Unrequited

  Shane watched him warily.

  “I was bitten by a sh-shark once,” Shane said haughtily.

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  “No you weren’t. You fell off your mama’s kitchen table

  when you were little and cut your leg open,” Vic told him with a

  laugh. “And you like to tell gullible lawyers that it was a shark

  bite so they’ll think you’re tough and scary.”

  “Heard that s-story already, huh?” Shane asked with a

  grin and a shiver.

  “Every time we have too much to drink and you can see

  the ocean,” Vic told him affectionately as he rubbed Shane’s

  arms harder and they bobbed together in the gently rolling

  waves. The flag flying today was a green one or they’d probably

  already have been taken by the riptides.

  “Why are we out here when it’s this cold?” Shane

  practically whined. At least his teeth had stopped chattering.

  “Because it’s relaxing. Shut up. And stop shivering,” Vic

  told him as he let him go. He kicked off the ocean floor and

  relaxed back into a full body float.

  Shane stood there shivering, watching him as Vic floated

  with his face up to the sky, and smiled blissfully at the peace

  offered by the sound of the ocean and nothing else in his ears.

  Then, just before Vic sensed the trouble coming, Shane moved,

  placing his hand over Vic’s face and shoving him beneath the

  calm surface of the water.

  Vic flailed and tried not to snort water up his nose as

  Shane held him there briefly, and when he popped back up

  Shane was laughing merrily and backing away from him with

  his hands held out in front of him.

  “It’s relaxing, Vic,” he reminded condescendingly.

  Vic leapt at him and tackled him, wrapping his arms

  around Shane’s shoulders and doing his best to pull the man’s

  feet off the sand and drag him under. Shane planted his legs

  wide and wrapped his arms around Vic’s torso, attempting the

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  same thing and handling it in a much more professional

  manner, and within seconds Vic was under water again.

  When he came back up he floated with his feet just above

  the ocean floor, not even bothering to struggle as Shane held

  him close to his body in order to prevent his attacking again.

  He blinked the water from his eyes and glared balefully at

  Shane as the man snickered and grinned.

  “Jackass,” Vic declared as he sputtered water and tilted

  his head to avoid banging his nose against Shane’s.

  Shane breathed out heavily through his nose as he tried to

  stop laughing, and Vic closed his eyes to avoid getting more

  saltwater in them. Shane had yet to let him go, and the other

  man still shivered slightly as Vic relaxed in his embrace. He

  once again let himself fall into the now-familiar feeling of

  Shane’s arms around him, enjoying how good it felt and the

  little jolt of pleasure in his chest that it caused.

  He gasped in surprise when Shane’s nose nudged against

  his cheek and the corners of their mouths brushed ever so

  slightly.

  Was Shane about to kiss him, or had it just been the

  passing wave that had pressed them close together? Vic

  immediately dismissed the idea as silly. Shane wouldn’t kiss

  him, not out here in the middle of the ocean like this. Not

  when… they were holding onto each other, their naked chests

  pressed into each other like this. Not when Shane had spent

  the night holding him to ward off nightmares. Right?

  Vic gasped again when Shane’s lips brushed against his,

  not a kiss, but certainly a gesture of intimacy that Vic and

  Shane had never shared. It seemed like time ceased to be as he

  felt the other man’s heart race in time with his and waited for

  another move to be made. What the hell was going on here?

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  This was Shane. Shane, who he’d known for five years, and

  who’d never once displayed a hint of interest.

  Shane seemed to be holding his breath as his mouth

  hovered right at the edge of Vic’s, barely pressed against the

  damp skin. Finally, he tilted his head just slightly, and Vic

  thought for certain that he was going to kiss him. He was

  slightly shocked to realize that he wanted Shane to kiss him.

  There had always been a sort of latent attraction there for Vic,

  but he’d always been too caught up in his self-destructive

  tailspin with Owen to ponder it. Vic had let anything he felt for

  Shane slide into an easy friendship with no regrets. Now,

  though, this was definitely not a friendship kind of moment.

  Vic parted his lips slightly in expectation of a kiss, but

  almost as their lips were about to touch, a swell floated them

  up and slightly apart. Shane’s head slid away as they floated

  in the trough between the first wave and the next. He didn’t

  move to try to kiss Vic again. He buried his face instead into

  Vic’s neck and mumbled, “You’re warm,” as he pulled Vic

  closer.

  Vic inhaled deeply, disappointment ripping through him

  quickly before he recovered his wits and murmured, “Told you

  it gets better.”

  “I can’t imagine how it could,” Shane whispered back to

  him.

  Then Shane pulled away suddenly and turned to make his

  way back to the beach without another word. As he watched

  him go, Vic was already in the process of wondering if he had

  imagined it all.

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  IV

  Vic stepped through the open sliding glass door and squinted

  into the relative darkness of the little cottage, looking for

  Shane. He had watched from the water as Shane had

  completely bypassed their chairs and gone straight up the

  walkway to the house, and he had known that if things were

  left unsaid about what had just happened, or not happened

  really, then there would be problems. Vic’s main problem was

  that he’d wanted that kiss more than he’d ever known.

  “What the hell, man?” he asked incredulously as he

  stepped into the cold living room, still dripping wet and gasping

  when the air from the air conditioner hit him.

  “What? I was coming back. I just got more beer,” Shane

  told him innocently as he stepped around the L-shaped

  counter and walked toward him slowly, holding out a bottle as

  he did so.

  “Not… not…. What was that?” Vic demanded in

  frustration, jabbing his thumb over his shoulder at the sea

  behind him.

  What may have been dread flashed through Shane’s eyes,

  and he lowered the beer he’d been offering and looked away

  uncomfortably. Vic remembered the day in the car when Shane

  had so kindly let him off the hook as they’d been talking about

  Owen, and he wondered if it wasn’t time to return the favor. He

  knew that they could drop it here and now by mutual consent,

  and it would never be spoken of again. It would be chalked up

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  to too much beer and too much su
n and it would simply fade

  into a funny anecdote.

  But no… no, Vic couldn’t let that happen. He had wanted

  that kiss entirely too much to let an explanation for it not

  having happened just slip away. He didn’t want this

  opportunity to fade into anything. He took a step closer and

  looked at Shane pointedly, silently demanding that the other

  man meet his stare. Shane looked at him briefly and winced.

  “I’m sorry,” Shane finally said softly. “Don’t know what I

  was thinking. Must have been the—”

  “Don’t you dare blame anything on alcohol,” Vic said softly

  as he stepped closer.

  Shane looked almost frightened then, and Vic could

  practically read his thoughts. Had he made a stupid move and

  screwed up the friendship? Vic knew this was what the other

  man was thinking, because he had thought the same thing

  after that first reckless kiss he had given Owen five years ago.

  They had been drunk on tequila, sitting around the veranda of

  some bar in the city late one night after a difficult day in court,

  when Owen had confessed to having a slight crush on Vic.

  Seconds later, Vic had been holding Owen’s face in his hands,

  trying to crawl down his throat and set up camp. Right after

  they had parted, Vic knew he’d had the same look in his eyes

  that Shane did now.

  “Were you… were you going to kiss me out there?” Vic

  asked carefully.

  Shane flushed and looked away again. “Thought may’ve

  crossed my mind,” he mumbled as he looked down, avoiding

  Vic’s eyes as best he could.

  Vic stepped closer, into his line of sight, and leaned

  forward slightly. He knew he should just let it slide, save Shane

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  the embarrassment and save his body the torment of

  wondering what Shane would feel like next to him. Beneath

  him. Inside him.

  Shane’s head jerked up and he inhaled sharply as Vic

  forced himself into his personal space. “What are you doing?”

  he whispered with difficulty as Vic’s nose brushed gently

  against his cheek.

  “Hoping that it’ll cross your mind again,” Vic whispered,

  letting his lips move ever so slightly against the skin of Shane’s

  face as he spoke.

  Shane was having difficulty breathing as Vic got closer, his

  breaths coming in short, quick gasps as Vic tilted his head

  slightly and allowed his lips to brush over Shane’s. When Vic

  parted his mouth and let his lower lip drag slowly over Shane’s,

  Shane quit breathing entirely. His eyes drifted closed and he

  tilted his head back slightly, his mouth parting as their lips

  met gently for the first time, barely grazing at the edges of their

  mouths.

  Vic edged forward more, closing his lips finally in a soft

  kiss at the corner of Shane’s mouth, and Shane exhaled in a

  short little burst of air as Vic’s hand touched his hip gently.

  Another soft kiss, and Shane tilted his head back down and

  returned the touch to his lips tentatively, his body taut as a

  bowstring in case Vic changed his mind suddenly and he had

  to beat a hasty retreat.

  Vic placed several more light, chaste kisses on the corner

  of Shane’s open mouth as the man struggled for breath, his

  lips closing gently over Shane’s and tugging coaxingly, trying to

  get him to return the kisses. Finally, he let his tongue lick

  lightly at the corner of Shane’s mouth, still tentative but

  wanting more. Shane reacted almost instantly by tilting his

  head to the side suddenly and gripping Vic to him. He crushed

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  their mouths together in an openmouthed, hungry kiss, and

  Vic moaned in surprise as he was swept up in Shane’s sudden

  burst of barely controlled passion.

  One of the beer bottles Shane held in his hands fell to the

  ground as Vic wrapped his arms around Shane’s body, and

  Shane did the same to him, holding him tightly as their

  tongues met in slow, languid laps over and over, teeth nipping

  at salty lips as they tried to get closer and closer to each other.

  The other bottle fell to the ground and clanked against the leg

  of the coffee table as it rolled and spewed beer all over the floor.

  Shane’s hands slid up Vic’s body to trap his arms where they

  were and tangle in his hair as he pulled Vic closer.

  There was no battle of wills, as Vic would have expected

  from his headstrong friend, but rather a give-and-take back-

  and-forth that thrilled him beyond anything he had felt in quite

  some time. Shane’s arms around his were strong and yet

  somehow intriguingly unconfident. Vic let his hands run over

  the smooth, slightly burnt skin of Shane’s back tentatively,

  wanting so much more even as his mind reeled over what they

  somehow found themselves doing. They both pulled back

  slightly after what seemed a delicious eternity of contact and

  clung to each other, each breathing hard and unwilling to

  release the other.

  “I don’t… know what to say,” Vic gasped as he hid his face

  against Shane’s cheek and held Shane close to him to keep him

  from being able to look him in the eye.

  Shane breathed heavily against his neck and nodded

  silently.

  “I had no idea,” he said with a little laugh as Shane tried to

  pull away. Vic held him there, unable to meet his eyes just yet.

  These were the types of conversations that should be had in

  the dark, lying in bed where you can stare at the ceiling and

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  hide your embarrassment from all but the night. “How long

  have you…?” He searched for the right word and failed.

  “Wanted you,” Shane supplied breathlessly. Vic nodded.

  “Years,” he answered in a pained voice.

  “Why didn’t you say something?” Vic asked in disbelief.

  “I knew you were hung up on Owen,” Shane admitted. “I

  didn’t want to complicate things. Vic….” He pulled away a little

  more forcefully, and Vic looked down at his sandy feet in a

  momentary panic as Shane held him at arm’s length and

  looked at him. “You okay?” Shane whispered, and Vic looked

  up at him through his lowered lashes.

  “You’re a damn fine kisser,” he murmured with a weak

  smile.

  Shane’s hand rested against Vic’s cheek briefly and then

  he smiled crookedly and began to chuckle.

  Vic couldn’t help but grin a little at the unexpected

  reaction. He snorted incredulously just before Shane kissed

  him again. Vic moaned in surprise and allowed Shane to

  control the kiss this time, distantly observing that the other

  man was more confident in his actions now.

  Vic sighed brokenly into Shane’s mouth and Shane’s

  breath hitched slightly. When he pulled back it was just

  enough to allow them to speak, their lips still brushing together

  as they did so.

  “What the hell are we doing?” Vic whispered in confusion.

  “I don’t know,” Shane answer
ed in the same tone of voice.

  “I know what I want to do,” he added in a barely audible

  whisper.

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  Vic would have thought he imagined it once more if he

  hadn’t been able to feel Shane’s lips moving and his breath

  gusting across his own lips.

  “But… this shouldn’t….” Shane trailed off and backed

  away slightly as he tried to formulate his words.

  Vic couldn’t help himself, and before Shane could

  continue, Vic pressed their mouths together with just a little

  nudge of his chin.

  Shane’s breath hitched again, a delightful sensation in

  Vic’s mouth, and Vic let his hands slide slowly down the sides

  of Shane’s rib cage until his fingertips rested just beneath the

  wet waistband of Shane’s bathing suit. He half-expected the

  intimate touch to scare Shane away, but instead Shane’s kiss

  became even more heated and hungry.

  Their bodies leaned into each other, damp skin pressing

  into damp skin, and by the time Shane finally grudgingly

  pulled away, Vic’s mind was already trying to chart the most

  direct path to the bed.

  Shane leaned his forehead against his as Vic’s dazed mind

  tried to catch up with the abrupt halt, and he stepped away

  before Vic could stop him.

  He cleared his throat uncomfortably and looked down at

  the floor as Vic swayed. Vic watched him lick his lips slowly as

  he bent over and retrieved the two bottles of beer he had

  dropped.

  “I’ve made a bit of a mess,” he murmured, as if talking to

  himself as he bent over the little puddle of spilled beer.

  Vic opened his mouth to question why they were no longer

  groping each other, but Shane seemed to have taken Vic’s

  tongue with him when he pulled away and Vic couldn’t utter a

  sound.

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  Shane turned and walked slowly away, and Vic watched

  him toss the now-sudsy quarter of a beer into the trash can

  and put the bottle that hadn’t yet been opened back into the

  refrigerator. He closed the door and then stood there in front of

  it, his hand still on the handle as he kept his head down, as if