The Crab-Flower Club
‘I’m not sitting next to you!’
or,
‘You’re squashing the Mistress’s bundle!’
or,
‘Look, you’ve trodden on my spray!’
or,
‘You’ve ruined my fan, clumsy!’
Zhou Rui’s wife walked up and down calling for some order:
‘Girls! Girls! You’re out in the street now, where people can see you. A little behaviour, please!’
She had to do this several times before the clamour subsided somewhat.
The footmen and insignia-bearers at the front of the procession had now reached the temple, and as the files of their column opened out to range themselves on either side of the gateway, the onlookers lining the sides of the street were able to see Bao-yu on a splendidly caparisoned white horse riding at the head of the procession immediately in front of his grandmother’s great palanquin with its eight bearers. As Grandmother Jia and her party approached the temple, there was a crash of drums and cymbals from the roadside. It was the Taoists of the temple come out to welcome them, with old Abbot Zhang at their head, resplendent in cope and vestments and with a burning joss-stick in his hand.
The palanquin passed through the gateway and into the first courtyard. From her seat inside it Grandmother Jia could see the terrifying painted images of the temple guardians, one on each side of the inner gate, flanked by that equally ferocious pair, Thousand League Eye with his blue face and Favourable Wind Ear with his green one, and farther on, the benigner forms of the City God and the little Local Gods. She ordered the bearers to halt, and Cousin Zhen at the head of the younger male members of the clan came forward from the inner courtyard to meet her.
Xi-feng, whose palanquin was nearest to Grandmother Jia’s, realized that Faithful and the other maids were too far back in the procession to be able to reach the old lady in time to help her out, and hurried forward to perform this service herself. Unfortunately a little eleven- or twelve-year-old acolyte, who had been going round with a pair of snuffers trimming the wicks of the numerous candles that were burning everywhere and whom the arrival of the procession had caught unawares, chose this very moment to attempt a getaway and ran head-on into her. Out flew Xi-feng’s hand and dealt him a resounding smack on the face that sent him flying.
‘Clumsy brat!’ she shouted. ‘Look where you’re going!’
The little acolyte picked himself up and, leaving his snuffers where they had fallen, darted off in the direction of the gate. But by now Bao-chai and the other young ladies were getting down from their carriages and a phalanx of women-servants clustered all round them, making egress impossible. Seeing a little Taoist running towards them, the women began to scream and shout:
‘Catch him! Catch him! Hit him! Hit him!’
‘What is it?’ asked Grandmother Jia in alarm, hearing this hubbub behind her, and Cousin Zhen went forward to investigate.
‘It’s one of the young acolytes,’ said Xi-feng as she helped the old lady from her conveyance. ‘He was snuffing the candles and didn’t get away in time and now he’s rushing around trying to find a way out.’
‘Bring him to me, poor little thing!’ said Grandmother Jia. ‘And don’t frighten him. These children from poorer families have generally been rather spoiled. You can’t expect them to stand up to great occasions like this. It would be a shame to frighten the poor little thing out of his wits. Think how upset his mother and father would be. Go on!’ she said to Cousin Zhen. ‘Go and fetch him yourself.’
Cousin Zhen was obliged to retrieve the little Taoist in person and led him by the hand to Grandmother Jia. The boy knelt down in front of her, the snuffers – now restored to him – clutched in one hand, trembling like a leaf. Grandmother Jia asked Cousin Zhen to raise him to his feet.
‘Don’t be afraid,’ she told the boy. ‘How old are you?’
But the little boy’s mouth was hurting him too badly to speak.
‘Poor little thing!’ said Grandmother Jia. ‘You’d better take him away, Zhen. Give him some money to buy sweeties with and tell the others that they are not to grumble at him.’
Cousin Zhen had to promise, and led the boy away, while the old lady led her party inside to begin a systematic tour of the shrines.
The pages in the outer courtyard, who had a moment before witnessed Grandmother Jia and her train trooping through the gateway that led into the inner courtyard, were surprised to see Cousin Zhen now emerging from it again with a little Taoist in tow. They heard him say that the boy was to be taken out and given a few hundred cash and that he was to be treated kindly. A few of them came forward and led the child away in obedience to his instructions.
Still standing at the top of the steps to the inner gate, Cousin Zhen inquired what had become of the stewards.
‘Steward! Steward!’ shouted the pages in unison, and almost immediately Lin Zhi-xiao came running out from heaven knows where, adjusting his hat with one hand as he ran.
‘This is a big place,’ said Cousin Zhen when Lin Zhi-xiao was standing in front of him, ‘and we weren’t expecting so many here today. I want you to take all the people you need and stay here in this courtyard with them. Those you don’t need here can wait in the second courtyard. And pick some reliable boys to go on this gate and the two posterns to pass word through to those outside if those inside need anything. Do you understand? All the ladies are here today and I don’t want any outsiders to get in. Is that understood?’
‘Yessir!’ said Lin Zhi-xiao. ‘Sir!’
‘Well get on with it!’ said Cousin Zhen. ‘Where’s Rong got to?’
The words were scarcely out of his mouth when Jia Rong came bounding out of the bell-tower, buttoning his jacket as he ran.
‘Look at him!’ said Cousin Zhen irately. ‘Enjoying himself in the cool while I am roasting down here! Spit at him, someone.’
Long familiarity with Cousin Zhen’s temper had taught the boys that he would brook no opposition when roused. One of them obediently stepped forward and spat in Jia Rong’s face; then, as Cousin Zhen continued to glare at him, he rebuked Jia Rong for presuming to be cool while his father was still sweating outside in the sun. Jia Rong was obliged to stand with his arms hanging submissively at his sides throughout this public humiliation, not daring to utter a word.
The other members of Jia Rong’s generation who were present – Jia Yun, Jia Ping, Jia Qin and the rest – were greatly alarmed by this outburst; indeed, even the clansmen of Cousin Zhen’s own generation – the Jia Bins and Jia Huangs and Jia Qiongs – were to be seen putting their hats on and slinking out, one by one, from the shadow of the walls.
‘What are you standing here for?’ said Cousin Zhen to Jia Rong. ‘Why don’t you get on your horse and go back home and tell your mother and that new wife of yours that Her Old Ladyship is here with all the Rong-guo girls. Tell them they must come here at once to wait on her.’
Jia Rong ran outside and began bawling impatiently for his horse. ‘What on earth can have got into him that he should suddenly have picked on me like that?’ he muttered to himself resentfully; then, as his horse had still not arrived, he shouted angrily at the grooms:
‘Come on, bring that horse, damn you! Are your hands tied or something?’
He would have liked to send a boy in his place, but was afraid that if he did, his father would find out when he went back later to report; and so, when the horse arrived, he mounted and rode off home.
Cousin Zhen was about to turn and go in again when he discovered old Abbot Zhang at his elbow, smiling somewhat unnaturally.
‘Perhaps I don’t come in quite the same category as the others,’ said the old Taoist. ‘Perhaps I should be allowed inside to wait on Her Old Ladyship. However. In this inclement heat, and with so many young ladies about, I shouldn’t like to presume. I will do whatever you say. I did just wonder whether Her Old Ladyship might ask for me, or whether she might require a guide to take her round the shrines … However. Perhaps it would be b
est if I waited here.’
Cousin Zhen was aware that, though Abbot Zhang had started life a poor boy and entered the Taoist church as ‘proxy novice’ of Grandmother Jia’s late husband, a former Emperor had with his own Imperial lips conferred on him the title ‘Doctor Mysticus’, and he now held the seals of the Board of Commissioners of the Taoist Church, had been awarded the title ‘Doctor Serenissimus’ by the reigning sovereign, and was addressed as ‘Holiness’ by princes, dukes and governors of provinces. He was therefore not a man to be trifled with. Moreover he was constantly in and out of the two mansions and on familiar terms with most of the Jia ladies. Cousin Zhen at once became affable.
‘Oh, you’re one of the family, Papa Zhang, so let’s have no more of that kind of talk, or I’ll take you by that old beard of yours and give it a good pull. Come on, follow me!’
Abbot Zhang followed him inside, laughing delightedly.
Having found Grandmother Jia, Cousin Zhen ducked and smiled deferentially.
‘Papa Zhang has come to pay his respects, Grannie.’
‘Help him, then!’ said Grandmother Jia; and Cousin Zhen hurried back to where Abbot Zhang was waiting a few yards behind him and supported him by an elbow into her presence. The abbot prefaced his greeting with a good deal of jovial laughter.
‘Blessed Buddha of Boundless Life! And how has Your Old Ladyship been all this while? In rude good health, I trust? And Their Ladyships, and all the younger ladies? – also flourishing? It’s quite a while since I was at the mansion to call on Your Old Ladyship, but I declare you look more blooming than ever!’
‘And how are you, old Holy One?’ Grandmother Jia asked him with a pleased smile.
‘Thank Your Old Ladyship for asking. I still keep pretty fit. But never mind about that. What I want to know is, how’s our young hero been keeping, eh? We were celebrating the blessed Nativity of the Veiled King here on the twenty-sixth. Very select little gathering. Tasteful offerings. I thought our young friend might have enjoyed it; but when I sent round to invite him, they told me he was out.’
‘He really was out,’ said Grandmother Jia, and turned aside to summon the ‘young hero’; but Bao-yu had gone to the lavatory. He came hurrying forward presently.
‘Hallo, Papa Zhang! How are you?’
The old Taoist embraced him affectionately and returned his greeting.
‘He’s beginning to fill out,’ he said, addressing Grandmother Jia.
‘He looks well enough on the outside,’ said Grandmother Jia, ‘but underneath he’s delicate. And his Pa doesn’t improve matters by forcing him to study all the time. I’m afraid he’ll end up by making the child ill.’
‘Lately I’ve been seeing calligraphy and poems of his in all kinds of places,’ said Abbot Zhang, ‘– all quite remarkably good. I really can’t understand why Sir Zheng is concerned that the boy doesn’t study enough. If you ask me, I think he’s all right as he is.’ He sighed. ‘Of course, you know who this young man reminds me of, don’t you? Whether it’s his looks or the way he talks or the way he moves, to me he’s the spit and image of Old Sir Jia.’
The old man’s eyes grew moist, and Grandmother Jia herself showed a disposition to be tearful.
‘It’s quite true,’ she said. ‘None of our children or our children’s children turned out like him, except my Bao. Only my little Jade Boy is like his grandfather.’
‘Of course, your generation wouldn’t remember Old Sir Jia,’ Abbot Zhang said, turning to Cousin Zhen. ‘It’s before your time. In fact, I don’t suppose even Sir She and Sir Zheng can have a very clear recollection of what their father was like in his prime.’
He brightened as another topic occurred to him and once more quaked with laughter.
‘I saw a most attractive young lady when I was out visiting the other day. Fourteen this year. Seeing her put me in mind of our young friend here. It must be about time we started thinking about a match for him, surely? In looks, intelligence, breeding, background this girl was ideally suited. What does Your Old Ladyship feel? I didn’t want to rush matters. I thought I’d better first wait and see what Your Old Ladyship thought before saying anything to the family.’
‘A monk who once told the boy’s fortune said that he was not to marry young,’ said Grandmother Jia; ‘so I think we had better wait until he is a little older before we arrange anything definite. But do by all means go on inquiring for us. It doesn’t matter whether the family is wealthy or not; as long as the girl looks all right, you can let me know. Even if it’s a poor family, we can always help out over the expenses. Money is no problem. It’s looks and character that count.’
‘Now come on, Papa Zhang!’ said Xi-feng when this exchange had ended. ‘Where’s that new amulet for my little girl? You had the nerve to send someone round the other day for gosling satin, and of course, as we didn’t want to embarrass the old man by refusing, we had to send you some. So now what about that amulet?’
Abbot Zhang once more quaked with laughter.
‘Ho! ho! ho! You can tell how bad my eyes are getting; I didn’t even see you there, dear lady, or I should have thanked you for the satin. Yes, the amulet has been ready for some time. I was going to send it to you two days ago, but then Her Grace unexpectedly asked us for this Pro Viventibus and I stupidly forgot all about it. It’s still on the high altar being sanctified. I’ll go and get it for you.’
He went off, surprisingly nimbly, to the main hall of the temple and returned after a short while carrying the amulet on a little tea-tray, using a red satin book-wrap as a tray-cloth. Baby’s nurse took the amulet from him, and he was just about to receive the little girl from her arms when he caught sight of Xi-feng laughing at him mockingly.
‘Why didn’t you bring it in your hand?’ she asked him.
‘The hands get so sweaty in this weather,’ he said. ‘I thought a tray would be more hygienic.’
‘You gave me quite a fright when I saw you coming in with that tray,’ said Xi-feng. ‘I thought for one moment you were going to take up a collection!’
There was a loud burst of laughter from the assembled company. Even Cousin Zhen was unable to restrain himself.
‘Monkey! Monkey!’ said Grandmother Jia. ‘Aren’t you afraid of going to the Hell of Scoffers when you die and having your tongue cut out?’
‘Oh, Papa and I say what we like to each other,’ said Xi-feng. He’s always telling me I must “acquire merit” and threatening me with a short life if I don’t pay up quickly. That’s right, isn’t it Papa?’
‘As a matter of fact I did have an ulterior motive in bringing this tray,’ said Abbot Zhang, laughing, ‘but it wasn’t in order to make a collection, I assure you. I wanted to ask this young gentleman here if he would be so very kind as to lend me the famous jade for a few minutes. The tray is for carrying it outside on, so that my Taoist friends, some of whom have travelled long distances to be here, and my old students, and their students, all of whom are gathered here today, may have the privilege of examining it.’
‘My dear good man, in that case let the boy go with it round his neck and show it to them himself!’ said Grandmother Jia. ‘No need for all this running to and fro with trays – at your age, too!’
‘Most kind! Most considerate! – But Your Old Ladyship is deceived,’ said the abbot. ‘I may look my eighty years, but I’m still hale and hearty. No, the point is that with so many of them here today and the weather so hot, the smell is sure to be somewhat overpowering. Our young friend here is certainly not used to it. We shouldn’t want him to be overcome by the – ah – effluvia, should we?’
Hearing this, Grandmother Jia told Bao-yu to take off the Magic Jade and put it on the tray. Abbot Zhang draped the crimson cloth over his hands, grasped the tray between satin-covered thumbs and fingers, and, holding it like a sacred relic at eye level in front of him, conveyed it reverently from the courtyard.
Grandmother Jia and the others now continued their sight-seeing. They had finished with everything
at ground level and were about to mount the stairs into the galleries when Cousin Zhen came up to report that Abbot Zhang had returned with the jade. He was followed by the smiling figure of the abbot, holding the tray in the same reverential manner as before.
‘Well, they’ve all seen the jade now,’ he said, ‘– and very grateful they were. They agreed that it really is a most remarkable object, and they regretted that they had nothing of value to show their appreciation with. Here you are! – this is the best they could do. These are all little Taoist trinkets they happened to have about them. Nothing very special, I’m afraid; but they’d like our young friend to keep them, either to amuse himself with or to give away to his friends.’