Like You Mean It
“That was funny as hell.” Justin laughed again. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but it shattered my image of you. I thought you were this sweet, innocent little girl, and then you go and drop an F-bomb on my poor, unsuspecting parents. I don’t know how they’ll get over it.”
Danni’s heartbeat quickened. “How mad do you think they are?”
“I don’t think they’re mad at all,” Justin assured her. “Tonight was good. I think it might help D.J. feel a little better about himself and really start to move on.”
“I hope so,” Danni agreed.
When Justin stopped in front of her house, Danni got out of the car first and pulled the seat forward for her friends to climb out. “Thanks for the ride,” she said. “Later, J.J.”
“Later, Danni,” Justin echoed.
As the girls got closer to the front door of the house, the motion sensor activated the porch light. Danni fished her keys from her purse and let them all inside. It wasn’t until she closed the door behind them that she heard the roar of Justin’s Camaro engine fading away, and Danni smiled. She hadn’t realized he was waiting to make sure they were inside before speeding off.
Once the girls were in Danni’s room, they searched for their pajamas and took turns in the bathroom where they changed and brushed their teeth. Danni went first so that she could gather some blankets and pillows from the linen closet and arrange them on the floor. After they’d all changed and washed up, they settled on the floor.
“That was the best meal I’ve had in forever, and Darren’s dad is freaking hilarious,” Chelsea said.
“It was good,” Marcy agreed.
“I’m just glad we had something to celebrate,” Danni said. “It would’ve sucked if Darren lost.”
“Yeah, it would have, especially if that asshole Spencer had won,” Chelsea said. “No offense, but I thought Darren was gonna lose it there for a second.”
“He did look a little freaked out,” Marcy said.
“A little freaked out?” Chelsea repeated. “The guy just stood there staring into space for like two minutes. I thought I might have to scream ‘I wanna have your baby’ again.”
Danni laughed. “I thought that was you this afternoon!”
Chelsea shrugged. “I wasn’t serious. I was just trying to make him feel better with a little joke.”
Danni smiled. “That was really sweet in your warped way.”
“It was really sweet what Darren said about you in his speech and how he gave you those roses,” Marcy said.
“Oh no!” Danni cried. “I left the flowers in his dad’s car.”
“Relax, his mom will probably take care of them for you,” Chelsea said.
“I’m not worried about that. I don’t want Darren to think I don’t care that much about them,” Danni explained.
Chelsea snorted. “Please! You did hear his speech, right? The guy is totally in love with you. You can do no wrong in the eyes of Darren Jacobs.”
Maybe, but she still felt terrible. Not because she worried that he’d think she didn’t care about the flowers but because she was afraid of him reading too much into the slip.
Chapter Nineteen
None of the girls were in a hurry to get up on Saturday morning. By the time they rolled out of bed, it was after ten in the morning.
“I’m starving,” Chelsea announced.
Danni stood up. “What are we waiting for then?”
“I’m not going anywhere until I’ve prepared,” Marcy said.
Chelsea frowned at her. “Prepared for what?”
“For the possibility of running into Nick,” Marcy explained.
“What time is it?” Danni asked, and answered the question herself with a glance at the clock on her night stand. “I doubt he’s even here. He’s probably at the gym or something.”
“You can stay here and prepare if you want, but I’m going to find something to eat,” Chelsea insisted.
“Fine, I’m coming,” Marcy said, following the words with a sigh.
The girls padded down the stairs, and Danni stopped short when they entered the kitchen. Not only was Nick home, but he was bent over the open refrigerator wearing nothing but a pair of loose fitting boxers.
“Do you have to walk around here like that?” Danni demanded.
Nick grinned as he turned to face them. Rather than being ashamed to find three girls standing behind him, he widened his stupid looking grin. Danni grimaced. The view from the front was even more revealing than it had been from the back.
“I thought you died up there,” Nick joked.
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” Danni retorted.
“I’m not that bad,” Nick said. “Besides, if you did die, Mom would blame me.”
“She’d have to come home for that,” Danni said.
Nick laughed. “True. Anyway, I’ll catch you later.”
“Later,” Danni echoed as Nick slid past them.
Marcy shot an accusing look in Chelsea’s direction. “Remind me never to listen to you again.”
“Relax,” Chelsea said. “He didn’t even notice you.”
“I know, just like you know Justin Jacobs never notices you,” Marcy shot back.
“Anybody want orange juice?” Danni changed the subject.
Though neither girl answered, Danni filled three glasses with juice and took them to the table. Chelsea wrinkled her nose when Danni pulled a packet of cream cheese from the refrigerator before retrieving a bag of bagels from the bread box.
“What’s wrong?” Danni said. “I thought you liked bagels and cream cheese.”
“Don’t you have anything less fattening?” Chelsea asked.
“Why? It’s not like you have to watch what you eat for Justin Jacobs,” Marcy said.
“At least Justin knows my name,” Chelsea said. “Nick doesn’t even know you’re alive.”
Danni heaved an exasperated sigh. “Would you two please stop? It’s not like either of you have a chance with these guys.”
“Why not?” Marcy asked. “You never thought you had a chance with Darren, and now you’re like the world’s most perfect couple.”
“Yeah, because he lost his arm and got desperate,” Chelsea said.
Danni drew in a sharp breath while Marcy’s jaw hit her chest. A blush lit up Chelsea’s cheeks. The dead silence in the room only amplified the ticking of the clock on the wall.
“I’m so sorry,” Chelsea said. “That was a shitty thing to say, and I’m the most horrible friend in the world. Go ahead and slap me. I deserve it.”
“I don’t want to slap you,” Danni said.
“Okay, look, the truth is I’ve been taking bitch lessons from Whitney,” Chelsea continued. “Anyway, I think I’m gonna have to cancel the lessons ’cause I’m getting way too good.”
Danni finally cracked a smile. Chelsea always had the funniest way of putting things. Besides, it was impossible to stay mad at her best friends.
After breakfast, which Chelsea ate without further complaint, the girls walked up the stairs to Danni’s room. Even though they hadn’t seen Nick for the last hour, Marcy wasn’t taking any chances on running into him again until she dressed and fixed her hair. When Danni pushed open the door of her bedroom, they were greeted by the ringing of her cell phone.
Chelsea smirked at Marcy. “I’ll bet you a hundred bucks that’s Darren calling.”
“That’s kind of a dumb bet to make since no one else ever calls her,” Marcy said.
“Hey!” Danni said as she snagged the phone from the night stand.
“Nobody calls you besides us I mean,” Marcy corrected herself.
“Hey, baby,” Darren said when Danni put the phone to her ear.
“Hey yourself,” she replied. “What’s up?”
“Are you busy today?” Darren asked.
Danni looked over at her friends. “Why?”
“I could use some help with that paper I have to do about the accident. I thought maybe you could write i
t if I tell you what to say.”
“Give me like five minutes and I’ll call you back.”
“Cool, love you.”
“Love you too,” Danni echoed and then set her phone aside.
Chelsea and Marcy traded knowing glances.
“Why do I get the feeling we’re about to be ditched for Darren?” Chelsea asked.
“It’s for a good reason,” Danni said. “He needs help with some homework that’s due Monday.”
Chelsea raised her eyebrows. “And his parents can’t help him with that?”
Danni shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“We see how it is,” Chelsea said, smiling at her. “Darren’s more important than us.”
“That’s not true,” Danni replied, but the words sounded like a lie, even to her own ears.
“Yeah, okay.” Chelsea looked at Marcy. “So, you think we should make this easy for her, or should we lay on the guilt?”
Marcy smiled. “Lay on the guilt all the way.”
Chelsea laughed. “How can you do this to us, Danni? We’re supposed to be your best friends and you’re bailing on us to hang out with your boyfriend again. Whatever happened to sisters before misters?”
Danni giggled. “What if I promise to make it up to you?”
“How?” Marcy asked.
“I’ll buy us pizza tonight,” Danni offered.
“I like pizza,” Chelsea said. “What do you think, Marcy?”
“Yeah, I’m good with free pizza,” Marcy agreed. “You can just drop us off at my house on the way to Darren’s, and I’ll get my mom to drive us back at six.”
Chelsea gave her friend a sly smile. “That’ll give you plenty of time to help Darren get his homework done.”
Danni stuck out her tongue at them as she plucked her phone from the night stand once again to call Darren. “Okay, I’m good to go,” she said when he answered. “I just need to shower and change and then drop off Marcy and Chelsea so it’ll be like an hour before I get there. Is that cool?”
Darren groaned. “You have no idea what you’re doing right now, do you?”
Danni furrowed her brow. “I don’t even know what you’re talking about.”
“I’m talking about you giving me that image of you in the shower.”
“Oh, I, uh, didn’t mean to.”
“Are you blushing, Danni?”
“I’m sure you know the answer to that. I’ll see you soon.”
“Okay, baby, I love you.”
“Love you too,” Danni said.
The thought of him picturing her in the shower made Danni’s stomach tingle. It reminded her of how she felt the first time she touched him. Ignoring the sly smiles of her friends, Danni hopped from her bed and darted into the safety of the bathroom.
* * *
Just after twelve, Danni made it to Darren’s house.
He gave her a big smile when he opened the front door. “Hey, did you have lunch?”
“No, but I had a late breakfast,” she replied. “We can eat later if we get hungry.”
“Okay,” Darren said and stepped aside to let her in.
“Where are your parents?”
“They went to do some shopping and then visit my grandparents.”
“You mean your mom left us alone in the house?”
“Yeah, because my dad made her.”
“Where do we want to do this?” Danni asked and then turned red as she realized how that sounded.
“Family room is fine,” Darren said, grinning.
After they settled on the couch, Danni reached into her backpack for a notebook and pen. The way Darren fixed his penetrating, blue eyes on her it felt like he was trying to use them to pull her toward him. Leaning across the couch, she kissed him. Danni’s notebook and pen slid to the floor as she crawled into Darren’s lap and began kissing him while her hands explored his body. He groaned when she took his hand and slid it under her shirt.
Breaking away, Danni rested her forehead against his. “I don’t think we’ll get any work done this way.”
“We could get even more done,” Darren replied with a grin.
She laughed. “I don’t think your parents would buy that.”
“My dad might.”
“That still leaves your mom.” Danni climbed off Darren’s lap and retrieved her notebook and pen from the floor. “Anyway, I thought I’d write this now and take it home to type it.”
Darren’s eyebrows shot up. “You wouldn’t mind doing that?”
“I wouldn’t have offered if I did,” she said. “Okay, so how did the accident change your life?”
“Let’s see,” he replied, and Danni heard the sarcasm lurking in his tone. “I lost my arm and one of my best friends. I can’t draw or play baseball or tie my shoes or zip my pants. Oh yeah, and everyone calls me the one-armed man behind my back.”
“I don’t think that’s what they’re looking for.”
“I know. It’s just not an easy question to answer,” he admitted. “It means I have to face some things I’ve kind of been avoiding.”
“Like what?” Danni asked.
“Okay, I’ll start slow. The accident changed my relationship with my brother. We’ve always been close, but after that I understood it even more.”
“What do you mean?”
“J.J. is the one who told me I lost my arm,” Darren said.
Danni’s eyes widened. “I didn’t know that.”
“I was in I.C.U. for over a week,” Darren began. “When I came out of there, I got moved down to the fifth floor. I’d been in and out but never awake. When I woke up for real, I got scared because I didn’t remember what happened, and I wasn’t sure where I was. That’s when Justin told me about the car accident and all these images rushed back to me, and I remembered my arm being gone. I started to look, but J.J. wouldn’t let me until he told me the doctors hadn’t been able to save it.
“When I looked down and saw this stump covered in bloody bandages, I just started puking. One of the nurses came in and offered to help, but Justin asked her to leave. He grabbed the plastic tub and held it under me while I puked. Afterward, he cleaned me up and helped me change. Then he looked me right in the eye and promised he’d take care of me and I’d be okay. That’s when it hit me just how much he loved me.”
Danni forgot she was supposed to be writing down what Darren said. She could only stare at him as she tried to imagine him and Justin going through all of that. It must have been awful for Justin to tell his brother he’d lost his arm and then have to watch his reaction. Though she didn’t always get along with Nick, she would never want to see him suffer that way.
“You okay?” Darren asked.
“Sorry,” she said and scratched out a few notes. “What else?”
“It also made me closer to my parents,” Darren said. “I think we all realized how much we mean to each other. We laugh a lot more now, and even my dad tells me he loves me.”
“Anything else?”
“I met you,” Darren said. “I remember when J.J. told me you came to the hospital. It freaked me out that you’d seen me like that. It took me a couple of days to get the guts to ask him if you said anything about my arm, and he said you told him it scared you at first but not enough to keep you away. Anyway, when you kept visiting, I hoped you liked me, but I didn’t think a girl as pretty as you would want to date me.”
“How could you like me?” Danni asked. “I hadn’t even been around that long.”
“I know, but that was just it,” Darren answered. “You sat beside me and held my hand and made me feel like I might be able to have a normal life again. I knew that first day you kissed me that I’d never kiss another girl again. I knew I loved you and could trust you. And when all this embarrassing and bad stuff started happening, you kept telling me you loved me and I could do it. You didn’t do it for me, but you made me think I could. You’re the reason I went back to school even though it scared me to death and I was still hurting from the s
urgery. I knew I could do it because you’d be there for me.”
“You always say the sweetest things.” Danni sighed. “Sometimes I feel like I’m dreaming. I can’t believe Darren Jacobs loves me.”
“Believe it,” he said, leaning in to kiss her on the cheek.
“That seems like the good things,” Danni said as she scanned her notes. “What about the bad stuff?”
“I lost all my old friends,” Darren replied. “I kept waiting for Spence to apologize, but he never said anything, and it hurt a lot. It made me understand just how much I had lost.”
“What did you lose?”
“Everything that made me who I am,” he said. “I used to be this hotshot baseball player and this sensitive artist and the guy all the girls wanted. When I lost my arm I lost all that, and I learned how cruel people can be. Before the accident, everyone wanted to know me and be my friend, and on my first day back at school everyone kept sidestepping me like I scared them or something.”
Danni nodded. “That might get easier to handle.”
“Maybe,” Darren replied. “It’s not just that though. I lost my dignity. Do you have any idea what it’s like to be a seventeen-year-old guy whose mom has to button his pants and tie his shoes? It sucks, and it sucks to have to ask my girlfriend to sneak into the bathroom and help me button my pants. It sucks to have teachers offering to help me and make it easier for me and remind everyone what I am. I hate dreaming of playing ball and holding you in my arms just to wake up and find I’m still a freak.”
“You’re not a freak.”
“Yes, I am. I’m the one-armed man and I hate it,” Darren said. “I’d give anything to go back to that night and change everything.”
“What if you could trade our relationship for the chance to go back and get your arm back, would you do it?” Danni asked.
“Yes,” Darren whispered.
“I would too because I love you that much.” She stood up and grabbed her backpack. “I’ll have your paper finished by Monday.”
“Danni, please wait,” Darren said.
He tried to catch her hand, but she stepped beyond his reach. Danni hurried toward the front door. Just as she threw it open, she ran straight into Darren’s parents. With a mumbled apology, she tried to push past them.
“Danni, are you all right?” Ann asked.
“I’m fine,” Danni lied without looking at her. “I just have to go.”
“Danni,” Darren called from behind her.