Early Dawn

  As Matthew bent his dark head and struggled to get the band over her knuckle, she knew she truly would love him forever, and in her heart, she knew he would love her with the same steadfastness.

  When they were finally pronounced man and wife, Matthew leaned down to settle his lips over hers. As the kiss deepened, Joseph cleared his throat. At the sound, Matthew straightened away and squeezed her hand again before they signed the necessary papers and paid the justice of the peace for his services.

  Once outside, Eden gulped the fresh air, smiling at Matthew. “I was afraid a chicken might parade through the sitting room!”

  “I was afraid you were about to call the whole thing off when he said, ‘Love, honor, and obey,’” Matthew told her with a laugh. “The look on your face was priceless.”

  Ace stepped forward to shake Matthew’s hand. “Welcome to the family,” he said. “Make her happy, and you’ll never have a quarrel with me.” Then he turned to Eden. After searching her gaze for a long moment, he winked at her. “My little sister, all grown up. I can’t believe you’re a married woman.”

  Eden grinned. “You didn’t seem to think I was all grown up yesterday evening.”

  Ace chuckled. “And I’ve never been happier to be proved wrong.”

  Eden’s other brothers followed Ace’s lead, welcoming Matthew into the family and then hugging their sister.

  “The chicken shit was a nice touch,” Joseph said as he looped an arm around Eden’s shoulders. “I’m just glad no goats attended the ceremony.”

  David laughed and lightly punched Matthew’s shoulder. “Most men get married knowing the wedding day may be the high point of their lives. You’re a lucky fellow. Things can only get better from here on out.”

  “It wasn’t that bad,” Eden protested. She patted the papers in her jacket pocket. “At least we got the deed done, and I’ve got proof that he’s made an honest woman of me.”

  David settled his hat back on his blond head and bent to kiss her cheek.

  After stocking up on supplies, including whiskey, Matthew rode with Eden and her brothers to the outside of town, where they’d set up a temporary camp. He knew Eden expected him to hit the trail the moment they arrived, but Matthew had other plans. He hadn’t been able to give Eden the ring or wedding ceremony she deserved, but he could sure as hell give her a wedding night she would never forget.

  To that end, he made camp some distance from her brothers, then went back to collect his wife. She laughed when he swept her up into his arms. “What are you doing?”

  “Carrying you across the threshold.”

  “We don’t have a threshold.”

  Matthew strode with her in his arms toward the other camp. “That’s a moot point. I’m still determined to do this right.” When he reached the fire pit he’d just built, he settled his bride on the pallet near the flames and began making them each a cup of Irish coffee. As he stirred in the sugar, he settled a smoldering gaze on her and said, “I’m going to make love to you until you’re weak, and then I’m going to make love to you again. When I ride out in the morning, you’ll have memories of tonight to hold close the entire time I’m away.”

  That sounded good to Eden, very good.

  “Is that Irish coffee you’re making?”

  Both Eden and Matthew jumped with a start. They exchanged bewildered glances as Joseph joined them by the fire. “I wouldn’t mind a cup of that. You got plenty?”

  Matthew looked long and hard into his new brother-in-law’s eyes. Then he said, “Sure. I got another jug in town. But we’ve only got two cups.”

  Joseph grinned and held up a tin mug. “I came prepared.”

  Before Eden knew quite how it happened, all four of her brothers had joined them, and Ace brought another jug of whiskey. Clearly they meant to stay a while. After two rounds of drinks, Matthew looked at each of her brothers and said, “Gentlemen, this is our wedding night.”

  “We know.” Joseph passed Matthew his empty cup. “That’s why we’re here, to celebrate with you.”

  David bent his head and tugged down his hat to hide his grin.

  Matthew mixed Joseph more Irish coffee. “Celebrating is fine. But this is Eden’s and my last night together for a good long while, and as much as we enjoy your company, we had . . . well, you know, other things in mind for the evening.”

  Joseph raised his cup in a mock toast. “To getting the cart before the horse,” he said with a smile. “You’re not the only man in this family who likes to get revenge.”

  Matthew looked nonplussed for a second, and then he threw back his head and guffawed. Everyone else laughed with him, and the wedding party began. Soon Matthew had his harmonica out, and Eden was dancing around the fire with each of her brothers. When Matthew insisted on a waltz with his bride, no one else knew how to play the instrument, so he and Eden hummed the tune of “Beautiful Dreamer.” As they whirled in the darkness, Matthew moved toward the trees. When they were far enough away not to be seen, he bent his head to steal a kiss.

  “Ach!” Ace yelled. “None of that when you’ve still got guests.”

  Matthew groaned and rested his forehead against hers. “I’m going to kill them.”

  Eden shared his frustration, but at the same time, she could see the humor. “They’ll leave soon.”

  “Promise?”

  “If they don’t, I’ll kill them.”

  It was late by the time Eden’s brothers left and Matthew could finally be alone with his bride. Fulfilling his promise, he made slow, passionate love to her until she lay weak and trembling on the pallet, her glorious hair fanned out around her head, the curls gleaming like polished copper in the firelight. In that moment, Matthew knew he’d never seen any woman more beautiful. Her body put him in mind of strawberries and cream, and every place he kissed tasted just that sweet.

  Bracing himself on one elbow, he gazed solemnly down at her. “I love you,” he told her, his voice throbbing with the intensity of his feelings for her. “God help me, Eden, I don’t know how I’ll be able to leave you in the morning.”

  She gazed drowsily up at him. “And I don’t know how I’ll let you go.” She reached over to intertwine her fingers with his. “But I have to love you enough to do it.”

  Matthew bent to trail his lips over her cheek. “I’ll come back to you, Eden. I swear it.”

  “You’d better, Matthew Coulter, or I’ll hunt you down.”

  He smiled at the memory of when she’d voiced the same threat right before he left her at the cave and then made love to her again. Afterward they slipped into an exhausted sleep, wrapped in each other’s arms.

  The following morning, they arose bright and early, breakfasted together in weighted silence, and then it was time for Matthew to go. Eden walked beside him to his horse, her whole body trembling. Saying good-bye to him was going to be the hardest thing she’d ever had to do. She could only pray that God would give her the strength to get through it.

  Matthew slipped his Winchester into the rifle boot and fiddled unnecessarily with the saddle cinch, his jaw muscle pulsing in his lean cheek. When he finally turned to look at her, he had tears in his eyes.

  His voice gravelly, he said, “Don’t say good-bye. I don’t think I can handle it. Just tell me you’ll see me soon.”

  Eden couldn’t speak past the lump in her throat. She swallowed hard. “Can I say one other thing first?”

  He nodded.

  “I love you, Matthew. With my whole heart and soul, I love you.”

  He hooked an arm around her shoulders and drew her against him, his body so taut it was like being hugged by a board. “I love you, too, more than I can ever say with words. I’m a damned fool for leaving you, Eden, but I’m afraid if I don’t go, it’ll haunt me for the rest of my life.”

  She clung to him for a moment, and then she found the strength to step back and smile up at him. “I know. Promise me you’ll be careful?”

  “More careful than I’ve ever been. I’ve got you w
aiting for me now.”

  “Godspeed, Matthew.” Eden pressed trembling fingertips to her lips and then blew him a kiss. “I’ll see you soon.”

  “Soon,” he whispered.

  Then he mounted up. Eden gazed after him, not allowing herself to cry until he was out of sight.

  Chapter Sixteen

  As her brothers broke camp and saddled the horses, Eden tried to focus on the journey ahead. She was unsuccessful. By now, Matthew would be hot on the trail of the Sebastians, and chances were good that he would find them. When he did, he would be one man against three. She couldn’t stop thinking of what might happen to him. Unless God worked another miracle, he could die. The very thought made her heart hurt. How would she live through it if she lost him?

  The southward journey home to No Name passed in a blur for Eden, one endless day of riding after another. Though Matthew had once shown her Denver on a map and told her they were several days northwest of there, she hadn’t expected the community to still be so far away. It drove home to her just how vast this country was. She and her brothers were tiny specks of humanity in mountainous and hilly terrain that seemed to stretch forever ahead of them. Even worse, so was Matthew, and he was all alone.

  On the sixth day, they finally began seeing oak on the hillsides and turned west for No Name. It was just turning dusk that evening when they finally reached the Paradise, Ace’s ranch. Dory Paxton flew out the door and down the steps, her silk skirts flapping behind her like a flag. Eden dismounted and stepped wearily into her mother’s outstretched arms.

  “Oh, God, you’re a sight for sore eyes,” Dory cried. “I thought you were gone for good. Are you hurt? Talk to me, darling.”

  “I’m fine, Mama. I lived through it.”

  Caitlin came down the steps, carrying a baby in her arms. Eden pretended to be an excited and loving aunt when she saw her niece for the first time, but in truth, she felt dead inside. At the edge of her mind, she knew little Dory was beautiful, a more perfect reflection of both her and Caitlin’s faces, but she felt nothing when she looked at her. Little Ace still looked the same, a bit taller and less chubby than when she’d seen him eight months ago, but still darling. Showing no trace of the shyness with strangers that many children his age exhibited, he clung to Eden’s legs until she bent to pick him up.

  His small face creased in bewilderment, he studied Eden for a moment, and then said, “Mama?”

  Everyone laughed, even Eden, though for her it was forced. “No, sweetie, I’m not your mama. I just look like her.”

  Little Ace still looked mystified, but in the way of children, he seemed to accept the inexplicable: that a dead ringer for his mother had just appeared in his front yard. While David and Esa took the horses to the stable, Caitlin beckoned everyone else into the house, put baby Dory in the cradle, and hurried into the kitchen to don her apron.

  “Lands, you must all be starved! Dory, will you help me get a meal on the table?”

  Ace followed his wife into the kitchen, bent her back over his arm, and gave her a deep kiss. When he came up for air, he said, “I’ve been gone over a month, and you ignore me when I finally get home?”

  As he released her, Caitlin blushed and pushed at her mussed hair. “I’ll attend to you later, Mr. Keegan.”

  “Don’t cook for me, sis,” Joseph said. “I need to get home to Rachel.” He hugged Eden, Caitlin, and his mother good-bye, then strode for the door. “We’ll drop by tomorrow for a visit.”

  “See you then,” Ace said.

  After Joseph departed, Eden, under her mother’s direction, located her trunk in one of the bedrooms, took out a nightdress, and slipped into the water closet for a much-needed bath. Ace had plumbed the house, so the tub was soon filled. She stripped off the clothes Matthew had given her, stepped over the porcelain side, and sank up to her chin in hot water, her eyes squeezed tightly closed against a rush of tears. Matthew’s shirt, Matthew’s jeans. She remembered the night he’d lent them to her and started to sob. Oh, God, where was he? She could only send up fervent prayers that he was safe and eventually would make his way back to her.

  Over the next few days, Eden frequently sneaked away to be alone so she could weep, and after she wiped away her tears, she prayed for Matthew’s safety. She kept remembering how she’d told him she wouldn’t wait for him. At the time, she’d felt justified, but now, looking back, she only felt foolish and immature. How could she have said such things to him? She loved the man with all her heart, and she’d meant it when she told him later that she would wait for him for the rest of her life. She had no choice. Never would she love another man the way she loved Matthew. Never.

  She often wondered if he recalled that horrible afternoon, if those words she’d said while in a temper still haunted him as they did her. If only she could write to him. Oh, how lovely it would be to pour her feelings and thoughts out onto paper and know that he would read them.

  The days passed as slowly as cold molasses dripping from a spoon. Eden lost her appetite again. She had difficulty sleeping. One morning when she looked in the mirror, she saw darkening circles under her eyes. She needed to get a grip on her emotions, but she couldn’t seem to do it. Matthew might die out there somewhere, and he’d draw his last breath all alone. Why hadn’t she offered to go with him? He might have accepted. Then she’d be with him now, for better or worse. That was what marriage was all about, after all, sticking by each other, no matter what. What had she been thinking to let him leave without her?

  Dory sought Eden out one afternoon and found her sitting on a hay bale in Ace’s barn. “Would you care to take a walk with me, dear? It’s a gorgeous day, and the flowers are so lovely at this time of year. I thought we might gather a bouquet for Caitlin’s table.”

  “I’m sorry, Mama. Maybe another time.”

  Dory sighed and sat on the bale beside her daughter, her skirts rustling as she got situated. “Can you tell me what’s troubling you so, darling? Maybe I can help.”

  “Nobody can help. Oh, Mama, I love him so much. What will I do if he dies out there?” In a jumbled rush, Eden told her mother about the awful things she’d said to Matthew when she first learned he meant to continue his search for the Sebastians, and how Ace had dressed her down for being so selfish and inconstant. “I deserved every awful thing Ace said to me. Matthew loves me, he does. Going after them is something he needs to do. I knew that from the start and understood how he felt. How could I have lost sight of that and become so focused on my own needs and wants? Even though we made up and I sent him away with my blessing, I worry that he’ll remember those things I said. What if he dies, and those words are the last things he thinks of?”

  Dory curled an arm around Eden’s shoulders. “Silly girl, you are not selfish and you are not spoiled. I suspect that your brother just realized you were all caught up in your feelings and making a horrid mistake. Ace thinks very highly of you, in truth. Behind your back, he sings your praises, saying you’re strong, loyal, and steadfast.”

  “He does?”

  “He helped raise you, didn’t he? He’s proud of you.”

  Eden no longer really cared what Ace thought. Her whole being was consumed by the danger Matthew was in and her fear that she might never see him again. “I can’t lose him, Mama. I’ll just die if something happens to him.”

  “No, dear heart, you’ll only think you’re dying.”

  Eden realized she was talking to a woman who had lost two men whom she’d loved. She fixed a bewildered gaze on her mother. “How on earth did you survive, Mama?”

  “By putting one foot in front of the other and focusing on my children, which is exactly what you will do if Matthew never comes back.”

  “I won’t have any children. I’ll have nothing.”

  Dory smiled softly. “Hmm. I think you may be wrong about that. I’ve heard you in the water closet of a morning. It sounds to me as if you have a bad case of morning sickness. You’re also picking at your food. I think you’re pregna
nt.”

  Eden gaped at her mother. “I’m just upset. You know how I am. I get sick to my stomach when my nerves are strung taut.”

  “Yes, but not only in the morning.” Dory gave her a hard hug. “Mark my words: We have a baby on the way. How long has it been since you got your curse?”

  Eden hadn’t had a cycle since leaving San Francisco. “I, um, can’t really recall, exactly. I should have had one when I was with Matthew, long before we ever made love, only I didn’t. I’m sure that was due to all the physical hardships I went through.”

  “Possibly, at least at first, but you’re not enduring any physical hardships now. Your body should have come right again. Has it?”

  “No, but I’m so worried, Mama. I can’t sleep for thinking of all the things that may happen to him. Couldn’t that mess up my cycles?”

  “Possibly. Nevertheless, I intend to get busy on a layette. I believe it’s time to get out my crochet hooks.”

  Eden curled her hands protectively over her tummy. As worried as she was about Matthew, incredulous joy moved through her. Even if he never came back to her, maybe he’d left part of himself behind. She smiled at her mother through tears.

  “Do you really think . . . ?”

  Dory chuckled and pushed erect, smoothing her skirts as she met her daughter’s disbelieving gaze. “Darling, I was evidently neglectful when we discussed the birds and the bees. Every time I failed to use a bit of sponge soaked in vinegar when I made love with either of my husbands, God rest both their dear souls, I got pregnant. Joseph used to tell me he could get me with child by hanging his britches on the bedpost. You’re my daughter, and if I failed to mention that you probably inherited a propensity to conceive at the drop of a hat, I failed as a mother.”

  Eden laughed tearfully. “Mama, you never talked with me about the birds and the bees.”