The Peterkin Papers

  THE PETERKINS AT HOME. AT DINNER.

  ANOTHER little incident occurred in the Peterkin family. This was atdinner-time.

  They sat down to a dish of boiled ham. Now it was a peculiarity of thechildren of the family, that half of them liked fat, and half likedlean. Mr. Peterkin sat down to cut the ham. But the ham turned out tobe a very remarkable one. The fat and the lean came in separateslices,--first one of lean, than one of fat, then two slices of lean,and so on. Mr. Peterkin began as usual by helping the children first,according to their age. Now Agamemnon, who liked lean, got a fat slice;and Elizabeth Eliza, who preferred fat, had a lean slice. Solomon John,who could eat nothing but lean, was helped to fat, and so on. Nobody hadwhat he could eat.

  It was a rule of the Peterkin family, that no one should eat any of thevegetables without some of the meat; so now, although the children sawupon their plates apple-sauce and squash and tomato and sweet potato andsour potato, not one of them could eat a mouthful, because not one wassatisfied with the meat. Mr. and Mrs. Peterkin, however, liked both fatand lean, and were making a very good meal, when they looked up and sawthe children all sitting eating nothing, and looking dissatisfied intotheir plates.

  "What is the matter now?" said Mr. Peterkin.

  But the children were taught not to speak at table. Agamemnon, however,made a sign of disgust at his fat, and Elizabeth Eliza at her lean, andso on, and they presently discovered what was the difficulty.

  "What shall be done now?" said Mrs. Peterkin.

  They all sat and thought for a little while.

  At last said Mrs. Peterkin, rather uncertainly, "Suppose we ask the ladyfrom Philadelphia what is best to be done."

  But Mr. Peterkin said he didn't like to go to her for everything; letthe children try and eat their dinner as it was.

  And they all tried, but they couldn't. "Very well, then." said Mr.Peterkin, "let them go and ask the lady from Philadelphia."

  "All of us?" cried one of the little boys, in the excitement of themoment.

  "Yes," said Mrs. Peterkin, "only put on your india-rubber boots."And they hurried out of the house.

  The lady from Philadelphia was just going in to her dinner; but shekindly stopped in the entry to hear what the trouble was. Agamemnonand Elizabeth Eliza told her all the difficulty, and the lady fromPhiladelphia said, "But why don't you give the slices of fat to thosewho like the fat, and the slices of lean to those who like the lean?"

  They looked at one another. Agamemnon looked at Elizabeth Eliza, andSolomon John looked at the little boys. "Why didn't we think of that?"said they, and ran home to tell their mother.