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She didn’t know why Claire was afraid of hanging out with the ‘geeks’ because if the people that were in the kitchen were considered ‘geeks’, then she was positively ok with that. The white, smooth countertops were littered with bottles of alcohol, some larger than she had ever seen before in her life. She also noticed a few kegs of beer near the rear of the room where the bathroom must have been as there was a line-up forming, short in length now but she knew it would be so long soon enough that she’d have to fake a panic attack or minor injury if she wanted to relieve herself.
She caught Claire walking back towards her from the kitchen, carefully balancing the two liter sized glasses that were full of some blue and pink liquid, complete with a pineapple wedge on each brim.
“My own creation! Taste it!” Claire said, bringing the glass to her mouth. She took a sip and immediately felt the sugary rush and energy that alcohol brought on. She automatically took another huge gulp, suddenly super thirsty.
“Whoa, down girl, we just got here. I don’t want to hold your head above any toilets tonight!” Claire laughed, pretending to take the glass away. She grabbed for it, laughing as well, and both girls walked back into the living room where a slow song now blared out of the large speakers. The dance floor/living room had thinned out a bit but there were still a few couples swaying slowly to the rhythm.
Claire managed to snag one of the red leather love seats that lined the back wall and sat down. She placed the drinks on the white rectangular table before her and turned to Darcy, her perfectly curled hair bouncing to the music. She was beginning to feel more at ease, the insanity of the day’s event slowly leaving her mind.
“So, how’s Mason?” Claire quietly asked, trying to sound as casual as possible, but not relaxed enough for her not to notice the twinge of the urgency in her tone. She immediately remembered Mason pleading with her not to tell anyone that he was back and felt bad for having told Claire on the car ride over without even second guessing it.
“Claire – you cannot tell anyone he’s back. He made me promise,” she pleaded looking her friend squarely straight in the eyes. She needed to know that Claire was going to keep the fact of Mason’s return a secret. She still did not understand why Mason’s return was such a vital secret to be kept, but she did know that Mason meant it. Even though he was a complete jerk to her, she knew she had to keep her end of the promise.
“Yeah, whatever. Your parents are going to find out anyway – Mason’s not exactly discreet,” Claire replied, picking up her glass and taking a few big gulps. “Remember when he lost your dog?”
No, she thought to herself.
“He’ll kill me if they find out because of me,” she continued. Claire rolled her eyes, trying to appear aloof about the whole thing but she knew there was more going on than she was letting on. Before she could ask Claire more about it, Luke suddenly appeared, his head popping up between both girls from behind the love seat.
Claire squealed, nearly dropping her entire glass of blue/pink insanity. Darcy jumped, catching Luke’s coy smile. He walked around the love seat and squeezed his way in between both girls, moving one of his arms around Claire’s shoulder, and the other her own, causing her to instinctively to lean forward and drink greedily from her glass.
“The party’s pretty awesome, huh?” Luke said, taking a long sip from Claire’s glass. His arm found its way around her shoulder again once she leaned back. “Did you see the craziness in the kitchen? It’s like a bar in there. Ha-ha, Barr’s Bar.” She rolled her eyes at Luke’s attempt at making a joke.
Claire and Luke started chatting to one another, forcing Darcy to shift her attention to once again taking in the scene before her. She was hell-bent on having a good time, putting her mind on hold. She bopped her head to the music, letting the music take her to another place.
***
Once the living room dance floor filled up once again thanks to one of her favorite songs, she decided to take the plunge to get up and dance. She grabbed her drink, leaving Luke and Claire staring at her in total shock, and walked slowly to the middle of the living room. She began to move around to the beat, letting her worries fall away as she felt herself feeling happier about being part of this world – a world she only read about all of these years.
The other kids around her smiled as she bounced around. She couldn’t deny the feeling that she actually liked having all of the attention upon her because she had never experienced anything like it before. It was like she was a true-life Gossip Girl, dressed impeccably in the hottest current designers, her legs long, smooth and shiny.
She then brought her hands to her bun and unclipped it, causing the waves of dark blonde hair to fall upon her exposed shoulders. She saw Luke staring at her hungrily at her while Claire stood up and walked to the kitchen, presumably and probably to get more drinks. He began to walk towards her but she immersed herself into the throngs of dancing teens around her, feeling a random elbow hit her back.
“Oh, I’m sorry”, she blurted, composing herself, shaken from her temporarily music-induced reverie. She looked up to see a girl smiling back at her. Her face perfectly round, her eyes bright brown and wide like a baby. She instantly recognized something in the shine that those eyes emanated. Something about her made her feel almost nostalgic, which was absurd given how old she was (or was supposed to be anyway). No, not maternal. It was more of a comfortable feeling. Like she had seen the look I those eyes before…
“It was my fault. I’m notoriously known for having two left feet,” the girl replied, laughing. “This party’s pretty crazy, huh?”
“Crazy doesn’t quite explain it,” Darcy replied. She saw Luke approach her but immediately stepped back when he saw whom she was talking to.
“I think you’re friend wants to talk to you,” the girl said, and then quickly noticing Luke disappear. “Or not.”
Both girls laughed as a slow song filled the air. They walked off the dance floor to an empty spot by an enormous window that faced the backyard, which seemed to have as many kids outside as there were inside. Teenagers were swimming in the pool, throwing plastic beach balls and then animatedly diving for them. Glasses were strewn all over the tables that lined the seemingly Olympic sized pool, and speakers blared music that must have been different that what was playing in the living room as the kids outside were dancing manically, not slowly as they were in the living room.
“Chrissy must have some pretty cool parents,” the girl went on, looking at the scene outside. Darcy noticed that the girl had no drink in her hand, so she either had just arrived at the party or was driving. Or was a reforming alcoholic.
.She wanted to ask the girl her name, but realized that they may have already indeed known each other, in which case it would seem totally strange if they reintroduced themselves. Thankfully, the girl seemed to be feeling the same way as her. There was a strange confident vibe emanating from the girl and Darcy felt immediately drawn to her.
“Oh, I’m Bennett, she said. “I just moved here.” Bennett smiled at her. “You’re Darcy Platt, right?”
She was taken aback, but then remembered that she was very popular indeed. “Guilty,” she laughed.
Sonya! She felt like screaming to herself. This girl reminds me of Sonya! The perpetual confidence, the ease and pleasantness of her aura, all reminded her of her beautiful friendship with Sonya. And at that point she missed her friend terribly.
Suddenly, Claire swiftly seemed to appear out of nowhere, sizing up Bennett from head to toe. Bennett looked down, realizing she was being assessed and judged, her red Chuck Taylor’s moving around awkwardly.
“Let’s go outside,” Claire commanded, taking Darcy by the hand, moving her towards the back patio door which led to the backyard. She pulled her hand away, forcing Claire to glare back at her in anger.
“Wait, Claire – this is Bennett. She’s new here,” Darcy said. “Bennett, this is Claire Marsh”. Bennett reached out her hand towards Claire, but Claire didn’t mo
ve on iota.
“Outside,” Claire repeated. She began walking to the back door. Darcy turned to Bennett.
“Sorry – I guess she really wants to go outside. Want to come with?” she asked. Bennett shook her head.
“No, that’s ok. It was nice to meet you. I guess I’ll see you around school?”
“Totally. Have fun!” Darcy screamed, and walked towards Claire, who was beginning to seem like a toddler about to have a tantrum of gargantuan proportions.
***
The party was definitely wilder outside. The hot weather forced her to take off the orange cardigan she had been wearing and held it in her hand. The music was also much louder with mini dance floors splintering all over the back yard like a weird web of rampant teenage hormones. To her, everyone that she saw looked so carefree and so happy. She tried to let herself feel it all, welcoming the excitement and feelings of utter freedom, until Claire pulled her off to an empty spot by the side of the house just underneath the kitchen and just beside the shed, which she noted was bigger than her entire first apartment.
“What is going on with you, D?” Claire whispered, taking another sip of her quart sized cup that was nearly now empty of its green and pink concoction which was just near the top of the glass moments ago.
“What do you mean?” Darcy countered; she was honestly unaware of what was now apparently bothering her friend. She was beginning to get the feeling that Claire was not only high maintenance, but also insecure about a lot of things.
“What do you mean?” Claire mocked her voice. “What do you think I mean? You were talking to that new weird girl!”
Darcy instantly laughed out loud, although she hadn’t meant to, as it only seemed to upset Claire more. Claire’s face turned a deep shade of red, causing her to think that she was two steps away from having smoke come out of her ears.
“Why are you laughing? God, Darcy, you are being so bizarre today!” Claire continued.
“What the big deal, anyway?” she replied, not seeing why it was such a huge life-changing event because she was talking to the new, and nice, girl in school.
“The big deal is that we do not make friends with the new kids! They have to work hard to get our attention and then we have to judge to see if they’re worthy.”
Darcy, who was taking a sip of her drink that was also now empty, nearly choked when she heard Claire’s words. With more and more time spent with Claire, she truly began to dislike her.
“I was just being friendly,” she replied, looking out at all the kids in the pool, having the time of their lives without a care in the world. She wanted to be with them, splashing water and ruining her perfectly coiffed hair, having her make-up run and laughing, but instead she was off in a corner with a hot-headed teenager who clearly had anger issues. Claire was growing more and more irritating the longer and she silently questioned how this whole friendship was going to pan out.
“Go and be friendly with Rena or Luke. Or, if you’re that desperate, even Charlie,” Claire retorted, turning her back towards her and stormily walked off in the direction of the kitchen, probably with the intent of filling up her glass and getting more drunk than she already was.
“Just don’t mess everything up that we have worked so hard to get. This is high school – one small mistake and we’re back to being geeks with no friends."
She watched as Claire disappeared into the kitchen that seemed like it was ready to explode from being too full of too-tanned kids with blonde hair and teeth so white that she felt was beginning to give her a headache. She put her glass down on the concrete ground and sat on a small bench that sat just behind her.
The night breeze moved through her hair, causing a chill to run up her back. She pulled her hair back into a pony tail and put her cardigan back on. The warmth of the sweater made her feel better, but she was still as confused as ever. She had experienced more in one day than she had in the last 5 years of her life.
Staring at the party before her, she smiled. She really was here, she thought. She really was a beautiful teenage girl who had a perfect body and perfect friends, well, near-perfect friends anyway, that any 17-year-old girl would want. She had a glow, there was no denying that, and it was not just from the perpetual tan she seemed to have. It was from somewhere deeper inside – it seemed to originate from somewhere deep within her soul. This life she was thrust into was easy; going to parties on a school night, being able to choose anything out of a closet full of designer labels and not worrying if a dress she bought last summer was still going to fit her this year. She enjoyed the lack of filter she had to use, primarily because her thoughts weren’t jaded and caustic, like they were in her modern-day life.
It had always been a flaw of hers, she felt, to over-analyze things until they were void of happiness or joy or elation. She de-compartmentalized things to the point where she had convinced herself that a simple gesture, something as innocent as someone holding the door open for her, was really a commentary on the historic subordination of women as the ‘weaker sex’. She wished she could just take things at face value, like things were when she was young, free from the rent she could barely pay, before she worked at a job that she loathed (and was now fired from), which made her feel like she was nothing but a cog that did not quite fit in a wheel that kept spinning whether she wanted it to or not.
As she read the teen books that she relished with every fiber of her feeling, she had wished and wished that she could just leave her humdrum life working for ‘the man’ and just be that popular girl in high school, that girl who was beautiful and free and the object of adoration of her entire world. And here she was, that protagonist with an uncomplicated perspective on life and the popularity of Mother Teresa, and she was busy spending her time on over analyzing it, a la Darcy specialty.
She knew what was happening defied logic, but there was no mistake that it was INDEED happening. For the entire day, she had wanted to just think and be able to comprehend what indeed was going on, what Marina’s cryptic appearance earlier that day really meant. She was forgetting to recognize the magic of what was transpiring – that she had been thrust into this near perfect world which she had fallen asleep to reading every night, hoping to dream about.
She immediately felt bad for being so judgmental of Claire. Claire was just being the typical alpha female character of this genre of books – beautiful, slightly dumb, and completely territorial. She just simply didn’t know any better. She lived in a sheltered world where talking to the new girl could spell social suicide. She felt a sort of pity accompany the guilty she feelings she had.
She found herself walking rather absent-mindedly around the mansion that was Chrissy Barr’s home, the now steady wind flowing through her hair. She realized she was trying to find a solution to what was happening, a way to deal with it. She was feeling more and more overwhelmed as the hours went by, when she felt it should have been the opposite. She should have been having the time of her life – having an amazing time at the party, having fun with all of her friends, dating boys who were obscenely good-looking, but none of that was happening. Sure, she was at a party and seeing friends, but she was always thinking, always overanalyzing each situation to the point that she always had a headache.
She heard her cell phone vibrate, causing her tiny pink purse to shake. She glanced at the name flashing on her screen and let it ring. She could call Claire later. It’s not like she didn’t know where Claire was.
Then it suddenly hit her. All of this time she had been trying to act like the thirty something year old Darcy and make the choices she would make. She had been trying to make all of the right decisions, to act reserved, to act like an adult. Marina asked her to make things right, but how could she do that by not immersing herself into the life of a girl who obviously had a lot going on around her? She wasn’t focusing on getting to know the girl she now was, why she was the way she is, why she had made the choices she did. The only way she was going to make things right was to understa
nd the 17 year old Darcy. The girl with the beautiful eyes and seemingly angry brother. The girl who was apparently screwing around with her best friends boyfriend – the girl who had feelings for the gardeners’ son, whether she liked to admit it or not.
It was like a great weight had been lifted from her shoulders. For the first time she was propelled into this new world, she felt like she could breathe. She knew now what she had to do. She now had an idea on how she was going to make things right. And the first thing she was going to do was call Claire back and act like a friend. The only way she was going to figure out how to be the new her was to BE her.
Chapter 15
The next few weeks seemed to pass without any major incidents or catastrophes, aside from those that often reared in the life of a typical teenage girl in any teen fiction novel. There were no more random threats via ominous, anonymous messages or unwanted advances from her best friend's boyfriend. This relative lack of excitement was especially welcome in the life of one Darcy Platt, whom had experienced enough trials and tribulations in such a short span of time that she felt that she was going to turn prematurely grey at the ripe old age of 17.
It had taken some time, and some serious effort, for her to fully immerse in her new life and to take it not so seriously, with emphasis on the not. She made a conscious decision to put her constant judgment on the shelf and to give everyone she came across the true benefit of the doubt. For the most part, her approach was fairly successful. She was definitely having more fun than ever. Claire’s strict and hypertensive ways were even growing on her, a concept that she had found completely surprising. She was learning new things about the life of this girl (her!) every single day, though she did find it stressful at times to juggle expectations of who she was and who she is and recognizing the very fine between the two.