Full Blast

  Jamie had to agree. Not only was it hot, the humidity hung over the town like a woolen blanket. She got out of the car, and pulled back the seat so the two women could climb in. “Fasten your seat belts,” she said, once they’d settled themselves and Jamie reclaimed the front seat.

  “You sure you know how to drive this thing?” Robyn asked.

  “Vera drives it like a pro,” Jamie told her.

  They shot off, and the women in the back seat giggled like teenagers. “Hey, maybe we can pick up some guys,” Betty said.

  Robyn Decker gasped. “Why, Betty Hamilton, I don’t believe what just came out of your mouth. You know we can’t fit any men into this back seat, what with the size of my rear end.” More giggles.

  “Holy marolly,” Vera called out. “There’s Maxine Chambers’s new store.” She whipped the Mustang into a parking slot directly in front.

  All four women leaned forward as if trying to get a closer look from where they were sitting. Finally, Jamie opened her door.

  “Where are you going?” Vera asked.

  “I want to check it out.”

  Double gasps from the back seat. “What if somebody sees you?” Betty said.

  Jamie shrugged. “Aw, come on, ladies. The ground is not going to open up and swallow us just for looking.”

  “I don’t care if the ground does swallow me up,” Vera said. “I figure it’s worth it.” She pulled the seat forward, and the two in back reluctantly climbed out.

  All four women hurried to the front of the store and gazed at the window display.

  “Oh, my,” Betty said. “I can’t believe a proper Southern woman like Maxine would fill her window with unmentionables. What are our young people going to think? It might be dangerous. It might raise the testerone level in some of the boys, and that could spell trouble.”

  “Testosterone,” Jamie corrected. “And I seriously doubt it’s something they’ve never seen before. You know how inquisitive boys can be.”

  Vera eyed the merchandise. “I don’t think I would even know how to wear some of this stuff.”

  Jamie perused the items in the window, making a mental list of what she planned to buy. “Maybe Maxine provides a list of instructions.” But she was as surprised as the others that Maxine Chambers would actually open a sexy lingerie shop. Maxine had always been on the prudish side.

  “What are those lacy things hanging over there?” Vera asked. “Between the garter belts and the see-through bras.”

  Jamie followed her gaze. “Those are thong bikini underwear.”

  Vera arched both brows. “They don’t look as though they would do much good in covering your behind. Why, if a cold wind blew up your skirt—”

  “Oh, Lord, ya’ll are not going to believe who is heading our way,” Robyn said.

  Betty turned. “Oh, heavenly days, it’s Agnes Aimsley and her grandson. The jig is up.”

  Jamie turned as Agnes, frail and white-haired, inched her way toward them. Her sneakers looked out of place with her prim dress. The man beside her, a twenty-something preppie type, had her arm tucked through his protectively. His brown hair was cropped short, and he wore oversized tortoiseshell glasses that had gone out of style long ago.

  Vera looked grim. “Agnes teaches our Sunday school class,” she told Jamie. “You may have heard she had a heart attack last year. She’s such a devout Christian that she’ll have another one if she sees what’s in Maxine’s window.”

  “We’re talking de-vout,” Betty emphasized. “If she dies, Jesus is going to have to move over and let her sit next to God. I’ll bet that’s her grandson. I hear he’s one of those religious fanatics. I hear he can be a real cuckoo clock at times.”

  “Hello, ladies,” Agnes called out pleasantly. “I see you’re taking advantage of the nice weather the good Lord has provided.”

  “Um, hello, Agnes,” Vera said.

  Jamie tried to suppress a smile as Vera, Betty, and Robyn backed against the store window, no doubt attempting to block it from Agnes’s view.

  “Have ya’ll met my grandson, Brent Walker? He’s visiting for the summer while on break from Emory University where he is studying to be one of God’s messengers.”

  They all shook hands. “Very nice to meet you, ladies,” Brent said politely. He glanced up at the sign hanging over the window. Agnes looked up as well.

  “ ‘Sinful Delights,’ ” she read aloud, and suddenly smiled. “I didn’t know we had a new chocolate shop in town. I hope they sell Godiva, that’s my favorite. Scoot over, I want to see.”

  She and Vera did a little jig as Vera tried to stop her from looking past her.

  “Believe me, Agnes, you’re better off not knowing,” Betty said.

  Jamie cleared her throat and tried to remain straight-faced. The grandson looked confused.

  “Perhaps we should move on,” Brent said, as if taking his cue from the looks on the women’s faces.

  Agnes wasn’t deterred. “Would you ladies please step aside so I can see what’s in the window?”

  It was like the parting of the Red Sea, Jamie decided, watching Vera, Betty, and Robyn clear the way so Agnes could step closer. “Oh, my,” she said. Her eyes glazed over in shock.

  Brent’s face turned a deep red. “What is the meaning of this?” he demanded. “Who would open such a place?”

  Vera started to answer, but he cut her off and pulled a small tablet from his back pocket.

  “I demand to know the name of the owner.”

  “Maxine Chambers,” Betty supplied. “Actually, we’re shocked, as well.”

  He scribbled the name on his pad. “This place looks like something straight out of Sodom and Gomorrah. I’m going to have a talk with this Chambers woman. I feel it’s my Christian duty.”

  “Would somebody please explain what those are,” Agnes said, pointing to a pair of underwear.

  “They’re edible undies,” Jamie said, only to have Brent glare at her. Jamie shrugged. “Well, she asked.”

  “Edible undies?” Agnes said. “I don’t understand.” Suddenly, as if a lightbulb had gone off in her head, she gasped and covered her breast with both hands as if to keep her heart from leaping out. “Oh, my.”

  “Let’s go, Gram,” Brent said, taking her by the arm. And not a moment too soon. Agnes swayed and fell into a dead faint.

  Brent caught her in his arms. “Somebody call 911!”

  “WELL, THANK GOD IT WASN’T A HEART ATTACK,” Vera said when she dropped Jamie off at her house two hours later, after sitting in the ER waiting on word of Agnes’s condition.

  “It was probably a good idea that her doctor decided to keep her overnight for observation anyway,” Jamie said. “I’ll tell you, that grandson of hers is a nut.”

  “Yeah, he’s a real fruitcake,” Vera said, putting the gear into neutral. “Oh, by the way, you’re not feeling a little weird, are you?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You know, from eating those brownies?”

  “You mean horny?”

  Vera rolled her eyes. “Yeah, that.”

  Jamie decided she wouldn’t tell Vera she got horny every time she thought of tall, dark, and dropdead gorgeous Max Holt. “Yeah, I’m feeling a little frisky,” Jamie confessed, although she suspected it was just her imagination. “I’m thinking maybe a cold shower is in order.”

  Vera sighed. “I’m thinking the same thing. Must be my wild oats acting up.”

  JAMIE ARRIVED AT WORK THE NEXT MORNING, JUST as Destiny Moultrie climbed from a cream-colored Mercedes. The woman hurried over.

  “I know I promised to give you a day or two to think about the column,” she began, “but I’m anxious to get started.”

  Moultrie was dressed in silk khaki-colored slacks and a matching jacket that hung open to expose a tight purple bustier that barely contained her breasts. “Cleavage” seemed to be Destiny’s middle name.

  “I’m really busy,” Jamie said.

  “I was hoping we could talk it ov
er this morning. And I’d like to discuss another matter with you. It’s pretty important.”

  Jamie did a mental sigh. That meant all the doughnuts would be eaten by the time she got to the small kitchen in back, but she figured she at least owed Destiny the truth. She had no intention of hiring a psychic for her column, even if there was to be a column, which she hadn’t decided on one way or the other.

  “I can only afford a few minutes,” she said.

  “I knew you’d say that.” Destiny followed her to the front double-glass doors.

  Vera looked up the minute they stepped inside. Her gaze immediately fell on Destiny. “How did you know I was going to have car trouble?”

  Destiny shrugged. “I just had a feeling. I didn’t want you to find yourself stranded.”

  “You didn’t tamper beneath my hood, did you?”

  “Vera!” Jamie said. “That was not a nice thing to say.”

  “It happens all the time,” Destiny said. “People don’t want to believe in things they can’t see.”

  Vera gave a grunt. “So what’s it going to cost me to get my car repaired?”

  Destiny shrugged. “I have no idea.”

  Vera looked at Jamie. “See, I told you there was nothing to this psychic stuff.”

  “What I meant to say,” Destiny began slowly, “is I have no idea how much a new engine costs.”

  “A new engine!” Vera cried.

  “Man, that’s going to cost you,” Jamie said, then caught herself. What was she thinking?

  “New engine, my foot,” Vera said. “There’s not a darn thing wrong with my engine.”

  “Maybe we should step into my office,” Jamie said, motioning Destiny inside.

  The woman followed. Jamie paused at the door and glanced back at Vera. “Has Mike come in yet?” Mike Henderson was Jamie’s fresh-out-of-college editor. She was trying to raise him to be a real newspaperman since he was organizationally challenged and spent much of his time chasing women.

  “He’s covering the city council meeting, and then he has an appointment to interview the new high school football coach.”

  Jamie nodded and closed the door. She turned and almost bumped into Destiny.

  “I have something to tell you,” the woman said.

  Jamie took the chair behind her desk and motioned for Destiny to sit. “What is it?”

  “Last night I had a vision. You were in it. There was a man with you.”

  Jamie perked up and thought of Max. “Oh, yeah? Were we naked?” She slapped her hand against her forehead. Now why had she gone and said something like that? The last thing she needed to do was encourage the woman.

  “It wasn’t that kind of vision,” Destiny said. “This man was in uniform, and he was asking you a lot of questions.”

  Jamie remained quiet.

  Destiny didn’t seem deterred by her silence. “The situation was, um, dire, because I had this heavy feeling in my chest afterward.”

  Jamie figured any woman with Destiny’s breasts would have a heavy feeling in her chest. She sighed. “Okay, Destiny, I’ll play along. Who was asking these questions and what were they?”

  “I don’t know.” At Jamie’s look, Destiny went on. “Hey, I’m doing my best here, okay? I can’t give you every little detail.” All at once she glanced to the chair beside her. “Shut up, okay? I don’t need your help.”

  Jamie’s eyes widened as she followed Destiny’s gaze to the empty chair. “Uh, Destiny, who are you talking to?” she asked.

  The woman didn’t hesitate. “His name is Ronnie. He’s from the spirit world. He doesn’t have enough sense to know he’s dead. Follows me everywhere.”

  Jamie gripped the arms on her chair as chills raced up her spine. Time to bolt, she told herself.

  “He’s just an old redneck, don’t worry, he’s harmless.” She glanced back at the empty chair. “Yes, you heard me right, Ronnie, you are a redneck. Anybody who gets sloppy drunk and falls out of the back of a pickup truck doing sixty miles per hour is a bona fide redneck in my book.” She looked at Jamie. “That’s how he died. He’s kinda between worlds.”

  “Oh, well, that certainly explains it.” Jamie glanced at the door. It would take her less than three seconds to reach it if she ran like hell.

  “Hey, I know it sounds crazy,” Destiny said, “but that’s the way it is. I have dead people show up all the time. They don’t usually stay long. So, when do you want me to start?”

  Jamie blinked. “Huh?”

  “The job? I got a lot of my stuff unpacked last night so I’m ready to roll.”

  Jamie decided the woman had enough problems so she tried to let her down easy. “I’m thinking maybe I should hold off on the column,” she said. What Jamie was actually thinking was that Destiny needed to be hauled off in a straitjacket.

  “I suggest you announce the new column in your newspaper as soon as possible.”

  “Well, like I said—”

  Destiny sighed in exasperation. “Dammit, Ronnie, would you please stop yakking and let me finish this conversation?” She shifted in her chair and regarded Jamie. “Look, I don’t have all day. Let’s do this. Run the announcement. If you don’t get a substantial amount of responses, I promise I won’t bother you again.”

  Once again, Jamie glanced at the chair beside Destiny. “Does he follow you everywhere?” she asked, thinking it would be best to have all the facts before she reported the woman to the authorities.

  “Who, Ronnie?” Destiny sighed. “Hell, I can’t even take a shower without the pervert getting in there with me. But don’t worry; as soon as his pea brain realizes he needs to move on, he’ll be out of my life.” She rolled her eyes. “Dead people,” she said on a sigh. “They can be such a pain in the ass.” All at once, she sneezed. “Uh-oh, gotta run before I go into a sneezing frenzy.” She stood and made for the door. “I’ll call you later.”

  Jamie stopped her. “Um, Destiny?”

  She turned. “Yeah?”

  Jamie almost felt sorry for her. “How about I call you when I’ve made my decision? In the meantime, don’t tell Vera about your friend, okay?”

  “VERA, I NEED TO RUN AN ERRAND,” JAMIE SAID, shortly after Destiny left. “I won’t be long.”

  “No problem, I’ll hold down the fort.”

  Jamie picked up her pocketbook and left the building, hurrying down the street toward Maxine Chambers’s shop. She couldn’t wait to see what was inside. She opened the door and stepped in, and was greeted by the smell of lavender.

  Maxine was standing behind the counter. She had changed her mousy brown hair to a flattering red and wore makeup, something she had never bothered with when she’d worked at the library.

  “Well, Jamie Swift, it’s wonderful to see you again, only this time we don’t have to whisper like we did at the library.”

  “I just came by to offer my congratulations on your new store,” Jamie said.

  Maxine smiled. “Well, you’re the first. Everyone else is shocked that I would do such a thing, and some preacher wannabe is calling constantly, accusing me of corrupting the town. And get this; he wants to meet with me so he can pray for my soul. I told him to take a hike.”

  Jamie knew Brent Walker had been the one to call. “I’m sure it’s going to take time for some folks to adjust. I’d just ignore him.” She glanced around. “Now then, why don’t you show me around? I’ve been dying to come in.”

  “What did you have in mind?”

  “I’m not sure. Something a little sexy.” She thought of the edible underwear. “Without going overboard,” she added.

  “Come on and let me show you my new European lace collection. They’re elegant but simple. Sexy and classy,” she added.

  Jamie followed her to an aisle where Maxine held up the most beautiful bras and panties she’d ever seen. “Oh, my,” she said.

  “Aren’t they lovely?” Maxine said proudly. “And look at this baby doll sleepwear in satin. Think how nice that would feel against your
skin.”

  Jamie ran her hand against the material. “I’ve never felt anything so nice.”

  “I agree,” Maxine said. “This is top-of-the-line. Oh, and I’ve got these beautiful teddies and body suits. Aren’t they wonderful? And you’ve got just the figure for them.”

  “Why, thank you, Maxine.” Jamie paused and studied the woman. “I don’t mean to be nosy, Maxine, but what made you decide to open a lingerie store?”

  The woman smiled. “I guess I’m the last person in the world people would expect to find running a store like this, but it’s always been a secret fantasy of mine. So one morning I woke up and reminded myself I wasn’t getting any younger, and that’s when I started getting serious about it. Unfortunately, I haven’t had a lot of customers since I opened.”

  “Then you’ll have to let me write an article about your store,” Jamie said, “along with a nice advertisement. It’ll be my celebration gift to you.”

  “Why, thank you, Jamie. That’s very kind of you. You know, I’ve always liked you. You were so careful with your library books. You never dog-eared the pages like some folks, and you always brought them back on time.” She sniffed. “Not all people respect books like you do. Why, I could tell you stories—”

  “Show me what else you’ve got,” Jamie said, wanting to change the subject. Maxine probably did have a lot of stories, but she didn’t have time to listen to them.

  Maxine gave her a complete tour of the store. In the end, Jamie selected a number of items from the European collection.

  “Good choice,” Maxine said, “and since you’re one of my first customers, I’m going to give you a ten percent discount.” She rang up the merchandise, then wrapped the bras, panties, sleepwear, and body suits in tissue paper and put them in a beautiful lavender-colored bag.

  Jamie handed her a check. “Why don’t we meet for lunch early next week so we can talk about your store?” she said. “In the meantime, I’ll send my editor over to get a picture of you for the ad.”

  Maxine looked pleased. “Well, now, I think that would be quite nice. You just call me when it’s convenient.”

  “I’ll check my calendar and get back to you.” Jamie left the store a few minutes later with her purchases and walked by the bakery, thinking how good a brownie would taste right about now. She didn’t really believe they contained an aphrodisiac, but on the off chance they did, she’d better steer clear of them. Her libido was giving her enough trouble these days.