Everything Changes

  Stacey I am nervous. How am I going to spend a hole month here??? I brought a few books with me, my pastells and paints, a drawing pad, some suplise for making jewlry. Thats it. Mom and Dad and Janine are all happy, talking about the fresh sea air and having time to read or cook or think or whatever. I need a little excitement.

  Hmm. Maybe I’ll go start a fight over what to listan to on the radio. Then I’ll ask if we can have lobser for dinner.

  Are you doing all those things I asked you to do? Day dreaming about them may be the most exitment I have here all month.

  Love,

  Claudia

  Tuesday

  Dear Claud,

  I got your letter today. Freeport sounds like a lot of fun. I wish my mom or dad would take me on a shopping vacation. I guess you’re on Monhegan now. How is it? Do you have a phone? Like I said in my last letter, I bet you don’t. How are you coping without it? What are you doing all day long?

  Okay, just in case you’re suffering from excitement withdrawal, I wanted to let you know that I have begun going to the places you listed in your letter. I started with Bloomingdale’s. Ethan and I went on Sunday. As you can imagine, it was not Ethan’s idea of a fun and masculine way to spend part of his weekend, but he said he really wanted to be with me.

  I wasn’t sure this was such a good idea.

  “You’re going to be bored,” I told him.

  “No I won’t,” he replied.

  “You were bored the last time we went there. You were so bored you tried on hats in the women’s department and embarrassed me.”

  “I promise I won’t do that again. I promise.”

  “Will you bring along something to entertain yourself with?”

  “A book. I’ll bring a book. And I’ll just sit on those couches they provide for bored men. I’ll move from Guy Couch to Guy Couch in the store while you try stuff on. Maybe I’ll meet some other bored guys and we can talk…. What are you going to buy?”

  “I don’t know. I just want to look.”

  “How can you do that? Go to a store and just look? I never go shopping unless I need something.”

  This must be one of the great differences between men and women.

  Anyway, we got to Bloomie’s early in the afternoon and headed for the shoe department. Ethan had stuck a copy of Of Mice and Men in his back pocket. I saw a nice pair of sandals I wanted to try on so I said, “Ethan, I’m going to ask a salesperson if they have these in my size. You go read your book, okay?”

  Ethan looked around. He didn’t see one of the Guy Couches, only the shoe-trying-on seats. And he wouldn’t sit on them because we were in the women’s department.

  “People will think I’m waiting to try on a pair of pumps,” he said.

  “You didn’t care what people thought when you were trying on women’s hats.”

  “I was in a different mood then.”

  This did not bode well and I knew it. But I made him sit down and read while I tried on the sandals anyway.

  The accessories department was better because a Guy Couch was situated just across the aisle from it. Ethan read — and I bought you a present, Claud! I’ll give it to you when we get back to Stoneybrook. It’ll be something for you to look forward to this month.

  Ethan also managed to find a Guy Couch and read while I tried on bathing suits. But things fell apart entirely when I stepped into the lingerie department.

  “There is NO COUCH here,” Ethan said in this incredibly loud whisper, “and I AM NOT going to stand anywhere near all these … these …”

  “Bras?” I said brightly. I smiled at him.

  “SHHHHHH!”

  “Okay. Go back to the accessories couch. I’ll meet you there in ten minutes.”

  Well, that was the beginning of the end of the shopping trip, Claud. I did meet him back at the couch, but by then he couldn’t read anymore. He said he had been too flustered by the sight of all the bras (he whispered the word) to concentrate. So I just took a really long route out of the store and engaged in drive-by shopping as we whizzed past the merchandise. I’ll have to go back alone. I want to try on those sandals again, and I saw two great bathing suits (but I can only afford to buy one of them).

  I hope this description of my shopping trip lives up to your expectations. Are you entertained?

  I promise to write again soon.

  Lots of love,

  Stacey

  July 7

  Dear Mary Anne,

  Hi! I got your letter at mail call today! I was so glad to hear from you. Now it is quiet time. Remember that? Enforced resting, the perfect time for writing letters. At the moment, Abby and I are in our cabin with Rebecca and our campers. Abby is lying on her bunk reading some soccer magazine. Rebecca is doing her nails. (Her own, I mean, not Abby’s.) I like Rebecca. She’s okay. She doesn’t put up with any nonsense from the kids, and believe me, Marcia can create nonsense. I don’t know why she’s taken such a dislike to Harmoni. The very second she met her, she just decided she didn’t like her. The good thing about Harmoni is that she doesn’t care that Marcia doesn’t like her — which drives Marcia crazy.

  Anyway, here’s what our campers are doing:

  Marcia — putting on blue lipstick (she looks like Lily Munster)

  Kate — reading

  Harmoni — reading

  Rachel — writing a postcard

  Jenna — staring at Marcia

  LaVonne — reading

  Abby loves camp. On the first day, when we had some free time, I showed her all around. She likes the playing field and the lake. She desperately wants to ride the horses, but of course that’s out of the question. She’s hideously allergic to them. And to the hay. And to the manure. Also, she’s allergic to most of the trees here. Plus, she’s been complaining about the bugs. For an athletic person, she isn’t very outdoorsy. Still, there are enough competitive activities here to keep her more than entertained.

  Get this: Abby likes the food at camp. Even that tetrazzini thing.

  Mary Anne, I’m really sorry you didn’t find any more of your mother’s things when you went back to your house. I know you have her ring, but still … And I’m sorry about you and Logan. I guess he’s just trying to be supportive, but he sounds like he’s suffocating you. Can you talk to him about how you feel?

  By the way, I do know you’re a strong person. I’ve always known it. You may be sensitive, and you may be shy, but you are one of the strongest people I know. Also one of the best.

  Okay. I don’t want this letter to get too sappy. Quiet time is over anyway. We have free time next, and Abby and I are going to play softball. I can’t wait. I’m really having fun with Abby. (But I wish you were here too.)

  Love,

  Kristy

  Thursday, July 8th

  Hi, diary. It’s me.

  Well, my grandmother is coming. She called today with the news. She says she wants to spend some time with us right now.

  Sigh. I don’t know how I feel about that. I mean, it’s nice of her and all, but sometimes being around her is so uncomfortable. I know she feels guilty about what happened after my mother died, and now that I know the whole story, I feel funny about what happened too. It’s not like I blame Grandma or anything. I just feel funny. I was caught in the middle, even though that was so many years ago, even though it was something for Dad and my grandparents to work out.

  Oh, I don’t know what I’m saying. And worse, I can’t stop thinking about Logan. Thoughts about him are swirling around in my head all the time. Why wouldn’t they be? He calls me about six times a day — just to see how I’m doing, which is very sweet, but he’s driving me crazy.

  What I’ve realized is that by constantly checking up on me, he makes me feel as though I NEED constant checking up on. Which I don’t.

  An interesting thing is that I resent Logan’s rallying around me, but not my grandmother’s. I feel uncomfortable about my grandmother’s visit, but I don’t resent it. And I guess I do resent
what Logan is doing.

  I wonder if I want to be with Logan anymore.

  Friday Morning

  Dear Stacey,

  Finaly I got a letter form you! Thank you!!

  Boy are you smart. How did you know we wouldnt have a telephone. You wanted to know waht we’re doing without a phone — well, we do alot of walking. Theres no such thing as ordering out. You just go to get what you want and if you have to wait you wait. Or you come back for it.

  About our reading. I brought 2 books with me and your right they arent nancy Drew books. I brought a Wirnkle in Time by Mada Madd by Madl. Its a newberry winner. I think you recomended it once. And I broght Little woman but it’s sooooooo long I dont know if I’ll realy read it. But the good thing is that theres a library here I think I mentioned that in another letter which you might or migt not have gotten. Anyway, Mom and Dad and Janine brout all these fancy classical books. I don’t know what they are.

  About the meditating. I am only pretending to meditat. Whenever were supposed to be meditatting I sit there and write letters to you in my head or sometimes I plan art projets or think about paintings I whant to do. Hey maybe that IS meditating. Who knows.

  I am so jealous of you and Ethen and all the time you get to spend together. And of your time there in the big apple.

  Well Ill tell you a little more about the iland.

  I have to admit that it is one of the most beatiful places I’ve ever seen. Maybe its THE most beautifull. About the only things here beside the busineses are houses and woods. And cliffs. Well let me describe things to you. You can take walks all across and arond the island to certin points like coves. There are gull Cove and Christmas Cove and Squeaker cove and even deadmans cove. And other places are Burnt Head and Green point and Pebble Beach. Oh I forgot Lobster Cove. And across from the whole island, right where the fery comes in is a much smaller island called Manana. Guess what you can see in the water sometimes. Seals! Can you beleve it. Also there is a fantastic lighthouse kind of in the middle of the island. I forgot to mention that before. And a shipwreck. Now that I think about it theres a lot here besides houses and woods.

  Guess what. I have kept up with my lobster recorde. Lobster of some sort every singel day. Yummy delicious.

  Now that I have told you how beutiful the island is and whats here and about the lobster and all your going to think I sound spoled when I say the next thing. I am still bored.

  I AM BORED I AM BORED I AM BORED I AM BORED.

  (Do you think I sound spoilled?)

  I think I’m am going to go crazy spending an entire month here.

  Yours in bordom,

  Claudia

  Friday

  Dear Claudia,

  I think maybe our letters are still crossing in the mail or something, but at least we know they’re getting where they’re supposed to go.

  So you’re on Monhegan now. I wish I could stand at the front of a ferry and watch an island that looks like a huge rock rise out of the water. And, well, Monhegan isn’t New York, but at least you have that pizza place and the ice-cream stand and … Hmm. I’m not so sure about the lack of phone, doctor, etc., but I’m trying to be supportive. I guess you’ll just let me know how things go.

  Ethan recovered from the trip to Bloomingdale’s. (I went back the next day — alone — and bought one of the bathing suits, the cheaper one.) Guess where Ethan and I went the other night. To another party one of his friends was having. Going to a party in the middle of the week, especially a party with no adults present, was just so … freeing. Ethan’s friend Tomas is older, seventeen I think. Tomas’s parents were going to be away for several days, so Tomas invited about ten people over. We stayed up late drinking coffee and listening to the guests read poetry they’d written. It was so cool.

  Oh, who am I kidding? It was so boring. But still I felt really grown-up.

  The above is the good news.

  What follows is the bad news.

  I don’t know what has gotten into my father, but, well, I think I’ll just relate what happened this morning.

  Dad was up and dressed and eating breakfast, almost ready to leave for work, when I slouched out of my room in my nightgown, all tired. (Ethan and I didn’t go out last night, but I rented two movies and stayed up kind of late watching them.) Anyway, I slid into my chair and just watched Dad eat. I wasn’t ready for any food yet. I was barely ready for conversation. But the second I sat down, Dad eyed me and said, “I saw Ethan last night.”

  This woke me up a little. “You did?” (Dad was out with Samantha last night.)

  “Yes. Would you like to guess where?”

  I really didn’t, but I could tell by Dad’s tone of voice that (a) this was not going to be a carefree sort of conversation and (b) he expected me to guess, even though I had absolutely no idea where he had seen Ethan.

  “Um, in a restaurant?” I said.

  “No.”

  I realized I was supposed to guess again. “In a store?”

  “No.”

  “Dad, I really have no idea where you saw Ethan. He said he was going to do something with his friends, but I don’t know what.”

  “I saw him,” Dad said gravely, “outside the Pony.”

  “Really? The Pony?” I didn’t know what else to say. I mean, so he had seen Ethan outside of some place. So what.

  “Do you know what the Pony is?” Dad asked me.

  “No.”

  “It is a club for adults. For adults,” Dad repeated for emphasis. “Like the Limelight.”

  “Oh. And you saw him outside of it?”

  “Yes.”

  “Coming out of it?”

  Dad gave me a warning glance. “No, just standing in front of it.”

  “Maybe he was waiting for someone to pick him up. Or for a cab or something.”

  “I hope he wasn’t waiting to be picked up at that hour. And he didn’t look as if he were hailing a cab.”

  I tried not to sound as crabby as I suddenly felt when I said, “What are you saying, Dad?”

  “I’m afraid Ethan might not be a good influence on you. The Pony is not for kids. It is for adults.” (I wanted to point out that he had already said that, but I kept quiet.) “And I don’t approve of kids sneaking in.”

  “But Dad, you don’t know that Ethan sneaked in.”

  “Furthermore,” Dad went on as if he hadn’t heard me, “I’m wondering if maybe Ethan is too old for you. He wears an earring —”

  “Lots of kids wear earrings, kids younger than Ethan.”

  “Well, I don’t approve.”

  I didn’t realize it before, but Dad is so old-fashioned, Claud. Can you believe this conversation? What a way to start the day. I have a very bad feeling about Dad and Ethan, but I refuse to bring up the subject again. Maybe if I don’t mention Ethan, Dad will forget about this. (Although it’s going to be hard not to mention him, since we spend so much time together.) I’ll keep you posted.

  Love,

  Stacey

  July 10

  Very pleased with way am keeping up with journal. Write in it almost every day. If our house ever burns down, will have lots of nice memories, as long as journal wasn’t in house at time of fire. (Hmm. Must remember to talk to Watson about the safe.)

  A. and I having BEST time at camp. SO glad A. is here. LOVE getting to know her better.

  This morning, CITs supposed to plan projects for their campers. A. came up with great idea — scavenger hunt. And she came up with good lists of items to find. Somehow, though, activity got off to horrible start.

  Divided our kids into two teams. Should have been easy, but right off bat couldn’t decide whether to separate Marcia and Harmoni (to avoid problems) or to put them on same team in effort to force friendship. A. said forced friendship would never work and that she should know. I said well maybe it would at least force respect. A. just scowled. And in the end, she won and we put them on separate teams. So Team 1 consisted of Marcia, Kate, and Jenna. Team 2 consisted of H
armoni, Rachel, and LaVonne.

  “Okay,” A. said when girls were lined up in front of us, outside cabin. (Rebecca nowhere to be seen. Whole purpose of this morning, I believe, to give counselors time off.) “I am going to hand out your lists. Study them and ask us questions now, before we start.”

  Marcia’s hand shot up. “Do we get a prize if we win?” she asked.

  A. and I glanced at each other. Had not really thought about a prize. “A prize?” repeated A. “Of course.” She glanced at me. “Tell them about it, Kristy.”

  If didn’t suddenly like A. so much, would have turned the question back to her somehow. Instead said, “Abby is going to treat the winners to candy bars from the canteen.” (Knew A. could afford this.)

  A. scowled again, but what could she do? Campers were already jumping up and down, examining lists.

  A. and I had thought lists fair, equally difficult. But apparently not. First item on Team 1’s list — pair of eyebrow tweezers. “Ooh! Ooh!” cried Marcia. “Be right back!” Disappeared into cabin and returned with makeup bag. Hers. Produced tweezers.

  “No fair! No fair!” cried members of Team 2.

  A. and I looked at each other. Hadn’t thought even Marcia would have eyebrow tweezers at camp. So Team 2 hated us until they found extra difficult item on list very quickly and surged ahead of Team 1. As each team worked way down list, became less and less concerned about how other team was doing. Really had fun.

  In end, both teams reported back to cabin with completed lists at exact same moment. A. announced that in event of tie, both teams would get prizes, and that she would treat Team 1, while I would treat Team 2.

  Hmm. Very tricky.

  But still like A.

  July 10