Taken, Not Spurred

  On the way, he thought about David and what it meant if he’d been fired by the Statens and then come to the Double C after Kimberly’s death. What had he said? He’d come to slap me with reality and had expected to find me celebrating my not-guilty verdict. Instead, he found me drunk and sinking fast. It wasn’t easy for Tony to look back at that dark time and how close he’d come to ending his own life.

  I wouldn’t be alive today if David hadn’t come to find me.

  He tried to save Kimberly and failed.

  So he saved me.

  A random thought followed and almost made Tony smile. I hope I pay him.

  A few hours later, Tony avoided David and his ranch hands and took off for a long ride on the horse he’d ridden the day he and Sarah had raced. He remembered what Sarah had said about feeling free when she galloped on Scooter. Tony urged his palomino on until he felt the same exhilaration. For just a moment, he was far away from his past and somehow closer to the woman he’d let walk away.

  He stopped his horse on the highest point of his land and admitted a truth that he could no longer deny.

  I miss her.

  The next few days dragged by uneventfully. Tony returned to working with the horses, and his ranch hands went back to pretty much avoiding him. On the surface, things had returned to how they were before Sarah, but Tony was beginning to understand they never really could.

  He’d changed.

  He didn’t want to eat alone anymore. He didn’t want people to look away when he approached and rush off to return to work. He knew their names now and for the first time he watched them work the horses. They were good at what they did, really good. So was David. It was humbling to realize how little credit he’d given any of them for the quality of the final product they sold.

  Tony was in his kitchen drinking a glass of water when Melanie walked in and said, “There’s a man on the phone for you, Tony. I know you say you don’t want to be bothered with calls, but David told me to get you for this one.”

  Who would David think I’d want to talk to?

  Evan? Does he even know I met with him?

  Charles? That’s a conversation with a low likelihood of being pleasant.

  Tony took the phone from Melanie and raised an eyebrow at her. She took the hint and left the kitchen, giving him his privacy.

  “Tony Carlton,” Tony said abruptly and waited.

  “Mr. Carlton.” An enthusiastic male voice echoed his name. “You don’t know what an honor it is to finally get to speak with you. Normally, I don’t get past your ranch manager.”

  Leaning back against his kitchen counter, Tony asked impatiently, “Who is this?”

  In a rush, the man said, “Sorry, my name is Gerry Hamilton. I represent the Dolan Children’s Fund.”

  “David handles donations,” Tony said dismissively, and prepared to hang up.

  “We’re not looking for a donation. Well, not exactly. We’d like you to host a horse expo we’ve been putting together. A big name like you would bring the crowds. All you’d have to do is a couple demonstrations. We’d handle the rest. The proceeds go to our nonprofit foundation . . .”

  “I don’t do public appearances anymore.”

  “Yes, but you’re still a celebrity. People remember you.”

  Unfortunately. “I’m sorry, I wish I could help you, but—”

  “Mr. Carlton, we need you. The Dolan Fund was created by a local widow who wanted to help families with sick children. We work with hospitals throughout Texas to make sure families who need to travel with their children for treatments can afford to. We’ve been doing this for twenty-eight years, but in this economy it’s harder and harder to find donors.”

  Rubbing a hand over his forehead in frustration, Tony said, “How much do you need?”

  “Of course we’d take a cash donation, but this event has the potential of bringing in a significant amount, especially if you agree to host it. Please reconsider the host spot,” the man said urgently.

  Sarah’s voice echoed in his head. “Just being sorry isn’t enough.”

  “Call back and give David all the details and we’ll make this happen.”

  “Thank you so much. You won’t be sorry. This is going to be—”

  Tony hung up the phone on the man.

  On impulse, he dialed Evan Staten’s secretary and asked to speak to him. He was put through, which he took as a sign that what he was about to ask might be well received.

  “Mr. Staten, I’d like to talk to you about an idea I’ve had.” Tony told Evan about the phone call he’d received and how he’d agreed to host the expo for charity. He paused, then added, “I’m considering some demonstrations on how to gentle a horse without violence and possibly give some riding safety tips. With your permission, I’d like to dedicate those demonstrations to Kimberly.”

  At first Evan said nothing, then in an angry voice he demanded, “What makes you think I’d agree to something like this?”

  After inhaling deeply, Tony said quietly, “It’s a good cause and her name will be spoken there regardless of who says it first, me or the press. I think she’d rather be mentioned boldly and have her death help others than be whispered about.”

  After a long pause, Evan said, “That’s exactly what she’d want.” In a much more robust tone, he said, “I’d like to be a part of this expo. If my little girl is going to be there, I want it to be the best goddamn expo the state of Texas has ever seen.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “My wife will be happy when she hears about this. I told her that you came to see me and she cried, but she said it was a good kind of cry. She’ll like this,” Evan said, his voice sounding suddenly certain, like a part of him was coming back to life. “It’ll be good for all of us.”

  I hope so.

  Tony told Evan he’d send him the information, and then he hung up and placed the phone on the counter beside him.

  You did good, Kimberly.

  You did good.

  It was as if a weight had lifted from Tony. I can do this. I may not be able to ever bring Kimberly back, but I can do something in her name that will bring comfort to others. I can be a better man.

  A man who is not afraid to love.

  A man worthy of a woman like Sarah.

  With a smile on his face, Tony went into the barn to look for David, who must have heard him, because he was walking through the barn to meet him. Tony didn’t stop. He walked straight up to him and hugged him. David shoved him away.

  “What the hell is wrong with you? Are you drunk?” David asked.

  “Better than drunk. I’m back.” Tony noticed one of the ranch hands in the background, looking like he wanted—but was afraid—to laugh at the scene. Tony said, “Laugh, I won’t fire you. I may never fire anyone ever again.”

  David turned to the ranch hand and said, “Don’t listen to him. Go clean out the side paddocks.” When the young man didn’t immediately move, David added, “Before I fire you.” That put some speed beneath the young man’s feet.

  Alone with his boss again, David studied Tony’s eyes. “What are you on?”

  Tony shook his head, still trying to label whatever had suddenly made the sun shine brighter and everything seem possible. “Nothing.”

  Looking doubtful, David pushed back his hat and asked, “Are you smiling?”

  I guess I am. “I went to see your old boss the other day, Evan Staten.”

  If possible, David looked even more concerned about Tony’s sanity. “And that put you in a good mood?”

  I can see his point. But the meeting itself was only part of it. “It helped me sort out some things. Sarah was right: being sorry isn’t enough. I need to do something, and I intend to. I’m going to host a charity expo for the Dolan Children’s Fund. Don’t look so surprised—you told Melanie to give me the phone.”

/>   “Yes,” David drawled slowly. “I guess I never thought you’d agree to it.”

  “Well, I did,” Tony said proudly.

  Eyebrows furrowed together, David studied him. “I know, and I’m not sure what that means yet.”

  Tony stepped closer to David, suddenly serious, and said, “I never thanked you for everything you’ve done for me.”

  David took a step back. “Don’t hug me again.”

  Tony smiled. “Invite everyone to dinner tonight at my house. I have a few things I need to say.”

  “I’ll do it even though it goes against my better judgment.”

  Satisfied, Tony almost walked away but then stopped and asked, “Hey, how do you get paid when you don’t have access to my bank accounts? How does anyone here get paid?” He couldn’t believe he didn’t know, but then again, he’d never cared enough to ask. David had always handled the business side, filed the taxes, cut the checks for everyone.

  David took a moment before answering, then said, “I bought the first horses we trained here and started an account with the money we got from selling them. We’ve been splitting the profits since then and paying everyone from that fund.”

  “So you never actually worked for me.”

  David shrugged.

  “No wonder I can’t remember hiring you.” The realization of how detached he’d become from his own life was frightening. “I don’t know why you stayed, but I’m glad you did.”

  David looked away, then said, “Get your overly happy ass out of the barn and find Melanie. She deserves to meet this new you.”

  Tony smiled, imagining the look on Mel’s face when he did. She’ll probably think I’m on drugs, too, but it doesn’t matter.

  Dean had warned him to “wake up” if he didn’t want to die alone like their father would.

  I’m awake, and I’m not wasting any more time.

  I am going to make things right.

  Now where is my favorite angry housekeeper? If she knows where Sarah is, I may have to hug her, too.

  Later that night, Tony, David, Melanie, Jace, and the ranch hands stood in the kitchen of the main house. The men had devoured the country-fried chicken and had moved along to the more serious matter of dessert. Plates in hand, they packed away pieces of Texas sheet cake.

  The initial feeling of euphoria that had followed his conversation with Kimberly’s father had passed, leaving Tony with the reality of what he would have to do to piece his life back together. He cleared his throat. “I wanted everyone here tonight so I wouldn’t have to say this twice. I intend to make some changes around here.”

  The room fell silent, a general apprehension growing as he took a moment to choose his words. Even David looked concerned. “David has done a damn good job running this place, but I’ll be more involved from today forward. I’ll be hosting an expo for the Dolan Children’s Fund sometime in the near future. The coverage will likely be national. Things will change when we open ourselves to the public. I’ve been there. The press runs with whatever you say, so keep your mouths shut. Learn the game, and you might be able to spin these events into a career for yourselves. I don’t mind saying that I want y’all working on this with me. David’s not going anywhere. Y’all, however, need to understand what has changed. I’m going to try real hard to keep my temper to myself, but from this day forward if I fire anyone—there is no way back.”

  David looked on and nodded with approval.

  “Now get out of here while I’m still in a good mood.”

  The ranch hands hastily put their dishes in the sink and retreated.

  Melanie shook her head at his behavior and Tony shrugged, a hint of a smile pulling at one side of his mouth. “I couldn’t let them think I’m getting soft.”

  David chuckled. “There is very little risk of that, but it’s good for them to know that you’ll be watching them, too. They respect your skill with the horses, and now they’ll respect you as their boss.”

  “They won’t be happy at first,” Melanie said, “but they’ll adjust. I’m sure the idea of working on something public like you said will be a real motivator for them, too.”

  “Things are going to change quickly,” Tony said, then pinned Melanie and David with a look. “Which one of you is going to tell me where Sarah is?”

  Melanie looked to David for confirmation that she should. He nodded. “She’s staying with my family in Telson. It’s a couple of hours from here.”

  Tony checked the clock on the wall and was surprised at how late it was. “I suppose I’ll go collect her in the morning.”

  Throwing her hands up for emphasis, Melanie said, “She’s been sitting there for weeks stewing about how it’s over between the two of you. Do you really think you can just go there and pack her up like she’s a horse and bring her home?”

  No? Because I’m a jackass?

  Yes? Because I love her?

  “She loves me,” Tony said.

  Melanie put a hand on one hip and said, “That’s not going to stop her from throwing something at your head if you don’t do this right.”

  Remembering how beautiful his little blonde angel looked with her cheeks flushed and her breasts heaving with anger, Tony said, “I don’t mind a little temper in a woman.”

  Melanie covered her eyes and groaned. “David, don’t let him ruin what could be his only chance to bring her back. I really like Sarah.”

  David held up both hands and said, “What makes me the relationship expert?”

  Forgotten during the postdinner meeting, Jace grabbed Tony’s hand and said, “You should listen to my mama. She knows everything.”

  Melanie ruffled her son’s hair. “You tell ’em, Jace.”

  David said, “My mother always said that God made kids cute when they were little so parents could cling to those memories when they turned into teenagers.”

  “As long as he doesn’t turn out like the two of you, I’ll be happy,” Melanie quipped.

  Tony looked down at his young adviser and said, “Jace, could you go check on the barn with David? I need a moment alone with your mother.”

  Jace hesitated, not letting go of Tony’s hand until he clarified something. “You mad at her?”

  Shaking his head, Tony said, “Not at all.” He smiled down at Jace. “Besides, in a scrap, I’m pretty sure she’d win.”

  David said, “Come on, Jace. Let’s go see how our pregnant mare is doing. She’s looking ready to foal. Maybe tonight. You can name the new one if you’re there.” With one last look at Tony and Melanie, Jace agreed and followed David out the door.

  When they were gone, Tony took out a folded piece of paper and handed it to Melanie. She opened it, gasped, and tried to hand it back to him. “I can’t accept this.”

  “The property sits on the edge of mine. You can keep it or sell it, but I want you to have it. Jace deserves a place he can call his own and so do you. I spent a lot of time thinking over the past few weeks. This ranch has been my sanctuary and my curse—so well insulated from the world that I didn’t have to face what had driven me here. I think it’s been the same for you. It’s not going to be like that once we start dealing with the public again. There’ll be no place to hide. I’m hoping you see this as an opportunity, but if you don’t, you can take the money from that house and buy a place more private.”

  Clasping her hands in front of her, Melanie said, “Are you firing me?”

  “Damn, I’m not good at this, am I? I’m trying to tell you that you and Jace have a home, no matter what changes around here.”

  Eyes glistening with emotion, Melanie hugged the paper to her stomach and said, “You’re a good man, Tony Carlton, and I was wrong. You don’t need my advice. You just go get Sarah. You’ll have no trouble talking her into forgiving you.”

  “I was hoping to keep the actual talking to a minimum,” Tony said w
ith a straight face, then winked.

  Melanie laughed softly, then her expression turned serious and she said, “Just tell her how you feel, Tony, and you can’t go wrong.”

  I will.

  This time I will.

  Sitting at a small wooden desk in the living room of her temporary apartment on Melanie’s parents’ ranch in Telson, Sarah wrote the two most satisfying words across an entire page of her notebook:

  The End.

  She’d written not only one but two short books. No, they weren’t perfect. They needed revisions, but she’d done it. She’d created a world of characters she felt others would enjoy.

  They say write what you know, so I did.

  Tempted (in Texas)

  Torn (in Telson)

  By Breshall Haas

  Sure, Texas isn’t as specific as Telson, but it sounds a whole lot better than Mussed in Mavis. Or Fucked at Fort . . . See, that doesn’t even work.

  Tempted was a powerful title that described the incredible journey she’d been on. A better version of it, anyway. No midnight nervous-fart-releasing laps around a cabin.

  And Torn. Well, any writer will tell you that the worst of what you endure can inspire the best fiction.

  Book three will have to wait until I find my own hero. Or at least until I think of another title that starts with a T besides Tragic.

  She thought back to her first impression of Tony, and the title for the last book in her trilogy came to her: Taken. In the cabin and for a short time following their return from it, she’d glimpsed what it would be like to belong to Tony. In the end, he just wasn’t where she was—and knowing how painful it was to be held hostage by the past made Sarah feel more sympathetic than angry toward Tony. He would have loved her if he’d been capable of it.

  This is not the end of my story. I will have a happy ending because I’m determined to.

  Thank you, Tony.

  I may never have found my voice if I hadn’t found you first. She smiled as she remembered how they’d met. Or you found me. Whatever.