Beauty From Love

  I don’t really know. My belly wasn’t huge the last time he was on top of me. If we had continued having sex throughout my pregnancy, I’m sure we would’ve adapted our positions as I grew. But we’re going from doing it while I had a near flat stomach to … this. “I don’t know except I can’t tolerate lying flat. It makes me lightheaded.” It’s been so long and I want this to be good for him. “I can get on my stomach—sort of. I mean, I can get on all fours.” I guess I should have just said rear entry—it’s the way he loves it best anyway.

  He slides his hand down my cheek. “No, I want to see your beautiful face while I make love to you.” He pats the bed. “Sit here for me.” He reaches up to the head of the bed to grab several pillows and places them behind me. “Lean back on these.”

  My feet are on the railing of the bed and I’m in a reclined sitting position. He puts his hands under my thighs and pushes my legs back. “Feel okay?”

  I’m already rocking my hips in anticipation. “Yeah.”

  His erection is rubbing against me and I anticipate him sliding inside at any moment, but he doesn’t. I wait some more. And he still doesn’t. “What’s wrong?”

  His eyes are squeezed shut as if he’s in pain. “I’m psyching myself up so I don’t come two strokes in.”

  “Not gonna happen. But if it does, we’ll keep doing it until you get it right.” He opens his eyes to look at me and I wink at him. “Go for it, tiger.”

  He eases into me and groans, “Fuck!” He pulls back and then thrusts slowly again, appearing as though he’s savoring the best moment of his life. “I can’t believe how tight you are.” He shakes with a rigor. “My God, it’s sending chills up my spine, it feels so good.” He pushes into me a few more times. “Is this good for you, babe?”

  “Mmm-hmm.”

  He moves his hand to where he’s moving in and out of me and strokes the sensitive spot above our union. “You like me thumbing your clit?”

  Is he kidding me? “Oh,yeah. Don’t stop.” He circles it fast and hard and then slow and soft. Just at the moment I think he’s going to alternate the strength and speed, he changes motions completely and rubs it back and forth, side to side. He’s stroking me on the outside with his fingers and the inside with his cock at the same time. He thought he would be the one to come fast, but it’s going to be me if he keeps this up. “I’m already getting close.”

  He’s moving faster now. “Do it. I want to feel your body quiver and contract around me because you’re coming hard.”

  I prop on my elbows because I want to watch Jack Henry moving in and out of me. Seeing what he’s doing and the look on his face jumpstarts the onset of those pre-orgasm sensations that will give life to the quivers low in my groin. I lean back and lift my hips, meeting him stroke for stroke. Then the first wave comes. “Ohh … Here it comes.” I clench my legs around him tight but he keeps moving when my insides squeeze around him.

  “L … ” That’s all he manages to get out and I know it’s because he’s in that place with me. I see it all over his face. Very little sets him off faster than hearing me say that he’s made me come. I think it’s because he loves knowing he’s the only man in this world holding the power to shatter me into a million magnificent pieces.

  He gives me a naughty little sideways grin and leans down to kiss one of my bent knees. “That was so fantastic.”

  I move the pillows behind me and scoot to the middle of the bed. “Come up here with me.” Since I can’t tolerate lying flat, I turn to my left side and he spoons behind me, wrapping his arm around my waist and rubbing my tummy.

  The baby is active, moving all over the place. “I do believe that stirred her up.”

  When I look down, I can see the waves of movement under my skin like a restless sea. “I’m going to miss this.”

  He pulls me close and kisses the back of my neck. “You won’t because she’ll be in your arms instead.”

  Nothing is holding this baby in now. “He or she could come any day.”

  “Are you sad you didn’t go into labor today?”

  Of course, I am. “Yeah, but mostly because it’s what I’d come to expect. Clip the stitch—a baby drops out. My cervix is incompetent, so why does it decide to suddenly become capable of holding this baby in?”

  “I don’t know. You’d need to ask the good doc that question.”

  “I am a little sad we aren’t in the hospital having a baby right now, but I’m happy we’re getting this special time together before it comes.”

  He snuggles behind me and I know where it’s leading. “I’m glad you feel that way because I’ll be ready to have some more of this special time together in a little while.”

  Greedy horn dog.

  It’s been three weeks since the cerclage was removed, making Laurelyn thirty-nine weeks—seven days from her due date. To say she’s disappointed that we haven’t had a baby is an understatement. She’s beyond miserable, tossing and turning all night because she’s so uncomfortable, and last night was no different. She finally dozed off from exhaustion around three. I did as well. But now it’s barely five and she’s restless again.

  “Mmm … ohh …” I hear her moaning as she tosses in bed. That’s a new sound.

  “You okay, L?”

  “Sss … ” I hear her sucking air through her teeth. “Ooh … ”

  I sit up to turn on the lamp and see her lying on her side with her legs pulled into a half-fetal position. “What’s happening, love? Are you in pain?”

  She’s covering her face with her hand. “Mmm-hmm. Bad.”

  My heart takes off in a sprint to race my stomach up to my throat. “Is it labor pains?”

  “I think so.”

  Shit. I’ve been preparing myself for this for months but I’m seeing there is no being prepared. “When did they start?”

  “About an hour ago.”

  An hour? How did I sleep through her being in pain for that long? “Why didn’t you wake me?”

  “I was waiting to see if they went away. I didn’t want to get you up if it was false labor.”

  Laurelyn’s selflessness can sometimes get her in trouble. “You have an incompetent cervix. Dr. Sommersby told you to not wait around if you thought you were in labor.”

  “Well, I don’t think it’s a good idea to wait any longer because the last couple of contractions were really bad.”

  I’m out of bed and at her side to help her up. “Will you help me change into my yoga pants and a T-shirt?”

  “Yeah. Where are they?”

  “Second drawer, right side of the dresser.”

  I dig through the drawer. “The black or gray ones?”

  “Black.” I shove the others back in, not caring if they’re neat or not.

  “Which top?”

  “The cream and silver striped V-neck.”

  I help her dress and then she goes into the bathroom to brush her teeth and fix her hair. When she finishes, she sticks her head out. “I’m going to use the bathroom and then we can go.”

  I’m sitting on the bed with her bag in my hand when she calls out for me. I open the door and she’s sitting on the commode, her legs pressed together. “I felt pressure like I needed to use the bathroom. When I sat down, I felt something pop.”

  She wrinkles her brow when we hear something dripping. She parts her legs to look. “That’s not pee—I guess my water broke. Whatever it is won’t stop coming out and I can’t control it.” Then it’s past time to go to the hospital. “Can you get a towel for me to put between my legs? It’s probably going to gush when I stand up.”

  She places it between her legs and stands. “Eew, it feels like I’m peeing on myself. Get some more towels for the car because I have a feeling this is gonna keep coming.”

  I don’t care about the car’s seat. “We can have it recovered.”

 
“It’s silly to ruin the leather by not protecting it with towels.”

  I reach into the cabinet and grab a handful. “Fine, let’s just go.”

  We get into the car and I notice her tensing and holding her breath every three or four minutes. “Just how much pain are you having?”

  “What? Like on a pain scale?” she asks.

  “Sure. One to five.”

  She grimaces and air hisses through her teeth. “Four and a half.”

  “What would classify as a five?” I probably don’t want to hear her answer.

  “My leg being sawed off without anesthesia.” Nope. Didn’t need to hear that.

  Shit. She’s going to be dilated a lot when we get to the hospital. That’s what Dr. Sommersby warned us about—a precipitous delivery. I looked it up when she used that word and it means the baby comes in under three hours from the onset of labor. She’s almost two hours into having painful contractions.

  There’s no way my family can make it in time, so we’re going to be alone when the baby gets here. “I should call my mum and tell her so she can be on her way.”

  “I’m getting admitted for sure since my water is broken, so I guess we can call people.”

  I dial my mum and she answers on the second ring. “Is it time?”

  “We’re on our way to the hospital now. She started hurting a couple hours ago and her water broke.”

  “I’m on my way.” I hear the excitement in her voice. “Tell our girl to not have that baby until I’m there. I’ve been present every time one of my grandchildren was born and I don’t intend on missing this one.”

  I don’t break it to my mum but I’m fairly certain she’ll miss this one. “I’ll tell her to squeeze her legs together until you’re here.”

  “Tell her I love her, and this baby is worth every bit of pain she’s feeling.”

  “I will. Love you, Mum.”

  I end the call, knowing there’s no need to phone the rest of my family because she’ll do it for us. “Do you want me to call Addison … or your parents?”

  She looks at the time. “It’s really early so I hate to disturb Addie and the baby if they’re sleeping. Let’s wait until a little later since she’ll depend on Zac’s mom to watch Donavon when she comes.”

  It’s a sore subject but I have to ask. “And what about your parents?”

  “I want Nanna and Pops to know, so I guess you can call them. But tell her I can’t talk if she asks for me.”

  I dial L’s mum and it goes straight to voicemail. “Hi, Jolie. This is Jack Henry and I was calling to let you know Laurelyn is in labor and we’re on our way to the hospital so please give me a call when you get this message.” I hang up and glance at Laurelyn.

  “My parents have very little place in my life now, and that’s fine. I’m okay with it because the McLachlans are all I need. I reconciled with that reality a while ago.”

  “You’re one of us now and always will be.” I reach over and spread my palm over her stomach. “And this one too.” Her abdomen becomes rock hard beneath my hand and she grabs the edge of her seat, panting. “Whoa! Is that a contraction?”

  She doesn’t answer but breathes in and out until her abdomen softens. “Yes.”

  “Wow, that was really hard.”

  “You think you’re telling me something I don’t know?” she asks.

  “I guess I’m just surprised. I thought you’d have an epidural by the time it got this bad.”

  “I wish. It feels like it’s in overdrive now.”

  “We’re almost there, babe.”

  Laurelyn is taken to an observation room where a nurse comes in to check her. It’s the same routine as always—glove on, hand disappears under the covers. “I’d call you every bit of six, almost seven centimeters, so we need to get you admitted to a labor room as soon as possible. Are you planning on an epidural?”

  She looks at me questioningly. “Don’t look at me. I’m not the one hurting.”

  “It would be different if I was one centimeter and was going to be in this kind of pain for hours, but I’m almost seven. I only have three more centimeters to go. I’m just wondering if I really need an epidural because I think I can do it without one.”

  “It’s up to you, Mrs. McLachlan, but be forewarned that when the baby comes, there’s going to be a lot of pressure and burning.”

  “I wish your mom were here. I don’t know what to do.” I wish my mum were here too.

  “We can’t get an epidural placed until you’re moved and have an IV anyway, so think about it while we work on those things.”

  That sounds reasonable. “Okay.”

  The nurse promises to return shortly to move Laurelyn to her room. When she’s gone, I see how torn she is. “You are tough and I know you can do it without the epidural, but I hate seeing you hurt when you don’t have to.”

  “It’s childbirth—a natural process women have been doing for a bazillion years without anesthesia.” I know, but those other women aren’t my wife and it kills me to see her in pain. “It’s a good kind of pain—one I think I can tolerate.”

  I’m afraid it’ll come to a point where she’ll change her mind and want an epidural but there’s no going back. “Pain is pain.”

  “I can do this.”

  She seems so confident. “It’s your body and you’re the one who’s hurting—it’s your decision.”

  Amy, the nurse we saw when the cerclage was removed, returns and L is moved to a room like the one we occupied for a week when we were in danger of losing Maggie James. She does her admission work while a second nurse starts an IV and a third sets up the room. Amy comes to the part about L’s birth plan, and L announces her decision.

  “I’ve decided I’m gonna do this natural.”

  I groan inwardly because I don’t want to watch my girl hurt. I hope I don’t freak out if she starts screaming. I look at the time and see that my mum is probably still three hours away. I wish I’d called her as soon as L told me she was having pain. I really need her to be here to calm me. “I’m going to step out and call my mum. She’ll want an update.”

  “Okay.”

  I stop at the nurses’ desk and catch Amy’s attention. “I wanted to let you know I’m stepping to the waiting room to make a call in case you need me.”

  “No problem. I’ll come out and get you if anything happens.”

  I phone my mum and she’s quick to answer. “What’s going on?”

  “Laurelyn’s almost seven centimeters.”

  “Oh, dear. I won’t make it in time for delivery.”

  I’m certain the incompetent cervix is why she’s progressing so quickly. “Her doctor warned us this could happen, but I’m worried because she’s decided to go natural.”

  “Why are you worried about that?” she asks.

  “I don’t want her in pain.”

  I can hear my mum laughing at me. “Newsflash, Jack Henry. Childbirth hurts. I’m sure Laurelyn knew that when she made the decision to not get an epidural. She knows her body and what she can handle. She’ll be fine, son.” I won’t be convinced of that until I see a baby in her arms. “I’m sure you snuck away to make this call, so get your arse back in there with your wife since she shouldn’t be alone. I expect to be there around ten, but do call if anything happens before then.”

  When I hang up with Mum, I don’t have the feeling of relief I was hoping for. I have no one I can talk to … except maybe my brother. He’s been in my shoes and done this three times, so I dial his number. It’s early but he should be awake.

  It takes several rings before he answers. “What!”

  What an impolite dick my brother can be. “What the fuck, Evan? Why you being so damn rude?”

  “Because you just interrupted my morning lay.” Okay. I’ll let him off the hook this time. “Em made me stop to answer
the phone because she wants to know if you’re calling to tell us Laurelyn’s in labor.”

  “She is, but I need to talk to about something.”

  I hear him growl. “What’s going on?”

  “She’s not getting an epidural and I’m sort of freaking out about seeing her in pain.”

  “For fuck’s sake, she’s giving birth. It’s going to hurt. Em didn’t have epidurals with the last two and she was fine, so quit your whining, puss, and get back in the room with your wife. She shouldn’t be by herself, dipshit. Don’t you know anything?”

  Apparently not, but he’s right. I’ve left my wife alone while I’m out here making phone calls to get myself some assurance when she’s the one in need of comforting. “You’re right.”

  L is breathing harder when I return to the room. “They checked me and said I was almost nine centimeters so this baby is coming super fast. They said I’ll probably be ready to push soon.”

  “Then maybe we should consider naming her Maggie Swift instead.”

  “The moment is almost here. We’re about to meet our son or daughter. I’m so glad we didn’t find out. Thank you for being persistent about that.” She reaches for my hand and squeezes, her teeth clenched. I watch the monitor as the line representing the contraction rises. “Ohh … this one hurts really bad, McLachlan! I can feel it all the way down … in my butt!”

  That doesn’t sound good. “What does that mean?”

  “Baby’s moving down.” She rolls to hold the railing so I can’t see her face. “Oh, shit! Call Amy. Feels like I … need to push.”

  She grunts as I reach over to hit the call button. “May I help you?”

  “Laurelyn says she feels like she needs to push.”

  Amy comes into the room and gloves up for her exam. “I bet you’re ready if you’re feeling the urge.” Her hand slips under the covers and Laurelyn squeezes her eyes tightly. “Boy, that was fast. She’s ten, so it’s time to start pushing. I’ll let Dr. Sommersby know because the head is low. I don’t think it’ll take long at all so she won’t want to be far away, especially since you’re going natural. Once you crown the baby’s head, it’s nearly impossible to stop.”