Equimancer's Realm

  The Sage, who is neither male, nor female, for It is too busy discussing the issues of the World, and exchanging anything that can be traded, as long as it’s clean and healthy.

  Our Lord Preacher, without whom we wouldn’t be here today. He stands for faith and belief, and the desire to explore everything that’s around us.

  Our Lady Hermit. I know, most think she’s a dried up crone, but I beg to differ. She’s a tough one; putting us through hard lessons we all have to learn. Once done though, we come out strong and proud.

  Our oldest new God, the Jester. How can you not love him? He was sent by the Creator to Kronuria to lighten up Lady Hermit with his wit and insane ideas that have brought progress to the whole World.

  The Lady of the Ocean, born in Euposia, introducing a whole new level of mysticism and intoxication… but in a good way.

  And finally, the Dark Lady of the Underworld, who entered the Earth in Areshadia. Feared and misunderstood, for she is the bringer of death. But she’s also the Goddess of solace and new beginnings.”

  Zabarius counted on his fingers.

  “Have I left out any of them?”

  “No.”

  “You got them all.”

  “Well done.”

  “Good, good. Let’s say the Prayer of Equality and Equilibrium then.

  The Creator spoke to the Gods.

  ‘You shall love all your children equally.

  Whether man or woman.

  Whether rich or poor.

  Whether healthy or sick.

  Whether young or old.

  No matter what they believe.

  No matter what colour of eyes, hair or skin.

  No matter what or who they love.

  You shall love them all.’

  And the Gods replied.

  ‘We shall love them all equally,

  For now and eternity.’

  So be it.”

  “So be it,” echoed the crowd.

  “Right. We shall now continue our celebration by enjoying the gifts of the Gods. We will proceed to the Gardens of the Seasons. First, we will have a picnic in the Spring Gardens, which will be followed by a dip in the pools of the Summer Gardens. We shall endure the results of the attempts at making a decent beverage out of mage-weed during the mage-wine-tasting in the Autumn Gardens. Finally, we will all partake in the snow-related activities of the Winter Gardens. I will meet you all back here at quarter to midnight, when we will prepare for the Granting of The Blessing.

  Please try not to materialise on the same spot, let’s prevent any nasty injuries.”

  The podium lowered itself and Zabarius stepped off it with surprising agility.

  “That’s it?” Nessa turned to Gregorius.

  “Apparently. Tarilla told me it would be short.”

  “Yes, she told me as well. I just didn’t think it would be this painless. Can it be true that while my family get trampled up there, we will have picnics and wine-tastings?”

  “I was wondering myself, but Tarilla explained it to me. Equimancers are all about protecting the Structure and the Balance all their lives, which means that they practically honour the Creator and all the Gods every single day.

  So why wouldn’t they – or we – celebrate this day by enjoying the benefits? Besides, we are responsible for providing The Blessing.”

  “How?”

  “I don’t know. Tarilla said that we will know what to do.”

  ***

  When the five friends arrived at Archer Main Square, they noticed a commotion on the podium.

  When they got closer, they could make out the figure of Empress Saturnia of Ricornia – sibling of Sister Nocturnia,- arguing with a priest who was unfamiliar to all of them. Queen Mother Asnobia Mountainborn seemed to make attempts at holding her daughter back from physically attacking the robed man with a bushy moustache.

  “We’ll see about that!” Saturnia shouted at the man, and stormed down the stairs, straight towards them. Her mother hurried after her.

  When Saturnia noticed them, she stopped. Asnobia caught up with her.

  “Auntie, Cousin,” Sylvain kissed both women on the cheek.

  All the others bowed and kissed the Ladies’ hands.

  Except Trillian.

  “Saturnia darling. Asnobia dearest,” he said, planting noisy kisses on their faces.

  Octarian, Mordan, Wolly and Sylvain were lost for words at such a display of unexpected intimacy.

  “Sat, what’s wrong?” Trillian asked the Empress.

  “I’m begging you all; just listen to this false prophet’s sermon.

  Especially you, Trill. I’m sorry, I can’t talk right now. I need to find a place where I can explode in peace. After which I shall go to the Lazulian Emperor Thorwald and ask him what the Hell he’s playing at. Farewell, Princes. Come over as soon as possible, Trill,” she said and marched away.

  The Queen Mother smiled at them apologetically and ran after her, shouting.

  “You will do no such thing right now. We won’t do anything before having paid due homage to all the Gods.”

  The crowd swallowed them.

  “What the…?” was all Mordan could say.

  “I never noticed before, how much the Empress looks like her sister, Nocturnia,” Octarian remarked.

  “Saturnia darling? Asnobia dearest? When have you become the pet of the Mountainborns?” Wolly turned to Trillian.

  “I will definitely pay attention to the sermon after this,” Sylvain pledged.

  “Yeah, yeah, we all admire your attention span, but back to more important issues… Trill? Spill,” Wolly demanded.

  “What can I say? Saturnia has a fun side to her. A secret one,” Trillian laughed.

  “A fun side of the Angry Empress?” Octarian asked. Then again, he did experience the lighter side of a Mountainborn a while ago.

  “There’s nothing angry about her when we dive into the nightlife of the Island… or the Belly,” Trillian said with a mischievous grin.

  “The Belly? Get out of here!” Sylvain slapped Trillian with a force that almost made him fall over.

  The bell of the podium rang.

  “Let’s go. I admit, I’m mildly curious now,” said Octarian.

  They fought their way towards one of the front-row benches that were reserved for the Royals.

  Thirty minutes later Trillian jumped up.

  “I’m going to smash that git’s face, right now.”

  Octarian held him back.

  “I don’t think that you can do more than Empress Saturnia did.”

  “Trill’s right though; this is unbelievable,” Sylvain said, his face flushed with anger.

  “Let’s just all calm down,” Mordan suggested.

  “… and have a drink,” Wolly added.

  Trillian tore himself away from Octarian’s grip and stomped towards the nearest tavern.

  Once they were seated in The Crossbow, Wolly looked at Trillian and Sylvain.

  “I still don’t understand why you’re so upset. I admit; I glazed over a bit. What I got though, is that from this year on, there won’t be a separate sermon for the Creator. Which means seven sermons instead of eight. I would normally say ‘hurray,’ but by the looks on your faces, I fear you would thump me if I did.”

  “You don’t see anything wrong with that?” Sylvain glared at him. The blank expression on Wolly’s face gave him the answer.

  “I did notice that sometimes it wasn’t clear whether the new High Priest was talking about the Preacher or the Creator,” said Octarian.

  “Exactly. This alleged High Priest is apparently trying to do something the Eastern Euposians have started lately; proving that the Preacher is the Creator.

  This is bad. This is an attack on the Balance,” Sylvain slammed his palms on the table.

  “How on Earth do you know what the Eastern Euposians are up to?” Mordan asked in astonishment.

  “From the Royal Council meetings that I’ve been attending for months n
ow.

  “As in my brother Lexandros?” Octarian almost coughed his drink up.

  “Who are you and what have you done with Sylvain?” Wolly asked.

  “For fuck’s sake, stop being such idiots. I’ll be Emperor in half a year. It’s not a game; at least not for me. I’ll need to be prepared once I’m a member of the House of Houses. Fine, ask Trill what he thought.”

  Trillian was still seething in silence. When he noticed all of them looking at him, he started talking.

  “The Creator, both male and female, and neither male, nor female then split into two, the First Man and the First Woman. They joined and from their union the four Elements - Fire, Earth, Air and Water – were born,” he recited the part they all knew by heart in an otherworldly voice. He went on.

  “The Book of Gods itself teaches us, that life can only come from the union of man and woman. Only a union that can create life is blessed by the Creator… That’s what he said.”

  “He couldn’t have meant…” Octarian began.

  “I think he did. That’s exactly what they’re doing in Euposia. The men of their Archcleric are rounding up everybody who prefers their own gender. To teach them the ‘blessed way,’” Sylvain spat.

  “That’s ridiculous,” exclaimed Wolly.

  “And then, he said something along the lines of men being strong and determined, while women are the only ones capable of giving birth as an explanation of the Preacher-Creator’s assignment of tasks for the genders,” Trillian continued.

  “No wonder that Empress Saturnia was outraged. Can’t imagine her cooking a meal for her man who’s out hunting and gathering.”

  “He also seemed to imply that the Lady of the Ocean is some kind of made-up Goddess,” added Mordan.

  “Unlike all the other ones,” snorted Wolly.

  “What the Hell are you implying, you heathen?” Octarian cocked an eyebrow at him.

  “I do take offence to the term heathen, but you may call me agnostic.

  Let’s just take a look at our beloved deities.

  Father Sun and Mother Moon. Naturally, there’s nothing wrong with the values they stand for, but are you really supposed to see your Gods on a daily basis?

  The Warrior is a belligerent, competitive bully.

  The Lover is a nymphomaniac hermaphrodite.

  The Sage is an asexual hypochondriac.

  The Hermit is an asocial, old spinster.

  The Jester is an anarchic lunatic.

  The Lady of the Ocean is a narcomanic mermaid.

  The Lady of the Underworld is a sado-masochistic necromancer.

  And the Preacher is a philandering zealot, which makes him the most normal amongst this lot,” Wolly leant back and took a sip of his drink.

  “And this, boys and girls, was our esteemed Prince Wheatfield’s contribution to the holiest day of the year,” Octarian announced.

  “Hang on, hang on, I’m not dismissing them, and by the Gods, I would never doubt the existence of the Creator. Who could? After all; the Blessing is the most sacred thing for me. I’m just saying that all the Gods might be symbols and aspects that have been invented to make religion easier to digest for the masses,” Wolly concluded his speech.

  “You’ve spent too much time in Ermelia.”

  “You’re drunk.”

  “Heathen.”

  “You’re way too sober, have another drink.”

  ***

  “What are you doing?” Princess Ovine asked incredulously.

  “What does it look like, dear? I’m gettin’ dressed,” Nayos Meander, the Lord Mayor of Oxfield and the Governor of Gundia replied.

  “Where you going? I thought that you’d receive the Blessing with me. Here.”

  “Sorry dear, the Copperbrowns are expectin’ me for the Blessin’ in their palace,” he replied.

  Ovine pressed her hand in front of her mouth to stifle a scream.

  “I can’t believe that you haven’t broken you engagement to my cousin yet. To the daughter of a mere Duke… You promised me. I’m the future Empress of Gundia. I have already promised to make you the King of Gundia. What the Hell else do you want from me?” she started sobbing.

  “No offence, darlin,’ but I rather have a Duke’s daughter for sure than the promise of a possible Empress. Your mother might be alive for another few years, and ya know ‘s well ‘s I do that she would never let ya marry me,” Nayos shrugged as he buttoned up his shirt.

  “No, her Royal Council had convinced her to make me the Empress. It will happen within the next few weeks,” Ovine cried.

  “Congrats,” Nayos said as he put on his boot.

  “I’ll make you the Representative of Gundia, once I’m the Empress,” Ovine looked at him through her tears.

  “The Royal Council would never accept tha’.”

  “Watch me,” she said. Meander looked at her, and he knew she would get her way.

  ***

  At last, Nessa had succeeded to hit Gregorius right in the face with her snow-ball. He wagged his finger at her and gathered enough snow to get back at her, when there was a shout.

  “Equimancers of the Realm! It’s time now to do our duty. We shall meet at the Main Square in ten minutes.”

  Tarilla materialised next to Gregorius and slapped her palms together.

  Nessa suddenly felt anxious.

  “Elated Tarilla, what are we expected to do now?”

  She saw Gregorius taking aim, but then he let his perfectly formed snow-ball drop to the ground.

  “It’s a big responsibility, but it’s easy. Elated Zabarius will call out the Aptitudes that have to be aimed at the top of the Main Tower.

  Once your Apt is called out, you just channel it as well as you can.

  At the finale, we all channel whatever we have at the main spot, which will be directly above us. Come on, both of you, let’s portal there,” she instructed and was gone.

  “Come, take my hand, I’ll find us a spot to portal to,” Gregorius said to Nessa and offered her his hand.

  Nessa blushed.

  “Oh, for the Gods’ sake, you let me know involuntarily all the things you’d like to do with me. Holding hands is very innocent in comparison,” he grinned.

  “I hate you,” Nessa said.

  “Nah, you don’t,” he said and took her hand.

  The Main Square was packed with the Equimancers. They all came together, only once or twice in a year. Tens of thousands of them were gathered.

  “I’m really nervous now,” Nessa whispered to Gregorius.

  “I’m a virgin at this, just as you are. Not one in any other respect,” he winked at her.

  “Men,” Nessa rolled her eyes, but she didn’t have the chance to say anything else. Elated Zabarius took his place again at the floating disc.

  “My beloved ones. Prepare. Only a few seconds to go.

  As always; Fire first, Earth second, Air third, and then Water. Finally, all together, give it all you can… Five… Four… Three… Two… One… Fire!”

  Nessa knew it was her time, but she looked around. All Fire Apts looked up; she could see red rays being directed towards the Realm’s Central Tower. She concentrated, and as well as she could with her limited practice, she started to channel Fire towards the skies.

  For the fracture of a second Nessa could see the Structure flash in a brilliant red.

  “Earth!” Zabarius shouted. Nessa didn’t have anything to do at that moment. She looked at Gregorius.

  His eyes were sparkling. Unlike in the few hours that she had known him, he was serious now. Brilliant rays of yellow light hit the top of the Structure that turned golden.

  “Air!” The Structure became silver, and finally blue after Zabarius shouted;

  “Water!”

  The Elated clapped his hands.

  “Everyone!”

  Nessa gasped as the thousands and thousands of Equimancers channelled their Aptitudes. Rays of red, orange, pink, purple, green, white and shades of blue and y
ellow lit up the Main Square. It was the most beautiful sight she had ever experienced in her life.

  “Stop!” Zabarius shouted.

  The lights died off. There was silence for a few seconds.

  Then, the Structure flashed and enveloped everybody in divine white light.

  ***

  Octarian and his friends stood with thousands of other students on the grounds of the Academy, as closely to the Main Tower, as possible.

  “Any second now!”

  “Stop shoving!”

  “Concentrate!”

  “Shut up!”

  The students looked at the Structure with anticipation.

  “Here it comes! Five… Four… Three… Two… One… Aaaah!” one of them shouted.

  As the Structure flashed in red, Octarian could feel energy running through his whole body; all the tiredness of the day was gone, and he felt as if he could move mountains.

  When the yellow light hit him, he had the sensation that his whole body was buzzing. He felt rejuvenated.

  When the Structure exuded silvery rays, his spirit started soaring. He suddenly had insights and ideas; he thought he could change the World for the better.

  As soon as the blue light started shining on him, he felt tears of happiness welling up. When he thought that he was exploding with joy, the Structure darkened for a few seconds.

  Octarian took a deep breath and readied himself.

  Then, as if hit by lightning, he was enveloped in white light, along with everybody around himself.

  Every single fibre of his being was filled with euphoria.

  He felt love for everything and everybody.

  He knew he was part of the Creator’s Divine Plan.

  He felt one with the whole World, and he felt one with the Creator Itself.

  When the Blessing had ended, he felt uplifted, though rather shaky, as usual. People were wiping away their tears, they were hugging and kissing. The noise level was rising.

  “Anybody got tobacco?”

  “I need a drink.”

  “Let’s hit the town!”

  “Aaaah, this is better than…” Wolly was about to say.

  “Oi, can’t you keep your filthy thoughts to yourself for a few seconds?” Sylvain interrupted him.

  “What’s wrong with appreciating the Divine Orgasm?” Wolly grinned at him.

  “I wasn’t aware they changed the name from The Blessing,” Trillian sniggered.