Ogre, Ogre

  "No joy?" Tandy asked, bewildered. "Smash tied the dragon. We can go on now. That's wonderful!"

  "That's nothing," the Siren said. "I will end it all." And she stepped off the ledge.

  Tandy screamed. Smash leaped to catch the Siren. Fortunately, she was coming right toward him; all he had to do was intercept her fall and swing her about and set her safely on her feet.

  "She tried to kill herself!" Tandy cried, appalled.

  Something was definitely wrong. Smash looked up at the pining tree. The other three sat drooping, like the tree itself.

  Then he caught on. "The pining tree! It makes people pine!"

  "Oh, no!" Tandy lamented. "They've been there too long, getting sadder and sadder. Now they're suicidal!"

  "We must get them down from there," Smash said.

  The Siren stirred. "Oh, my--I was so sad!"

  "You were near the pining tree," Tandy informed her. "We didn't realize what it did."

  The Siren mopped up her tear-stained face. "So that was it! That's a crying shame."

  "I'll climb up and carry them down," Smash said.

  "Then you'll get sad," Tandy said. "We don't need a suicidal ogre failing on our heads."

  "It does take a while for full effect," the Siren said. "The longer I sat, the sadder I got. It didn't strike all at once."

  "That's our answer," Tandy said. "I'll go up and push people off the ledge, and Smash can catch them. Quickly, before I get too sad myself."

  "What about Chem?" the Siren asked. "She's too heavy for Smash to catch safely."

  "We'll have to lower her on the rope."

  They decided to try it. Tandy climbed the rope, picked up the weeping John, and threw her down. Smash caught the fairy with one hand, avoiding contact with her delicate wings. Then Tandy pushed Fireoak off the ledge. Finally she tied the end of the rope about the centaur's waist, passed the rope behind the tree, and forced her to back down while Smash played out the other end of the rope gradually. It was slow, but it worked.

  Except for one thing. Tandy remained beside the tree, since the rope was now taken up by the centaur, and the tree was getting to her. She wandered precariously near the edge, her tears flowing. Then she stepped off.

  If Smash moved to catch her, he would let Chem fall. If he did not--

  He figured it out physically before solving it mentally. He held the rope in his right hand while jumping and reaching out with his left hand. He caught Tandy by her small waist and drew her in to his furry body without letting Chem slip.

  Tandy buried her face in his pelt and cried with abandon. He knew it was only the effect of the pining tree, but he felt sorry for her misery. All he could do was hold her.

  "That was a nice maneuver, Smash," the Siren said, coming up to take the girl from his arm.

  "I couldn't let her fall," he said gruffly.

  "Of course you couldn't." But the Siren seemed thoughtful. It was as if she understood something he didn't.

  Now they were all down and safe--but unfortunately at the bottom of the Gap Chasm. The Gap Dragon was still twitching, trying to discover a way to free itself without pulling out either its brains or its tail. Which was more important wasn't clear.

  John revived. "Oh, my, that was awful!" she exclaimed. "Now I feel so much better, I could just fly!" And she took off, flying in a loop.

  "Well, she can get out of the chasm," the Siren said.

  Smash looked at the fairy, and at the dragon, and at the pining tree. There was a small ironwood tree splitting the difference between the pining tree and the top of the cliff wall. He had an idea. "John, can you fly to the top of the chasm carrying the rope?"

  The fairy looked at the rope. "Way too heavy for me."

  "Could you catch it and hold it if I hurl the end up to you?"

  She inspected it again. "Maybe, if I had something to anchor me," she said doubtfully. "I'm not very strong."

  "That ironwood tree."

  "I could try."

  Smash tied an end of the rope to a rock, then hurled the rock up past the ironwood tree. John flew up and held the rope at the tree. Now Smash walked over to the Gap Dragon, which was still trying to free itself from the boulder without hurting its head or its tail in the process. Smash knocked it on the head with a fist, and it quieted down; the dragon was no longer in fighting condition and couldn't roll with the punch.

  Smash untied the tail, disconnected it from the boulder, unthreaded the head, and tied the tip of the tail to the nether end of the rope. Then he dragged the inert dragon to the base of the chasm wall and placed its tail so that it reached well up toward the top.

  "Now drop that stone." he called.

  The fairy did so. The rock pulled the slack rope up and around the ironwood trunk. When it began to draw on the dragon's tail, the weight of the rope wasn't enough. The fairy flew down and sat on the rock, adding weight, and it dropped down farther. Finally Smash was able to jump and catch hold of it.

  John flew back to the ground while Smash hauled the dragon up by the tail. But soon the weight was too much; instead of hauling the dragon up. Smash found himself dangling. This was a matter of mass, not strength.

  "We can solve that," Chem said, shaking off her remaining melancholy. She had received a worse dose of pining than the others, perhaps because of her size and because she had been closest to the tree. "Use the boulder for ballast."

  Smash rolled the boulder over. He hooked a toe in the hole he had punched in it, then drew on the rope again. This anchorage enabled him to drag the dragon farther up the slope. When it got to the point where both ogre and boulder were dangling in the air, Chem added her considerable weight to the effort by balancing on the boulder and clinging to Smash. "I'll bet you've never been hugged like this before," she remarked.

  Smash pondered that while he hauled on the rope, trying to get the dragon up. Actually, he had embraced his friend Chet, her older brother, and Arnolde the Archivist, the middle-aged centaur who was now in charge of liaisons with Mundania. But those had been males, and his recent company had attuned him somewhat more to the difference of females. Chem was not of his species, of course, but she was clinging to him with extraordinary constriction because it was hard for her human arms to support her equine body. She was pleasant to be close to; her present hug was almost like that of an ogress.

  All these girls were pleasant to be close to, he realized as the Eye Queue curse enabled him to think the matter through. Each had her separate female fashion, sort of rounded and soft, structured for holding. But it seemed best not to let them know that he noticed. They allowed themselves to get close to him only because they regarded him as a woolly monster who had no perception of their non-edible attributes.

  He hauled on the rope, bringing the dragon up another notch. Now Smash was approaching the limit of his strength, for the dragon was a heavy monster and there was a long way to haul. When the job got near the end, ogre, boulder, and centaur were all getting light; any more and they would be swinging in the air.

  But at last it was done. Now the Gap Dragon was suspended by its tail from the ironwood tree, its snout just touching the level ground at the base of the chasm. Smash climbed the rope to the tree, caught the trailing tip of the dragon's tail, and knotted it about the tree. Then, clinging to the tree, he untied the rope and flung it upward over the tip of the cliff. He had had the foresight to leave Chem and the boulder anchoring the rope at ground level before doing this.

  John flew up and caught the rope. She dragged the end to a tree beyond the chasm and tied it firmly with a fairy knot. Smash climbed the rest of the way up and stood at last on the northern side of the Gap Chasm. Now they had their escape route.

  "Climb the dragon, climb the rope," he called down. His voice echo-boomed back and forth across the chasm, but finally settled down to the bottom, where they could hear it.

  Tandy came up, placing her feet carefully against the dragon's metal scales, which tended to fold outward because of its inverted positi
on, making the footing better. The Siren followed, not quite as agile.

  Chem and Fireoak were more of a problem. The centaur had let herself down readily enough, but lacked the muscle either to climb the dragon vertically or to haul herself up along the rope to the top. And the hamadryad was too weak even to make the attempt.

  Smash could handle that. He slid down the rope and dragon, picked up the dryad, and carried her to the top. Then he returned for the centaur. He had her hold on to him again, circling her arms about his waist while he hauled himself up by hands and feet. Progress was slow, for her hooves could not grip the dragon's scales comfortably, but eventually they made it to the ironwood tree.

  At this point the nature of the problem changed. The rope went straight up to the overhanging lip, and Smash doubted Chem could hold on to him while he climbed that. Also, he was tiring, and might be unable to haul himself and her up, using only his arms. So he parked her, wedged between the ironwood trunk and the cliff, while he rested and considered.

  But he was not provided much time for either. The Gap Dragon, quiescent until now, stirred. It was a tough animal, and even a punch in the head by the fist of an ogre could not put it to sleep indefinitely. It twisted about, trying to discover what was happening.

  "I think you had better climb back up your rope now," Chem said.

  "Tie the end about your waist; I will draw you up from above."

  "I will make a harness," she decided. She looped the rope around her body in various places. "This way I can defend myself."

  Smash clambered up the taut rope while the dragon thrashed about with increasing vigor. As Smash crossed the cliff lip, he saw the dragon's head mining back up along its body, toward the centaur filly. That could certainly be trouble!

  Atop the cliff, Smash took hold of the rope and drew it up. The weight was great, but the rope was magically strong. He had to brace carefully, lest he be pulled back over the cliff. Again he was reminded that strength alone was not sufficient; anchorage was at times more important. He solved the problem by looping the rope about his own waist so that he could not be drawn away from the tree and could exert his full force.

  John was hovering near the lip. "That dragon has spotted Chem," she announced with alarm. "It's reaching up. I don't know whether it can..."

  Smash kept on hauling. He could go only so fast, since he had to take a fresh grip each time and tense for the renewed effort. He hated to admit it, even to himself, but he was tiring more rapidly. What had become of his ogre endurance?

  "Yes, the dragon can reach her," John reported. "It's lunging, snapping. She's fending it off neatly with her hooves, but she's swinging around without much leverage. She can't really hurt it. It's trying again--you'd better lift her up higher, Smash!"

  Smash was trying, but now his best efforts yielded only small, slow gains. His giant ogre muscles were solidifying with fatigue.

  "Now the dragon is trying to climb its own tail, to get higher, so it can chomp the rope apart or something," the fairy said. "This time she won't be able to stop it. Pull her up quickly!"

  But try as he might, Smash could not. The rope began to slip through his exhausted hands.

  The Siren leaped up. "I have a knife!" she cried. "I'll go down and cut off the dragon's tail so it will drop to the bottom of the chasm, out of reach!"

  "No!" Tandy protested. "You'll have no way to get up again!"

  "I'll do it!" John said. "Quick--give me the knife!"

  The Siren gave her the knife. The fairy dropped out of sight beyond the ledge. Smash tried to rouse himself to resume hauling on the rope, but his body was frozen into a deathlike rigor. He could only listen.

  The Siren lay on the bank, her head over the cliff, looking down. "The dragon's head is almost there," she reported. "John is down near the tree. She's afraid of that monster; I can tell by the way she skirts it. But she's approaching the tied tail. Now she's sawing on it with the knife. She's not very strong, and those scales are tough. The dragon doesn't see her; it's orienting on Chem. Oops--now it sees John. That knife is beginning to hurt it as she digs through the scales. It's slow work! The dragon is turning its head about, opening its jaws. Chem is slipping down farther. She's kicking at the dragon's neck with her forefeet, trying to distract it. Now she's throwing dirt at it from the chasm wall. John is still sawing at the tail. I think she's down to real flesh now. The dragon is really angry. It's blasting out steam--Oh!" She paused, horrified.

  "What happened?" Tandy demanded, her face pale with strain.

  "The steam--John--" The Siren took a ragged breath. "The steam shriveled her wings, both of them. They're just tatters. John's clinging to the tree trunk. Still sawing at the tail. What awful courage she has! She must be in excruciating pain."

  The fairy had lost her newly recovered wings and was suffering terribly--because of Smash's failure. In an agony of remorse, he forced strength through his frozen muscles and hauled again on the rope. Now it came up, its burden seeming lighter, and soon the centaur was over the lip of the chasm and scrambling to safety. But what of John?

  "There goes the dragon!" the Siren cried. "She did it! She cut through the tail! There's dragon blood all over her and she's lost the knife, but the dragon's bouncing down the slope in a cloud of dust and steam. Now the monster's rolling at the base. It's galumphing away!"

  "What of John?" Tandy cried.

  "She's sitting there by the ironwood tree. Her eyes are closed. I don't think she quite comprehends what has happened. Her wings--"

  Tandy was fashioning the rope into a smaller harness. "Lower this to her. We'll draw her up!"

  Smash merely stood where he was, listening. His brief surge of strength had been exhausted; now he could do nothing. He felt ashamed for his weakness and the horrible consequence of it, but had no further resource. John had thought she would be safe in the company of an ogre!

  Chem drew the fairy up. Smash saw John huddled in the harness. Her once-lovely wings, with the blossoming flower patterns, were now melted amorphous husks, useless for flying. Would they ever grow back? It seemed unlikely.

  "Well, we crossed the chasm," Tandy said. She was not happy. None of them was. One of their number had lost her invaluable wings, another was too wasted to stand, and Smash was too tired to move. If this was typical of the hazards they faced, traversing central Xanth, how would they ever make it the rest of the way?

  "Well, now," a new voice declared. Smash turned his head dully to view the speaker. It was a gnarled, ugly goblin--at the head of a fair-sized troop of goblins.

  Goblins hated people of any type. The strait had become yet more dire.

  Chapter 7

  Lunatic Fringe

  If you fight, we'll shove you all over the brink without your rope," the goblin leader said. He was a stunted black creature about John's height, with a huge head, hands, and feet. His short limbs seemed twisted, as if the bones had been broken and reset many times, and his face was similarly uneven, with one eye squinting, the other round, the nose bulbous, and the mouth crooked. By goblin standards, he was handsome.

  The goblins spread out to surround the party. They peered at the ogre, centaur, hamadryad, fairy, siren, and girl as if all were supreme curiosities. "You crossed the Gap?" the leader asked.

  Tandy took it upon herself to answer. "What right have you to question us? I know your kind from the caves. You don't have any useful business with civilized folk."

  The leader considered her. "Whom do you know in the caves, girl-thing?"

  "Everybody who is anybody," she retorted. "The demons, the Diggle-worm, the Brain Coral--"

  The leader seemed fazed. "Who are you?"

  "I am Tandy, daughter of Crombie the Soldier and Jewel the Nymph. You know who sets out those black opals you goblins steal to give to your goblin girls! My mother, that's who. Without her there wouldn't be any gems of any kind to find anywhere."

  There was a muttering commotion. "You have adequate connections," the goblin leader grudged. "Ve
ry well, we won't eat you. You may go, girl-thing."

  "What of my friends?" Tandy asked suspiciously.

  "They have no such connections. Their mothers don't plant gems in the rocks. We'll cook them tonight."

  "Oh, no, you won't! My friends go with me!"

  "If that's the way you want it," the goblin said indifferently.

  "That's the way I want it."

  "Come this way, then. You'll all go in the pot together."

  "That's not what I meant!" Tandy cried.

  "It isn't?" The goblin seemed surprised. "You said you wanted to be with your friends."

  "But not in the pot!"

  The goblin shook his head in confusion. "Females change their minds a lot. Exactly what do you want?"

  "I want us all to continue our trip north through Xanth," Tandy said, enunciating clearly. "I can't do it alone. I don't know anything about surface Xanth. I need the ogre to protect me. If he weren't worn out from fighting the Gap Dragon and hauling us all up out of the Gap, he'd be cramming all of you into the pot!"

  "Nonsense. Ogres don't use pots."

  Tandy huffed herself up into the resemblance of a tantrum. But before she completed the process, a goblin lieutenant sidled up to whisper in the leader's ear. The leader nodded. "Maybe so," he agreed. He turned back to Tandy. "You are five females, guarded by the tired ogre?"

  "Yes," Tandy agreed guardedly.

  "How many others has he eaten?"

  "None!" Tandy responded indignantly. "He doesn't eat friends!"

  "He can't be much of an ogre, then."

  "He beat up the Gap Dragon!"

  The goblin considered. "There is that." He came to a decision. "My name is Gorbage Goblin. I control this section of the Rim. But I have a daughter, and we are exogamous."

  "What?" Tandy asked, bewildered.

  "Exogamous, twit. Girls must marry outside their home tribes. But there is no contiguous goblin tribe; we are apart from the main nation of goblins. The dragons extended their territory recently, cutting us off." He scowled. "The other goblins keep forgetting us, the slugbrains. I don't know why."