Pollyanna Grows Up
CHAPTER XXIX
JIMMY AND JOHN
It was a very determined, square-jawed young man that alighted at theBeldingsville station late that Saturday night. And it was an evenmore determined, square-jawed young man that, before ten o'clock thenext morning, stalked through the Sunday-quiet village streets andclimbed the hill to the Harrington homestead. Catching sight of aloved and familiar flaxen coil of hair on a well-poised little headjust disappearing into the summerhouse, the young man ignored theconventional front steps and doorbell, crossed the lawn, and strodethrough the garden paths until he came face to face with the owner ofthe flaxen coil of hair.
"Jimmy!" gasped Pollyanna, falling back with startled eyes. "Why,where did you--come from?"
"Boston. Last night. I had to see you, Pollyanna."
"To--see--m-me?" Pollyanna was plainly fencing for time to regain hercomposure. Jimmy looked so big and strong and DEAR there in the doorof the summerhouse that she feared her eyes had been surprised into atelltale admiration, if not more.
"Yes, Pollyanna; I wanted--that is, I thought--I mean, I feared--Oh,hang it all, Pollyanna, I can't beat about the bush like this. I'llhave to come straight to the point. It's just this. I stood asidebefore, but I won't now. It isn't a case any longer of fairness. Heisn't crippled like Jamie. He's got feet and hands and a head likemine, and if he wins he'll have to win in a fair fight. I'VE got somerights!"
Pollyanna stared frankly.
"Jimmy Bean Pendleton, whatever in the world are you talking about?"she demanded.
The young man laughed shamefacedly.
"No wonder you don't know. It wasn't very lucid, was it? But I don'tthink I've been really lucid myself since yesterday--when I found outfrom Jamie himself."
"Found out--from Jamie!"
"Yes. It was the prize that started it. You see, he'd just got one,and--"
"Oh, I know about that," interrupted Pollyanna, eagerly. "And wasn'tit splendid? Just think--the first one--three thousand dollars! Iwrote him a letter last night. Why, when I saw his name, and realizedit was Jamie--OUR JAMIE--I was so excited I forgot all about lookingfor MY name, and even when I couldn't find mine at all, and knew thatI hadn't got any--I mean, I was so excited and pleased for Jamie thatI--I forgot--er--everything else," corrected Pollyanna, throwing adismayed glance into Jimmy's face, and feverishly trying to cover upthe partial admission she had made.
Jimmy, however, was too intent on his own problem to notice hers.
"Yes, yes, 'twas fine, of course. I'm glad he got it. But Pollyanna,it was what he said AFTERWARD that I mean. You see, until then I'dthought that--that he cared--that you cared--for each other, I mean;and--"
"You thought that Jamie and I cared for each other!" exclaimedPollyanna, into whose face now was stealing a soft, shy color. "Why,Jimmy, it's Sadie Dean. 'Twas always Sadie Dean. He used to talk ofher to me by the hour. I think she likes him, too."
"Good! I hope she does; but, you see, I didn't know. I thought 'twasJamie--and you. And I thought that because he was--was a cripple, youknow, that it wouldn't be fair if I--if I stayed around and tried towin you myself."
Pollyanna stooped suddenly, and picked up a leaf at her feet. When sherose, her face was turned quite away.
"A fellow can't--can't feel square, you know, running a race with achap that--that's handicapped from the start. So I--I just stayed awayand gave him his chance; though it 'most broke my heart to do it,little girl. It just did! Then yesterday morning I found out. But Ifound out something else, too. Jamie says there is--is somebody elsein the case. But I can't stand aside for him, Pollyanna. I can't--evenin spite of all he's done for me. John Pendleton is a man, and he'sgot two whole feet for the race. He's got to take his chances. If youcare for him--if you really care for him--"
But Pollyanna had turned, wild-eyed.
"JOHN PENDLETON! Jimmy, what do you mean? What are you saying--aboutJohn Pendleton?"
A great joy transfigured Jimmy's face. He held out both his hands.
"Then you don't--you don't! I can see it in your eyes that youdon't--care!"
Pollyanna shrank back. She was white and trembling.
"Jimmy, what do you mean? What do you mean?" she begged piteously.
"I mean--you don't care for Uncle John, that way. Don't youunderstand? Jamie thinks you do care, and that anyway he cares foryou. And then I began to see it--that maybe he did. He's alwaystalking about you; and, of course, there was your mother--"
Pollyanna gave a low moan and covered her face with her hands. Jimmycame close and laid a caressing arm about her shoulders; but againPollyanna shrank from him.
"Pollyanna, little girl, don't! You'll break my heart," he begged."Don't you care for me--ANY? Is it that, and you don't want to tellme?"
She dropped her hands and faced him. Her eyes had the hunted look ofsome wild thing at bay.
"Jimmy, do YOU think--he cares for me--that way?" she entreated, justabove a whisper.
Jimmy gave his head an impatient shake.
"Never mind that, Pollyanna,--now. I don't know, of course. How shouldI? But, dearest, that isn't the question. It's you. If YOU don't carefor him, and if you'll only give me a chance--half a chance to let memake you care for me--" He caught her hand, and tried to draw her tohim.
"No, no, Jimmy, I mustn't! I can't!" With both her little palms shepushed him from her.
"Pollyanna, you don't mean you DO care for him?" Jimmy's facewhitened.
"No; no, indeed--not that way," faltered Pollyanna. "But--don't yousee?--if he cares for me, I'll have to--to learn to, someway."
"POLLYANNA!"
"Don't! Don't look at me like that, Jimmy!"
"You mean you'd MARRY him, Pollyanna?"
"Oh, no!--I mean--why--er--y-yes, I suppose so," she admitted faintly.
"Pollyanna, you wouldn't! You couldn't! Pollyanna, you--you'rebreaking my heart."
Pollyanna gave a low sob. Her face was in her hands again. For amoment she sobbed on, chokingly; then, with a tragic gesture, shelifted her head and looked straight into Jimmy's anguished,reproachful eyes.
"I know it, I know it," she chattered frenziedly. "I'm breaking mine,too. But I'll have to do it. I'd break your heart, I'd break mine--butI'd never break his!"
Jimmy raised his head. His eyes flashed a sudden fire. His wholeappearance underwent a swift and marvelous change. With a tender,triumphant cry he swept Pollyanna into his arms and held her close.
"Now I KNOW you care for me!" he breathed low in her ear. "You said itwas breaking YOUR heart, too. Do you think I'll give you up now to anyman on earth? Ah, dear, you little understand a love like mine if youthink I'd give you up now. Pollyanna, say you love me--say it withyour own dear lips!"
For one long minute Pollyanna lay unresisting in the fiercely tenderembrace that encircled her; then with a sigh that was half content,half renunciation, she began to draw herself away.
"Yes, Jimmy, I do love you." Jimmy's arms tightened, and would havedrawn her back to him; but something in the girl's face forbade. "Ilove you dearly. But I couldn't ever be happy with you and feelthat--Jimmy, don't you see, dear? I'll have to know--that I'm free,first."
"Nonsense, Pollyanna! Of course you're free!" Jimmy's eyes weremutinous again.
Pollyanna shook her head.
"Not with this hanging over me, Jimmy. Don't you see? It was mother,long ago, that broke his heart--MY MOTHER. And all these years he'slived a lonely, unloved life in consequence. If now he should come tome and ask me to make that up to him, I'd HAVE to do it, Jimmy. I'dHAVE to. I couldn't REFUSE! Don't you see?"
But Jimmy did not see; he could not see. He would not see, thoughPollyanna pleaded and argued long and tearfully. But Pollyanna, too,was obdurate, though so sweetly and heartbrokenly obdurate that Jimmy,in spite of his pain and anger, felt almost like turning comforter.
"Jimmy, dear," said Pollyanna, at last, "we'll have to wait. That'sall I can say now. I hope he doesn't care; and I--I don't believe hedoes care. But I've got to KNO
W. I've got to be sure. We'll just haveto wait, a little, till we find out, Jimmy--till we find out!"
And to this plan Jimmy had to submit, though it was with a mostrebellious heart.
"All right, little girl, it'll have to be as you say, of course," hedespaired. "But, surely, never before was a man kept waiting for hisanswer till the girl he loved, AND WHO LOVED HIM, found out if theother man wanted her!"
"I know; but, you see, dear, never before had the other man WANTED hermother," sighed Pollyanna, her face puckered into an anxious frown.
"Very well, I'll go back to Boston, of course," acceded Jimmyreluctantly. "But you needn't think I've given up--because I haven't.Nor I sha'n't give up, just so long as I know you really care for me,my little sweetheart," he finished, with a look that sent herpalpitatingly into retreat, just out of reach of his arms.