like screaming out. I clutched at the blankets covering her bed. It was as if Grace was gone and the spirit of Janis Joplin was singing right in front of me. When she finished the song and her lips were parted from her breathlessness, I strained my muscles trying to hold myself back from her. My entire body ached to ravage her. It was insane.

  “You are simply the most amazingly talented person I’ve ever met,” I whispered.

  “Eh. I bet you haven’t met too many people then.”

  We stayed there, searching each other’s eyes. She slid her guitar off her lap, thumped it down on the floor behind her, and laid her body on its side face to face with mine.

  When I looked down to her lips, they parted and I lifted my hand to her neck gently and pulled her closer. I could hear the fast draws of her breath and feel her pulse racing through her veins under my thumb. Her body leaned in and her hand glided slowly up my arm to the hand that held her neck, entangling her fingers with mine. My chest was thrumming wildly for the taste of her lips.

  Then fast footfalls ran down the hallway and she broke away from me and sat up quickly. Lea slammed open the door demanding to know why there was a police car outside their apartment. Conner came running in about two seconds after her yelling the same thing.

  I freaking needed another cold shower.

  Chapter 9

  “Dude, I’m telling you. I don’t think it’s a good idea,” Conner said as he flipped through the channels.

  We had been sitting in Grace’s living room for about an hour talking about the Carl Sumpton situation, and the girls were showering and getting ready for Grace’s first gig with Mad World.

  “Yeah, well, I really don’t care, bro. I’m staying here to protect Grace until they find that guy,” I explained.

  “You’re going to push her away, dude. Grace isn’t like all the other girls you’re used to. And you’re kind of scaring the shit out of me,” he gave me a serious look and leaned in closer to me. “You look like you can fucking inhale that girl. Look, Shane. I know you’ve been clean for like eight months, but when you’re around Grace, you look high again. Are you using again?”

  You have got to be kidding me. Everybody just always assumed the worst in me.

  I bolted up and paced the room, Conner paced with me. I have no clue why.

  “Conner, I haven’t touched a drug in nine months!” I raked my hands through my hair. “Dude, you know me. You know I’ve changed, and the freaking way I feel about that girl is so much different from all the others. I’m crazy about her.” I leaned back heavily against the wall.

  Conner jabbed me in the gut, “Alright, Shane. I’ll talk to Lea and we’ll see what Grace really thinks of you and we’ll go from there.” Smiling he looked away from me towards the doorway, his eyes got wide and his face turned serious. “Oh hell no! No way, Lea! Take it off!”

  I followed his gaze and my mouth went dry. She was absolutely exquisite.

  Grace hesitantly stepped into the room sidestepping the now fighting couple. I didn’t even look at Lea’s outfit; I couldn’t take my eyes off of Grace.

  Her hair fell down in wild black waves with streaks of deep purple that reflected into her lavender-silver eyes. A silky deep purple shirt plunged daringly down her chest showing the perfect perky roundness of her very full breasts. A short fringed up denim skirt hugged her hips that showed off a pair of legs that went on forever.

  I pulled myself off the wall slowly and greedily examined every inch of her bare skin. I lingered my gaze on her eyes and lips the longest and I knew she noticed because of the breathtakingly shy smile she gave me. I slowly walked over to her and gently reached for her hand. I entwined her fingers in mine, lifted my hand over her head, and twirled her around slowly.

  “I have never seen anyone more exquisite in my entire life, Grace. You seem to have this knack of making me completely...breathless.” I spun her a
round again, brushing the silky hair off her soft shoulders. My breathing stopped; caught somewhere deep in my lungs. Lightly touching the skin on her shoulder, I inhaled deeply, “You have another tattoo,” I exhaled in a whisper. I traced the lines with my fingers, a pair of broken angel’s wings.

  The corners of her mouth slowly lifted upward sexily. “I bet that’s your signature line to try to pick up women, huh?” She looked right into my eyes, as if she was actually looking at the real me, Shamsiel, for the very first time. “They are my angel wings. To remind me and to honor what I’ve lost.”

  I flinched as if she smacked me. Selfishly, I wanted her to be talking about me. I wanted her tattoo to be the pair of wings that I wore when I was an angel. The wings that were broken and taken from my body because I had fallen in love with a human girl who looked just like her over two thousand years ago. But, I knew it wasn’t for me. “Your family,” I murmured.

  Was my selfishness a sin? What man could stand before this creature and not want the same thing? I will never regret how I longed for her like I would never regret how I felt for Selah.

  What Selah and I shared was completely innocent; a simple kiss. Before the world was what it is today, when there was paradise on Earth and angels walked among men. A simple kiss which gave me an eternity in hell.

  I held Grace’s hand as we walked the snowy streets to the bar. She kept her bottom lip tightly between her teeth the whole way as if she was holding back a secret. And Lea kept giving our hands a sideways glance and a smile.

  Boozer’s was the most crowded I had ever seen it. When we walked through the doors, Grace gasped and squeezed my hand tighter. I slid my hands around her waist and pulled her in close. “You nervous?”

  Her sparkling eyes scanned the crowd, “Excited.” Her eyes looked up to meet mine. God, I wanted to kiss her.

  “You know, for the first time in a long time, me too. I can’t wait until they hear you, and I can’t wait to play by your side up there.”