My Heart's Desire

  “How gallant of him! And just what sort of payment did you offer him?”

  “I thought I would leave that up to you,” she replied, totally oblivious to the meaning of his words.

  Drake’s eyes were now blazing with a rage that equaled Geoffrey’s. “No payment will be necessary, Lord Sudsbury.”

  “I see. Does, that mean my daughter has already settled her debt?”

  Alex felt totally bewildered. Seemingly, Drake was offended by her father’s offer of money, and her father was enraged because he thought Drake was an accomplice in Alex’s plan to escape. She frowned.

  “Father, Drake had no idea that I was aboard his ship until after we had left London. I offered to pay my way, but he refused.”

  “‘Drake’, is it?” Geoffrey paid no attention to the remainder of Alex’s statement, but latched on to the casual use of Drake’s given name. “Apparently it was a most interesting voyage.”

  “Father—” Alex began.

  “Enough! I have heard quite enough!” Geoffrey exploded. “Now that you are here, daughter, you will have to face the consequences of your foolhardy actions.”

  Drake heard the implicit threat immediately. Alex heard only that her arrival had been accepted at last, and that the worst of her ordeal was over. She brightened instantly.

  “Yes, of course, Father.”

  Geoffrey’s smoldering gaze swept over Alex, then dropped to the floor beside her. “Where are your trunks?”

  “I have none, Father,” Alex declared cheerfully. “I came only with what I am wearing now.”

  Lord Sudsbury swallowed whatever he wanted to say, regaining his control with difficulty. “I see. Then we will arrange to have suitable clothing provided for you at once. In the interim one of the servants will show you to your room.”

  She beamed. “Oh, that would be wonderful, Father! I do want to rest, but only for a short while. There is so much I want to see, so much—”

  “Alexandria, I have dismissed you,” he cut off her enthusiastic discourse.

  Alex flushed. “Yes, Father.” Head held high, she crossed the room, pausing by the bookcase where Drake still stood. “Drake, I just want to thank—”

  He shook his head, halting her words. “Do what your father says, princess,” he told her in a quiet voice meant for her ears alone. “I will not be departing from York for several days. The supplies must be loaded and the men given a chance to rest before our return voyage. I will not leave without saying good-bye. However”—he raised his voice back to a normal tone—“I believe your father would like to speak to me alone right now.” Over Alex’s head, he calmly met Geoffrey’s challenging stare.

  “Indeed I would.”

  Alex looked uneasily from the hard, angry lines of Drake’s handsome face to the restrained fury in her father’s expression.

  “It’s all right, Alexandria,” Drake told her in a low, soothing voice. “Go upstairs and rest.”

  With a resigned sigh, Alex left the room.

  Geoffrey waited until the sound of her echoing footsteps had disappeared in the distance. Then he spoke.

  “Suppose we dispense with the small talk, Lord Cairnham,” he suggested in a scathing voice.

  “All right,” Drake agreed, steeling himself for an ugly confrontation.

  “As I see it,” Geoffrey said through clenched teeth, “we have two choices. Either I call you out and defend my daughter’s honor …”

  “Or?”

  “Or before you leave for England Alexandria will become your wife.”

  A deadly silence filled the room. Moments passed.

  At last Drake spoke. “Your ultimatum is absurd.”

  “You have compromised my daughter,” was the terse reply.

  Drake controlled his temper with a great effort. “Your daughter is untouched.”

  “Knowing your reputation, I sincerely doubt that.”

  “Knowing your daughter, you should not.”

  Geoffrey gave a harsh laugh. “My daughter is headstrong and opinionated and would dare anything to defy me.”

  Drake looked startled. “She wants only to please you.”

  “By stowing away aboard a merchant ship that is captained by a notoriously irreverent nobleman with the morals of a snake?”

  Instead of being insulted, Drake looked amused by Geoffrey’s accurate assessment of his character. “Alexandria has no idea of who I am.”

  “I surmised as much.” Geoffrey studied Drake for a moment, then walked over to a table that held several crystal decanters and poured himself a healthy portion of brandy. He took a deep swallow before he spoke again. “Frankly I have no interest in knowing why you kept your true identity from Alexandria. The fact remains that you have spent numerous nights at sea with my unchaperoned daughter. Today is the twelfth of June. You left England on the …”

  “Thirtieth of March,” Drake supplied helpfully.

  “Then you were alone with Alexandria for over two months. During which time—”

  “Nothing happened.” Drake had had enough. He faced Geoffrey directly, feeling as much disgust as he did anger. “I simply delivered your daughter to York. She was assigned her own quarters, and everything was quite proper. The subject of payment is absurd, since you and I both know that I have more money than I need or want. So,, now that we’ve both had our say”—he turned and opened the library door—“I will take my leave.”

  “I will ruin your family name.”

  The cold, calmly spoken words halted Drake in his tracks. “What?” He turned, incredulous, toward Geoffrey, who was dispassionately sipping his brandy.

  “I said I will ruin your family name,” Geoffrey reiterated, slowly lowering his glass to the table. “Surely even a rebel like you must have some regard for honor?” Seeing the shocked expression on Drake’s face, he nodded. “I can see that you do. Good, honor is a fine quality in a husband.”

  “Why would you want to do this?” Drake asked, his tone deceptively quiet. The anger he felt toward this overbearing man was extreme. It was true that Drake was irreverent about his future title and position, but he felt a great responsibility toward his family … or at least most of its members. Images of Samantha flashed through his head. She was young, but not too young to be affected by a scandal. And his father, though ailing, would be destroyed by a tarnishing of the family name. It was ironic, after all the decadent behavior in the family, that an act of total innocence had the potential to ruin the Barretts. But such were the rules of the ton—absurd, yet consistent.

  Another, more surprising, realization overshadowed his train of thought, and that was that the idea of marriage to Alexandria neither repulsed nor upset him. She was so intelligent and spirited that he would never be bored by her. She was genuine in her likes and dislikes, never resorting to trickery to achieve her ends. She was as close to trustworthy as any woman could ever be.

  And he wanted her.

  The thought of finally possessing the beautiful body that haunted his dreams and fired his loins was quite an enticement to marriage. As for his inexplicable feelings of tenderness … those, he would simply control.

  The comical thing was that Alexandria wouldn’t want him. That thought almost made him laugh out loud. After being sought after by more females than he could count, for every type of liaison imaginable, he had met the one woman who would want neither his title nor his money. Oh, she wanted him sexually. That he knew, just as he knew that he could make her moan with passion, feel things she had never dreamed possible. The problem was that the one she wanted was a ship’s captain. A simple man and a simple life.

  He could give her neither.

  Geoffrey was speaking, and Drake forced his mind back to the situation at hand.

  “I am doing this, Lord Cairnham, to ensure a secure future for my only child. I take it from your silence that the idea of marriage to Alexandria does not offend your sensibilities?”

  Drake walked back into the room, slamming the door behind him. “Tha
t is not the issue here,” he shot back. “The issue is that your daughter has no desire whatsoever to be my wife.”

  “She should have considered that before she boarded your ship.”

  “So now she must pay for her folly by being forced to marry a man she hardly knows?” Drake was incredulous.

  “Arranged marriages are hardly unusual in our circle, now, are they?”

  “This is not arranged; it is forced.”

  “So be it.” Geoffrey shrugged. “The fact remains that if word of Alexandria’s escapade should become known back in England, she will no longer be considered a suitable wife for any of the eligible men I had in mind for her to meet during the Season. And even if the specifics are not uncovered by the gossips who populate the ton, my daughter disappeared at the height of her first London Season. Do you believe for one moment that this has gone unnoticed? My poor wife must have had quite a time explaining the situation without damaging our reputation. The only way for us to save face is for Alexandria to return to England a married woman.” He smiled, refilling his glass. “And the future Duchess of Allonshire as well. Ample compensation for the damage that has been done, I should say.”

  Despite Drake’s anger, he could not challenge the merit of Geoffrey’s logic. Alexandria was, in many ways, ruined. Drake had not ruined her—she had, in fact, ruined herself—but apparently it was up to him to restore her respectability.

  An interesting twist of fate.

  “Her reaction will not be pleasant,” he warned Geoffrey.

  “Perhaps not. Ultimately, however, she will do as I tell her.” Geoffrey poured a second glass of brandy and offered it to Drake. “I will not inform her of your real identity, Captain Barrett. That delightful task I will leave for you.”

  Drake accepted the glass, thinking of Alex’s reaction to the news. Fireworks would ensue, a manifestation of her passionate nature.

  He could hardly wait to take her to bed.

  Geoffrey raised his glass. “To the future Duke and Duchess of Allonshire.”

  Drake raised his glass as well. “To Alexandria,” he replied. “May she be up to the challenges that lie ahead.”

  Geoffrey studied Drake thoughtfully. “I believe, Lord Cairnham, that my untamable daughter has finally met her match.”

  A slow smile curved Drake’s mouth. “Perhaps, Lord Sudsbury, we both have.”

  Chapter 12

  BRIGHT SUNLIGHT PLAYED INSISTENTLY upon Alex’s closed eyelids, demanding that she open them and greet the day. Gloriously aware of the absence of motion all around her, Alex resisted the relinquishing of sleep and snuggled back down into the warm blankets. Vaguely she wondered why La Belle Illusion was so still and why her berth suddenly seemed so luxurious. It was almost as if she were someplace else.

  Her eyes flew open as memory reasserted itself. The dark, sparsely furnished room in which she found herself was her new home. She was in York.

  After throwing back the covers impatiently, Alex scrambled out of bed. Apparently she had been more fatigued than she had imagined herself to be. It was obvious from the position of the sun, high in the sky, that it was almost noon.

  Yesterday had been a most disconcerting day. She had been ushered into her chambers by a flustered servant and left there to rest. But Alex’s excitement had not permitted sleep to come. After several unsuccessful attempts to drift off, she had given up and gone in search of her father. One glance had told her that the library was empty. That meant that whatever had transpired between her father and Drake had been settled. She only hoped that Drake had at last accepted her father’s generous offer of compensation.

  Upon questioning some of the servants she had discovered that her father had gone off to Fort York for an important meeting and was not expected back until late in the day. She had contented herself with exploring the mansion. Though it was modest compared to Sudsbury, Alex recognized that it was considered to be ever so grand a home in Upper Canada. She longed to return to the waterfront, to sail on Lake Ontario. But she didn’t dare venture outside without her father’s permission; she had no desire to further incite his wrath. And so she had waited, taking her evening meal alone and finally retiring to her room, restless and lonely.

  But today was another day, she thought cheerfully, as she brushed her thick hair until it shone. She had no patience or desire to ring for a servant to arrange her hair or to help her don the lovely gown that had been hastily sewn and brought to her room the previous day. The months at sea had taught her to tend to her own needs. And really, if one thought about it, it was quite absurd for one perfectly able adult to be dressed by another.

  She stood and surveyed her appearance in the gilt-framed oval mirror that stood in the corner of the room. The lemon yellow gown made her look soft and feminine. Well, that should please her father—perhaps enough to make him agree to provide a small skiff for her use? With a conspiratorial grin at her reflection, she left the room and headed down the winding staircase. Victory was but a moment away.

  Lord Sudsbury looked up from his desk at the sound of Alex’s knock.

  “Come in, Alexandria.”

  She entered the room with a dazzling smile. “Good morning, Father. I hope I am not interrupting?”

  Geoffrey Cassel shook his head, put down his work, and walked around the desk. “No, I am glad you’ve come. I need to speak with you. Unfortunately I was called away yesterday before I could do so. But that couldn’t be helped.”

  Alex was itching to know if the meeting had anything to do with the message to Brock or with Drake’s suspicions of war. But if there was anything Lord Sudsbury disliked more than Alex’s independence it was her curiosity about things that “did not concern a woman”—of which politics was definitely one—so Alex held her tongue.

  “I have resolved things with Lo … Captain Barrett,” he announced.

  Alex brightened. “I’m glad, Father. He is a trifle arrogant, but he really is a very good man.” One whom I shall find hard to forget, she added to herself.

  “I’m glad you feel that way, daughter.”

  “Oh, I do!” Alex praised. “He is a superb leader, somewhat stubborn and unyielding, but nonetheless respected by all those beneath him.”

  “Really.”

  “Yes.” She nodded, warming to her subject. “He lends his strength to those who need it, is extremely kind and loyal to those who have earned the same from him, and is generous to those who are worthy of his generosity.”

  “He sounds like a most exemplary man.”

  Tenderness constricted Alex’s throat. “He is.”

  “Then how fortunate you are.”

  “I?” She was puzzled. “Why am I fortunate?”

  Geoffrey leaned back against his desk and smiled. “Because in precisely one fortnight you will become Captain Barrett’s wife.”

  “His what?” Alex gasped.

  “His wife.” Lord Sudsbury regarded his stunned daughter impassively. “Oh, come now, Alexandria. Surely you are not that shocked by the consequence of your adventure.”

  “I certainly am.” Twin spots of color burned in her cheeks, as fury and disbelief threatened to envelope her. “Father, I cannot… will not … marry Drake Barrett!”

  “Oh, I assure you, my dear, you can and you will.”

  “But why? Why? I’ve done nothing to be ashamed of, nothing that could damage my reputation to such a degree that it would drive you to take such a drastic measure.” There was pain in her broken question, pain and hurt.

  Geoffrey was unmoved. “This measure is hardly drastic, Alexandria. Drastic is an impetuous young woman stealing away aboard a ship without the permission of her parents or the presence of a proper chaperon and expecting there to be no ramifications of her actions. That is drastic.”

  “And so I am to be punished by being married off to the first available man?”

  “Not to just any man, Alexandria, to the man who has compromised you.”

  “But we’ve done nothing!”

/>   Geoffrey shrugged. “That may or may not be so. Unfortunately, in the eyes of the world it matters not whether you are innocent or guilty. The fact that you were with Captain Barrett on his ship for all these weeks is damning enough. To anyone of significance you are indeed a fallen woman.”

  “And who is ‘anyone of significance,’ Father?” Alex’s anger was back. “Your precious ton? Those immoral, judgmental, tongue-wagging gossips who have nothing better to do with their time than to discuss the lives of others and determine their acceptability or lack thereof even as they themselves are being similarly dissected by other upstanding members of our class?”

  “Enough of your impudence, daughter!” Lord Sudsbury would be pushed just so far. “Despite your low opinion of our peers, they are in a position to destroy you and, ultimately, me. So cease your tirade at once! On the twenty-seventh of June in this very house you will take the vows that bind you to Drake Barrett for good or for ill!”

  Both father and daughter had voiced their anger loud enough for anyone on the first floor of the manor to hear. Fortunately the argument was not overheard by the servants, as most of them were occupied elsewhere in the spacious home. Unfortunately, it was overheard by the dark-haired man who stood in the hallway just outside Geoffrey’s study.

  Drake had risen early after a fitful sleep and headed to the governor’s home to see Alexandria. He had hoped to soften the blow and ease what he knew would be her furious, shocked reaction to the news of their betrothal. When he arrived, the same unfriendly butler informed him that Lord Sudsbury and Lady Alexandria were “unavailable”, and that Drake would have to wait. Alone in the hallway, Drake heard Alex’s angry voice, and frankly curious, he remained to listen.

  Alex’s mind was working frantically. She realized that there might be no way out, that she was trapped. Her father was unyielding in his decision, unaffected by her pleas or her anger. And all because the damned beau monde would blanch over her unseemly conduct. Well, what about their inevitable reaction when they learned that Lord Sudsbury’s only daughter was married to a lowly sea captain?

  Alex grasped wildly at her last hope.