Namaste New York: A Novel

  ***

  When Vijay woke at 7 am, Lucky was still asleep, but Raj was no longer in bed. Vijay looked over at the kitchen and saw that Raj was standing over the stove, stirring something in a pot. Raj looked up and saw Vijay staring at him.

  "Good morning!" Raj said cheerfully.

  "Good morning. Did you sleep?" Vijay asked as he stood and began to fold his blanket.

  "No, I couldn't. It must be jet lag," Raj reasoned.

  "So what are you cooking?"

  "Khichadi. I used the ingredients in the cabinet?I hope it's okay," Raj replied.

  "Oh! Definitely, as long as you share," Vijay smiled, enjoying the tantalizing smell wafting from the kitchen. He put his blankets away and went to take a shower. By this time Lucky had woken up, and already there seemed to be a dark cloud over his head. He didn't look at Raj or make any attempt at conversation while he folded his bed and waited for Vijay to be done in the bathroom.

  When Vijay was done, Lucky stomped into the bathroom with barely a greeting, but Vijay wasn't concerned. Today, instead of Parle-G biscuits and tea, Vijay was going to have a delicious breakfast, and he decided he wasn't going to wait for Lucky to finish his shower. He hurriedly spread out newspaper, sat down cross-legged on the floor, and began to eat what Raj had served up in earnest. Raj debated whether to wait on Lucky, but decided he would just offer him breakfast as soon as he got out of the bathroom. He took a seat across from Vijay, and the two enjoyed their meal in friendly silence. They had nearly finished by the time Lucky came out of the bathroom. Raj jumped up immediately and offered him some khichadi, but Lucky declined.

  "What's wrong with you? Last night you set up your bed in Brooklyn, and then this morning you're turning down a tasty breakfast," Vijay said while finishing off the last of his portion. Something was obviously bothering Lucky. He wasn't being himself - not last night on the subway ride home, or when he made his bed, and definitely not this morning. Raj shifted uncomfortably, and slowly sat back down. He really didn't want Vijay to push Lucky about his behavior, but he'd only known them for twelve hours, and he wasn't comfortable intervening in this conversation. The less attention he brought to himself, the better.

  "Nothing is wrong," Lucky snapped at Vijay. Raj kept his eyes on his plate and continued to eat in silence.

  Lucky pulled out one shirt after another, sniffed them, and disgustedly threw them back on the pile. His frustration was growing by the minute, and finally he stood up and kicked the suitcase hard.

  Vijay finally spoke. "Lucky, this behavior is not like you. We're your friends, so you need to tell us what your problem is. Maybe we can help, but you can't just go around turning down delicious food and kicking innocent luggage."

  Raj remained quiet, his stomach twisting with anxiety as he anticipated the questions he was sure Lucky was about to ask. It was quite possible that he wouldn't be allowed to stay another night in the apartment, though that was the least of Raj's worries. Raj slowly raised his head and met Lucky's gaze, prepared for the worst.

  "You want to know what is wrong, Vijay?" Lucky said, looking at Raj.

  "Yes, Lucky, I do."

  Lucky slapped both hands down on his crossed legs, and looked at Vijay. "Dude?I hate this western style of toilet," Lucky said, gesturing and glaring at the bathroom door. Vijay and Raj were wide-eyed and speechless, as neither of them had anticipated the direction this conversation was going. They looked at each other with confusion, and then suddenly Vijay started laughing. It took Raj an extra few seconds, but Lucky's problem became clear to both of them.

  "Do not laugh! I am congested for last three, four days?since I came here. If I eat one more thing, my body will explode like rotten fruit! You are mad at me for setting up my bed in Brooklyn? The next time I need to fart, I will not hold it in, and you will wish I had set up my bed in New Jersey!" Lucky shouted. With this last comment, Vijay and Raj became hysterical, rolling over on their sides and clutching their stomachs as tears rolled down their faces.

  "Come on guys," Lucky pleaded. "Help me! In Indian style you can bend your knees and get good pressure. With American style, you cannot. I think that is the problem."

  Vijay tried to calm down long enough to offer advice. "If you can't bend your lower body, you can bend your upper body or?or maybe sit like a chicken."

  That image sent Raj into hysterics again, but Lucky was considering it carefully. "Not a bad idea," Lucky said, and he got up and went back to the bathroom. Twenty minutes later, Lucky emerged with his hands on his waist and a look of triumph on his face.

  "Raj, any chance there is any khichadi left for me?" Lucky asked. Raj brought him a bowl from the kitchen, and Vijay and Raj sat with Lucky while he ate his breakfast. The look of pride on Lucky's face was so evident that Vijay would have thought that Lucky had single-handedly vanquished the British from India.