Guarding the Broken
I gasped for breath as his mouth pulled away from mine, travelling down my neck. With my eyes closed, my hands slipped down to his ass, squeezing gently as I tangled my legs with his. “Damn, you have such an incredible ass,” I mumbled.
He chuckled, finally pulling his mouth away from my skin. Pressing his forehead to mine, his eyes locked onto mine as he cupped my face in his hands. His breathing was heavy; it blew across my face and ruffled my hair. “You need to stop drinking,” he mused. “You’re a damn horny drunk.” He smiled his sexy smile at me and my whole body seemed to come alive with passion.
“Wanna take me home to bed, Ashton?” My hormones were raging. I needed him. I chewed on my lip as I started to play it out in my head. I couldn’t help but wonder if it would be as enjoyable as last time, or whether I had maybe distorted the experience in my head, and it wasn’t actually as mind blowing as I thought it was. Maybe I’d be disappointed this time.
“That’s not going to happen,” he answered, shifting so that there was an inch of space between us.
I raised one eyebrow suggestively. “Not even if I beg you on my knees?” I countered.
He groaned, looking like he was in pain. “Anna, please, you’re making this hard for me,” he whined, looking at me hungrily.
“Isn’t that the point?” I joked, giggling wickedly. Actually, I would gladly beg on my knees if he’d enjoy that.
His fingers dug into my waist as he shook his head. “Enough,” he said sternly, looking directly into my eyes. There was no wavering in his tone; he wasn’t going to change his mind.
I frowned at his rejection. It felt like a slap in the face. Did he not enjoy the other morning? Wait… am I terrible in bed or something? Had I done something wrong, or not done something? My mouth popped open and my face flushed with embarrassment.
His hands slid down my neck, across my shoulders and down my arms until they got to my hands. I gulped, still embarrassed as his fingers tangled with mine and he stepped back, smiling weakly.
“You two need a room or something?”
The comment made me jerk back into reality, and I realised we were in a bar, and not in private. Everyone and everything else seemed to disappear when I was kissing Ashton. Flicking my eyes over Ashton’s shoulder, I saw Tim and Rich fake gagging.
I giggled and bit my lip, unsure what to say. Ashton, on the other hand, obviously knew exactly what he should be saying. “Actually, yeah. I think I’m gonna take her home and finish this there. Nice to meet you guys.” He turned back to me and gave me a little tug away from the wall, holding me steady when I swayed on my feet. “Can you walk in a straight line?”
I raised one eyebrow. Clearly, he was implying I was intoxicated. “Yes, Officer, I can,” I flirted, winking at him. He chuckled but luckily no one else commented on the double meaning. He nodded and let go of my hands, watching me as my legs wobbled as if I was wearing high heels, even though I had flat sandals on.
Laughing, he quickly gripped my waist as the floor started to slope off to one side. “I’ll give you a piggyback.”
He lifted me, sitting me on the bar stool next to me before turning his back on me, bending and wrapping my arms around his neck. As his hands slipped under my behind, lifting me off the stool, fumbling to get a decent hold on me, I giggled wickedly.
“Not sure what you’re looking for there, Pretty Boy, but it’s slightly to the left,” I joked. Everyone burst out laughing and I blushed. “Oops, did I say that out loud?” I pressed my face into his neck as everyone laughed harder.
After sending a triumphant smirk in Monica’s direction, I waved and chirped goodbye to everyone else that we’d spent the evening with. The air was refreshing as Ashton carried me out of the bar and into the street. Dean was sitting on the wall outside the bar, playing on his phone under the haze of a street light. He looked up and stood as we walked out. His gaze wandered to me on Ashton’s back, and a small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth.
I had no idea how long it took to get home. Most of the time I just had my eyes closed and my head resting on Ashton’s shoulder as he walked with long, confident strides. He and Dean were talking about basketball.
As we got into the lobby of our apartment building, Peter, the night guard, came walking down the stairs to meet us. No doubt Dean had called him to tell him his shift was starting when we got back.
Ashton carried me right into my bedroom, finally setting me on my feet and looking at me worriedly. “Can you stand okay?” He reached out, gripping my elbow.
I giggled and slapped his hand away playfully. “I’m not drunk,” I protested, plopping heavily down onto the bed and giggling as the mattress bounced, making me feel a little lightheaded. Raising one foot, I tried to unbuckle my sandals, but my fingers wouldn’t do what I told them to do.
Ashton laughed loudly, taking my foot and easily pulling the strap off for me before doing the other. “Which case are your pyjamas in?” he asked, walking over to the two cases in the corner of the room.
I actually had no idea. Did I even bring pyjamas? I guess I must have done. “Um, I don’t know. I’ll just sleep naked,” I suggested, waving my hand dismissively at the case full of clothes.
He closed his eyes for a couple of seconds. “Give me a break here. Do you honestly not know which one they’re in?” he asked, shaking his head and rifling through the clothes carefully.
“Nope.” I laughed, popping the p and smiling broadly. Hopefully if I’m sleeping naked, I’ll be able to convince him to ditch the clothes too. He sighed and zipped the case back up. As he stood up, he gripped his T-shirt, pulling it off over his head, exposing those edible abs and chest that made my mouth water.
He threw the T-shirt at me, hitting me full in the face with it. “Sleep in that. I’m gonna go check the doors and windows and stuff.” He turned and walked out the door, closing it behind him.
I burst out laughing at his second rejection. Embarrassment washed over me because I was just lusting after him and he wasn’t even slightly interested. Obviously I hadn’t learnt from my rejection at the bar!
Shaking my head at myself, I tugged off my clothes, leaving my underwear on, and slipped his shirt over my head. As soon as I had it on, I moaned in appreciation. It smelt incredible, just like he did. Pulling the neck of the shirt up over my nose, I climbed in the bed, surrounding myself with his scent.
He strutted in moments later, carrying the bedcovers from the room next door. His eyes were tight before he spotted me in the bed. I whipped my mouth and nose out of his shirt, but it was too late, he’d seen it. A smile slipped onto his face as I squirmed at being caught. It was almost as pathetic as if I’d just been leaning in and sniffing his hair or something. Bet his subconscious was screaming the word ‘stalker’ at him.
“Doors and windows all locked?” I asked, rolling onto my side to watch him take off his jeans and socks.
“Yeah, you’re all safe,” he replied.
“Of course I am, I have a big, bad boyfriend to look after me,” I flirted, dragging my eyes down his body. He sighed and spread the sheet out onto the floor before walking around to the other side of my bed, picking up the spare pillow. Catching on to his intention, I shook my head. “You can sleep in the bed,” I protested.
He shook his head, tossing the pillow down onto the floor. “That’s not a good idea tonight.”
I frowned. “Why not?”
“Because you, plus alcohol, clearly equals horny beast,” he threw at me before flicking off the light, surrounding us with darkness.
I frowned, listening to the rustling of him settling himself down onto the makeshift bed on the floor. I rolled to my side, squinting through the darkness, seeing that he was lying on his back. “I was hoping you’d want to sleep in bed with me tonight,” I whined, after a few minutes of silence.
“I do.”
Fumbling with the bedside light switch, I turned it on, narrowing my eyes at the sudden brightness. He groaned, cupping his hands aroun
d his eyes too. “Then why don’t you, if you want to?” I asked.
“There’s a difference between what I want, and what can happen. You’re drunk and you need some sleep. If I got in the bed with you, then stuff might happen and you’d hate me in the morning for taking advantage of you. I refuse to do that.” His tone was final and stern. I pouted, and he chuckled wickedly. “You have the cutest little puppy dog face I have ever seen.” He shook his head, smiling up at me.
“If I promise not to make a move on you, can I sleep with you?” I begged. After two rejections and someone flirting with him, the alcohol was making me insecure. I needed to know that he wasn’t going anywhere; I needed reassurance that he wasn’t going to walk out of my life like everyone else did.
He looked pained, like he wanted to but thought that he shouldn’t. “I don’t think you can keep that promise.”
I scoffed, making my mind up that I was going to prove him wrong. “You’re not that hot, Agent!” I protested.
“You think I am,” he shot back cockily.
I gasped and shook my head. “I’m pretty sure I can resist your hot ass. And I’ll prove it.” I threw off the sheets and swung my legs out of the bed. He grunted when I almost stood on him and then stumbled, falling down at his side and accidentally bumping his head with mine. “Shit. Ouch. Sorry,” I grumbled, sitting up and rubbing at my forehead.
He laughed, rubbing his head too, watching me curiously. “You alright? Where are you going?”
I rolled my eyes and pulled his pillow to the side so that there was some room for me to share it. “I’m proving my point that you’re not, in fact, as irresistible as you think you are.” I settled down on his sheet, and closed my eyes, waiting for him to lie back down too.
“Anna…”
I shook my head and patted the empty side again. “Lie down and shh. My hangover has started to kick in, so shut up and cuddle me,” I instructed, trying not to laugh.
He chuckled, shifting onto his side before settling himself down so he was facing me. I held my breath and prayed that he couldn’t see the effect that he had on my body. His beautiful green eyes were trying to hypnotise me, I could feel them pulling me in. I sighed deeply and scooted closer to him. The smile that graced his lips was beautiful as he shifted and moved one arm to the side, slipping it under my neck before wrapping it around me tightly.
With his beautiful, unique scent filling my lungs and the heat seeping from his skin to mine, my body relaxed for the first time in two days. Ashton just had this strange ability to make me feel whole, like I wasn’t broken anymore, like he was some sort of magical cure that I just couldn’t get enough of. He made all the terrible things seem to fade away, at least for a little while anyway. Setting my head on his chest, I tangled my legs in with his as he kissed the top of my head before turning off the light again.
It was easy to imagine while he was holding me like this that everything was normal, that he was really my boyfriend, that he wasn’t just doing his job, and that I wasn’t some screwed up, dirty piece of trash that would never be loved again.
When his breathing deepened and the soft snores resonated from his chest, I pulled back slightly so I could look at him properly. My heart was hammering in my chest as butterflies seemed to take flight in my stomach as I raked my eyes over his handsome face. I reached out a hand and brushed my finger tip across his cheekbone, tracing along the line of his jaw, smiling at the prickle of his five o’clock shadow. I’d done the same last night; it was like I just needed to touch him to make sure he was real or something.
He truly was handsome. I didn’t think I’d ever seen anyone so perfect, and he was such a lovely guy to go with it. It would have been so much easier if he were a jerk. I really hoped that I could keep this boy out of my heart, otherwise in eight months when he left for the stupid front line or whatever the hell he wanted to do, I was going to have another serious problem.
Chapter Fifteen
As I slowly started to drift into consciousness, the first thing I noticed was that my head was pounding. I groaned and rolled over, pressing my face into the pillow, trying to block out the light. My stinging eyes cracked open and raked around the room. Not recognising anything, I jerked up quickly with a horrible sensation brewing in the pit of my stomach. The last time I woke up not knowing where I was, I’d been with Carter.
I jumped to my feet and pressed myself against the wall as my breathing started to accelerate. The muscles in my body ached, as if I’d slept awkwardly or something. Slowly, it started coming back to me. College, I was at ASU with Ashton, and this was our new apartment. I breathed a sigh of relief and relaxed, resting my head back against the wall. My eyes fluttered closed again and I groaned as another wave of pain started in my head. How much did I drink last night? Jeez! I remembered having about four or five doubles, then we met a couple of guys and played pool. What were their names? Tim and someone else, and two girls…
One of the girls was flirting with Ashton, and I got jealous and… oh no, I kissed him! I was all over him and begging him to take me home and… oh God no. I basically begged him for sex when we got back too! My cheeks flamed from the shame of what I’d done last night and how much I’d flirted with him. Thank goodness he’d said no though, not many guys would have turned down a free score, I’d bet. I’d have to thank him today for that because if I’d slept with him again, I was pretty sure I’d be feeling guilty over Jack again afterwards. I covered my face with my hands in disgust. I really had no self-control, and I should have been thinking about Jack last night, not myself.
After a few deep breaths, I decided I should go and see if we were okay this morning after that. Maybe my drunken antics had frightened him away and he’d request that transfer that he was so adamant he wouldn’t be asking for. The smell of coffee and toast drifting from the kitchen made my stomach rumble as I made my way out of the bedroom and into the kitchen. As I stepped into the room, I stopped. It wasn’t just Ashton in there, Dean and a guy I vaguely recognised as Peter, the night guard, were there too. They were all standing around the kitchen island, drinking coffee.
“Good morning,” Ashton chirped, smiling as he spotted me.
I waved a hand in response. He grinned and nodded down at my legs for some reason as if trying to tell me something. My gaze drifted down, confused, until I spotted that I was only wearing his T-shirt. Heat flooded my face for the second time in a few minutes as I realised that they were all looking at me. I grabbed the bottom of the T-shirt, trying to pull it down further; it already came to my mid-thigh, but I felt exposed in front of the other two. I actually didn’t care if Ashton saw me like this. He’d seen me in much, much less.
“Um, hi. Sorry, I didn’t know you guys were here.” I winced, smiling apologetically.
“Don’t worry about it, Miss Spencer,” the new guard replied, looking me over slowly with an appreciative look on his face.
I frowned at his obviousness. “My eyes are up here, Agent!” I snapped acidly, pointing to my face.
Ashton’s body tensed as he stepped to my side, glaring at Peter warningly. I moved closer to him, trying to discreetly hide behind him as he spoke. “Agent Burnet, I appreciate that you might want to keep the relationship of bodyguard and client informal, but that shit stops right now, understand? Plenty of other Agents would love a cushy job like yours, so if you want to keep your position, I suggest you be a little more respectful,” he stated, his voice angry and full of authority.
Peter jumped, looking a little taken aback as he nodded in agreement. “Right. I’m sorry, Miss Spencer,” he apologised nervously.
I laughed uncomfortably. “Don’t worry about it,” I told Peter, waving it off. “But can everyone just shush, please?” I winced and looked longingly at the coffee, trying to decide if I could be bothered to make the four steps over to it to pour some for myself.
Ashton’s shoulders loosened as he smiled down at me before picking up a glass from the side and pouring me a glass of wat
er. “Suffering after last night?” he teased, nudging me in the side and setting the glass of water and two pills in front of me.
“Thanks.” I smiled gratefully, swallowing them quickly.
“So, what’s on the agenda for today? Do I have anything I need to do, or can I unpack?” Ashton asked, as he poured me a coffee.
I frowned. “I don’t know. We need to go grocery shopping, I guess, but I need to unpack too, I don’t have any clothes for today. I mean, why the hell am I wearing your shirt?” I asked, looking at him curiously. All three of them laughed again.
“You were drunk. I couldn’t find your pyjamas, so I let you borrow my shirt,” Ashton explained, shrugging casually, but the tiny tightening to his eyes showed me how uncomfortable he was.
Flashbacks of me suggesting we sleep naked flashed into my brain, so I quickly averted my eyes from his. Dear God, what is wrong with me lately? “Right okay, well thanks.”
“No problem. So, if we unpack first, then maybe go grocery shopping this afternoon?” he offered. I nodded, liking the idea of having a few hours to chill in the apartment; hopefully my hangover from hell would be gone by then. “Did you want to go to that party tonight?” he asked curiously.
“Party? What party?” I didn’t know anything about a party.
He shook his head, smiling. “Tim, the guy who liked you last night, asked us to go to a party tonight at a bar. You had a whole conversation about it with him. There’s a band and DJ, apparently,” he explained, shrugging easily.
I frowned. A party invite didn’t ring any bells with me so I must have been more intoxicated than I thought last night. “Do you want to go?” I asked, watching his face. I didn’t actually want to go, but I knew that I needed to start thinking of him more. I couldn’t trap him in with me twenty-four-seven for the next eight months, he’d go stir crazy.