The Greatest Risk

  He opened his mouth, but she lifted her hand.

  “Please, let me finish,” she requested.

  He inclined his head.

  “You may choose not to believe me,” she continued. “But as I was driving there tonight, I made the decision that if this investigation went further than tonight, I would share it with you and invite you to be a part of it in terms of being with me at the Bolt. Molly, Diesel and Maddox don’t do other Doms, but they were impatient for something to be done about the situation, so they might have allowed you to observe as well if it facilitated that. They might not have, and I could have figured something else out. But I was going to give you that choice. Now as you decide whether or not to believe me, I’ll point out, if I had not had you on my mind, if I did not want to have you there with me in the way I could, I would not have worn your collar.”

  “Point taken, Simone,” he said quietly.

  Good.

  But they weren’t done.

  “As for Carvelo, Rodrigo, and the rest, you may also choose not to believe me, but I’d also decided, although I’d done it very recently, I still had made the decision that they no longer had a part in my life. It’s mostly due to you. I want a future with you, and they don’t belong in a life that includes something as beautiful as you.”

  His face began to shift to warm as he started, “Simone—”

  “But,” she said forcefully, cutting him off, “it also has to do with me. It’s been pointed out to me, also very recently, that the reasons I did all of that at all no longer factor. I don’t need to best my mother. I don’t need to survive in that world when she did not. I don’t need to inhabit that world at all. So I was going to scrape it off.”

  “I’m delighted to hear that, sweetheart.”

  She was glad he was.

  They still weren’t done.

  “What is not okay, Stellan, is having my boyfriend phone around town and warn assholes off me. That’s archaic and frankly ridiculous.”

  “I did it at a time when you weren’t letting me in, Simone,” he explained. “You weren’t taking care of yourself. You weren’t opening up to me, to the people who care about you, definitely not to yourself.”

  “Stellan, I absolutely understand the impetus. It’s still not acceptable. If you had issues, you should have talked to me about them.”

  “Darling, if you’ll remember, I tried. That wasn’t somewhere you would go. We had a deal. A month for me to try to break through. And I made moves I don’t regret to make sure you came home to me every night of that month, and then on, so I could break through and, when I did, have a future with you.”

  “Okay. I get that. But are you getting me?” she pushed.

  “I am,” he replied.

  “So, we’re understood. This is my work. I can assure you that I’m limiting it to legal activities, of a sort, but I think you understand me. But the concerns you have you need have no more. You can also not intervene.”

  “I love that you would commit so fully to the mission you had these past few days because of what that mission was,” he returned. “For, as I hope you know, I very much agree what was happening at the Bolt was deeply offensive and had to be stopped. That said, I hesitate to inform you of this, my darling, but I feel it’s vital that it’s said. You are not a superhero.”

  She stared at him.

  Stellan kept talking.

  “You cannot always save the day, the terrified, broken child inside. The junkie prostitutes having their bodies abused. The lonely sub who’s looking for a Mistress who can meet his needs who is also a woman with whom he can share his life. The rich, successful, but stupidly stubborn Dom who’s fallen in love with a remarkable woman that for some reason he will not allow himself to have.”

  Sixx couldn’t stop staring at him.

  “You are flesh and blood,” he whispered. “Capable of being harmed and hurt and worse. I love you, Simone. I want a future with you. I want to live my life beside you. I want to make children with you. What I don’t want to do is live that life terrified of losing you.”

  “You won’t lose me,” she whispered back.

  She jumped when the Scotch glass shattered against the wall.

  After that, she stepped back, in utter shock, witnessing Stellan Lange totally lose his cool.

  “You walked up to that man armed with a phone!”

  Damn.

  There it was.

  He wasn’t pissed.

  He’d been scared.

  She’d scared him.

  He’d loved his sister, she’d been harmed and hurt and worse, and he’d lost her.

  She hated that. Hated it.

  But in this instance it was vital for him to understand …

  She was not his sister.

  “I had backup, baby,” she said soothingly.

  “You have two gunshot wounds, Simone.” He walked to the dining room table and slammed his fist into the top of it twice. “Two.”

  God.

  Her man.

  He really loved her.

  “I did research on these people, honey,” she said calmingly. “I talked to regulars at the club about all the players. I’ve been there before. I did a thorough walkthrough last night. I spent the scene with D and Maddox assessing those DMs—”

  “You are not fucking understanding me,” he bit out. “One got his hand on you.”

  “I had that situation under control.”

  “He touched you, and he was twice your size.”

  “Stellan, honey, I can handle myself.”

  He looked away, dragging his hands through his hair, muttering, “Jesus Christ.”

  “Baby, you need to trust I know how to do my job. It’s my job. You need to trust in me that I can do it,” she said.

  He turned back to her. “In all my life, in truth, to the soul, right now, there are two beings who are breathing, only two, Simone, who I love. Who it would rip me apart if I lost. But only one that if I lost her, it would fucking destroy me. And that one is you.”

  “I don’t have a hero complex, honey.”

  “I read your sketchbooks.”

  “That was for Simone.”

  “You are Simone.”

  “I know.”

  His chest moved with his deep breaths.

  “We needed to have this conversation,” she said. “It’s important we get to the right place here, baby.”

  “And when we have children?” he asked. “Will you do these things when you’re a mother?”

  “I think you know Sylvie Creed.”

  He looked to the pool, and a muscle jerked up his cheek.

  He knew Sylvie.

  She was a fabulous mother.

  And she was a kickass investigator.

  “Actually, first we need to get past the when-we-have-children part,” she tried to joke.

  He turned his head and locked eyes on her.

  “You’re having my children,” he growled.

  “Okay, honey. How many do you want?” she whispered.

  “Get over here.”

  She decided to cross the great divide. Her man was emotional. He’d had a shock that night.

  Apparently, even Stellan Lange had times he needed to be soothed.

  So she went there.

  She nearly stumbled when he yanked her to him the minute she was within reach, slamming her close and holding her closer.

  Sixx wrapped her arms tight around her man.

  She let him hold her, assuring himself she was right there, in his arms, breathing, okay.

  Then she set about assuring him of other things.

  “Right here, right now, I promise never to take unnecessary risks. I promise to do my research and always be cautious and prepared. In my work for Joel, it’s rare there’s danger, but if there is, I promise I won’t go in ill-equipped in any way or without backup. There will be no occasion where I will go gung ho. Above all I will do everything in my power to come home to you, safe and sound, every night, Stellan, fo
r as long as I live.”

  With every word she spoke, his arms squeezed tighter and tighter so she was nearly wheezing when he was done.

  He got what he needed out of that hug because he took the pressure off but didn’t let her go.

  He rested his cheek on the top of her head and murmured, “I shouldn’t have called Carvelo.”

  No, he shouldn’t have.

  She didn’t confirm.

  She just said, “It’s done. We’re past it.”

  “Or Rodrigo.”

  She grinned against his chest. “Okay, baby, I get it.”

  Stellan held her and she held on.

  Eventually, quietly, she promised, “The stuff I did to get those scars, Stellan, I vow to you. It’s done.”

  “All right, darling.”

  She let out a big breath.

  “You might want to know, Susan tried to warn me about interfering with your work,” he shared.

  Sixx didn’t know her well (yet), but she had a feeling Susan was the kind of woman who would have learned about the Bolt job and taken her concerns direct to Sixx.

  “She’s pretty awesome,” Sixx muttered.

  “Yes,” he agreed.

  “It was righteous that Barclay made Beardsley sell his share in the club for a penny,” she remarked, tipping her head back.

  Stellan lifted his to look down into her eyes.

  “In getting to know him, I’ve noted that Barclay is ‘righteous’ in a number of ways. To say he was beside himself about what was happening is an understatement. Branch had to physically pull him off that Josh character when he admitted he’d suspected something was going on for weeks and he hadn’t shared.”

  “But how could he have not known before?” Sixx asked a question she’d had since the beginning. “Everyone thinks this Barclay guy is awesome, but in one night, the state of those girls, it was obvious.”

  “Apparently Barclay has recently met a woman who he’s become rather fond of, and they spend quite a bit of time together,” Stellan explained. “Also apparently, Josh has been lax on holding up his end of the partnership, but he respects Barclay and appreciates what he’s done for the club, which is Josh’s livelihood. So, to give Barclay time to be with his woman, and simply to give him a break since it seems he’s been running the club mostly singlehandedly for years, Josh told Barclay he could take a step back, and Josh would step in. Barclay agreed, continuing to do the books, supervise the bars and stocks of liquor, but gave up night management to Josh so his evenings would be free, and unfortunately handed staff scheduling to Beardsley.”

  “And thus Beardsley took advantage of that change in circumstances,” she murmured.

  Stellan nodded. “Further to that, although it’s costly, as a precaution, Barclay keeps security footage backed up for six months before he records over it. Branch’s colleague assessed it, and it appears the prostitution situation is relatively new and has only been going on for around three months. It did not escape Josh for very long, and he shared he confronted Beardsley about it repeatedly, being rebuffed. Getting increasingly panicked about it, this culminated in a nasty public argument that set him to finding an outside source to assist him in proving what he sensed to be true, this giving him the ammunition to go to Barclay so they could handle it effectively. Not an altogether wise strategy, but he was trying to do the right thing.”

  No, not wise, but at least it ended up getting sorted.

  “The dealing, however,” Stellan continued, “through Beardsley and via the DMs who were working that side job, has been going on much longer, right under the noses of Barclay and Josh, who were both unaware until last night.”

  “Why didn’t any of the members report anything?” she asked, deciding also to ask the trio the same thing, because they knew it was happening and they didn’t say anything either.

  Maybe she’d bring it up when she went over to their place for dinner.

  “Drugs are rampant everywhere, Simone,” Stellan pointed out. “And the people dealing them, and doing them, tend to be careful about other people catching them. But I would say it’s more, especially in an environment like that. What people do is their business, and not your own. Reporting decadent behavior, even illegal behavior, isn’t exactly a part of our way of life. In this instance, that could be debated right or wrong. But I can understand why members would simply let it be.”

  That made sense.

  He was right, it was debatable, but it made sense.

  Stellan carried on, “That said, it would seem to me Beardsley was gaining confidence his sideline moneymaking schemes would continue to fly under radar, considering he’d been able to deal drugs in his establishment for a long time without his partners’ knowledge or consent, recruiting others to expand the operation, all without getting caught. However, I suspect it’s easier to hide a drug deal than it is a young woman being marked with the Chinese symbols for ‘Darren’ in one of his club’s playrooms.”

  She felt her eyes get big. “Someone marked one of those girls with his name?”

  “Apparently.”

  “How do you know that?”

  “Branch’s colleague was able to track down a young woman who worked for Beardsley for a while and decided it wasn’t to her taste. She shared about the whole operation, the drugs, the DMs, the clients, the extremes.”

  Whoa.

  That guy worked fast.

  Totally impressive.

  “Is Branch’s colleague that black guy there tonight?” she asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Did you meet him?”

  “Are you asking me that because it’s clear he’s highly skilled, efficient, fast and effective, and he might be useful to you in some capacity in the future, or are you asking me that because you wish to invite him to our next dinner party?”

  She smiled up at him. “Our next dinner party?”

  “He’s not in the life, so the next party we have, he probably would be uncomfortable. But it’s apparent you’re expanding the number of people you share time with, and I have a home fit for entertaining. So yes, our next dinner party. And Cam would be an excellent candidate. He’s an interesting man, very funny and has the miraculous ability to shovel huge amounts of shit Branch Dillinger’s way, and Branch takes it. It’s fascinating.”

  Dillinger was not the kind of guy who took any shit, so that would be.

  “It sounds like, except for you getting increasingly pissed at me, you had an interesting couple of evenings,” she noted cautiously, not wanting to take him back if he wasn’t entirely over what they just went through.

  “I would hazard to say yours were more interesting.” He tipped his head to the side. “Which one is the dark one?”

  “Maddox.”

  “The man fucks like a machine.”

  Sixx smiled up at him again.

  “I didn’t have a good view, but it also appears he can take it like a champ,” he remarked.

  She cuddled closer. “He’s a very experienced switch.”

  Stellan drew her closer. “Get any pointers?”

  “I was working, baby,” she murmured.

  “Mm,” he hummed, bending and touching his nose to hers.

  Okay, so he was over what they went through.

  Good knowing he was a man who could not only talk through important issues, and do it while listening, but also get over it.

  No.

  That was excellent.

  When he pulled away, he didn’t go very far.

  “Do you wish to observe them again?” he asked quietly.

  “I don’t know. They really like having me around. We definitely connected in a way I don’t think I’ve ever really had with anybody.”

  Stellan looked wary at that, so Sixx rushed to assure him.

  “I mean in a friendship way, baby. Seriously, they all hugged me before we parted tonight, and D assured me whatever was bothering you would be okay. But as for their play, it seems very intimate, and like I said they don’t do male
Doms, and if you can’t be there it wouldn’t be any fun. I do know I’d like to get to know them all better and introduce them to you.”

  “We’ll do that, and if it goes to that place, perhaps they’ll enjoy doing their thing in our playroom for you to enjoy, and if they’re not comfortable having me around while they do, I can keep myself entertained elsewhere, and we can all share a drink after they’re done.”

  That was a surprising offer, for a variety of reasons.

  She was only going to question one.

  “You’re going to keep your playroom?”

  “Considering you don’t have the option to meet certain needs in our bed, and we’ve found it useful for other things, I think it would be foolish to dismantle it.”

  Nice.

  “Agreed,” she replied, pressing closer.

  “Darling,” he said on a squeeze. “If you were not wishing me to do that, it’s your playroom too, so you simply need to say. This is your home, and what happens in it and to it needs to be a joint decision.”

  “I will, in future,” she promised.

  “Two,” he stated firmly.

  And confusingly.

  “Sorry?”

  “Two.”

  “Two what?”

  “I want two children.”

  Sixx froze in his arms.

  He gathered her closer to his warmth. “Darling—”

  “I need … we’re just going to need…” She blew out a breath. “When you held Crosby, you were so … Stellan, but with a baby in your arms. It was awesome. It was gorgeous. It made me feel wonderful things. And terrifying ones. But you were just all that’s you, with a baby. How did you do that?”

  “No one knows how to handle a baby until they actually handle one, sweetheart.”

  Well, she’d handled one that night too, and the kid just wanted his “Steyan.”

  She didn’t remind him of that.

  She said, “Okay.”