Pan Michael: An Historical Novel of Poland, the Ukraine, and Turkey

  CHAPTER XI.

  All the nights that Pan Michael had spent were nothing in comparisonwith the night after that adventure with Krysia. For, behold, he hadbetrayed the memory of his dead one, and he loved that memory. He haddeceived the confidence of the living woman, had abused friendship, hadcontracted certain obligations, had acted like a man withoutconscience. Another soldier would have made nothing of such a kiss, or,what is more, would have twisted his mustache at thought of it; but PanMichael was squeamish, especially since the death of Anusia, as isevery man who has a soul in pain and a torn heart. What was left forhim to do, then? How was he to act?

  Only a few days remained until his departure; that departure would cutshort everything. But was it proper to go without a word to Krysia, andleave her as he would leave any chamber-maid from whom he might steal akiss? The brave heart of Pan Michael trembled at the thought. Even inthe struggle in which he was then, the thought of Krysia filled himwith pleasure, and the remembrance of that kiss passed through him witha quiver of delight. Rage against his own head seized him; still hecould not refrain from a feeling of sweetness. And he took the wholeblame on himself.

  "I brought Krysia to that," repeated he, with bitterness and pain; "Ibrought her to it, therefore it is not just for me to go away without aword. What, then? Make a proposal, and go away Krysia's betrothed?"

  Here the form of Anusia stood before the knight, dressed in white, andpale herself as wax, just as he had laid her in the coffin. "This muchis due me," said the figure, "that you mourn and grieve for me. Youwished at first to become a monk, to bewail me all your life; but nowyou are taking another before my poor soul could fly to the gates ofheaven. Ah! wait, let me reach heaven first; let me cease looking atthe earth."

  And it seemed to the knight that he was a species of perjurer beforethat bright soul whose memory he should honor and hold as sacred.Sorrow and immeasurable shame seized him, and self-contempt. He desireddeath.

  "Anulya,"[11] repeated he, on his knees, "I shall not cease to bewailthee till death; but what am I to do now?"

  The white form gave no answer to that as it vanished like a light mist;and instead of it appeared in the imagination of the knight Krysia'seyes and her lip covered with down, and with it temptations from whichthe knight wished to free himself. So his heart was wavering inuncertainty, suffering, and torment. At moments it came to his head togo and confess all to Zagloba, and take counsel of that man whosereason could settle all difficulties. And he had foreseen everything;he had told beforehand what it was to enter into "friendship" with fairheads. But just that view restrained the little knight. He recollectedhow sharply he had called to Pan Zagloba, "Do not offend Panna Krysia,sir!" And now, who had offended Panna Krysia? Who was the man who hadthought, "Is it not best to leave her like a chamber-maid and go away?"

  "If it were not for that dear one up there, I would not hesitate amoment," thought the knight, "I should not be tormented at all; on thecontrary, I should be glad in soul that I had tasted such delight."After a while he muttered, "I would take it willingly a hundred times."Seeing, however, that temptations were flocking around him, he shookthem off again powerfully, and began to reason in this way: "It is allover. Since I have acted like one who is not desirous of friendship,but who is looking for satisfaction from Cupid, I must go by that road,and tell Krysia tomorrow that I wish to marry her."

  Here he stopped awhile, then thought further thuswise: "Through whichdeclaration the confidence of to-day will become quite proper, andto-morrow I can permit myself--" But at this moment he struck his mouthwith his palm. "Tfu!" said he; "is a whole chambul of devils sittingbehind my collar?"

  But still he did not set aside his plan of making the declaration,thinking to himself simply: "If I offend the dear dead one, I canconciliate her with Masses and prayer; by this I shall show also that Iremember her always, and will not cease in devotion. If people wonderand laugh at me because two weeks ago I wanted from sorrow to be amonk, and now have made a declaration of love to another, the shamewill be on my side alone. If I make no declaration, the innocent Krysiawill have to share my shame and my fault. I will propose to herto-morrow; it cannot be otherwise," said he, at last.

  He calmed himself then considerably; and when he had repeated "OurFather," and prayed earnestly for Anusia, he fell asleep. In themorning, when he woke, he repeated, "I will propose to-day." But it wasnot so easy to propose, for Pan Michael did not wish to inform others,but to talk with Krysia first, and then act as was proper. MeanwhilePan Adam arrived in the early morning, and filled the whole house withhis presence.

  Krysia went about as if poisoned; the whole day she was pale, worried,sometimes dropped her eyes, sometimes blushed so that the color went toher neck; at times her lips quivered as if she were going to cry; thenagain she was as if dreamy and languid. It was difficult for the knightto approach her, and especially to remain long alone with her. It istrue he might have taken her to walk, for the weather was wonderful,and some time before he would have done so without any scruple; but nowhe dared not, for it seemed to him that all would divine on the spotwhat his object was,--all would think he was going to propose.

  Pan Adam saved him. He took Pani Makovetski aside, conversed with her agood while touching something, then both returned to the room in whichthe little knight was sitting with the two young ladies and PanZagloba, and said, "You young people might have a ride in two sleighs,for the snow is sparkling."

  At this Pan Michael inclined quickly to Krysia's ear and said, "I begyou to sit with me. I have a world of things to say."

  "Very well," answered Krysia.

  Then the two men hastened to the stables, followed by Basia; and in thespace of a few "Our Fathers," the two sleighs were driven up before thehouse. Pan Michael and Krysia took their places in one. Pan Adam andthe little haiduk in the other, and moved on without drivers.

  When they had gone, Pani Makovetski turned to Zagloba and said, "PanAdam has proposed for Basia."

  "How is that?" asked Zagloba, alarmed.

  "His godmother, the wife of the chamberlain of Lvoff, is to come hereto-morrow to talk with me; Pan Adam himself has begged of me permissionto talk with Basia, even hintingly, for he understands himself that ifBasia is not his friend, the trouble and pains will be useless."

  "It was for this that you, my benefactress, sent them sleigh-riding?"

  "For this. My husband is very scrupulous. More than once he has said tome, 'I will guard their property, but let each choose a husband forherself; if he is honorable, I will not oppose, even in case ofinequality of property.' Moreover, they are of mature years and cangive advice to themselves."

  "But what answer do you think of giving Pan Adam's godmother?"

  "My husband will come in May. I will turn the affair over to him; but Ithink this way,--as Basia wishes, so will it be."

  "Pan Adam is a stripling!"

  "But Michael himself says that he is a famous soldier, noted alreadyfor deeds of valor. He has a respectable property, and his godmotherhas recounted to me all his relations. You see, it is this way: hisgreat-grandfather was born of Princess Senyut; he was married the firsttime to--"

  "But what do I care for his relations?" interrupted Zagloba, not hidinghis ill-humor; "he is neither brother nor godfather to me, and I tellyour ladyship that I have predestined the little haiduk to Michael; forif among maidens who walk the world on two feet there is one better ormore honest than she, may I from this moment begin to walk on all-fourlike a bear!"

  "Michael is thinking of nothing yet; and even if he were, Krysia hasstruck his eye more. Ah! God, whose ways are inscrutable, will decidethis."

  "But if that bare-lipped youngster goes away with a water-melon,[12] Ishall be drunk with delight," added Zagloba.

  Meanwhile in the two sleighs the fates of both knights were in thebalance. Pan Michael was unable to utter a word for a long time; atlast he said to Krysia, "Do not think that I am a frivolous man, orsome kind of fop, for not su
ch are my years."

  Krysia made no answer.

  "Forgive me for what I did yesterday, for it was from the good feelingwhich I have for you, which is so great that I was altogether unable torestrain it. My gracious lady, my beloved Krysia, consider who I am; Iam a simple soldier, whose life has been passed in wars. Another wouldhave prepared an oration beforehand, and then come to confidence; Ihave begun with confidence. Remember this also, that if a horse, thoughtrained, takes the bit in his teeth and runs away with a man, whyshould not love, whose force is greater, run away with him? Lovecarried me away, simply because you are dear to me. My beloved Krysia,you are worthy, of castellans and senators; but if you do not disdain asoldier, who, though in simple rank, has served the country not withoutsome glory, I fall at your feet, I kiss your feet, and I ask, do youwish me? Can you think of me without repulsion?"

  "Pan Michael!" answered Krysia. And her hand, drawn from her muff, hiditself in the hand of the knight.

  "Do you consent?" asked Volodyovski.

  "I do!" answered Krysia; "and I know that I could not find a morehonorable man in all Poland."

  "God reward you! God reward you, Krysia!" said the knight, covering thehand with kisses. "A greater happiness could not meet me. Only tell methat you are not angry at yesterday's confidence, so that I may findrelief of conscience."

  "I am not angry."

  "Oh that I could kiss your feet!" cried Pan Michael.

  They remained some time in silence; the runners were whistling on thesnow, and snowballs were flying from under the horse's feet. Then PanMichael said, "I marvel that you regard me."

  "It is more wonderful," answered Krysia, "that you came to love me soquickly."

  At this Pan Michael's face grew very serious, and he said, "It may seemill to you that before I shook off sorrow for one, I fell in love withanother. I own to you also, as if I were at confession, that in my timeI have been giddy; but now it is different. I have not forgotten thatdear one, and shall never forget her; I love her yet, and if you knewhow much I weep for her, you would weep over me yourself."

  Here voice failed the little knight, for he was greatly moved, andperhaps for that reason he did not notice that these words did not seemto make a very deep impression on Krysia.

  Silence followed again, interrupted this time by the lady: "I will tryto comfort you, as far as my strength permits."

  "I loved you so soon," said Pan Michael, "because you began from thefirst day to cure my wounds. What was I to you? Nothing! But you beganat once, because you had pity in your heart for an unfortunate. Ah! Iam thankful to you, greatly thankful! Who does not know this willperhaps reproach me, since I wished to be a monk in November, and ampreparing for marriage in December. First, Pan Zagloba will be ready tojeer, for he is glad to do that when occasion offers; but let the manjeer who is able! I do not care about that, especially since thereproach will not fall on you, but on me."

  Krysia began to look at the sky thoughtfully, and said at last, "Mustwe absolutely tell people of our engagement?"

  "What is your meaning?"

  "You are going away, it seems, in a couple of days?"

  "Even against my will, I must go."

  "I am wearing mourning for my father. Why should we exhibit ourselvesto the gaze of people? Let our engagement remain between ourselves, andpeople need not know of it till you return from Russia. Are yousatisfied?"

  "Then I am to say nothing to my sister?"

  "I will tell her myself, but after you have gone."

  "And to Pan Zagloba?"

  "Pan Zagloba would sharpen his wit on me. Ei, better say nothing! Basiatoo would tease me; and she these last days is so whimsical and hassuch changing humor as never before. Better say nothing." Here Krysiaraised her dark-blue eyes to the heavens: "God is the witness above us;let people remain uninformed."

  "I see that your wit is equal to your beauty. I agree. Then God is ourwitness. Amen! Now rest your shoulder on me; for as soon as ourcontract is made, modesty is not opposed to that. Have no fear! Even ifI wished to repeat yesterday's act, I cannot, for I must take care ofthe horse."

  Krysia gratified the knight, and he said, "As often as we are alone,call me by name only."

  "Somehow it does not fit," said she, with a smile. "I never shall dareto do that."

  "But I have dared."

  "For Pan Michael is a knight, Pan Michael is daring, Pan Michael is asoldier."

  "Krysia, you are my love!"

  "Mich--" But Krysia had not courage to finish, and covered her facewith her muff.

  After a while Pan Michael returned to the house; they did not conversemuch on the road, but at the gate the little knight asked again, "Butafter yesterday's--you understand--were you very sad?"

  "Oh, I was ashamed and sad, but had a wonderful feeling," added she, ina lower voice.

  All at once they put on a look of indifference, so that no one mightsee what had passed between them. But that was a needless precaution,for no one paid heed to them. It is true that Zagloba and Pan Michael'ssister ran out to meet the two couples, but their eyes were turned onlyon Basia and Pan Adam.

  Basia was red, certainly, but it was unknown whether from cold oremotion; and Pan Adam was as if poisoned. Immediately after, too, hetook farewell of the lady of the house. In vain did she try to detainhim; in vain Pan Michael himself tried to persuade him to remain tosupper: he excused himself with service and went away. That moment PanMichael's sister, without saying a word, kissed Basia on the forehead;the young lady flew to her own chamber and did not return to supper.

  Only on the next day did Zagloba make a direct attack on her andinquire, "Well, little haiduk, a thunderbolt, as it were, struck PanAdam?"

  "Aha!" answered she, nodding affirmatively and blinking.

  "Tell me what you said to him."

  "The question was quick, for he is daring; but so was the answer, for Itoo am daring. Is it not true?"

  "You acted splendidly! Let me embrace you! What did he say? Did he lethimself be beaten off easily?"

  "He asked if with time he could not effect something. I was sorry forhim, but no, no; nothing can come of that!"

  Here Basia, distending her nostrils, began to shake her forelocksomewhat sadly, as if in thought.

  "Tell me your reasons," said Zagloba.

  "He too wanted them, but it was of no use; I did not tell him, and Iwill tell no man."

  "But perhaps," said Zagloba, looking quickly into her eyes, "you bearsome hidden love in your heart. Hei?"

  "A fig for love!" cried Basia. And springing from the place, she beganto repeat quickly, as if wishing to cover her confusion, "I do not wantPan Adam! I do not want Pan Adam! I do not want any one! Why do youplague me? Why do you plague me, all of you?" And on a sudden she burstinto tears.

  Zagloba comforted her as best he could, but during the whole day shewas gloomy and peevish. "Michael," said he at dinner, "you are going,and Ketling will come soon; he is a beauty above beauties. I know nothow these young ladies will defend themselves, but I think this, whenyou come back, you will find them both dead in love."

  "Profit for us!" said Volodyovski. "We'll give him Panna Basia atonce."

  Basia fixed on him the look of a wild-cat and said, "But why are youless concerned about Krysia?"

  The little knight was confused beyond measure at these words, and said,"You do not know Ketling's power, but you will discover it."

  "But why should not Krysia discover it? Besides, it is not I whosing,--

  'The fair head grows faint; Where will she hide herself? How will the poor thing defend herself?'"

  Now Krysia was confused in her turn, and the little wasp continued, "Inextremities I will ask Pan Adam to lend me his shield; but when you goaway, I know not with what Krysia will defend herself, if peril comeson her."

  Pan Michael had now recovered, and answered somewhat severely, "Perhapsshe will find wherewith to defend herself better than you."

  "
How so?"

  "For she is less giddy, and has more sedateness and dignity."

  Pan Zagloba and the little knight's sister thought that the keen haidukwould come to battle at once; but to their great amazement, she droppedher head toward the plate, and after a while said, in a low voice, "Ifyou are angry, I ask pardon of you and of Krysia."