Lovesick

  She smiled at him.

  He smiled back.

  Scarlet thanked everybody, but gushed with special gratitude for one in particular.

  "I want to thank Eric Smash--or as his friends know him, Electric Eric--for working with me on this song," Scarlet said. "He is a true rock star for doing this and he's here with me tonight, in spirit."

  Eric took a long, deep bow and drank in the applause from the crowd, who couldn't see him, and from his friends--especially Charlotte--who could. He kissed his fingers and pointed at Charlotte to let her know this one was just for her. Pam and Prue nudged her, as she smiled, somewhat embarrassed, but secretly loving it.

  "This song is based on a note I got from a very special someone, who enlisted the help of a very special other someone to write it," Scarlet announced as she strummed her guitar into the song.

  "She did read it," Damen muttered.

  "Charlotte Usher and Damen Dylan, this is for you!"

  Silence fell over the crowd. Scarlet sang and played her guitar and Eric accompanied her. Everyone, including Damen, just assumed she was playing along with a track, but when he looked at his soundboard, hers was not the only hot channel.

  297

  Wherever that beautiful fretwork was coming from, Damen thought, it was definitely live.

  "This song is called 'Kiss Your Kiss,' " Scarlet said as she sang out the first rich, melodic note.

  THOUGHT I KISSED YOUR KISS AWAY

  THOUGHT I LOVED YOUR LOVE TODAY

  SEE THE THINGS YOU SEE MY WAY

  I THOUGHT I KISSED YOUR KISS AWAY

  Damen was transfixed not only by her presence but by what was coming out of her mouth. She was as gifted a songwriter as she was a girlfriend, he thought, singing like a seasoned performer who'd been doing it her whole life. He never saw her so comfortable. It was obvious that she belonged in front of people, playing her music, and he was even more amazed by the fact that it was all for him.

  SAID SOME THINGS I SHOULDN'T SAY,

  NEEDED YOUR NEED TO STAY

  SEE THE THINGS YOU SEE MY WAY

  DID I KISS YOUR KISS AWAY?

  I CAN'T HELP BUT THINK WHEN YOU'RE AWAY FROM ME,

  YOU ARE MY MEANT-TO-BE.

  She sang that bridge with her soul, and Eric played the guitar like a virtuoso, able to evoke emotions and tell a story with his chords and progressions. He was where he belonged up

  298

  there, his life cut too short, and now he was getting his chance, all because of Scarlet. Charlotte was swept away by him; it was as if he was explaining everything to her with just his music. If she wasn't in love with him before, she was now.

  For the last verse, Scarlet walked over to the side of the stage where Damen was watching her from the DJ booth and fixed her eyes on him. She sang the words right to him, and everyone in the room felt their intense energy. Eric walked over to the other side of the stage where Charlotte was standing. He played only for her, and it was clear how Eric felt: he was telling her.

  I THOUGHT I KISSED YOUR KISS AWAY

  THOUGHT I LOVED YOUR LOVE TODAY

  CAN ONLY WISH, HOPE, AND PRAY

  TO NEVER KISS YOUR KISS AWAY.

  I CAN'T HELP BUT THINK WHEN YOU'RE AWAY FROM ME,

  STRAIGHT FROM THE HEART OF A MEANT-TO-BE.

  As she continued the song, Damen took off, running toward the stage. As soon as he jumped up, Scarlet was winding up with a big finish. The crowd was out of control, and so was Damen. He grabbed Scarlet to massive appreciative applause.

  "I'm sorry," he said, holding her in his arms.

  "Me too," she said, smiling, before their moment was interrupted.

  "Wow! Looks like we have a rising star right here at Hawthorne High tonight," the announcer said. "Now, let's see who the star of the prom is!"

  299

  The Wendys ran to the stage, eager to hear the results, anticipating their night to shine. If one of them got Prom Queen, it could be just the thing they needed to start their brand-new future. Like an injured racehorse, Darcy, they figured, had to be scratched, and Scarlet would never allow her name to be placed in the running. It would be between the two of them and Petula, and she had taken such a public beating before voting had concluded that it was hard to imagine her as the winner. It had to be one of them.

  Damen, now back at the DJ booth, only this time with Scarlet on his arm, hit the drum-roll sound effect and the lights dimmed. The Wendys held each other tightly, their eyes shut as they hung on every breath the announcer took.

  "And your queen is..."

  "It will be you," Wendy Anderson said, grasping Wendy Thomas's hand.

  "No, it will definitely be you," Wendy Thomas said, almost breaking skin from the anticipation.

  "Petula Kensington!"

  The roar of surprise rattled the rafters. Apparently, Petula had a few fans left.

  "How in the world did that happen?" Wendy Anderson protested.

  Even Petula was stunned.

  The room exploded in applause and catcalls, text messages, and cell phone flashes.

  "Is this high school," Wendy Thomas screamed in frustration, "or hell?"

  "Voter fraud!" Wendy Anderson howled, nearly apoplectic. "Somebody call the U.N.!"

  300

  Charlotte looked over and saw Virginia giggling at the ballot box, and suddenly it made sense.

  "Looks like Petula's new guide arrived," Charlotte said to Eric, even though he had no idea what she was talking about.

  "We're done here," Pam said proudly, pleased at The Wendys' comeuppance.

  "We were done here," Prue added, taking her buddy's hand, "a long time ago."

  Petula Kensington was queen, and everything was as it should be.

  Pam and Prue flashed Virginia a thumbs-up and made for the exit.

  As the pipe organ music started to play, a group of dapper football players dressed as pallbearers came and picked Petula and Tate up, and carried the happy couple away in open caskets.

  "Let's go dance," Scarlet said, grabbing Charlotte's hand and looking around for Damen. She was standing behind the large speaker cabinets and out of view.

  "No," Charlotte said gently, pointing to Damen, who was walking through the crowd toward her. "You've got someone to dance with. And so do I."

  "Are you still angry with me?" Scarlet asked, a little hurt.

  "How could I be after all this?" Charlotte gestured around the room.

  Eric came up to join them, and Scarlet turned to him to say her goodbye.

  "Thanks for letting me totally be myself around you," she

  301

  said, "so that I could prove to myself that Damen would accept me no matter what."

  "No sweat," Eric said simply. "That's what I was here for. Rock on."

  Scarlet hiked up her dress and exposed a pair of the coolest combat boots ever designed--both were adorned with hundreds of tiny black rhinestones to match her dress and laced up with gorgeous vintage gray satin bows.

  "The official ruby slipper of the rebel."

  Eric smiled, taking her choice in shoes as both a compliment and a victory.

  Scarlet grabbed Charlotte's hands. "It's been quite a ride," she said.

  "You've still got a long way to go," Charlotte said encouragingly. "You've got your whole life ahead of you."

  For Scarlet, the comment was bittersweet, because Charlotte was right. She had her whole life ahead of her, but Charlotte didn't.

  "It's funny, you wanted to disappear and I wanted to be seen," Charlotte noted. "Now, all I want is to disappear from here, and you are definitely going to be seen by millions someday."

  Damen took a break from the DJ booth and walked over to Scarlet.

  "I could never have been myself without you," Scarlet said to Charlotte, but just as she did, Charlotte strategically disappeared. So Scarlet actually ended up saying it to Damen instead.

  Suddenly, she found herself in his arms. Damen pulled her in close for a kiss that was all th
eir own.

  303

  Epilogue I Will Follow You into the Dark

  No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white

  Just our hands clasped so tight

  --Death Cab for Cutie

  304

  You never know.

  We all have ideas about love and death. We keep a close eye out for them our entire lives, seeking one and avoiding the other, knowing all the while that both are mostly beyond our control. It is a both scary and exciting predicament. In the end, it all depends on how you look at it. One thing is for sure; it is never quite what you expect.

  305

  It was a misty dawn and the anxious sun began to push the night up like a yellowing, antique window shade, unleashing a flood of morning light. Everyone had left the prom and was going to the diner for an early breakfast before heading back to their warm beds to sleep the day away.

  Damen was about to drop Scarlet off when she turned to him and kissed his cheek lightly.

  "Tonight was amazing," Scarlet purred.

  "You're amazing," Damen said, grabbing her hand.

  The change they were feeling inside had finally come, not to break them apart but to bring them even closer together.

  Damen got out and opened Scarlet's door gallantly. He wasn't dropping her off at her house like all the other guys, but then again, nothing about their relationship even remotely resembled anyone else's.

  306

  Scarlet got out, gathered her gown, and made her way through the marshy ground, toward the monument.

  "I'll call you later," he said as he watched her hair glisten in the morning light.

  The cemetery was a peaceful place, but especially so in the early morning. Not even the animals were awake yet, so it was more than just quiet. It was silent, except for the familiar voice blending in the breeze as she approached the headstone.

  Just as Scarlet hoped, Charlotte was waiting for her.

  "I forgot to tell you," Charlotte said. "Your song was beautiful."

  "Thanks," Scarlet replied. "I couldn't have done it without Eric."

  "Eric's something else, isn't he?" Charlotte said.

  "He's a great guy," Scarlet advised. "Don't lose him."

  "Right back at you," Charlotte said, smiling.

  "I ended up with the prep, and you ended up with the rocker," Scarlet said. "Ironic, isn't it?"

  "Can't help who you fall in love with," Charlotte said.

  The graveyard was a strange place for a bull session, but under the circumstances, there was something totally right about it.

  "The radio station is going to release our song as a single," Scarlet said. "I'm going to put Eric's name on it with mine," she said. "Kind of an audio memorial to him."

  "I'll tell him," Charlotte said. "He'll die."

  "And all the proceeds will go to the homeless," Scarlet added.

  307

  "I'll bet Petula is excited about that," Charlotte said with a smile.

  "That," Scarlet added, "and her new boyfriend."

  "Of course," Charlotte said. "Same old Petula."

  "Well, not quite," Scarlet joked, acknowledging her sister's evolution. "Thankfully."

  Charlotte knew what she meant, and they both shared a laugh.

  "Tell her she's got a little beauty queen on her shoulder now," Charlotte offered. "Her very own guardian angel."

  "Virginia?" Scarlet sighed happily, knowing how much Virginia's presence would mean to Petula.

  There had been a lot of awkward silences between them this time, like they were talking on satellite delay, but it was not for want of things to say. It was their unspoken way of stretching the moments, slowing things down, making each second with each other last as long as possible.

  "This is the start of it," Charlotte said. "You're going to be a star."

  "I thought you were a ghost, not a prophet," Scarlet said, smiling appreciatively. "It's just a local station."

  "There's nothing local about you," Charlotte said.

  Scarlet nodded and then more silence followed.

  Scarlet felt so grateful that they'd found each other and that Charlotte had found love, not just with her parents, but with Eric too.

  "Will I ever talk to you again?" Scarlet asked, sensing the end was near.

  308

  "Scarlet, I lived my life, now it's time you lived yours," Charlotte said. "This is your time, your memories now."

  "Please don't...," Scarlet pleaded.

  "I love you Scarlet," Charlotte said, unwilling to say goodbye.

  "I love you too," Scarlet said, embracing Charlotte.

  Charlotte smiled and started humming the melody to Scarlet's song, only in a more mournful way, as she turned to her monument. It was eerily beautiful, how she sounded, how she moved; it was otherworldly. Before Scarlet could say another word, Charlotte solemnly walked into the bust Scarlet had commissioned, bringing it to life for a brief moment, and then sank into her grave, the melancholy dirge echoing in the wind.

  "Rest in peace, my friend," Scarlet said, dropping to her knees and this time letting her tears fall to the grass on Charlotte's grave.

  Charlotte woke up to her mother calling her. She shifted back and forth in her bed, trying to sleep off her Hawthorne High hangover.

  "Honey, your friend is here," her mother said, knowing that was just the alarm clock she needed.

  Charlotte shot out of bed and tried to make herself presentable.

  "Hey," Eric said.

  Charlotte was so happy to see him. He'd come to pick her up, just like a real boyfriend would.

  309

  "Mom, Dad," Charlotte said, taking a deep breath. "This is Eric."

  "You know," Eileen said, "Charlotte told me that Scarlet once said that if anyone could find love over here, it's Charlotte. What do you think about that?"

  "I think she's right," Eric said.

  Even Charlotte's dad couldn't keep a smile from breaking out, as he gave Eric an approving slap on the back.

  After saying their goodbyes, Eric and Charlotte walked hand-in-hand to the call center, for what they hoped would be the last time.

  Prue, Pam, and all the others waited anxiously for Charlotte to get there. They wanted to be there to support her, knowing just how hard it was for her to say goodbye to Scarlet.

  "I never thought the departed had to deal with missing their loved ones," Pam said sympathetically.

  Charlotte forced a smile, with a little help from the hand squeeze Eric gave her.

  Green Gary, Polly, Lipo Lisa, Paramour Polly, ADD Andy, and the rest of their intern class were seated and waiting patiently for the little "moving on" ceremony for Charlotte's crew to conclude, so that they could get back to the phones. They'd overheard the stories from the returning spirits and they knew someday, for lack of a better way to say it, they'd get their assignments and their chance to make a difference too.

  Markov came into the room just as everyone's patience was at the breaking point.

  Charlotte smiled, this time more easily.

  310

  "So, did you have a nice trip?" Markov asked her.

  She wanted to get into all the details of the journey, but kept it simple instead. Something she knew he would appreciate.

  "It's something how people think angels are sent to earth to help them," Charlotte began. "It's just as much the living helping the angels though."

  "Eternity with a twist," Markov joked knowingly.

  "It's been a real pleasure working for you," Charlotte said respectfully. "I'll never forget what I learned here."

  "I expect you won't," Markov replied, pleased that he'd gotten through to her and to all of them in the end.

  "We'll miss you," the interns called out in unison, as they prepared to scatter.

  "Good luck to all of you," Markov said. "You may go and so, finally, may I."

  Charlotte's class hugged and laughed, a mixture of happiness and relief that their job was finally done and that they were leaving the call
center in good hands.

  "Everyone except for Usher," a familiar voice called out unexpectedly.

  Charlotte felt her heart sink, and then fill to nearly bursting as she turned to see Mr. Brain. Just as she'd hoped, his old class's departure was a special enough occasion for him to attend.

  "Everyone," Brain said, getting the new interns' attention. "May I present to you your new instructor, Charlotte Usher," he said. "I know she's taught me a lot."

  311

  Charlotte was so honored by the appointment, but most of all she was honored to have finally found the love and the life she'd always wanted.

  The end?

  313Acknowledgments

  I would like to thank the following from the bottom of my heart:

  Isabelle Rose Pagnotta, my biggest dream come true.

  Oscar Martin, for making my life an adventure.

  My mother, Beverly Hurley, for all of her love, dedication, and sacrifices.

  My twin sister and partner, Tracy Hurley Martin, for believing in everything I do, whether she should or not.

  My father, Tom Hurley, for teaching me how to fight.

  My grandparents Martha and Anthony Kolencik for teaching me how to love and to be loved.

  My undying gratitude to my editor, Nancy Conescu, whose enthusiasm and support have made all of this possible.

  Special thanks to all who have helped bring ghostgirl to life: Craig Phillips, Megan Tingley, Lawrence Mattis, Andy McNicol, Alison Impey, Andrea Spooner, Lisa Sabater, Lisa Ickowicz, Lauren Hodge, Tracy Fisher, Melanie Chang, Amy Verardo, Andrew Smith, Tina McIntyre, Jonathan Lopes, Shawn Foster, Chris Murphy, Salvatore and Mary Pagnotta, Denise Carlo, Tom Hurley, Haley Gaydos, Mary Nemchik, Lauren Nemchik, Deborah Bilitski, Clemmie Morton, Vincent Martin, Jean Piazza, and Theresa Flaherty.