Watercolour Smile

  “I know.”

  “But he’s attracted to you.”

  I wondered if it was the darkness or the rare alone-time that was spurring this talk, since the guys usually didn’t question my relationships with the others.

  “Maybe it’s just who he is.” I felt my shoulders slump forward. “I think he doesn’t know how to control his anger very well. He gets very passionate, and sometimes it’s violent… sometimes it isn’t.”

  “But he hasn’t kissed you?”

  “He didn’t break the rules,” I repeated.

  Noah was silent, and then suddenly he was moving. He switched our positions rapidly, pushing me back against the shelves of cleaning products and whipping his arms up against one of the racks to box me in.

  “Where?” he asked.

  I blinked, my mind snagging on the picture that I had drawn, wondering if the other girl would see the same intense spark in Noah’s eyes that I was seeing now. He wasn’t leaning against my body, so the scratching was absent, but there was a tension in the air that I had never felt before with Noah.

  “He didn’t—”

  “Where?” he repeated.

  I raised a shaky hand and pressed it to my neck. His eyes followed the movement. He didn’t say anything, only stared at my neck, following the path of my fingers as I slid my hand away and let it fall back to my side, and then his eyes were back on my neck again. He shifted forward slowly, and I tensed. He breathed out a sigh, backing up again.

  “Why do you always react like that?” he asked me, the pain and frustration in his voice unmistakable.

  Tears threatened my eyes with a prickly warning, and I quickly looked away from his face, swallowing my guilt.

  “I’m sorry,” I choked out.

  “I know you asked for time.” He backed off me fully, sweeping his hands through his hair, messing it up again. “I’m the one who’s sorry. I’m being impatient…” he turned and I reached out, snagging his arm.

  When he faced me again, I entertained the brief notion of pulling him into my arms. I wanted to hold him, like I would Poison, or Clarin… like I would a friend… but that wasn’t what he wanted. That wasn’t what was causing the pain to cloud his light eyes in the darkness. Instead, I touched his face, the light scrape of my fingers bringing him close again. His hands returned to the shelves, his eyes watching me as I cupped his face. I rose up and pressed a kiss to his cheek, his skin a strange combination of rough and smooth against my lips. He stayed very still, not crowding me with his body, and a steady tickle of pleasure rippled through me. I pulled back, swallowing past the lump in my throat. The emotion hadn’t been mine; it had belonged to the bond. The realization threatened to break my heart.

  I dipped forward and kissed his cheek again so that he didn’t have to see the pain in my eyes, and he released a deep breath. I hadn’t even realised that he had been holding it.

  Something buzzed between us.

  “Noah.” My voice came out muffled, since my lips were still pressed against his skin.

  “I don’t want to answer it,” he said lightly. The way his arms shook either side of me betrayed his tone.

  When it buzzed again I pulled away and he whipped out the phone, turning away from me.

  “What?” He sounded angry now. He said nothing more to the person on the phone, and after a few seconds he hung up and stepped out of the closet, closing the door firmly behind him.

  “Ey!” someone yelled on the other side of the door. “Who you got in there, Noah?”

  “Keep moving.” Noah would have sounded calm to whomever he was talking to, but I heard the note of steel that hinted beneath his words.

  I waited for a few minutes and then he wrenched the door open and pulled me out. The hallway was empty and we walked toward the cafeteria without touching each other.

  “I’m…” Noah hesitated outside of the door we needed to walk through, passing a pale hand through his hair once again. I knew that he was about to apologise.

  “It’s okay.” I smiled shakily, touching his arm and going in ahead of him.

  We found Cabe sitting at our usual table, tapping his phone against his palm and looking worried. When he saw us, his brows drew together, his eyes flicking over our expressions before surprise settled into his face.

  “Hey, Noah!” someone called out from the nearby table. “You leave Amber in the closet or something?”

  Noah ignored the boy, sitting beside Cabe as I took the seat across from them. Cabe’s mouth was hanging open, his stare fixed on Noah. “Seriously?” he asked.

  Noah cringed. “It was kind of an accident.”

  I looked to the boy who had yelled out, and then cast my eye over their table. Tariq was sitting there, and a few girls were hanging around. I didn’t see Amber anywhere.

  “Who are you going out with on Saturday?” I asked Noah, causing them both to look away from each other.

  “Amber.”

  I masked my reaction. “Your ex-girlfriend?”

  “I wouldn’t say that we dated, exactly. Besides, she asked me at practise in front of the whole team and the cheerleading squad. She backed me into a corner. Should I cancel?”

  Should he? If he did, maybe Amber would find another way to make my sketch a reality. At least this way I had a plan to intervene.

  “No,” I said easily, despite the anxious pounding of my heart. “It’s cool.”

  We walked to class lost in our individual thoughts. Noah was probably wondering if going out with his ex-whatever was crossing some line in this weird charade that we were all trying to keep up, Cabe was undoubtedly wondering what had happened in the janitor’s closet—judging by the looks he was shooting Noah and myself—and I was wondering how I was going to get Danny alone without my good-guy-stalkers.

  Mrs. Valory spent half of the lesson running through the requirements for our composition, which was due in two weeks, and then she released us to our individual work. Danny was in the corner of the room with Mike and few other guys. He was tapping distractedly on a drum kit, laughing at something Mike was saying, while Mike was trying to covertly watch Poison, who was busy with the xylophone. I went into the practise room with the piano and Noah sat down and started playing while Cabe stood at the window.

  “I need to fix things with Poison and Mike,” I told them, stating only half of the truth. “I’ll be right back.”

  Noah nodded absently, still lost in his thoughts, and Cabe turned for a moment. “Ask her if she’s going to do her original composition on the xylophone, and, if yes, can she teach me?”

  I smiled. “Good idea. Why did we take music again?”

  His smile stretched enough to give me a glimpse of sunlight, and I quickly backed out of the room, unwilling to watch it fade again. I walked over to Poison and crouched beside her.

  “Cabe wants to know if you’re going to do your composition on that thing,” I said.

  “Hells yeah I am. Bitches love xylophones.”

  “Are you lesbian now?”

  “Munchkin, I love you, you know that—but I’m all for the heavy-duty equipment. When I said bitches, I was referring to Mrs. Valory. Teacher-bitches love xylophones.”

  “I’m not sure that they do, but I don’t dislike your logic.”

  She chuckled. “You gave your secret-keepers the slip. Is it time for Operation Cock-Block?”

  “If that’s what we’re calling it, then no.”

  “Awe.” She pouted. “Come on!”

  “Okay fine. Yes, it’s time for Operation… whatever.”

  “Don’t pretend that you don’t have a dirty hooker mouth. Say the whole thing.”

  I sighed. “No.”

  She seemed greatly amused by my reluctance. “Go get us some dates, then!”

  “What if he says no? He might like the girl that I drew. They probably already agreed to go out together.”

  “Duh, that’s why you’re cutting in, because he has the hots for you and we already know that he’s going to be
wherever they’re going. Now go!”

  I made a face at her and got up, walking over to the drum kit. Danny spotted me first and stopped playing. The guys stopped talking and turned to stare at me.

  “What’s up, Duchess?” Danny spoke up, twirling one of his sticks.

  “Saturday,” I answered.

  The drumstick slipped from his fingers, clattering to the ground. One of the guys whistled under his breath.

  Danny shot the guy an annoyed look.

  “Are you asking me out?” he questioned, picking up the stick.

  “Nope,” I answered.

  His lips spread into a smile. “I was planning on going to Reds on Saturday. Want to come along?”

  “Okay,” I said, turning around. I took a step before I paused and sought out Mike with my eyes. “You too,” I said, and then walked off. When I got back to Poison, she was lying on the ground, her arm bent over her face, laughing. “What?” I frowned at her.

  “The Duchess strikes again…” She could barely get the words out through peals of laughter. “The looks on their faces!” She struggled into a sitting position, wiping tears from her eyes. “Ah, that was amazing.”

  “Ooo-kay,” I said, patting her on the back until I was sure she was under control again. “So we’re going to Reds. What’s that?”

  “Nightclub.” She frowned. “We’ll have to get you an ID.”

  “How?”

  “Leave it to me, Cabe’s looking for you.”

  I glanced over my shoulder and saw Cabe in the open doorway of the practise room. He crooked his finger. I jumped up and walked into the room and he closed the door behind me.

  “I saw that,” he said easily. Too easily.

  Noah wasn’t playing the piano anymore; he was straddling the bench, watching us.

  “I’m going to Reds on Saturday,” I told the ground.

  “What a coincidence.” Noah sounded amused. “Cabe, you’d better find a date. This is about to turn into a family outing.”

  “That’s why you’re still acting weird?” Cabe lifted my chin, forcing me to look into his warm eyes. “You’re worried about Saturday?”

  “Yes.” I flicked my eyes to Noah.

  “Feel better now?” Noah questioned.

  “Yes.” I said again.

  “I should have just cancelled.” Noah stood up and stretched, turning to look out the window.

  Cabe frowned at the back of his head, but it was a concerned frown, and it made unease churn in the pit of my stomach. I moved to Noah’s side and touched his arm, causing him to turn. His beautiful face was etched in frustration. It hit me right in the gut like an actual physical blow. I couldn’t keep doing this to them. I stepped back from him and moved to the book bag slumped on the table in the corner of the room. I pulled out my sketchpad and flipped it open to the right page, slapping it down onto the desk. Noah and Cabe looked at the image and both of them jolted to attention, wearing identical masks of disbelief.

  “Nope.” Noah shook his head. “No way. Not possible.”

  “I knew you’d say that. That’s why I didn’t show you.”

  “Are you kidding me right now?” Noah rounded on me, curling his fist around the page until it tore from my book. “There’s no way that I would kiss Amber, or anyone else for that matter. Even if I closed my eyes and pretended it was you, it’d be like a cocaine-addict shooting up with water—”

  “Super weird analogy,” Cabe interjected.

  Noah relaxed his fist and the ruined sketch fell back to the table. He turned away and I shoved my stuff back into my bag to cover up my shock at what he had just said.

  “I believe you,” I said carefully. “I thought maybe she caught you by surprise or something.”

  “Yeah.” Noah’s voice was rough. “It doesn’t matter. This date just got a hell of a lot better, anyway. Now you’ll be there.”

  “And me.” Cabe dropped an arm around my shoulders, soothing me by rubbing the top of my head with his jaw. He was more watchful than Noah—he had seen my reaction, I was sure. “We should make this a habit, crashing each other’s dates.”

  “Not a bad idea actually.” Noah rolled his eyes. “The only thing stranger than us not dating at all is us only dating as a group.”

  “You’re right.” Cabe chuckled against my hair. “That’s even weirder than that thing you just said about cocaine.”

  “You’re not mad at me?” I asked Noah.

  He smiled and sat back down on the piano bench. “If I said I was, what would you do to make it better?”

  Cabe laughed and wrapped me into his arms, pretending to restrain me from going to Noah. “No way,” he protested. “You already got her in the janitor’s closet.”

  The door handle to the music room turned and Cabe jumped away from me, sliding onto the desk as the door swung open, revealing Mrs. Valory.

  “How are we going in here?” she asked.

  “Perfect,” Noah said smoothly, cutting off what I was about to say, which was the exact opposite.

  Mrs. Valory retreated, and Noah patted the stool beside him. By the end of the lesson I had a few bars of an original composition and it almost seemed like my previous day of anguish hadn’t happened at all.

  My last class was Gym with Cabe and Poison. It was also the only class I shared with Clarin. The boys were over on the far side of the gymnasium hall while the girls played a half-court version of netball. Poison got herself out by dribbling the ball and attempting to slam-dunk it, and then I got out by simply walking off the court to sit by Poison. Our teacher, Miss Golding, didn’t much care what we did in class, unlike the boys’ teacher, Coach Grayson. Poison and I watched as the boys ran from one side of the court to the other with Grayson shouting at them every step of the way. When Cabe caught us watching he rolled his eyes, and we laughed. Clarin was running with Cabe, and they both seemed to be moving at a deliberately slow pace. Whenever Grayson yelled at them to hurry up, they complained about various imaginary aches and pains.

  “I’ve got gout, Sir!” Clarin whined loud enough for his voice to carry to the other side of the gymnasium.

  Poison snickered.

  “I’ve no doubt that you’ve got any number of diseases, Mr. Jordan,” Grayson shouted back, “but gout isn’t one of them. Run faster! You too, Mr. Adair!”

  “Oh,” Poison muttered, staring at her phone. “Mike just texted. He said they’ll pick us up from my house Saturday at seven. He sent Danny’s number, in case you want it.”

  “I really don’t.”

  “Hmm.” Poison looked back to her phone and then started typing out a message. “I’ll let him know it’s not a date. Just hanging out.”

  “Thanks.” I brightened up at that prospect. “I told Danny I wasn’t asking him out anyway.”

  “Er…” Poison dropped her phone into her lap and gave me an odd look. “How are we going out with them then?”

  “He asked me, after I said I wasn’t asking him.”

  Poison laughed. “Right. So tell me what happened with the PSS.”

  “The PSS?”

  “The Pom Skank Squad. Amber and her cronies.”

  “I was in the gymnastics room while Tariq and the team were working out and they snuck in and stole my stuff. It doesn’t really make sense, since she’s trying to get with Noah. Shouldn’t she be trying to make nice with me instead of playing pranks on me? I’m supposed to be his sister.”

  “She’s protecting her throne. She’s always been obsessed with Noah, but nothing is more important to her than being the Queen of the school. Her daddy is—”

  Whatever Poison had been about to say was cut off as, across the court, Clarin yelled out something that sounded suspiciously like a battle-cry. The ball from our netball game had somehow gone astray, and it was in his hands now. He started to run toward our side of the court, side-stepping the girl that had run after the ball—though she didn’t look like she was going to try and wrestle it off him. She was mostly standing there with her m
outh hanging open. Cabe took off after Clarin and yelled that he was open, while waving his arms around in an entirely exaggerated way. They passed the ball back and forth, pretending that the dumb-struck girls were actually putting up some kind of resistance by dodging to either side of their prone bodies. Eventually, Clarin dunked the ball, and Grayson dragged them back to the other side of the court.

  “Anyway,” I finally said. “I don’t want to be popular. I’m no threat to Amber.”

  “Whether you want to be popular or not, people are taking notice of you. She’s going to do her best to destroy your reputation even if it destroys her chances with Noah. Speaking of which, I’m guessing you haven’t told them it was her?”

  “No, but they’ll probably find out sooner or later. I mean you found out, right?”

  “Hawk was talking to Clarin about it at a party last night and Clarin texted me. I doubt anybody is stupid enough to rat Amber out to the Adairs.”

  “This school is weird.”

  “We’re Zevs. We have a secret monarchy within modern society, and we feed off status to know where we all stand within it. That’s why everyone calls you Duchess. You act like you’re above us all, and I know,” she held up a hand to cut off my protest, “that you’re nothing like that, but they don’t. You don’t go to parties, Noah and Cabe guard you like you’re a national secret, and you’ve been here for four months already and Danny is the only one who’s gone on a date with you. Plus, there’s a picture going around of your ass in a leotard, so I think that’s probably doing good things for your popularity status.”

  “There’s what?” I screeched.

  “Err, yeah.” Poison picked up her phone again and hunted through it for a moment before showing me the screen.

  I stared at the picture, my mouth falling open. Someone had snuck up behind me and taken a picture while Hawk was stalling me in the weights room. The focus of the picture was pretty clear.

  “Oh my god.” I stood, my eyes scanning the boys’ section of the hall for the football captain. He wasn’t in this class. “Where’s Hawk right now?” I asked Poison.

  “He’s got Chemistry, I’ll find out what room,” she said, sending a text to someone. I waited until she had the room number and then I stormed out of the hall. Miss Golding didn’t even notice.