Kahayatle
“You don’t hold them in very high regard, do you?”
“Why should I? What have they done to deserve it?”
“There are some good men out there. They’re not all like you’re describing.”
“Well, when you meet one, you introduce him to me and we’ll see.”
The idea made me sick. I’d already accidentally introduced her to my last boyfriend who I thought would be faithful, and now I knew how well that had worked out.
She spared me any more thought provoking conversation and walked over and grabbed a backpack from the pile, throwing it up onto her back. “You going to forgive him?”
“Sure. I forgive anyone pretty much anything if they’re genuinely sorry.”
“Are you going to take him back, though?” She picked up another backpack and blew a really sharp whistle towards the door using just her lips and teeth.
“I don’t know,” I said, mostly to myself. I couldn’t imagine a life without him, and I couldn’t imagine one with him either. It was probably because the Bodo I thought I knew didn’t really exist, and in his place was this stranger.
“Well, if you decide to cut him loose, send him my way. We’ll take good care of him.”
I’ll bet you will, you boyfriend ruining jerk. “Thanks.”
I was leaving to go back inside when I remembered the other thing I’d wanted to talk to her about.
“Oh, I forgot to ask … do you have any way of making antibiotics?”
“Yes. We’re stockpiling the ingredients now.”
“Can we trade you for some?”
“Sure. What did you have in mind?”
“Not sure. What do you want?”
“We could use some clothes.”
“I have lots of prisoner jumpsuits. And apparently lots of slippers and hairnets.” I laughed at that, picturing these gorgeous girls running around like imprisoned cafeteria workers. I’d bet they’d all refuse to wear them.
She shrugged. “That’ll work. I’ll send someone for them later. For now, this should do for you.” She reached into the bag in her hands and tossed me a small sack similar to the one that the bird feed was in. “It’s a broad spectrum antibiotic. A little rough around the edges but should fight most common infections. Four times a day.”
I opened it and saw several pills inside. They were in the shape of regular medicine but not exactly uniform. “How did you make these?”
“Supplies from my old work. If you have anyone in your group interested in chemistry, send them our way. I can get them trained in a couple months on some basics, and you can have your own in-house pharmacy. Nothing fancy, but painkillers, antibiotics and fever reducers for sure.”
“Wow, that’s amazing. Thank you so much.” I gave her my first genuine smile of the afternoon. “I don’t really understand why you’re being so generous, but I appreciate it.”
She walked over and put her hand on my shoulder. She was so much taller than me I had to look up to see her face.
“Good people have to stick together, and most particularly, good women. This world belongs in the hands of those who will nurture and guide. You’re one of those people. I invest in assets that will give me a return. Haven is one of those places. If my place ever burns to the ground, I hope we can find a home with you here, at least until we find another.”
I reached up and put my hand on her forearm. “Absolutely. Our home is your home.”
“Cool.” She leaned in a kissed me on the cheek. “I’m outta here, chica. Tell the others I said goodbye.”
Her compatriots came out the front door right on time and joined her at their pile of belongings. Once they were all suited up, they walked to the gate.
Ronald came out with the keys. They jingled as he sorted through them to find the one that would do the unlocking.
He turned the tumblers and I helped him push the gate open and then closed again. As he locked it back up, I stared at the Amazons through the links.
“See you soon,” said Kirsten, her back to me.
“Yeah. See you soon,” I said.
Ronald and I stood side-by-side watching them walk away.
“Everything go okay?” asked Ronald after they were well on their way. I turned to face him, and he stared at my bloodshot eyes, his own filling with concern.
“Things with the Amazons went … well. Very well, I think.”
“And things with you? How are they going?”
“I guess that remains to be seen.”
Ronald put his arm around me as we walked to the door. “God works in mysterious ways, you know. I know things are strained between you and Bodo right now, but don’t count love out of the picture just yet.”
“I’m not counting love out. I have a lot of it around me. I just don’t know how this story is going to end.”
“That’s what makes it interesting,” he said, opening the door for me. “If we knew the ending, we’d never want to do the middle part. It’s not the destination that matters anyway. It’s the journey.”
“Sometimes I want to cheat and skip to the end.”
“No. I don’t think any of us would like that. Just be patient. God has a plan for you, and it’s a good plan. I promise.”
“Thank you, Ronald. I hope you’ll agree to be our church guy here at Haven. I don’t know who will come to be a part of your gig or your services or whatever, but I’m sure there will be some.”
“It’s already in the works, don’t you worry about that.” He gave me a hug before gesturing for me to go into the building before him.
We went inside, and I took Peter up on an offer to give me a tour of Haven. He wanted to show me everything they’d done to organize it, and I wanted to get away from all the people who were expecting me to make their lives good again.
***
Two weeks went by with a flurry of activity. Jenny proved herself worthy of the title Code-Reader and she had two new birds in her flock of messengers, given by a happy compatriot over at the Amazon contact point. They were very happy with her progress as were we.
Several more Miccosukee and Creek kids had joined us at Haven, bringing more animals and supplies. We added lots of stragglers too, who’d made their way down I-95, sent to us by the Cracker Barrel contact point and the Amazons.
Everyone who came was offered a cell to make into an apartment. None of them had windows, but they were worlds better than where most of them had been sleeping, and you couldn’t beat the security system. A pack of dogs, four watchtowers with armed guards, and several explosive-rigged traps ringed our little town. Many signs warned people approaching to follow a very specific protocol before coming to the gate or risk being blown to bits. It was harsh, but effective. We’d had zero accidents and all good additions to our community so far.
But while several things were going well for us, there were still some problems we had to deal with on a regular basis, and two of them haunted me night and day: Bodo and the girl I liked to call the Bad Penny. No matter what I said or did to smooth things over with her, she just kept turning up under my nose making me nuts.
“Gail, I’ve already said this to you like fifty times.” She was standing in front of me and Peter in Peter’s workspace. We were sitting in two of the swivel chairs that ringed a large laminate, oval-shaped table.
Peter had claimed an old conference room as his City Manager headquarters, and it was stocked with all the writing materials we could find and a huge cork board and magnetic board. All of his plans were hanging up around the room, and over fifty checklists were in the process of being completed and refined at all times.
“I don’t have to listen to that crap from you,” she responded, arms folded across her chest.
“Uh, yes you do,” said Peter, as frustrated with her as I was. “Bryn makes the rules here, and you follow them. Just like everyone else does. You’re not special. You’re not the exception. No one is.”
“Could-a fooled me,” she said in a mocking tone. “I don’t see you
coming down on Fohi for getting involved in the weaving.”
“That’s different.”
“How so? You said his job was setting traps. But eeevery day I see him in the weaving room, messing around with the looms. That means you do let people do other jobs. I guess that rule only applies to certain friends, though.”
“You’re comparing apples and oranges again,” said Peter, getting ready to launch into his politically correct explanation about how we have to spread out our resources and put the most qualified person in the most appropriate position. Fohi was just there flirting with Winky, but that had nothing to do with this at all. Gail knew this. She was just trying once again to get under our skin.
I held my hand up to silence Peter. I was staring at Gail the whole time. “Okay, Gail, here’s the deal. We’ve been understanding of your issues, nice to you …”
“Issues?”
“Yes. Issues. We’ve been nice to you, given you food, clothing, shelter, everything you need to survive and thrive here … and all you’ve done is cause trouble.”
“That’s bullshit.”
“No, it’s not. You harass Jenny non-stop about the birds, you mock Fohi until he punches walls, you say negative remarks about the food to anyone who will listen … and frankly, none of us is interested in your shit anymore. It needs to stop, and it needs to stop today.”
“I’m just interested in learning the code stuff too. What if Jenny gets sick? What if something happens to her? You need a second person trained.”
“That second person will never be you, you can count on that,” said Peter.
“Listen, gay boy, I don’t need you …”
I stood up all of a sudden, the chair flying out behind me. “Stop right there!” I came from around the table to stand just a couple feet from her.
She backed up as far as she could go, until she ran into a shelving unit with files on it. “Stay back. I have a knife!”
“You’d better not have a knife. You know this is a weapon-free zone.”
She fumbled in her pocket and pulled it out, holding it up in front of her and pointed at my face. “Stay back, I’m not kidding. I don’t have to stand here and be bullied by you. I have the right to defend myself.”
The weapon looked like something she’d made out of a piece of metal she’d found and sharpened.
“What is that?” laughed Peter. “A prison shank?”
She held it up threateningly at him. “It’s a knife, and it’s sharp, so shut up.”
I whipped the side of my hand over and made contact with her wrist, sending the metal flying across the table and crashing into the wall. It fell to the floor with a loud clank.
“Ow!” she shrieked. “What’d you do that for!”
I sighed. “Gail, I’m putting you under arrest.”
Her mouth dropped open. Then she frowned. “Under what authority?” she scoffed.
“Under my authority,” I said, grabbing her upper arm and dragging her from the room.
She tried to dig her heels in and stop me from bringing her down the hall, but it wasn’t even slowing me down. I was determined to end the nonsense; the insult thrown at Peter was the final straw for me. I needed to take care of her once and for all. This girl was a pure poison and something had to be done with her. We’d put it off for long enough. At this point it really felt like she was putting the people of Haven in danger.
She kicked me hard in the back of the thigh, slowing us down and giving me a hell of a bruise.
I turned around and smashed her in the collar bone, dropping her to her knees.
“Get me a pair of handcuffs,” I said to Peter, holding her down on the floor by her hair.
She was screaming like a woman possessed and swinging her arms around awkwardly, trying to grab a hold of me.
“B-R-B!” yelled Peter, running down the hallway in the opposite direction.
“I’m going to fucking kill you, you bitch! You’d better run far away because I’m not going to stop until you’re dead!”
I put my knee in her back while I waited for the restraints to arrive. “Why all the hate, Gail? Why against me? What’d I ever do to you?”
“Shut up.” Her voice was muffled, buried in her upside down shirt somewhere. “You know exactly why. You’re always walking around here like you’re the best thing since television, letting your friends do whatever they want and keeping everyone else penned in like animals. All you are is a slave driver. A zoo keeper. You’re nothing. All it takes is a single bullet to end your bullshit.”
Her words hurt my feelings, and her threat chilled my blood. She wasn’t like Coli, a raving loon; she was just an unhappy person, jealous maybe, but so full of hate.
Before I could do anymore dime-store psychoanalysis on my prisoner, Flick and Derek showed up, both of them carrying restraints and nightsticks. They were our small town police force, the single sheriff and only deputy.
“What the hell?” asked Flick, reaching down to pull her up.
Once she was straight again, Derek put handcuffs on her and looked her over. “You hurt?” he asked.
“Not unless you count the wrist she practically broke. She’s fucking brutal you know. I guess in our new world being brutal’s allowed. You guys like people who hurt other people.”
“Give it a rest, Gail,” said Flick. “Don’t you ever get tired of being a pain in the ass?”
“Oh, sorryyyy mister Hollywood. What’s the matter? Bummed because you finally ran out of hair gel?”
Flick looked at me, the restraint of many practiced hours of keeping the peace on his face. “Where do you want her?”
“Put her in one of the closer cells. I need to send someone to talk to her.”
“I’m not interested in listening to the preachers anymore. They can keep their god and all that other shit to themselves.”
“It won’t be the preachers,” I said as she walked away with her jail keepers. “It’ll be the chiefs.”
“I don’t answer to any indian chief!” she yelled over her shoulder.
“They’re not indians,” I said softly, “they’re Native Americans.” I turned away and walked down the hall to the lobby. I had to go find Trip and Paci and ask them what we should do.
***
I found Paci outside with the sheep. He was watching a group of kids get trained on how to sheer them using the manual scissor things they had, courtesy of the Creek tribe. The whole process was turning out to be a mess of wool flying all over the place and kids chasing bleating animals in circles.
“Hey,” he said as I walked over to stand next to him. “What’s up?” His smile was warm, even though the constant sad look he had around his eyes over the loss of his brother was still there. It never fully went away.
“We have a problem. I’m wondering if you and Trip can come help me.”
“Supply issue?”
“No. Gail issue.”
He pulled away from the fence. “Again? When is that girl going to get a grip on herself?”
“Pretty much never, I think. She sealed the deal with me today. Threatened to stab me and then put a bullet in me.”
“Nice. I always said she must have a death wish.”
“Yeah. I just don’t see how we can keep her here. She’s nothing but trouble.”
Paci walked with me towards the prison entrance. “She’s always bothering Jenny. She’s come to me a couple times asking for advice on how to convince her to share the codes. I always tell her to just drop it.”
“Thank you for that,” I said, glad Paci was smart enough to know how to handle her without advice from me. “Gail is the last person in this entire place I’d trust with the codes.”
“Exactly. She makes me really nervous.”
“We have to decide what to do with her. Like have a trial or something. I need you and Trip there to help me. I can’t do this on my own.”
“The mark of a true leader … knowing when to ask for help.”
“I learned a l
ot of what I know from my dad but also from your brother.”
Paci smiled briefly before looking a little sad. “Yeah. My brother taught me everything I know. I didn’t really appreciate that before, but I do now.”
We rounded the corner to the front of the building and saw Bodo standing at the fence, staring out towards our traps set into the road.
“Go ahead inside. I’m going to talk to him,” I said.
“See you in a few.” Paci left me, passing through the open glass door. Gail’s bad news had apparently made its way to the lobby. I could see and hear kids talking in groups.
I walked over to join Bodo. I stood at his side for a little while, saying nothing. Things were more than strained between us. We’d pretty much taken a time out, spending more time apart than together. We each had our own cell-rooms, and they weren’t near one another.
“Hi,” he said finally. His voice was rough with emotion.
“Hi.”
“Is dare a problem?”
“Yes. Gail again.”
“She needts to go.”
“Yes, she does.” My chest tightened. There was so much to say, but I didn’t want to be the one to start.
“I think I should go too,” Bodo finally said. “Maybe chust to have a break for a little while.”
I pressed my lips together to keep them from trembling. This was so not the time for this. But it was happening, and to stop it would have been disrespectful.
“Why? Why do you have to go? It’s dangerous out there.”
“Yes, it is. Dat’s true. But in here it’s dangerous too.” He looked down at the ground, holding onto the fence with his fingers above his head while he kicked the gravel with his toe.
“Not really. It’s safer here than most places.”
“Maybe for some things. But for my heart, it is not safe. It is destroying.”
I knew what he meant. Every day that I saw him moving around without me, doing his thing and smiling when I wasn’t a part of his life, a little piece of me felt like it shriveled up and died or something. It was a painful process, this one of letting go.