Christmas Jack-o'-Lantern
Jack bent down and started examining the scribbled notes very minutely, as if trying to decipher them. Jack noticed that each one of the corpses had long, razor sharp, black fingernails. One of them was lying down with his mouth open and his head turned sideways. An excessively long, red tongue lolled out.
Jack held the yellow paper in his finger to feel its texture. He was still holding the paper, when he sneezed suddenly, removing the paper from the head accidentally.
Instantly the corpse sprang alive, opened its mouth wide open, displayed sharp teeth and fang-like canines and grabbed Jack by his shoulder.
Jack felt a shearing pain in his shoulder.
The corpse aimed at Jack’s jugular vein and snapped its mouth.
Jack shrugged his shoulder and dodged at the nick of the moment to avoid a fatal bite.
Jack freed himself from the clutches of the sharp nails with a mighty jolt. He felt as if his flesh has been slashed with a scalpel as he ran towards the door.
Jack dashed out into the field, running as fast as he could. He looked back and saw that the corpse was chasing him by hopping frantically and was fast overtaking him.
“Hold your breath!” someone shouted at Jack.
“What?” Jack shouted back, still running as fast as he could and breathing heavily.
“Hold your breath!”
Jack saw a Taoist priest running after them, cupping his hand over his mouth and shouting at Jack loudly.
Jack was panting for a breath, but he obeyed instantly. He held his nose and mouth tightly with his hands.
The corpse was now within a few feet from Jack, sniffing the air like a hunter dog.
Jack was almost suffocating to death.
Every moment seemed like hours.
He felt like someone was strangling him with a noose round his neck.
The corpse was displaying its fierce teeth, licking its lips like an attacking wolf and was almost at Jack’s neck.
Jack felt as if his lungs were being squeezed and the air from them was being sucked out.
By now, the priest had approached the corpse from behind, silently like a cat.
The corpse turned around.
Instantly, the priest leapt forward and stuck a yellow paper on the forehead of the corpse, and sprinkled some rice grains on it.
All of a sudden, the corpse stood still like a statue and then slowly collapsed.
“That’s a Jiang-shi” the priest explained “a Chinese vampire”.
* * *
Next evening, the Taoist priest brought Jack and Barbarossa to the gates of the moss covered and dilapidated wall, which enclosed the palace.
“This is the royal palace of the emperor of the Chinese vampires” the priest said.
Jack observed that the palace compound was an enormous piece of ancient Chinese architecture. The massive wall enclosing the palace was now in ruins, with small trees taking roots at several places. Several pagoda-shaped lofty buildings towered over the wall.
The Taoist priest took out a tiffin-box shaped container and opened its lid.
“Now smear this thick paste on your face and other exposed parts” the priest said.
Barbarossa put three fingers inside the yellowish white, jelly-like paste and involuntarily brought his fingers close to his nose. “What’s this?” Barbarossa asked in disgust “I feel like vomiting!”
“Huh!” the priest snapped angrily “This is what will save your life. I have prepared this sticky rice soup, boiled in horse urine. This will repel their desire to dig their canines and suck your blood”.
The Taoist priest introduced them to the two Jiangshi guards standing outside the closed iron door with crossed spears.
Jack observed the greenish-white furry skin of both the guards.
“We have come from far away” Jack said, “We wish to meet the mighty emperor of the Jiang- Shi. Allow us to appear at his royal court and convey our message”.
The glowing pumpkin ‘Jack-o-lantern’ in Jack’s hand attracted the attention of the guard.
“What’s this?” the guard asked.
“This is a gift for the emperor of the ‘Jiang Shi’. It’s like Chinese lantern” Jack said.
“I’ll have to ask my superior whether it is to be allowed inside” the guard replied “By the way, I’ll have to ask whether you people are allowed either! I’ll be back soon”. Saying this he knocked at the massive brass knocker with the wooden end of his spear.
The gate opened, and he hopped towards his senior’s cabin.
He came back almost immediately.
“Sorry folks, foreigners are not allowed”.
“But we have some urgent matters”. Jack protested.
“Didn’t you hear what I said?” the guard displayed his fangs and terribly sharp teeth and pointed his spear “foreigners aren’t allowed. And I hate your disgusting smell”.
* * *
As they were walking along the dimly lit corridor towards the royal court, Barbarossa complained in a suppressed whisper “This is unfair Jack. Most unfair! Even at the last moment you are keeping me in the dark about your plans”.
Jack smiled and winked.
“Why won’t you disclose your plans to me?” Barbarossa snapped with deep irritation.
“Have faith in me, Barbarossa” Jack replied.
* * *
When they entered the royal court, courtesans for royal entertainment were performing a court dance.
All of a sudden, everything came to a standstill. The graceful hopping movements and stiffened-muscle (rigor mortis) type movements of the lady ‘Jiangshi’ dancers came to a grinding halt. A few of them lost their steps and fell on the floor. Everyone stared at them as if they have come from a different world.
The sudden interruption of the court dance angered the Jiangshi emperor and he threw his drinking glass on the carpet, spilling red blood.
“Who are you and why do you come here to interrupt our pleasure?” the emperor shouted, fuming with anger.
Jack introduced himself briefly and said “I came to beg your favor for unity between Western and Oriental vampires, and a promise to help each other in times of need”.
“But tell me truly, where you came from!” the emperor thundered “From the other-world, or the underworld?”
“I told you already, I belong to the Western world” Jack said.
“Stop uttering lies. There is only one empire in this world-the Chinese Empire”
“But believe me, noble emperor” Jack pleaded, “There indeed is a Western civilization, to which I belong”.
“That’s enough! I don’t believe it” the ‘Jiangshi’ emperor burst out with anger “and even if there is another empire in the west, your proposal is not worth considering” the emperor displayed his fiercely sharp, bloodstained teeth “Unity?! Huh! Even in his wildest imagination, and in a state of intoxication, our court poet wrote ‘East is east and west is west; only in battlefield hell shall we meet’. Bah!!”
“Please O noble emperor-“
“That’s more than enough! Intolerable!” the emperor roared, “we drink the blood of foreigners. But you people are so disgustingly bad smelling, that I have decided to spill your blood at the altar. Guards!!”
Instantly, five guards seized them like hawks. The razor sharp, long nails of their hands almost got hooked in their flesh.
The three of them shrieked in agony. Barbarossa turned his face towards Jack and cried in pain “Was this your plans?” The tone of accusation resonated as he almost broke in a sob.
“Take them away” the emperor ordered, “prepare for the sacrifice”.
As they were being dragged away, Jack shouted “O noble emperor, won’t you grant us our last wish?”
“What’s it?” the emperor said, seething with anger.
“I must whisper it in your ears” Jack pleaded “it’s for your ears only, O son of heaven”.
The emperor grumbled and remained silent.
“Besides, before
I die…” Jack took out the small box of vermilion, which was given to him as a ‘lucky charm’ by the cave-dwelling oracle “…I wish to apply this on your forehead, which befits the king of heavens”.
The emperor considered resentfully for a while and then winked consent at the guards.
Jack went up to the emperors throne, knelt and bowed down, and then applied a pinch of the vermilion on the emperor’s forehead. Then he whispered something in the emperor’s ears and touched his fist lightly on the emperor’s forehead.
The Jiangshi emperor rose from his throne in a trance like state and fell on his knees with folded hands.
All the courtiers stared at each other’s face in utter surprise.
Jack signaled Barbarossa to bring the glowing pumpkin ‘Jack-o-Lantern’. Then he held it high, and looked commandingly at the emperor.
The emperor rose and addressed his courtiers “All of you bow down before that lantern”
Everyone was stunned, but nobody obeyed.
The emperor’s eyes started growing red with anger at their disobedience. The tension in the atmosphere started rising. The royal court became so silent that one could hear one’s own heartbeat and buzzing sound inside the ears. The emperor shook with anger and his jaw muscles twitched uncontrollably. His neck muscles appeared now and then like stretched strings, and a grinding sound emerged from his jaws.
“That’s my order!” the emperor thundered “whoever disobeys to bow down before that lantern does so at his life’s peril”.
One by one the courtiers fell on their knees.
“I have some message for the private ears of the prime minister too, dear emperor” Jack said.
“Whatever you wish my lord!” the emperor said and kissed Jack’s feet. Then he rose up and addressed his courtiers “from now onwards, Jack shall be the supreme spiritual leader of our land”.
Jack walked towards the prime minister and said “I wish to whisper something in your ears too”.
The prime minister stood adamantly with deep suspicion in his eyes.
“How dare you disobey?” the emperor shouted, “lower your ear down to his mouth”.
The prime minister obeyed with extreme reluctance. He recoiled away from Jack initially, but as his eyes met the glowing red eyes of the emperor, he stood still. Jack whispered something and touched his forehead. Instantly, the prime minister fell on his knees and bowed down his head.
Jack addressed the gathered courtiers “So who is in command of the army?”
“I am” a fierce looking Jiangshi, dressed like a military general, stepped forward “I am the commander-in-chief”.
Jack saw the distrust in his eyes.
“Dispatch half of your Jiangshi army” Jack ordered, “I mean the fiercest half… to the old ports of Varna and Constanta in the black sea, to build strategic military bases. And send around a dozen of fiercest ‘Chinese battle Dragons’. Also send skilled craftsmen to erect forts near those cities”.
“What for?” the commander frowned “and besides, I take orders only from the prime minister or the emperor himself”
“Is it?” Jack frowned too, and turned at the emperor.
“Permission granted” the emperor nodded in a deep trance. The commander bowed to Jack, grunting and looking angry.
“Anything else we can do for you?” the prime minister asked Jack eagerly.
“Those three commands I gave” Jack replied “are my chief commands to the commander-in-chief”.
“And it shall be your task to supply rations and funds to maintain a standing army” Jack addressed the prime minister again “and better start right now-it’s almost a thousand miles along the ancient ‘silk route’ and across the strait of Dardanelles”.
The prime minister bowed down in submission, lolled out his long red tongue like a dog and indeed looked like a pet dog obediently following its master’s orders.
* * *
After Jack, Barbarossa and the Taoist priest came out of the palace gate, and the massive iron door closed behind them, Barbarossa said, “It was absolutely unbelievable! What did you whisper in their ears, Jack?”
“Nonsense!” Jack replied.
“Is that what you whispered?” Barbarossa stared at Jack in disbelief.
Jack broke into guffaws of laughter. “What I mean to say is” Jack explained, “the whispering business is plain nonsense” Saying this, Jack took out a grain of rice from his pocket and handed it to Barbarossa.
Then he handed over a magnifying glass. He observed the amazement on Barbarossa’s face and said, “It is called ‘rice writing’. I learnt about it in Krampus’s training school. And here I learned about enslaving ‘Chinese vampires’ by sticking yellow parchments with ancient verses. The entire verse from those yellow parchments has been inscribed on this. With a few modifications of course! The mantra for putting them in coma has been changed to make them obedient followers. Only one master’s name has been mentioned in these verses”.
“And that’s your name I suppose” Barbarossa said.
Jack smiled and continued, “It’s lucky that while carrying out their thorough checking, they missed this one, which I hid under my sleeves”. Jack displayed a small syringe-like hand held device “It took a split of a second, the time you take to wink your eye, to implant the rice grains under the skins of their foreheads”.
Jack winked at Barbarossa and continued “And the most remarkable thing is: Rice grain, which is used in ‘rice writing’, is also a key ingredient for keeping Jiangshi under control. What a coincidence!”
“Now both the emperor and the prime minister are under our control” Barbarossa said enthusiastically.
“Yes. But I want you to implant some more topmost officials for safety reasons” Jack said “they might conclude soon that their emperor and prime minister have gone mad and try to oust both of them”.
“But Jack, are you confident that your plan won’t snap?” the Taoist priest expressed his doubt.
“History is witness” Jack replied “when crazy despots take over, and enough mad officials follow without questioning, then madness becomes the new norm of the land; the acceptable order”.
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Chapter 31
Swayambhara in India
“Let me introduce both of you to my friend” the Taoist priest said, pointing his palm “he is my friend-a ‘Tantric’ from India”.
“A what?” Jack asked.
“A Tantric. He came here for inviting me to attend a very special ‘Swayambhara’. Since I am unable to go presently, I recommended you two instead”.
“A swayam- what?” Jack asked “And what’s ‘Tantric’?”
“Ah, you shall soon find out” the Taoist priest said “Better pack your belongings immediately. He is leaving right now”.
“Where shall we head to?” Barbarossa asked.
“To India of course!” the Tantric snapped “in the state of Assam, in North-East of India”. He turned to the Taoist priest and said, “I shall deeply feel your absence. It’s a once in life opportunity-you simply shouldn’t have missed it”.
“I deeply regret it myself” the Taoist priest said “but I must honor my commitment and deliver my fresh batch of ‘Jiangshi’ vampires to the royal palace”.
“We’ll have to cross the mighty Himalayas to visit India” Jack expressed his doubt “and we two don’t have any mountaineering equipments-“
“Don’t overwork your brains” the Tantric said with deep irritation “leave that to me”.
Within ten minutes, they had packed everything and said ‘goodbye’ to the Taoist priest.
* * *
They entered the dense forest adjacent to the Taoist priest’s village and came upon a bathtub-sized saucer lying in a small clearing, well hidden from view.
The upper half of it also looked like an inverted saucer. It had a small door on one side, and several small transparent windows.
“It will take us there” the Tantric said.
r /> “This?” Jack said with deep skepticism “it has no wheels, no horses attached. It doesn’t even look like a carriage!”
The Tantric frowned at Jack, and ordered “let’s all get inside this with our luggage”
“All of us!” This time Barbarossa expressed his surprise “How can all of us get inside that small saucer?”
“I am not used to being ridiculed” the Tantric snapped “and regarding your question of how; this is how!” The Tantric opened the door and picking up one rucksack, he threw it inside.
Instantly, the saucer grew a bit larger like an inflatable raft, as if it were made of some highly elastic yet tough material.
He threw another luggage inside.
It grew still bigger in size.
“This is a ‘Vimana Rath’, constructed as per the instructions mentioned in the Vedas” the Tantric announced proudly “it is an example of the marvelous technology of our highly advanced ancient civilization. We are not just a nation of ‘snake charmers’ and ‘Maharajas’ and…now will you people stop gazing at my face and do me the favor of getting inside!”
Jack and Barbarossa obeyed instantly.
The Tantric got inside quickly and slammed the door with a metallic bang. The ‘Vimana’ started rising in the air and moving forward.
The ‘Vimana’ continued to soar higher and higher and travelling faster and faster till it disappeared out of view.
Contrary to the Tantric’s claim, Jack was not feeling quite comfortable and spacious inside. He could not stretch his legs, but dared not complain and over-stretch the Tantric’s tolerance. He was continually gazing through the window and wondering at the sight below through the gaping circular hole beneath his seat.
Jack observed the Tantric pulling the strings and levers, and was a bit nervous that a wrong pull of the lever might send him hurtling downward through the hole.
“Shall we face language problem in India?” Barbarossa asked Jack “I don’t understand Hindustani or any regional language”
“Neither do I” Jack whispered “But I don’t think that will be a problem. I heard that after more than a century of British rule, they speak our tongue fluently”.
An hour later, they were flying over the snow covered, mighty Himalayas.
Half an hour later, the saucer started descending among the lush-green, dense forest.
It hovered above the ground and landed safely in a small clearing in front of a mighty, old banyan tree.
It was the first time in his life, that Jack saw such an amazing tree. It was a gigantic tree, covering several hectares. Roots were propagating downward from the branches. Several roots had touched the ground and have become huge trunks themselves. The tree was standing on so many trunks, that it was difficult to determine which the main trunk was. And standing above the branches was a wooden tree house.