A Matter of Trust

  ****

  Jake did a slow burn. He’d been sitting in his truck in Trish’s parents’ driveway for exactly two hours and twelve minutes, and she still wasn’t home. He’d made up his mind that he’d wait her out, no matter what time she got there. She had to come back sometime. When Trish pulled up beside him, she looked so upset and so … scared, he forgot his anger toward her and opened the door to his truck. He closed the door and stuffed his hands in his pockets to stop himself from reaching for her and waited for her approach.

  “Hi, Jake. How long have you been waiting?”

  “Two hours and …” he checked his watch “… fourteen minutes. Can I come in?”

  She looked up at him with tears in her eyes.

  “Damn it, Trish. Don’t cry, honey.” He reached for her and wrapped his arms around her.

  Jake rested his chin on the top of Trish’s head. She smelled like spring. He pulled her closer for a second then pulled back. “Have you eaten?”

  She nodded and looked up at him, and he wiped the tears from her face. “I met Callie and Eva for dinner. I’m sorry you waited so long.”

  “You’re worth the wait, sweetheart.”

  “I’m sorry I was so bitchy this morning. I wouldn’t have blamed you if you’d stayed away. I was even kind of hoping you would.”

  “So, you’re not a morning person.”

  “I think we both know it’s a little more complicated than that.”

  “I’m good at complicated. Give me a shot, Trish. Can we go inside?”

  “Sure. Are you hungry?”

  “I could eat.” They went inside and headed straight to the kitchen. Trish kicked off her shoes and went to the fridge and pulled out all the fixings for a sandwich. When she finished, she pulled out a paper plate with the face of a zebra on it, added chips and a pickle spear, and set it in front of him. She started to pull away and take the seat next to him, but he grabbed her hand and kissed her palm. “Thanks. So, tell me about your day. I’m hoping it was as miserable as mine was.”

  She couldn’t help but smile. “It was. Despite the fact that we had a successful day in terms of new business, I was absolutely miserable.”

  “Good to know. If it’s any consolation, word spread like wild fire to all my employees to avoid me at all cost at the risk of personal peril. They likened me to a grizzly bear, a badger, and a psychopath.”

  “My secretary wanted to know if I was coming down with something.”

  “So. You want to tell me what happened this morning?”

  “I’m not sure I can. I’m still trying to figure things out. Last night was … it was … “

  “Outstanding? Exceptional? Unforgettable?”

  “It was all those things, Jake. You were amazing, and I’ll never forget it. But I hadn’t planned on … I mean I didn’t think I would ever … it came as a surprise. Jeez, I’m making a mess of this.”

  “So, you weren’t attracted to me?” Jake’s expression challenged her.

  “Yes, of course I was.”

  “I caught you at a weak moment, then?” The look on his face was entirely patient and reasonable as he continued to quiz her.

  “Yes, I mean, no. That is, I got carried away in the moment.”

  “So, you regret it now?”

  “No. Maybe. Not exactly. Oh hell, I don’t know. This is so hard.” Trish rested her head in her hands, elbows propped up on the kitchen table.

  “It doesn’t have to be, Trish. You’re making it harder than it has to be. I had a great time last night, did you?”

  Big blue eyes looked up at him unblinkingly, and she nodded.

  “So, we have good chemistry. I think you’re pretty great, not just in the sack, but all the time.” She blushed, but kept eye contact. “Do you think I’m great, Trish?”

  She blinked and nodded again with slightly more enthusiasm.

  “So, we have good chemistry, and we like and respect each other. Then, what’s scaring you, sweetheart? Talk to me. Please.”

  Trish recounted everything she’d told Eva and Callie about her marriage earlier that evening, and Jake listened without interrupting.

  “So, you can see why I’m so hesitant to enter into another serious relationship. It’s better if I just stay on my own. I’m not ever going to allow myself or my kids to be put in that kind of predicament again.”

  Jake watched Trish silently as he weighed everything she had said. He at least understood now why she didn’t trust anyone or let anyone take care of things for her. She blamed herself for the choices and mistakes her husband made, simply because she didn’t see trouble coming, and she was determined to never be caught by surprise again. She equated love and trust with gullibility and disaster. She thought the only way to make sure that she and her children had the security they needed was to stay alone, so she’d never be fooled or caught off guard again. She’d decided not to rely or depend on anyone but herself.

  “I understand better now, but I need you to remember that I’m not Pete. No, just hear me out.” She’d been on the verge of arguing with him, but he was determined to have his say. “You don’t want to ever find yourself in the position you found yourself in Dallas. I get that. Nobody would. The person you should’ve been able to count on no matter what not only let you down, he left you to pay the price for his bad choices and clean up his mess, which you’re still doing. He deserted you and left you destitute and vulnerable. I don’t blame you. But, Trish, all that happened before you and I got involved. It has everything to do with you, but it has nothing to do with me, other than the outrage I feel on your behalf.”

  “I think we have something together worth investigating, worth taking a chance on. I know I’m asking a lot of you when I ask you to trust me, but I’m asking you to do it, anyway. I’m not Pete. I don’t ever want to be compared to Pete, and I sure as hell don’t want to be confused with him. As far as I’m concerned, he was a sorry SOB, and he didn’t deserve you or those two kids. I don’t expect you to believe unequivocally that I’ll never let you down or you can depend or rely on me. All I’m asking is for a chance to prove to you I’m worthy of that kind of faith. In time, you’ll see for yourself I’m not about to let you down. What’s the harm in giving us some time together, Trish? If it doesn’t work out, fine, but I can’t just walk away and wonder how it might have been between us. I think we have a shot at something real, something worth fighting for. Fight with me for this, Trish. Don’t just walk away.”

  Trish clasped her hands together tightly. He could see the wheels turning in her head as she considered everything he had said.

  Jake didn’t take his eyes off of Trish’s as he waited for her response. He could see her fear to take this leap of faith, but she couldn’t possibly be any more scared than he was she wouldn’t take the chance. He stood up and held his hand out to her, hoping and praying she’d take it. She looked at his hand, then into his eyes and hesitantly stood up. And placed her hand in his.

  Jake pulled her into a hard embrace and kissed her, breathing a sigh of relief that he’d won this battle. He figured he still had a hell of a war to wage, but this was a start, and he was determined to breach all her defenses and be victorious in the end. Trish was worth fighting for, and he would be a warrior.

  “I’m scared to death, Jake.”

  “I know you are, but it’s going to be okay, I promise. You’ll see. It’ll be okay.” He lifted her chin up and fused his lips to hers in a kiss full of promise and hope. “It’s late, and we’ve both had a rough day, and we both work tomorrow. I’m going to leave, so you can get some rest. How about I bring you lunch tomorrow?”

  “That sounds great. How about I cook you dinner tomorrow?”

  “That sounds greater.” Jake cupped her cheek in his big, strong hand, then bent to kiss her again. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

  “Do you want to stay?”

  “
Ask me tomorrow, and I will.”

  “Déjà vu. Only this time I’m not sloshed.” They walked to the door together, arm in arm.

  “Don’t get used to me turning you down. You look tired, Trish. Get some sleep. I want you … energetic tomorrow, okay?” She nodded, and he kissed her goodnight and left.

  As she locked up behind him, she couldn’t help thinking that, despite being scared spitless, he was worth fighting for. She felt drained. She had so much work to do, but she just couldn’t do it tonight. She’d set her alarm and get up early to get caught up. Trish set the alarm for five and rolled over and fell asleep with her clothes on.