Dishonorably Discharged: A Love Story

  ***

  “You should call Gabe and see if he wants to come too,” I said as I ransacked my closet, looking for the correct blouse to match with my tan heels. Justin and I had decided to get together with our friends for a big dinner, and everyone was invited. It was part of the whole “get out lives back to normal” movement forward.

  I invited Tricia and Rashon, along with Justin’s friend Davis and his wife, to join us for dinner at a PF Chang’s restaurant. It was the first time we had put a dinner group together in over a year. We usually tried to have a big dinner at least once a month to keep everyone in the loop.

  Justin still didn’t have a phone. He had programmed all his numbers in my phone. He grabbed the phone and dialed Gabe.

  “Hey what’s up?” Justin said as Gabe picked up. “Yeah we are doing this dinner tonight. Sorry for the short notice, but I totally forgot to invite you.”

  He paused as he listened, then continued. “Yeah. Try to wear something decent.”

  He paused again as he looked at me. “No, I don’t think any random girls are going to be there. But you can still look nice for my wife and me, you punk.”

  I smiled with approval. The conversation continued.

  “No I’m not saying dress up for another man. You know what? If you’re going to be like that, I can un-invite you. No, it’s cool. I was just trying to show my appreciation for you looking out for me and you totally turned it into something gay.” He paused again as Gabe jockeyed him.

  “Ok, see you at 8:30 punk. Don’t call me babe. That’s for my wife, you weirdo.”

  “So is Gabe confirmed?” I asked.

  “I guess so,” Justin laughed. “But he isn’t sitting next to me.”

  “No, that’s your friend. He isn’t sitting next to my people,” I said as I threw 10 different shirts on the bed. Justin was already dressed.

  “Let’s figure out the seating arrangements right now,” I said. “Who is coming?”

  “You, me, Tricia, Raymond…” he started.

  “Rashon,” I corrected.

  “You, me, Tricia, Rashon, Davis, Mandy, Gabe, and that’s it,” he said.

  “Everyone can sit next to their significant other,” I said. “Tricia can sit between me and Rashon.”

  “I’m not sure Gabe should be sitting next to some dude he never met before,” Justin said with concern.

  “We can put Davis on the other side. It will be fine. Rashon is cool,” I assured.

  “Oh really?” Justin asked.

  “It’s not like that,” I said. “Tricia introduced us. We are all friends. He has some girl he’s talking to. He isn’t interested in me. You’ll like him though. He’s really chill. Kind of like you.”

  “If you say so. Let’s go,” he commanded. It was only 7:45 according to the alarm clock on the dresser.

  “We have time. Chill out. Let me get ready.” I pushed Justin out of the room. He grabbed the laptop to watch YouTube videos as he waited.

  8:30 rolled around and we were late. Of course. Justin gave me a minute-by-minute update on the time as he pressed me to get out of the door. We finally got to dinner about fifteen minutes late and luckily, everyone was waiting outside in separate groups. Rashon and Tricia were chilling together on the bench in front of the restaurant as Davis, his wife, and Gabe loudly horse-played on the concrete sidewalk.

  Tricia was elated to see me. Rashon was uneasy as usual, dressed up in a blazer, light colored V-neck and crisp, dark jeans. In contrast, Gabe wore a poorly ironed polo and jeans. He looked like the total bro he was. Davis, a short white Marine, wore a button down and sported his usual shaved head. His wife, Mandy, was a thick brunette with glasses. She was the typical military wife, having given birth to four babies over the past four years. She was a sweetheart.

  Justin and I greeted our friends and merged the groups as we headed inside. Everyone exchanged uncomfortable hellos as we found our table. As everyone sat down in the order I planned, Justin and I grabbed Gabe by the shoulder and pulled him to the side.

  I whispered to Gabe. “Please don’t embarrass us, Gabriel.”

  He nodded.

  “No jokes, someone here might actually be gay,” Justin added.

  “What? No one’s gay,” I said in a loud whisper.

  Gabe grinned, then responded. “On a one to ten, how far can I go?”

  I gave him the try me face. “Three.”

  Justin and I held hands as we set out to join the party. Gabe ran out in front of us. I knew I should have told him one instead of three.

  ”Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention please!” Gabe yelled. I put my head down.

  “Oh no,” I whispered to Justin.

  “May I introduce to you Mr. and Miss Justin Rowland!” Gabe exclaimed as he applauded us walking arm in arm. Our table joined in the applause and soon, the entire restaurant was applauding us. My brown face was red with embarrassment. Gabe was too slick.

  “Thank you! Thank you! Enjoy your meals!” I said to everyone as we seated. “Gabe I’m going to get you!” I said jokingly.

  Everyone ordered drinks as we prepared for dinner. Gabe plopped down in his seat between Davis and Rashon.

  “What’s up?” Gabe said to Rashon. Rashon greeted him, then quietly browsed the menu.

  “I’m guessing I’m the only person here that doesn’t know anyone,” Gabe said aloud.

  I stepped in. “Davis, you know Gabe, right?” Davis responded.

  “Sadly, I know him.” Davis smiled as he grabbed Gabe by the shoulders. “You’re not making a bad choice ignoring him,” Davis said to Rashon.

  “Oh, I’m not ignoring him. I just don’t know what I want,” Rashon said back.

  “You’re such a spiffy dresser,” Mandy said to Rashon. He was uncomfortable with all the attention. A quiet thank you was all he could muster.

  Everyone scoured through their menus and selected what they wanted. Tricia was uncharacteristically quiet. I leaned into her.

  “What’s wrong? You haven’t spoken all night.”

  She smiled. “Nothing, girl. Believe me, nothing is wrong at all.”

  I studied her face. It said it all. She was getting some action from somewhere.

  “No,” I said. “Not what I think.”

  She blushed. “Momma gotta have a life too,” she said jokingly. I giggled at the comment.

  “That’s disgusting,” Rashon interjected. “I’m about to eat.”

  Tricia snapped back. “It wouldn’t be disgusting if Kimberly was sitting here with you.”

  That hit a sore spot.

  “We’ll she isn’t,” he said solemnly.

  Gabe broke the tension. “Who’s Kimberly? If you don’t mind me asking. Your wifey?”

  Rashon shook his head. “Nah, just some girl. It’s not important.”

  Gabe nodded. “I gotcha. The one that got away, right?”

  Rashon looked on with an understanding gaze as Gabe kept talking.

  “We all have that one that got away, bro. Don’t beat yourself up about it. I’m single too, if any of the ladies were wondering. What’s up, Tricia?”

  “Now that’s disgusting,” I said. The whole table laughed.

  “Nothing is wrong with flying solo,” Justin said to comfort the conversation.

  “True. But it’s overrated,” Rashon responded. “Do you know how much money I spend? You wouldn’t understand. Single guys spend way more money doing things we wouldn’t do if we weren’t single like buying clothes, impressing women, dating…”

  “I won’t buy a chick a glass of water. She’ll be a thirsty bitch messing with me,” Gabe said. I gave him a look that said check yourself. Rashon laughed with him. They seemed to be hitting it off pretty well.

  Tricia chimed in. She was not happy. “That’s because neither one of you can handle a strong woman,” she said.

  “Here we go!” Rashon said as he threw his hands up. Davis and Mandy peered on as if they
weren’t even at the table.

  “Here we go what?’ Tricia said back.

  “What makes you a real woman? Because you work to get free meals from a man you have no intention of ever being with?” Rashon asked.

  Gabe jumped in. “Referee!” he said, looking at me.

  I shrugged. I was used to Tricia going on her tirades.

  “You just got to put yourself out there. You have to date a lot of pigs before you find your Queen,” Justin said to Rashon.

  “Don’t try to earn brownie points,” Gabe said. The whole table went quiet.

  “Oh, my bad. I didn’t mean brownie points like that. I’m brown too. Look at me! Venezuela all day!”

  Everyone laughed at the comment. Our server came to take the orders. She was a cute Hispanic looking girl about our age.

  Tricia nudged Rashon. “There you go!”

  He shook his head. “I don’t holler at females at their jobs. It’s stupid. Nothing ever comes of that.”

  Justin chimed in. “You got to start taking shots. You never know until you know. I thought a black girl would never date me and look, viola!”

  “How did you two meet?” Rashon said to include Davis and Mandy, who hadn’t interjected anything in the crossfire yet.

  “High school,” Davis said proudly as he put his arm around his wife.

  Rashon sighed. “Congrats. You’re smarter than I. You got out the game early. There is nothing to pick from out here. You would be surprised how hard it is to meet people after you leave college and have to be a real adult.”

  “I can imagine,” Davis said. “I’ve heard horror stories.”

  Mandy spoke up. “Everything in a relationship isn’t always perfect. We’ve had our moments when we needed breaks.”

  “You guys look happy,” Rashon complimented. “Enough about me and my problems. How is everyone else doing? What’s new, Tricia?”

  “Nothing much,” Tricia said back. “I’ve been taking care of myself.”

  “Good. Good,” I said. “That’s what’s important. Making sure you are straight before you bring anyone else in your life.”

  Davis interjected. “So how is everything with you two?”

  A dark silence fell upon the table. Justin held his head down as I spoke up.

  “Everything is great. Things couldn’t be better,” I said.

  “They deserted me,” Gabe said jokingly. Everyone laughed.

  “You got the house all to yourself, bro. You can do whatever you want now,” Justin responded.

  “I was going to do that regardless. But man, sometimes I miss my dog. Many I miss my dogs!” Gabe joked.

  “You know what? We need to do something special,” he went on.

  “Waiter, waiter!” he called out as he stood up to get her attention. Our waitress came back to the table, clearly slightly embarrassed.

  “I want to order some shots. On me,” Gabe said. “To Justin! To Kate!”

  “You don’t have to do this,” I said.

  “I insist!” he yelled.

  The waitress brought back the shots on a round holder. Everyone took a glass.

  Rashon spoke up. “I don’t drink.”

  Gabe snatched his glass. “Music to my ears! Double shot for your dog!”

  I put my hand on my head as I whispered to Justin. “It’s going to be a long night.”

  Gabe led the toast as everyone downed shots. “To Justin and Kate!”

  The evening went on as we enjoyed our meals, conversations, and the company of one another. For the first time in a long time, everything felt right. It was a wonderful dinner, minus how drunk Gabe got. He didn’t stop at two shots. He didn’t know how to stop. Justin and I had to give him a ride home. I drove the Mustang with Gabe in the passenger seat as Justin followed us in Gabe’s car.

  “I’m sorry Kate,” Gabe said in a drunken slur. “I think I drank way too much. But let me tell you this. You are a good woman. You are an f’ing good woman. Like, I know what happened. You have to be an f’ing trooper. You deserve an f’ing medal. So many women, especially in this town, would have been banging the next dude they saw. But you didn’t do that. You’re one of the good ones we were talking about. F’ing unicorn. You’re like a beautiful black unicorn.”

  “Stop it, Gabriel. You’re gone,” I said. “There are things you say you’ll never do or put up with until life makes you. You don’t know what you’re capable of getting through until you get to that point.”

  “You’re a solider,” he said as he gazed out of the passenger side window. The yellow haze of streetlights outlined his face.

  “You’re a solider!” he sang, imitating Beyoncé.

  “You’re too much. I appreciate you making the night special,” I said. “Why aren’t you married yet?” I asked him.

  “Bitches, I mean women, are crazy,” he replied in a slur. “Every chick I deal with is crazy, married, or both. I’m not trying to be that other guy bagging someone’s wife then I’m the one hacked up in little pieces in the duffle bag because some crazy Marine can’t take the fact his wife is a slore.”

  I didn’t respond as he went on. “Every woman isn’t like you Kate. A lot of these chicks got secrets and you won’t even find out until you get on Facebook.”

  I replied quietly. “Yeah you’re right. Bitches do be having secrets.”

  11

  Then it happened.

  It began like another regular day but at this point, I should have remembered my life was anything but regular. Justin and I’s move back in together was successful until the day. Everything was going smooth. Justin was working, I was working. We would spend the evenings talking about life and politics while enjoying a home cooked meal. That was, until the day.

  That day was extremely vivid. I got to work barely on time to which I found my co-workers in a panic. We had reports due and everyone was scrambling. I was a little ahead so I picked up the slack where I could. I was the office hero, which never happens. I remember my boss came over to my desk with a big, proud smile and told me, “Kate you’ve been a superstar. I know you can get the job done. I need to evaluate what everyone else is doing though. You are free to go. You have the rest of the day off, with pay.”

  This never happens. It was only 1:35, which normally was 10 minutes before I’d leave for lunch. I got off work early and the ominous day continued. Every light was green all the way home. This was unusual because the light to turn left out of our lot usually takes two or three minutes to change. That day it was smooth sailing, all green all the way home. It was almost like the universe was saying you’re going to deal with this today.

  When I got home, I saw the Furniture Depot truck. At first, I thought nothing of it. People move and buy furniture all the time. I’ve seen that truck all over the complex in the past but that day was different. The Furniture Depot truck was in front of my building. I pulled my car into a parking spot and locked on the truck as I got out.

  “Hey, Foxy,” the loud, rough voice yelled at me from behind. It was him. James. He was coming from the building with a tape measure in hand. His denim jacket didn’t match his dark twill pants, nor the baseball hat he tried to hide his mane under. I tried to play it cool.

  “What are you doing here?” I said with the largest forced smile I ever made in my life.

  “Working. What’s up? Long time, no hear.” He put his hands on his hips as he stared me down. “Everything good with you?” he continued.

  “I’m fine,” I said as I decided whether to try to sprint to my apartment once his back was turned. “How are you?”

  “I got fired from BP for leaving the store unattended that day,” he said.

  “Sorry to hear that.”

  He cut me off as he laughed. “Just kidding, I still work there. I just do deliveries on the side. My brother owns Furniture Depot.”

  I smiled nervously. “Congrats.”

  He chuckled. “Don’t congratulate me, congratulate him. What are
you congratulating me for? For having two jobz!”

  James’ references of black culture were hilarious but so refreshing.

  “So what ever happened with your ex and the dog?” I asked as I folded my arms.

  He shook his head. “Nothing. That’s what happened. I would take her to court but it’s a waste of time. Sometimes you got to move on to bigger and better things.”

  His eyes undressed my chest.

  “Well, it was good to see you. You shouldn’t give up so easily on your dog. Get him back. I know he means a lot to you.” I said nervously as I tried to walk away.

  “Hey Kate, what do you think? Can we hang out again sometime?”

  I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t kn-”

  BOOM!

  I heard my apartment door slam shut. The hair on my arms stood up. My stomach exploded. My knees turned into mush. Justin was here.

  “Hey, babe!” Justin said as he embraced me.

  James silently observed the interaction. I could tell he was determining what the relationship was between Justin and I in his mind.

  “So the ruse is up!” Justin said as he looked at James.

  James held a strong poker face. I damn near fell over.

  “You can’t hide anything from a woman,” Justin said.

  Justin decided he was going to surprise me. He had been saving up a little money by taking extra weekend shifts and decided he was going to take the initiative to order some new furniture for our place and of course he had to order it from Furniture Depot. My little bed was barely enough room for the two of us, but I wasn’t expecting him to actually drop cash on a new bedroom set. If only he and I knew the storm that would start.

  James called my bluff. “So you know Kate, too?” he said to Justin.

  I was had. The look on Justin’s face was one of intimidation and confusion. I was stone cold silent.

  “Yes, I’m her… husband,” he answered James.

  “Oh really?” James said. “I didn’t know you got married. Congratulations.”

  That would normally be a harmless comment if Justin and I hadn’t been married for years and coming off a separation. Point, set, and match. I was done.

  “Well, you two look happy. Congrats again, Kate.” James said as he hopped back in his truck.

  Justin didn’t say a word. His steel cold blue eyes pierced my soul.Once we got inside, the elephant in the room was too big to ignore. Justin was irate.

  Justin screamed at me.

  “Kate! Kate! Don’t ignore me.”

  I hurried to the bedroom. The brand new bedroom set was a slap to the face of my integrity. I had no words, just tears, pain and guilt.

  The tirade continued.

  “You mean this whole time you were making me out to be the bad guy you were sleeping with some loser?!” Justin said.

  “He isn’t a loser,” I replied.

  “I don’t care who he is!” Justin yelled. “Tell me, how long have you been seeing this guy?”

  I tried to calm the situation. “Come on Justin, let’s not go there. We are doing so well right now.”

  “Kate, answer the damn question!” he asserted.

  “I have never slept with him!” I cried back.

  “I don’t believe you. That’s why you were acting so funny that day we were there! Who else were you with while we were separated?” he asked.

  “See Justin, that’s why I didn’t want you to find out,” I said quietly.

  He snapped.

  “Find out what? I thought you didn’t sleep together!”

  I cried loudly. “We didn’t! You need to calm down.”

  He breathed deeply. “Or what! You’ll call the police on me again?”

  BANG!

  He pounded his fist on the round table.

  “A man can only take so much, Kate. I lost my whole life! You were all that I had left. And you just took it for granted.” He grabbed his temples and breathed in and out rapidly as he tried to control his rage.

  I retorted. “As if you didn’t have your fling?”

  His head snapped in my direction like a coiled snake. “I owned up to it. I never ran from it. I told you exactly what happened. You already went through the text messages and all of Facebook. I have nothing to hide!”

  He had had enough. Justin was losing himself. He quickly brushed past me and grabbed his car keys. I didn’t even try to stop him.

  BOOM!

  He slammed the door on his way out. And like that, he was gone.