A Pinch of Salt

  “Ohhhh, pajamas sound nice,” Tasha cooed.

  “Mmmhmmm, and these shoes hurt,” Dru added, lifting her leg and kicking her foot until her shoe flew off, almost hitting me in the head.

  Luckily, I caught it.

  “Come on,” Millie, the buzzed one, said, trying to help by pulling on her sister’s arms. “Let’s go get you changed.”

  “Hey,” Dru said, pulling her arm out of Millie’s grasp. “Not so rough, you’ll leave a bruise.” She turned toward me with a sloppy grin. “Maybe Jackson can carry me up; it is my birthday, after all.”

  “Oh brother,” Tasha moaned with an exaggerated eye roll. “It’s gotta be past midnight by now. This girl will milk her birthday until next year if you let her.”

  “No one is carrying anybody,” Millie denied as she put Tasha’s arm around her shoulder and they began taking it one step at a time. “Move your booty, Dru.”

  “She’s so mean to me,” Dru pouted, but she stood on wobbly legs and grasped the handrail.

  I trailed behind them, ready to catch anyone who stumbled, until we reached the top.

  We stopped in Tasha’s apartment first, Millie taking her sister into the bedroom to get changed, while I looked for some type of aspirin and poured a glass of water. Mille came out, grabbed both from me, said, “Thanks,” then disappeared back into the bedroom.

  Once she came back out, we stepped out of the apartment, locked the door, and looked to the left to see Dru sitting on the floor in front of her door, her head tilted back against the wood and her eyes closed.

  When she let out a soft snore, Millie giggled, then looked at me.

  “You hold her up, I’ll open the door.”

  Millie entered the apartment, presumably to do exactly what we’d done at Tasha’s as I strained to hold Dru’s dead weight up and cross the threshold. Once we were inside, I heard a cough and a sniffle, then looked down to see Dru staring up at me.

  “You okay?” I asked, hoping she wasn’t about to puke on me.

  “That guy who found your wife . . .”

  “Mick,” I supplied.

  “Yeah, him . . . Do you think he could find our dad?” Dru asked, then her head fell forward and I had to brace myself before we both toppled.

  Millie came out of the bedroom, some pajamas thrown over her arm, and said, “I’ve got her from here, why don’t you head to my place and I’ll meet you over there.”

  I accepted her keys with a nod, then left the sisters in peace, my mind running a mile a minute.

  Millie had never mentioned her father. I was just now realizing none of them ever had. They’d spoken about their mom, what she was like, and how hard it was now that she was gone, but nothing about the man who was their father.

  I was surprised that I’d never really thought about it, but now that Dru mentioned it, I was curious.

  I was about to open Millie’s door when I became aware of the discomfort I was feeling. Damn, these shorts were tight. And, I realized that I’d left my backpack with spare clothes in my truck. I jogged back down the steps as fast as the shorts would allow, grabbed what I needed, and headed back up to find Millie coming out of Dru’s apartment.

  “Is she all right?” I asked.

  “Passed out,” Millie replied with a smile. “But, I was able to get some Motrin and Gatorade in her first.”

  “That’s good.”

  I used the key to open the door, then stepped aside to let her enter ahead of me.

  When I would have headed straight to the bathroom to change, Millie turned and placed a hand on my chest.

  “Uh-uh.” She shook her head and guided me to stand in front of her couch, then went to the record player and messed with it until Elvis began crooning.

  I watched as she took the headdress off and shook out her hair, then sat in front of me with a big smile.

  “Entertain me, Elvis,” Millie dared with a sexy smile, and my shorts got a whole lot tighter.

  I flung my backpack onto the couch next to her, then began moving my hips as my fingers came up to first untuck my shirt at the waist, then unbutton it slowly. With my shirt hanging open, I did another pelvis thrust, which made Millie cat call and me turn red, then eased the shirt off my shoulders.

  Millie’s eyes widened, then narrowed and her face became flushed as she looked at my shorts. I looked down and saw that nothing was left to the imagination, as my dick strained against the thin fabric.

  “C’mhere,” she mumbled, her tongue darting out to wet her lips as she watched me step to her.

  When I was close enough, Millie’s hands reached out, grabbed me by the waistband, and tugged me closer, causing my blood to heat then boil when she started working on my zipper. And when she looked up at me from under her eyelashes, I was a goner.

  Millie

  I CAME AWAKE SLOWLY, MY body thrumming as I was pulled from the darkness into the morning with a moan.

  It took me a moment to register what was going on. First, I felt the yearning, then the pleasure, and finally, the sweet, wet heat of Jackson’s tongue on me. I arched my back languidly with a moan as all of my senses awoke at once.

  God, he’s good at that, I thought briefly before I no longer had the ability to think.

  As I came down, Jackson kissed one thigh, then the other, then dropped kisses on his way up my body. By the time he was fully on top of me, my arms were wrapped around him and I was smiling serenely up at him.

  “Good morning,” I whispered. And it was . . . what a great way to start the day.

  “I wanted to do that last night, but we got a bit carried away,” he began, causing me to moan at the memory of last night.

  Me taking him in my mouth until he went wild, lost control, and bent me over the couch.

  It had been amazing, frantic, and we’d been just buzzed enough to totally pass out afterward. Somehow, we’d at least made it to the bed before losing it, but we hadn’t found the time to put on pajamas, so we were both still fantastically naked.

  “Mmmm, I like the feel of you against me,” I murmured, my hands roaming everywhere they could.

  “And I love the feel of you beneath me,” Jackson whispered before dropping his head to capture my lips with his.

  I brought my knees up, then tilted my hips up.

  “Are you sure?” he asked.

  We’d already had the talk about being tested, birth control, and all of that. We were both clean and I was on the pill, so I answered, “Yes.”

  We both moaned as he slid inside of me, none of the urgency from last night present this morning. No, instead, it was like we were engaged in a sleek, sexy, Viennese Waltz, our bodies dancing in tune with each other.

  “Nothing feels as good as this,” Jackson said softly in my ear, before his lips moved down my neck, loving me there.

  I shoved one hand in his hair and fisted it, matching his thrusts as I felt desire building within me again.

  “You’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever met,” he panted, his breath becoming labored as he moved faster.

  “So are you,” I replied, not really knowing what I was saying as I felt the pressure begin to build.

  Bracing my other hand on Jackson’s shoulder, I held on and pushed up with my thighs so that my clit was in just the right spot as he moved over me. Then my whole body stilled as the orgasm crashed through me, and I was barely aware of Jackson shouting my name as he found his own release.

  I grunted when he collapsed on top of me, so he apologized and rolled over to his side, taking me with him so that I was half splayed across his chest as we both struggled for breath.

  After a few minutes, Jackson asked, “So, I’m the most amazing woman you’ve ever met?”

  I was confused at first, then realized what I’d said in the heat of passion and started laughing so hard, I snorted.

  “Sorry, I was a little preoccupied.”

  Jackson turned his head toward me, his dimples showing.

  “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
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  “You should,” I agreed, running my fingers across his ribs, causing him to flinch. “Sorry,” I said, then tilted my head back and rested it against his bicep. “So, yesterday . . .”

  Jackson closed his eyes briefly, then opened them and said, “I barely recognized her. Not just her personality, or the way she’s been acting, but physically. She’s lost a lot of weight, had work done . . . I guess when she said she needed to find herself, she actually meant to become a different person. I barely caught a glimpse of the Julie I knew.”

  “I’m sorry,” I said, lamely, but what else could I say?

  “Listening to her, seeing her, I got it . . . finally. A little. I mean, I don’t understand it, and can’t relate, but I finally understood what she meant.”

  “Wow, really?”

  “Yeah, I mean, my heart was screaming that she’s selfish, a horrible person, and a complete stranger.” Jackson looked at me warily, as if worried I’d judge him for thinking bad things about his wife. When I nodded encouragingly, he continued, “But, in my head, I could see where she was coming from, and why she felt she needed to do what she did. That’s not to say I condone it, or even forgive it, just that I get it.”

  “You’re a good man,” I assured him, thinking there was no way in hell I understood where she was coming from. Of course, I’d never even met her, let alone spoke with her, so how could I?

  “You think?” he asked.

  “Absolutely.”

  “Because even with all of that being said, I want to rip her heart out when I think about what she’s doing to Kayla, what they’re both missing out on.” Jackson sighed and ran a hand over his face. “I have to talk to Kayla, tell her that I saw Julie.”

  “I’m so sorry, I can’t imagine how hard that will be.”

  “It sucks. I’ve had to break her heart on Julie’s behalf before, and I’m scared to see how she’ll take it this time. But this is the last time I’m going to let her hurt our baby.”

  My heart hurt for both Jackson and Kayla as I thought about what it felt like to be abandoned by one of the people who was supposed to love you most. I knew what it was like, and I’d never been able to forget, or forgive. I could only hope that things would be different for Kayla.

  Jackson

  AFTER A ROCKY AFTERNOON YESTERDAY, then an absolutely wonderful night, I picked up Kayla and decided to keep things light on the drive back.

  I didn’t want to have this discussion with her in the truck, but thought it would be best to be home, surrounded by our things, with easy access to her bed if she needed to lay down and cry it out.

  Still, it was hard to be upbeat on the drive home, especially when the first thing Kayla asked when she got in the truck was, “Have fun with Millie?”

  I decided to ignore her snide tone and answered, “Yes, I did.”

  Kayla’d crossed her arms and pouted the whole way home.

  Once we got her things inside, unpacked, and put her dirty clothes in the laundry, I turned to my daughter and said, “We need to talk.”

  “I don’t want to talk about Millie. You can’t make me like her,” she said snidely, and I had to remind myself that she was a nine-year-old girl who missed her mother and was about to be heartbroken once again.

  It was hard, but I managed to keep that at the forefront of my mind and to put the issues with Millie on the backburner for now.

  “It’s not about Millie . . . for now,” I warned, but kept my tone gentle, because I knew what was about to come. “Sit.”

  Kayla frowned and looked at me warily, but got up on her bed and sat against the pillows.

  Once she was settled, I started, “I saw your mom yesterday.”

  When her face lit up, my heart shattered.

  “Is she coming home?” Kayla asked hopefully.

  “No, baby, she’s not,” I replied heavily.

  Kayla’s face dropped, then her eyes narrowed and she asked, “It’s because you’re seeing that Millie, isn’t it? My mom would come home if you weren’t going off on dates with someone else.”

  Shocked, I reared back, then gathered myself and stated, “No, Kayla, none of this has anything to do with Millie, so stop trying to blame her where there’s no blame to be had. This has to do with your mother and me, and no one else.”

  Kayla crossed her arms and asked, obviously not believing me, “Then why isn’t she coming home?”

  On home, her tone wavered, and I knew she was trying not to cry.

  I sighed, my heart heavy as I admitted, “Your mom is at a crossroads in her life. She’s trying to find who she is and what she wants to be.”

  “But she’s my mom, doesn’t she know that?”

  “Yeah, baby, she knows, but sometimes, maybe, not everyone is cut out to be a mom,” I stated gently.

  “But, she is a mom, she can’t just quit.”

  Kayla’s words echoed through my head, and oh, how I wished that were true, but the sad reality was that Julie had done exactly that. Quit.

  “She’ll always be your mom, but that doesn’t mean she’s going to be a part of our lives. She has a new life now, one that she likes, and doesn’t want to come back to the one she left behind.”

  “What about me?” Kayla asked, unable to control the tears from spilling over any longer. “Doesn’t she want me?”

  “Oh, baby,” I muttered, my own eyes filling at the utter sorrow in my daughter’s voice. “She’s a fucking idiot if she doesn’t.”

  Kayla blinked, her mouth forming an O as she said, shocked, “Daddy, you said the F word. You never say the F word.”

  And I hadn’t, at least not around Kayla . . . not ever. But if ever a time called for it, it was now.

  “I’m sorry, K, but it’s the truth. You’re the most amazing, smart, funny, beautiful girl in the entire world, and if your mom can’t see that, then she’s a fucking idiot.”

  Kayla gasped and covered her mouth, then I heard the best sound ever, when she giggled.

  “You just said it again.”

  I gave her a small smile, then held out my hands, closing them when she hurdled herself in and held her tight.

  “I love you more than anything, Kayla.”

  “I know, Daddy, I love you, too.”

  We sat there, holding each other for I don’t know how long, and although I was happy that she seemed to be doing okay, I knew it wasn’t going to be that easy. Julie’s leaving had gutted her the first time, and I had no way of knowing what the realization that she wasn’t coming back, and didn’t want to, was going to do to Kayla. All I could do was be there, and hope that would be enough.

  “What do you say we order in pizza, then stuff our faces with ice cream while we watch the new superhero movie?”

  “Okay,” Kayla’s said, her voice muffled by my shirt.

  “Great, let’s each get our pajamas on and I’ll order the pizza while you get the movie ready.”

  Kayla nodded and let me go, but before I shut her door behind me, I turned and called, “K?”

  “Yeah, Daddy?”

  “We’re going to be okay,” I promised.

  “I know,” she said, giving me her bravest smile.

  Millie

  I’D HEARD THE STRAIN IN Jackson’s voice when he called after talking to Kayla, and as much as I wanted to rush over there and be a comfort to them both, I knew it would probably have the opposite effect, so instead, I stayed home with an aching heart.

  Luckily, we’d all exchanged numbers with Ty, Rob, Rebecca, and Jan, so I’d been able to get a hold of Ty to find out when would be the best time, if any, to drop in and bring a surprise for Jackson.

  I’d made a pineapple upside down cake, which Ty and Rob had agreed was Jackson’s favorite, and was going to bring it by his classroom, along with a hug and maybe a quick kiss, to let him know I was thinking about him and was there if he needed anything.

  Ty had assured me that there weren’t any rules against visitors, and Jackson wouldn’t get in trouble with the principal
, or anyone else, if I stopped in.

  I felt a little weird dropping in while he was at work, but our schedules were so busy, and I didn’t feel right dropping by his house yet, so I figured this was my best bet. And, I promised myself I wouldn’t get in the way or stay too long.

  So, I told Ty, “Thanks,” when he let me in and led me down to Jackson’s class.

  “No problem,” Ty was saying. “I have a free period right now, and have some time before I have to set up for volleyball in the gym.” We made a couple turns and I worried I wouldn’t be able to find my way back out. “That was a dope party the other night.”

  “I’m glad you had fun,” I said with a smile, hoping I didn’t look too fussy in my blue floral dress with my hair pulled back in a tail. Dru had scoffed at me when I’d shown up to work wearing it, and had just rolled her eyes when I said I was dropping something off for Jackson really quick.

  “Okay, so he’s right in here. You can hold off until the bell rings if you want, or sneak in the back, totally up to you.”

  “Thanks, Ty.”

  “Anytime,” he said with a grin, then jogged off down the hall.

  I peered into the window of the door and saw Jackson standing at the front of the class. He looked adorable in his jeans and V-neck sweater, his glasses slightly askew and his hair messy like he’d been running his hands through it. He was currently lecturing and using his hands, a lot.

  I let my eyes wander around the room, taking in the books lining shelves, the posters of movies that had been adapted from books and plays, and the way all of the kids’ attention was rapt on their teacher.

  These were teenaged kids. And, they weren’t talking or texting, they were actually listening as he spoke.

  I placed my hand on the knob and turned it gently, quietly, then pushed the door open just enough for me to hear what Jackson was saying.

  “I know this is different than the books and plays we’ve read so far, but I assure you, it’s not less romantic, angsty, or complicated than the others. Little Women is a classic for many reasons and people love it, and sometimes hate it, in profound and very personal ways. We’re going to do this one a few Chapters at a time, then discuss. Well, sometimes discuss, other times, write . . .” This earned him a small groan, but the students were smiling when they did it. “We’ll read through Chapter Five, which will introduce us to most of the major characters in the book, and discuss initial thoughts, feelings, and maybe even start a little bracket on how you all think things will go. At the end of the book, the winner will win some Little Women fandom items.”