Waiter, There's a Clue in My Soup! Five Short Mysteries

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  When Casey and I got married—which we did almost instantly upon meeting each other, and before we even knew each other’s real names—Casey had balked at the vows. Obey was out of the question, and the rest of it didn’t make much sense, since we didn’t hardly know each other. So she changed it and we vowed to watch each other’s backs. But I had already taken the regular vow when she decided to change it, so I’d taken both vows.

  I did love, honor and cherish her, and I was faithful to her. I just happen to be easily distracted by pretty things, especially when they are female, or when they involve pie. And when my eyeballs get to wandering, Casey can get mad, but she mostly gets mad because it forces her to acknowledge that the other vow had meant something, and she still wasn’t sure she wanted to do that. Sometimes I was tempted to push the issue a little, just to get that acknowledgment, but the one thing Casey really trusted me for was not to hurt her feelings. It was bad enough doing it once in a while by accident, but I sure didn’t want to do it on purpose.