Uncivilized

  After the day and a half travel back, I stayed another two days on the river talking to various Indians that came to the hub to trade goods. The only thing I was able to glean was that there was a rumor the Matica and the Caraicans had reached a peace pact, and they were not at war. No one seemed to know where the Caraicans had gone.

  With no other options available, I took a charter flight to Sao Paolo and returned home to the States. Bitterness was a black scourge upon me because I had learned nothing new that would ease my heart. Zach was truly lost to me forever, and there was nothing left for me to do now except to try to figure out how to pick up the pieces and heal myself from this pain.

  When I reached Sao Paolo, I immediately called Randall to update him on my failure. As Lisa said, he happily funded my expedition, as anxious as I was to hear news of Zach. Like me, he had no expectations that Zach would return, but he was terribly worried about his welfare and was hoping at the very least that he and I would be able to share a mutual peace of mind.

  When Randall got on the line, it was a little difficult to understand him with the connection I had. "Moira... is that you?"

  "Hi Randall," I said, trying to put a smile in my voice that I know failed miserably. "I'm in Sao Paolo now."

  "How are you doing?" he asked, which I thought was odd. Why wasn't he immediately pumping me for information about Zach?

  Ultimately, I was too tired to try to ponder that further, so I told him, "I'm fine, but I'm sorry, Randall... I couldn't find Zach."

  "Oh... well, okay. You tried and that's all you can do," he said, almost distractedly.

  "Are you okay?" I asked him, because he sounded a bit off.

  "Fine, fine," he assured me. "Just a little bit... um... disappointed, I guess. So, when are you coming back?"

  "I fly out tonight and should be in Chicago tomorrow morning," I tell him, stifling a yawn. I'm hoping I can crash in one of the terminal chairs and catch a little nap.

  "Okay, my dear. Well, have a safe flight and we'll talk when you get back," he said.

  I hung up from my call with Randall, utterly confused. Maybe he was just grieving and couldn't process what I was telling him. I thought he'd demand to know everything I did to find Zach, but maybe he's just waiting until I get back in deference to me. He has to know my inability to find him is weighing heavy on my shoulders.

  Fishing my keys out of my pocket, I make the long walk up my sidewalk. Okay, it's not so long... maybe only twenty feet, but it's twenty feet too long as tired as I am. Lifting my chin in resolve as I put my key in the lock, I decide that I'm too tired to make it to my bedroom... but I won't succumb to the floor. The couch will be a nice, happy medium.

  I turn the knob and push the door open, letting my pack fall to the floor and immediately eying the couch. I trudge my way there, not even bothering to take my shoes off. Resting one knee on a cushion, I fall face-first into the comfort that is calling me to sleep.

  Snuggling into the softness, I close my eyes and sigh. I immediately start to slip under, and a dream comes upon me.

  "Moira." I hear Zach's voice.

  Oh, that sounds lovely. Rich, full of timber and emotion. I can imagine his beautiful eyes and his magnificent body. I remember the last time we were together as he fucked me, then as he held me after and let tears slip out of his eyes against my skin.

  "Moira," he says again, and he sounds a bit louder this time. A bit clearer.

  My eyes fly open, and I hear it again. "Moira."

  I scramble up onto my knees and peer over the back of the couch... into my kitchen, where I see Zach sitting there at my kitchen table. He's wearing a pair of dark-washed jeans and an olive-green T-shirt. His feet are bare and his hair is wet. Blue eyes burn into me with intensity.

  I rub my own eyes furiously with my hands and look back again.

  Yup... still there.

  Maybe I'm hallucinating. Maybe I got some type of fever or infection while in the jungle. Yes, that coupled with lack of food and sleep the last few days, I'm surely just imagining that Zach is sitting in my kitchen.

  I flop down with frustration onto my back on the couch and squeeze my eyes shut, willing myself to fall asleep.

  "Come on, Moira. Stop playing around," Zach says.

  Holy fuck.

  He's really here.

  In my house.

  While I've been traipsing around the jungle looking for him.

  I come flying off the couch and round it with a speed that belies the exhaustion I'm feeling. Zach stares at me, a small smile curving his lips up as he watches me stride toward him. He stands from the chair and opens his arms to me, and I fly at him.

  My hands reach up and I slap them to his chest, shoving with all my might. His eyes flare in surprise and he stumbles backward, the kitchen chair catching him behind the knees. He falls down into it with a thud.

  I lean in and shove at his chest again, although I don't budge him an inch this time.

  "You asshole," I snarl furiously. "What are you doing here?"

  I expect Zach to give me a sheepish apology for breaking my heart, for leaving me... for making me worry, and most of all, for causing me to go half a world away just to make sure he was okay.

  Instead, he surges up out of the chair and clasps my face with his hands. Jerking me to him, he crushes his mouth to mine, thrusting his tongue into my mouth and giving me the hottest, wettest, deepest kiss of my life. He growls low in his throat, and my bones liquefy.

  Oh, to feel his hands on me... his eyes searing me with lust when he pulls away marginally. He leans in and kisses me again, our teeth knocking together with brutality. He bites at my lip, sucking it into his mouth as he pulls my hips inward and grinds his erection against me.

  Zach tears his lips away and reaches down to my T-shirt, whipping it over my head. I open my mouth to argue with him but he kisses me again, effectively shutting me up. His hands work at my canvas belt, finally my button and zipper, and then he's shoving my pants and my underwear down to my knees.

  "What do you think--?" I start to say but he kisses me again, his tongue mating with mine so I'm robbed of any power of speech. My breathing starts getting harsh as his hands roam over my body, pinching at my nipples through my bra.

  He cups me between the legs and hisses when he sticks a finger in me, "Wet baby. I knew you'd be."

  My mind is spinning and there's a small part of me that is yelling at me to stop this assault, but the other ninety-nine point nine percent of my body is screaming at him to hurry up and just fuck me.

  Zach doesn't waste any time. His hand goes around to the back of my neck, and he pushes me down to the kitchen floor. The linoleum is cool against my knees, and I know it will feel cold against my cheek as I watch the floor rise to meet me while Zach puts me in the same position that started all of this between us.

  Harsh pants fill the room... mine, Zach's... we're both desperately on edge. I can hear the scrape of his zipper and then his hands are at my hips. He places the head of his cock against the back of my pussy and starts rotating his hips, working his way into my body. When he gets about an inch or so in, he finally grabs ahold of me hard and slams his way home.

  I cry out, "Oh, Zach."

  He answers me with a guttural moan and says, "I've missed you so much."

  Those words melt my heart. Then he melts my body as he starts to thrust in and out of me, holding me in place by my hips.

  "Oh, Moira," he pants as he moves with such deliberation... such care. "You just don't know. You just don't know."

  His words are broken and coarse, his breath practically wheezing from his exertions. I feel a sudden buildup of pressure between my legs, then an orgasm is tearing its way free even as my heart starts filling up with joy that at this moment... this very moment... Zach has returned to me.

  Zach slams into me one more time and digs his fingers into my skin, roaring out his release, which I can feel coating my the walls of my pussy. He collapses onto me, rolling us so he can p
ull me into his arms. He presses his mouth to the back of my head and kisses me, then we lay like that for a while as our breathing starts to go silent.

  I don't know what to say to him. He's here.

  In my house.

  Alive.

  Sudden joy over what this means courses through me.

  Yes, he's alive.

  And yes... he's here with me.

  Zach suddenly releases me and pushes up from the floor. I watch, completely boneless, while he tucks his cock back in his jeans and zips up. He then bends down and scoops me up in his arms.

  Without a word between us, he takes me into the bathroom and sets me down gently. Turning away from me briefly, he turns the shower on and adjusts the temperature.

  When he turns back to me, he leans in and gives me a soft kiss. "I missed you."

  "You already said that once," I murmur, my head still spinning that he's standing here... with me.

  "I plan on saying it a whole lot more, so get used to it," he says with a grin.

  Zach kneels down before me, taking off my hiking boots and socks. He peels my pants and underwear off me, and I use the opportunity to touch him by resting my hands on his shoulders for balance. I even drag my fingers through his hair, loving the soft but slightly longer locks. He purrs under my fingertips and nuzzles my stomach briefly.

  Standing up, he alleviates me of my sports bra and then takes off his clothes before pulling me under the hot spray of water.

  Zach washes me, oh so gently. He takes great care massaging shampoo into my hair and working the conditioner in so every piece is coated with the silky liquid. He lathers his hands and runs them over every square inch of my body, his eyes never leaving the path that his trails are blazing. He's oh so gentle between my legs, making this not about sex, but about caring for my body in a way he never has before.

  When I'm clean, he wraps me in a towel and proceeds to soak up every drop of water from my skin.

  Then I'm up in his arms again, and he takes me to my bedroom, where he peels the covers back and places me in bed. Crawling in beside me, his hands reach out to pull me in close... my front to his.

  My cheek settles against his chest, which beats a steady tune, and we just lay in the silence. Zach strokes my back and presses kisses to my forehead, yet he says nothing. My eyes start to get heavy and, before I know it, I fall asleep.

  My eyes fly open, and the first thing I notice is that it's dark outside. My room is lit softly by the small table lamp that sits to my right, but it casts heavy shadows outside of the perimeter of my immediate vicinity.

  I turn to the other side of the bed and see it's empty and, for a brief moment, I think maybe I dreamed that Zach was here. But no... I'm naked in my bed and clearly, someone was lying beside me as evidenced by the rumpled covers.

  Lifting my head up, I glance to my right and my heart stutters. Zach is in a small settee chair that sits beside my window. The moonlight filters in across his dark hair, casting silver glints on it. He's beautifully naked, his long legs stretched in front of him. He has one hand resting lazily on his thigh, the other cupping his chin in his palm while his elbow rests on the chair.

  "What are you doing over there?" I ask, my voice still rough with lazy slumber.

  "Watching you sleep," he says simply. "You must have been exhausted."

  I nod my head and rub my eyes. "Yeah... I guess I was."

  Zach pushes out of the chair and walks to the end of the bed. My throat goes dry at his complete magnificence. He looks cut from marble; the dark shadows in the room making the angles of his muscles look almost harsh in their formation. His cock is half erect, and I lick my lips as I stare at it in fascination.

  "Eyes up here," Zach chides, and my face goes red as I look up at him.

  He bends over, pulling the cover and sheet away from my body. My nipples go erect from the cool air hitting them, as well as Zach's hot gaze.

  Slowly raising a knee up, he crawls onto the end of the bed and makes his way up my body, pushing my legs apart as he goes.

  Never one for subtlety, his hands cover my mound and pull the swollen folds of my center apart. His mouth descends on me, his tongue shockingly hot and probing. I groan deep in my chest, my hands coming up to his hair to dig in tight and hold him in place.

  Zach uses his tongue and his lips to love on me... in a way that I know he loves, because he's done it to me often enough. He's become so skilled at his oral play that, within just minutes, he has me cresting in climax, but he doesn't let up on me. He keeps at me, lashing at me with his tongue, sucking hard and then gently at me. His fingers come in to play, and he keeps his face between my legs for what seems like hours until I come again.

  My fingers pull tight on his hair, and he lifts his head up to me. I can see my moisture glistening on his lips from the lamplight, and he gives me a sinful smile.

  "More?" he asks.

  I shake my head, and he looks disappointed.

  "What are you doing here, Zach?" I ask, my need for answers demanding this be addressed.

  Sighing, Zach continues to crawl up my body, where he settles his hips against mine and rests his elbows to the sides of my rib cage. Leaning down, he kisses me softly... so softly I barely get a taste of my essence clinging to his lips.

  "I came back for you," he tells me when he pulls his mouth away from mine. "I never should have left the way I did. It was wrong, and I'll always regret it."

  "I went looking for you," I tell him, my voice small, the hurt over his abandonment coming out fresh again.

  "I know," he says as he stares down at me. "I called Randall when I got to the States, and he told me you were there. I was going to get on a plane immediately and fly back over there to find you, but he urged me to wait."

  "And you've been here at my house the whole time?"

  He gives me a sheepish grin. "For three days and... um... I sort of had to break in. You're kind of missing a small pane of glass on your back door, but I taped over it."

  "You broke into my house?" I ask with amusement.

  "I didn't have anywhere else to go," he says as he leans down to kiss me again.

  "Not true. You could have gone to Randall's. You could have gone to a hotel."

  "No, I couldn't have. I needed to be as close to you as possible. I missed you so badly; this was the only place I could be. And I was going crazy with worry, knowing you were out in the Amazon... alone... unprotected. It was torture waiting for you."

  "Now you know how I felt when you left," I say in a chastising voice.

  "I know," he says softly and lays his head on my chest. I can't help myself. My arms come up to circle around his head, and I hold him tight to me. "I'm so sorry, Moira. I was out of my mind with worry and grief, and I let it push you aside. I should have never done that."

  I hold him to me, feeling his skin against mine... feeling his warm breath against my breasts. "Randall told me that you had made the decision to stay with me... just that morning before you left."

  Lifting his head, Zach looks at me sincerely. "Yes. I wanted that more than anything. I still want that... if you do."

  "You'd leave your home... forever... to be with me?"

  "I'm here, aren't I?"

  "Yes, but for how long? For all I know, this was just a chance to get another fuck in," I say quietly.

  Leaning down, Zach takes a nipple into his mouth and tugs on it gently. When it pops free, he looks up at me with dark eyes. "Yes, I plan on fucking you a lot. Hard and repetitively, and I'm going to be taking that ass again soon because there is nothing fucking better than to be lodged deep inside of you that way. But... you and I both know this is a whole lot more than just about fucking. This is about the heart."

  Said heart seizes, constricting inward, and then bursting out in hopeful abandon. "It is?"

  "You know it is," he says with confidence. "I have fallen so deeply in love with you, that there is no where I can possibly be except by your side. Nothing means as much to me as you, Moi
ra. Not Caraica, not Paraila, not the tribe. It's you. It will only ever be you."

  Tears fill my eyes, because I am so joyful to be hearing those words from Zach's beautiful lips. My hands come up and caress his face, pulling him down to me for another kiss.

  It's light and gentle, filled with love, care, and tenderness.

  "Tell me you love me too," Zach says urgently. "I only heard it once from you, and I need to know you still feel it... deep down here." Leaning down, he presses a kiss over my heart.

  "Yes, Zach," I breathe out in a rush. "I love you so much. I nearly died when you left me. I was so crushed. Please don't do that to me again."

  "Never," he vows just before bringing his mouth down on mine for a punishing kiss. I groan and my hips arch up. His erection lays heavy against my lower belly, and I rub up against it.

  Hissing through his teeth, Zach rears up, pulling me in his arms. He rolls so he's underneath me and I come up on top, straddling him.

  "Ride me, Moira," he commands.

  I swallow hard and place one hand on his chest for leverage and with the other, I grab onto his cock. I give it a hard squeeze, which causes Zach to moan, then I position it to my entrance and slide oh so far down his length.

  I feel deliciously tight and full when I'm completely impaled on his massive shaft. Before I can start to move, Zach's hands reach up to cup my face. He pulls me toward him and leans the rest of the way up, so our mouths can meet again. He kisses me once more, as if he can't get enough of that intimate touch.

  When he releases me, he lays back down flat and brings his hands to my hips. "Remember the first time we made love this way?"

  I nod with a smile.

  "You liberated me that day... made me see that I didn't have to have absolute control all the time. You tamed me... showed me how to be a civilized man."

  I laugh low in my belly and rub my hands on his chest. "Silly man... I could never civilize someone like you. I wouldn't want to."

  "I'm not that wild man you brought out of the jungle anymore. I've learned to adjust... to accept... to experience."

  "Because you are an amazing man, Zacharias Easton. Still wild... completely beautiful to me... and always evolving."

  Zach surges upward, wrapping his arms around me and driving his cock in just a little deeper. I give a soft moan but focus on Zach, who brings his nose in so it's almost touching mine.