Lost Bird

The very weird conversation, very…well, weird was the only word he kept pulling out of his vocabulary.

  Spooky weird.

  He stared at the storefront. It felt like he’d been dropped into an alternate dimension for a few minutes and had emerged from the other side.

  Kind of like when he and Oscar had dinner at his aunt’s house and she dropped the double bomb on them about dream conversations with her deceased husband, and that Sachi was someone they should look at as a romantic interest.

  It couldn’t be that easy. Nothing is that easy. Ever.

  After a few minutes, he finally pulled out of the parking space and drove back to work.

  * * * *

  It was a bittersweet two days in Idaho for Sachi. By the time Ellis and Sachi were ready to leave with the moving truck, Sachi was eager to get back to Florida.

  To having her dad there for good.

  Even better, the real estate agent was going to be showing the house tomorrow to three people, and had received several other inquiries about it already.

  Life was looking up, and Sachi couldn’t be happier.

  They had crossed into Montana, Sachi at the wheel as they headed east on I-90.

  “You all right?” Ellis asked.

  One at a time, she unclenched her fingers from around the steering wheel and flexed her right hand before putting it back on the wheel. “Fine.”

  She’d gone through this the last time she’d been this way, too, terrified that she might not make it out of Montana alive.

  Paranoid that every state trooper she saw might be a friend of Jackson Clary’s and on the lookout for her. Fortunately, the county she’d lived in before was two south of the Interstate, giving her a modicum of comfort.

  This time the stress wasn’t nearly as severe, but the old memories remained.

  In fact, this time she needed to chase a ghost of her own. As they approached the turnoff to head toward where they’d lived, she signaled.

  “We need gas?” he asked.

  “Yes, but I need to do something.”

  “Want me to take a turn at the wheel?”

  “Not yet.”

  They fueled up. She didn’t need a map to find her way south. The drive was seared in her mind.

  “Um, wrong way, Sachi.”

  “Side trip, chief.”

  Apparently he was quick on the uptake, because he didn’t ask any other questions.

  It took them nearly an hour, and she stopped at a grocery store on the outskirts of town and bought some flowers from the sparse display in their produce department. When they reached the cemetery, she sat there for a moment behind the wheel.

  “Do you want to be alone?”

  She shook her head.

  He got out and walked around the cab, opening the door for her. She shut off the engine and let him help her down. With him following, she walked a path she knew from memory, even though she hadn’t been there in over a decade.

  “I always felt ashamed I didn’t stop when I left home,” she said.

  “Why?”

  “Because I should have come by.”

  “No, I meant why didn’t you stop?”

  “Fear.” She glanced back at him. “I didn’t know what to expect. I was terrified enough driving alone through Montana.”

  “I don’t claim to understand what you went through, but I know the woman you are now. I want you to know I consider you a friend, even adopted family.”

  She stopped and turned, looking up at him. “You’re just saying that for the free skeet lessons.” She smiled.

  He smiled back. “Don’t forget the reloading.”

  The tears surprised her. She didn’t fight him when he gathered her close for a comforting, brotherly hug.

  After a moment, with his arm still draped around her shoulders, they continued through the cemetery until they reached her grave.

  She unwrapped the flowers and knelt down, tucking them into a small vase built into the gravestone. As she sat back on her heels she rested her hands on her knees and took a deep breath. She knew her mother’s spirit wasn’t buried in the ground beneath her. The marker simply indicated the final resting place of her bones.

  Countless nights, she’d lain awake and thought about what she’d say if she ever got a chance to come back here. Now, she had it, and every idea had flown from her mind.

  Across the cemetery, a flutter of movement caught her attention. A flock of doves took flight, landing in a nearby tree, a sea of brown and tan and black.

  Save one.

  One red male cardinal.

  She clapped a hand to her mouth to stifle the sob. “Thanks, Mom,” she whispered when she trusted her voice again. “I love you, too.”

  * * * *

  They were somewhere west of St. Louis when she finally found the guts to broach the subject. “You and Tarzan,” she said without preamble.

  Ellis was driving, so he couldn’t take his eyes off the road. “Yeah?”

  “I mean…how is that working? Are you guys jealous?”

  “Not that I mind discussing this with you, but can I get a little context as to why we’re discussing it now?”

  “You won’t understand.”

  “Uh, I saw a lot of weird shit happen that helped keep you and Mandaline from getting killed. Needless to say, I’m far more open-minded on the topic than I was before I met you and Mandaline, so try me.”

  She admitted about seeing the auras, about John and Oscar. And what Mandaline had done by putting her in charge of the investigation, forcing her into more close contact with the two men.

  He slowly nodded. “Okay.”

  “Not going to bust my balls about this?”

  He smiled. “No more than usual. But she’s right that you should take a chance.”

  “So back to my question.”

  “Well, I can’t answer for anyone but myself and Brad. We’ve been friends a lot of years. Since we were kids. Like brothers. I was always more worried about finding a woman who would accept my relationship with Brad. It was a good kind of shock to find a woman who fell for both of us, and we fell for her.”

  “That doesn’t answer my question.”

  “I’m getting there. Give me a minute. I think if your senses are right, and it leads to something between all three of you, it will depend on how close the men are. If they’ve been friends for years, they might be okay with it. If not, maybe not so much.”

  “You’re not jealous of Brad?”

  “No. He’s the happiest he’s been in years, and he’s been through a shit-ton of crap. He’s lucky to be alive. I’m the happiest I’ve been in my whole life. I’m not saying life’s perfect, but we sit down and talk and we each get our private time when we need it, and it just keeps working. I wanted it to work more than I wanted it to fail. Isn’t that what you guys kept telling me, that I needed to manifest it or whatever? So I do that. I focus on it succeeding.”

  “Ah, that’s the lawyer I know and adore. Using my own words against me.”

  “Okay, so think about this. What’s the best-case scenario? They both like you, you like both of them, and they both say yes they’re okay with a triad. Bonus for you. What’s the worst-case scenario? That either they don’t like you, or you don’t like them, and you walk away from it. Anything in the middle of those two extremes isn’t bad, either, you know. Like maybe clicking with one and not the other.”

  “Settling?”

  “Maybe you’re seeing available guys, not just those two.”

  “I haven’t seen any other guys, anywhere, even in the airports in Tampa and Spokane, with auras like that. Only one other time.” She stared out the window.

  “Aaand?”

  Should have known he’d ask. Damn lawyers are almost as bad as witches. “I walked away from him,” she quietly admitted. “And I shouldn’t have.”

  “Okay. So blue aura is really good, right?”

  “Not just blue. I can’t explain it. It’s different, but in a good way.” She looked
at him again.

  “I have to side with Mandaline on this one. Call them. Can’t hurt to at least meet with them for dinner or something. See what shakes out.”

  “That’s not helpful,” she grumbled.

  “No, it’s not the pat, neatly tied answer you wanted. We’re proof that it can work, however. And it should give you hope that it might work, but you have to meet the opportunity head-on, or at least halfway.”

  “There you go using logic on me again.”

  He smiled. “That’s us damn lawyers for you.”

  “Yeah, tell me about it.”

  * * * *

  With both of them sharing the driving duties, it took them right around three days, with only one overnight stop, to make it back to Florida. Her dad and Brad were waiting for them at her house when they pulled up.

  As she crawled down from the passenger side of the cab, her dad took one look at her and pointed at the house. “Bed. Now. You’re exhausted.”

  “We’ve got to unload.”

  “I’ve got that handled,” Brad assured her. “Grover’s sons and sons-in-law will be here in less than an hour to help us.

  She was too tired to argue with him, even if his logic hadn’t been sound. Fortunately, she couldn’t and wouldn’t argue. “Deal. Thanks again, Tarzan.”

  As she grabbed her backpack and headed up the sidewalk, she heard her dad ask, “Why does she call you ‘Tarzan,’ anyway?”

  She smiled as she closed the front door on whatever Brad’s reply might be. But a shower first, then she collapsed onto her bed.

  As she closed her eyes, she tried to recall what day it was.

  That was when she remembered the day after tomorrow was the scheduled do-over date for the next part of Tammy Evans’ investigation.

  She groaned. Now that her dad was, for the most part, moved, she’d have to face that business head-on.

  Face the two men head-on.

  Face her fears head-on.

  Chapter Nine

  The next morning, Sachi knew she wouldn’t get a moment of peace from Mandaline unless she asked the guys out.

  Not that Mandaline would actively bug her about it. It would be more of a case of what her friend didn’t say than what she did that would get Sachi’s goat.

  Damn witch, anyway.

  With her heart in her throat, she called John’s cell phone, figuring it would make more sense to call him than Oscar.

  She almost hung up after the second ring when his voice came on the line. “John Evans.”

  “Hey. Um, it’s Sachi.”

  “Oh, hi. What’s up?”

  She closed her eyes. Nut up, kiddo. “I was wondering if you and Oscar and I could get together for dinner, maybe tonight? Nothing fancy, maybe just meet up over at the Golden Corral or…something.” She mentally groaned. Wow. That…sucked. Even I wouldn’t go out with me.

  “Is everything okay?”

  No, I’m an idiot. “Um, yeah, just wanted to go over some stuff before we get started tomorrow night.” She hoped the Goddess would forgive her that since, technically, it wasn’t a lie.

  Technically.

  “Okay, sure.”

  She felt like she needed to add something, anything, to not sound like a dumbass. “I mean, I wanted the three of us to be able to talk. Alone. I mean, together, but alone. I mean—”

  “Without Aunt Tammy there.”

  “Yes, that.” She wanted to jump through the phone and rip the last fifteen seconds of conversation out of his memory and start over.

  Hopefully not sounding like an idiot in the process the second time around.

  But since that’s not an option… “I’d just like to get your impressions. Both of you. About her. Uh, I mean about the situation.”

  “I’ll call Oscar, but how about seven at Golden Corral?”

  Oh, thank the Goddess! “Seven sounds perfect, thanks.”

  After hanging up she sat there, pinching the bridge of her nose between her fingers.

  “So?”

  Sachi jumped, startled, and turned to see Mandaline had stuck her head through the doorway of the smaller reading room where Sachi had gone to make the call.

  “Tonight, seven. Want to come with?”

  Mandaline grinned. “You’re on your own, sweetie. Knock ’em dead.”

  She laid the phone on the table before dropping her head onto her arms. “I’m afraid I’ll be the one dying. I can barely talk to a guy.”

  Mandaline stepped in and closed the door behind her. She walked over and gently kneaded Sachi’s shoulders. “Just keep saying to yourself, ‘It’s only dinner and talking.’ That’s it. That’s all it is. It’s you facing your fear.”

  She didn’t lift her head. “That’s not my only fear.”

  Mandaline didn’t ask, knowing Sachi would eventually volunteer it.

  “I was only with one other guy before,” she softly said. “Just Tom. I mean…You know what I mean. This whole thing is crazy, and relationships don’t come with training wheels. And I think the only reason Tom put up with me as long as he did was because he had a sister who was a rape crisis counselor, so he picked her brain about how to deal with me. He wanted to be with me, but I was so scared of something happening to him, of Jackson Clary or someone coming after me, that I pushed him away. And…and in some ways, it was easier to live in fear instead of fighting for happiness.”

  Sachi finally lifted her head and tipped it back so she could look up at Mandaline. “How the fuck is someone like me ever going to have a chance at a normal relationship with one guy, much less two guys? I feel fifty shades of cart before the horse at this point.”

  Mandaline’s expression turned somber. “You simply put one foot in front of the other and have faith. Believe. Maybe you need two guys in your life. I know looking back that I’m glad I have two. And not for the sex. As much as I was hurting when Julie died, I don’t think one of them alone could have coped with what I was going through. I think the Universe put them both there for them to help me heal as much as I helped them heal.”

  Sachi rested her head back against Mandaline’s stomach. “Why do you have to go using that damn logic on me, girlie?”

  Mandaline draped her arms around Sachi and kissed her cheek. “Because I lubs you, sister. I want to see you happy. You’ve not only earned it, you deserve it. Quite frankly, I got a really good feeling when we were over there. I can’t see auras the way you can, but there was something there between you and those two guys that I can’t deny. A spark. A definite interest on their part.”

  “You really think so?”

  “Yeah.”

  Sachi drew in a long, deep breath before blowing it out again. “I’m scared,” she whispered.

  Mandaline squeezed her even more tightly. “I know, sweetie. It’s okay to be scared. This is the good kind of fear, now, not the bad kind.”

  Sachi closed her eyes. “I hope you’re right. I really want you to be right.”

  “You won’t know unless you try.”

  * * * *

  Sachi preemptively blockaded any forthcoming intestinal battles by downing an Imodium tablet after making the call. She also busied herself that day with readings for clients, a small chakras class that afternoon, and helping Mandaline with bookkeeping. Her dad had already called to tell her he’d be home late because he’d been invited out to dinner by his new employer, so no guilt there.

  Before she knew it, it was six thirty and she needed to head out to dinner.

  She stood before the store’s back door for a few moments, unable to make herself walk through it.

  “It won’t open itself,” Mandaline playfully called from down the hallway.

  “Don’t rush me, boss. I’m thinking.”

  “You’re overthinking.” Mandaline walked down the hall with Pers, her little dog, following her. “Just tell yourself you’re going to discuss the investigation and let it lead where it leads.”

  “Dammit.” She dodged around Mandaline and down the hall. r />
  Mandaline turned. “Now what?”

  “Forgot my notebook.”

  When Sachi returned to the back door, Mandaline had scooped Pers up with one hand, and opened the back door for her.

  She suspected her friend would bodily shove her through and out the door if she didn’t go of her own volition. “Tell me again this is going to be okay,” Sachi whispered. “Please?”

  Mandaline’s expression softened and she hugged her. “It’ll be okay,” she whispered in Sachi’s ear. “It’s just dinner.”

  “It’s just dinner,” Sachi repeated, stepping back and nodding.

  Mandaline smiled. “Exactly. It’s just dinner. You eat dinner every day. That’s all it is.”

  “Just dinner.” She faced the doorway again. “Just dinner.” She took a deep breath and forced her feet forward.

  Mandaline followed her, standing in the doorway but not closing it. “Call me when you get home, okay?” she told her. “Or stop by, if you want. No matter how late.”

  Sachi nodded as she got into her car. “Just dinner,” she kept muttering. “Just dinner.”

  In fact, she kept repeating it to herself the entire drive to the restaurant. And even as she stood in the restaurant’s lobby and awaited the men’s arrival.

  When she spotted them, she realized with a dawning horror of sorts that Oscar wore an Arizona Cardinals football T-shirt. John had driven them, apparently, because he held his keys in his hands.

  Attached to an Arizona Cardinals key ring.

  It took every ounce of will she had not to burst into manic giggles right there in the lobby of the Golden Corral. The men wouldn’t have understood why.

  Combined with the fact that their blue auras looked even more brilliant and vivid, which she hadn’t thought possible, she was close to becoming a babbling wreck.

  Forcing herself to shake hands with them, she opted for an obvious comment. Obvious to her, at least. “Nice shirt.” It seemed like the eyes of the cardinal on the front were staring right at her, boring into her soul.

  Yeah, got the hint. Thanks.

  Oscar looked down at his shirt. “Oh, thanks. My mom and dad sent it to me.”