Adventures of Tain Bb, Hello? And Dumb
Chapter Six, In Which Dumb Illustrates The Wonders Of Dumb-Headedness, And Tain Bb And Hello? Enter A Detachment Of Scouts Who Follow The Sun
It has to be said that Dumb really did know his way around the enormous Light Forest. He easily found paths that were known only to him through seemingly impassable thickets. He pointed out where, by jumping from stone to stone, you could get across to the other side of a shallow but tempestuous river, and radiated confidence in his movements.
It would be fitting to point out that the Light Forest was staggering in its vast variety of flora and fauna. Simply speaking, much of what you could encounter anywhere on earth grew, lived, and bred here in the oddest combinations. So, for example, a blue Siberian pine could easily embrace the trunk of a coconut-palm with its branches, and nothing prevented the sunlight from descending another two levels to where a raspberry bush, a corn plant and the mystical tropical vegetable kudayo (outwardly resembling a brick, but tasting like watermelon) grew together. As for the animals there were more donkeys, goats and rams than anything else, but only in the Light Forest could one find the flying dogs called pitnamburs. They were friendly with monkeys and ate fly agarics.
And it was never quiet in the Light Forest. It was filled with an unimaginable multitude of sounds. Mixing with each other, they wove a completely unique canvas of sounds. You could listen to the music for hours and it would never repeat itself.
‘Oh, look at that!’ Hello? would exclaim every couple of minutes.
‘No, you look at this!’ Tain shouted back, pointing at something else.
There was a mass of impressions. In short, the Light Forest was a wonderful place – and no-one could argue with that.
Dumb went ahead with an imperturbable face. It seemed that he was completely untouched by this riot of colours, scents and sounds. Moving fairly quickly, he didn’t once sit down or look back at his new friends. This started to irritate Hello? more and more.
‘Hey, Dumb!’ Hello? said to his back, slowly losing control but trying with all her strength to be calm and respectful. ‘Where are we actually going?’
Dumb glanced back, his face expressing bewilderment.
‘We’re…it’s…’ he scratched his cheek. ‘That is…to say…we’re walking along the path, in short.’
‘We understand that,’ snorting, Tain Bb pushed into the conversation. ‘We’re not flying on a rocket or sailing on a ship. Hello? asked where we’re headed?’
‘It…seems there’s going to be rain soon,’ Dumb replied dully and plodded on further.
Tain had never seen Hello?’s eyebrows raised so high. She nodded her head significantly in Dumb’s direction and made circles around her ear with her finger, at which Tain shrugged his shoulders.
Hello? was seething all over, ready to burst with anger, but there was nothing for it but to follow. So as to vex Dumb a little she devised what was in her opinion a very insulting song about his hat:
‘Neither a hedgehog nor a thicket,
You can’t wear a jacket,
Your clothes get ripped to shreds,
From the needles on your head.’
Hello? sang this song with satisfaction at different tones, sometimes rising to a yell, sometimes switching to a threatening whisper. And strange to say: after a time the feeling of vexation and irritation gave way to her usual good mood. Everyone became merry.
‘We, it…,’ said Dumb, without turning back. ‘We’re going to the Trumpeter-at-Dawn. Everyone goes to the Trumpeter first…’ and he stopped at a flat stone that looked like a table.
‘Let’s have a rest and a snack,’ he declared ironically.
Hello? and Tain Bb fell to the grass with relief. At the same time Dumb took off his hedgehog hat and carefully shook everything off it onto a napkin: bunches of bananas, three oranges, a pair of avocados, several pears, a mango and a coconut. Having cleaned and cut the fruit, he skilfully cracked the coconut in half. Without spilling a drop of milk, he divided a fruit mixture between the two coconut bowls.
‘Fruit soup,’ he explained and placed the bowls in front of Tain and Hello?. ‘Eat.’
‘And what about you?’ Hello? asked, undecided.
‘I don’t want any,’ leaning back, Dumb closed his eyes.
‘I don’t want any either,’ said Tain Bb, yawning. ‘You and Hello? eat it while I have a nap.’
‘You know what?!’ Hello? said decisively. ‘I can’t stand bananas, oranges, pears and, especially…’ her voice began to shake treacherously, ‘I really can’t stand…coconut milk! So you two eat! And meanwhile I’ll…’ Here she fell silent, not having thought of anything to say.
Dumb started to laugh, and the others soon joined in.
‘My friends,’ he said, ‘seriously. I’m full, honestly. Think about it: it’s not possible for me to go hungry in the Light Forest. Why, I can find any food I want in six secs at any time of day, and its non-stop breakfast, lunch and dinner until I burst. Now please, I’m begging you,’ again he closed his eyes. ‘We’re not at a royal reception…’
‘Fine,’ Hello? said reluctantly. ‘Come on, Tain, let’s take him at his word. Bon Appetite!’
‘Ahuh,’ said Tain. He had already eaten everything. Afterwards they lay under a tree and listened to a woodpecker tapping out its intricate rhythm.
‘That’s a wonderful song,’ Dumb said unexpectedly. ‘I even know the words.’
Hello? raised her eyebrows, winked at Tain and said ingratiatingly:
‘No way! So maybe you’ll sing it?’
‘Why not?’ Dumb replied seriously. ‘Listen. This is the song of the Scouts who Follow the Sun.’
‘What?’ Hello? didn’t understand. ‘I mean, who?’
‘Don’t interrupt. The Scouts who Follow the Sun. That’s us!’ Dumb laughed and began to recite the words in a sing-song voice, to precisely the rhythm that the woodpecker was tapping out:
‘You know there are certain people,
Who never wear a mask,
But undergo a transformation,
To perform a special task.
The Scouts who Follow the Sun.
The Scouts who Follow the Sun.
Bringing changes,
And causing confrontations,
Masked gowns and nets,
Helping to rise up,
Level with car-jacks,
Level with everything to the water-line,
Positive – yellow,
Negative – blue,
And that’s fine.
The Scouts who Follow the Sun.
The Scouts who Follow the Sun.
Ignoring and voiding everything,
Even radioactive strontium,
And plutonium,
No one knows them, but understands,
There is someone like them but different,
Patronising, never sympathising,
Functioning with ‘-ing’.
When you’re sitting in your chair,
They’re always at the border of the summer,
They’re always where the summer is,
And they’re always ready like an army pilot,
To push the ultraviolet button.
The Scouts who Follow the Sun.
The Scouts who Follow the Sun.’
Dumb fell silent. The song had finished. Tain Bb and Hello? were also silent, trying to understand the importance of the secret that had just been revealed to them.
It turns out that they were the Scouts who Follow the Sun. Strength, firmness of spirit, bravery, determination to complete tasks – all this now related to them. Their eyes shone and their shoulders straightened. ‘We are one whole, one detachment, one team,’ they thought, ‘and together no matter where, even to the ends of the earth.’
‘We need to hurry,’ Dumb said indifferently, evidently failing to notice his friends’ high spirits. ‘Are you rested? Then let’s go!’
And they again moved on, counting on reaching the place before the onset of darkness.
That’s wh
at happened. Passing first through a baobab grove, then through a field of wild hemp, they emerged at the base of a round hill. On the summit they could see a house with extensions, and a thin smoke was rising from the chimney. A path sloped up to the house, winding around large boulders. The distance didn’t seem great, but a substantial time had passed before the weary travellers arrived in front of the house. A little bell hung from the door, and light-beige curtains were flapping in the draught through the open windows.
Dumb was the first to climb the steps and lightly flicked the bell with his nails. A mighty low ring resounded unexpectedly. Tain Bb and Hello? were taken aback, Dumb snorted, pushed the door, and they entered the house.