Zombie Grind

a median in the middle of it. I didn’t much give a shit. I knew we weren’t heading outta this hell-hole and at least a little sight-seeing would keep me away from the lab coats who, by now, were really starting to creep me the fuck out way more than any mudhead or Red Eye I ever come in contact with.

  We come up on what musta been a pretty nice hotel back when but now it was just mostly like everything else. Fucked up. All the first floor windows were busted and a course the doors were knocked down, but the sign was still anchored to the roof even though it looked like somebody had took an assault rifle to most a it.

  I could hear Scar talking in a loud voice somewhere toward the front a the line but I didn’t pay no attention. Then we came to a stop for a minute, I guess to soak up his bullshit, and then we were moving again, from the looks of it where I was, into the hotel.

  I found out real quick that it wasn’t a hotel any more. The sign out front shoulda been changed to Dorm because everything worth a shit had long since been lifted. The rooms now were simply four walls and a cot, and when we filed into em (mine was on the fourth floor, there was so goddamn many a us) the doors were locked from the outside. Now, ain’t no doubt the Liv-ers who put us there knew damn well no locked door was gonna hold any a us for long, but I know I didn’t touch that sonofabitch. It was a warning and even a dumb fucking zombie like me could read the particulars on that one.

  Leave the room and become a burnt end.

  A simple lesson for simple fuckers.

  I got it just fine.

  I turned away from the door back toward the room itself. The bathroom was wreaked but I didn’t need it anyway. It stunk like shit in there and I saw somebody had left some rotten nastiness in the tub. Maybe that was supposed to be my late-night snack. As for the rest a the room, like I said, there was a cot. Looked like a army-issue piece a shit with a thin mattress that coulda split time as a piece a plywood. Oh yeah, there was a clothes rack. Matter a fact there were two. One had another uniform on it like the one I had on and the other was what I guessed to be my Sunday duds. Hell, around here I wasn’t sure. Maybe they were gonna make us start goin to church. It wouldna surprised me none.

  I walked over and sat down on the cot until I heard some fucker messing around with the lock outside just about the time the sun came up. I put on the uniform and went into the hall to join the others.

  We fell into a sorta routine after that. The days were filled with a lot of the same ole same ole. Mostly standing around listening to all the garbled nonsense the lab coats were so free in sharing. And a course the weekly Burnings. I don’t know where they found all those poor fuckers but there wasn’t any shortage of em, I’ll tell you that. I got to know that hotel room like the back a my hand. And in the back a my mind there was always the urge to run, to get the fuck outta this hell and back to the Outside, even though the chances of that happening got slimmer and slimmer. The lab coats kept as close a watch over the lot of us as a Baptist preacher over his only daughter. It was as if at the End of It All I’d up and joined the fucking army.

  Black days for sure.

  But there were some differences. Like the blood tests. Every coupla days I’d get brought back to the room with the chair bolted to the floor and after they’d strapped me in tight (they did this every time there were men in the room) they’d give me a poke and take my blood. I noticed it had turned black and kinda sluggy and just thinking that this shit was coming outta me made me a little sick. I took to turning away while they did it, trying to think a something else. Also, Lady Lab Coat was mysteriously absent after that first Burning. It got me to wondering and watching out for her but nothing. It even got me thinking after a while that maybe I’d made her up completely.

  That, however, turned out to be total bullshit. She was still around and I found that out one morning during what I came to think of as my routine physical. The day was like every other. Sitting around in the hotel room until the door was unlocked and we filed out into the hall and then down to the plaza. Some of the Red Eyes going this way and the others that. I tended to go wherever the flow took me and nine times outta ten there were lab coats directing traffic. That day, I got picked like an apple from a tree and wasn’t long before I was back in that room with the bolted-down chair. Two male lab coats strapped me down (but only my arms this time, leaving my legs free) and went about taking my blood and talking amongst themselves like I wasn’t really there. Didn’t make shit for difference to me; I hated em all. And realizing this made something else hard to figure. Why the hell didn’t I just tear these motherfuckers to pieces? I coulda done it countless times but so far nothing. And this from a Red Eye that’d already done a fair piece a killing and maiming. But now I wasn’t like that. I just felt wore out, lazy. The only time I really got my blood up was when we headed out to the Burning and I fell into hacking on mudheads on the way. Actually kinda normal now to my way a thinking. But after the hacking was done and the Burning started it was like I was dialed to zero. That’s how it was that day. I just sat there like a house cat, not really interested in anything.

  According to whatever schedule the lab coats had, they finished up with me, said a few words to each other, and without even a look in my direction went over to the door and left. I just sat there in a half-snooze watching the door. It was like my mind was a black curtain they slid down.

  After a while, hell it coulda been mosta the day, I heard footsteps approaching and the door came open. It was Lady Lab Coat, same as I remembered with that little smirky smile on her face, but today she was different. At least as far as dress went. This time she had on a long black robe that went all the way down to the floor. And strangely I noticed she didn’t have any shoes or socks on. Her toenails were painted blood red.

  I looked into her eyes as she came on. She closed the door and walked over to the desk. Opened that same drawer and took out the syringe case. I knew what was coming as she filled it. When she was finished she looked at it and then at me. “Okay,” she said and came out from around the desk to the chair that was facing me. She sat down. The male lab coats had taken off my shirt when I entered the room, which was a little outta sorts, and with my arms strapped down to the chair, it made it easier for her to get the needle in. I sat there and took it as usual.

  Then she sat back and put her hands in her lap. That knowing little grin grew on her face and she brushed her hair back. Looked me dead in the eye. “How’s my trooper?” she said. I just shrugged my shoulders like I did every time. But then I realized I could understand her completely. It had been creeping up for some time but it wasn’t now like she was speaking a foreign language or anything. I knew what she was saying.

  She leaned forward and the robe kinda fell away, revealing her milky-white breasts underneath the robe. She obviously didn’t have a shirt on. But before I could take this wonder any further she began to talk again. “I know you must have many questions,” she began. “I’ve had my eye on you since you arrived and I know by now you must understand me completely.” I made like I didn’t for reasons unknown. “We know you’re different from the others, even the devils,” she said and I took that to mean the Red Eyes. “You hide it well, perhaps you don’t even know you’re doing so, but we do. The tests we’ve run on you are proof positive. You are a hybrid, a cross between these…zombies and us.” I took this to mean her. “Today I’m going to let you in on a secret. I’ve told you I work with the NWO and most people associate that with the mysterious New World Order. We had our plaques and our clues before the Change and of course there have been countless conspiracies assigned to our organization. And many weren’t really that far from the truth. What’s in a name, people ask? Well, in our case everything. The world just took the bait that we laid down for it. There is no New World Order.

  “We are the Nihilist World Order.

  “We always have been. And all the popes and bishops and politicians and world leaders never even knew. At least the ones not involved in our organization. And there have been many.
It has taken years but we eventually got the right people in the right places. Biological labs, missile defense, pharmaceutical companies. We waited and we plotted and we finally set our real plan into motion. Or at least Part One. You’re the end of Part One and just to let you know, this plan only has two parts. And Part Two is fast approaching. We even fed the rumor of the 500 million, that that was the target of the New World Order. That that was sustainable for the planet.

  “But here’s the truth. We don’t give a fuck about this planet. And that last number’s a little high. The Nihilist World Order has a different number in mind and that number is zero. Nil. None. We deal in wholesale death and so far our plans have far outdistanced our craziest goals. But there have also been some incredible surprises. Surprises like you. You see, no one suspected that the zombie pharmocophagi would actually create different kinds of zombies. We figured on one type but you have provided tangible proof that there are at least three. The Standards and then the Devils and now, you. It’s a very interesting development.

  “As a matter of fact, I’ve been charged with a new task. That is the real reason I’m here