A Tale Of Choice
SHELLY SAT SILENTLY for a second. She knew Tom was right. Something told her they needed to get off the road as soon as possible. She felt it as a profound need.
Quickly packing their things, they cautiously came out of hiding. As they walked on the shoulder in the hot sun, she looked for hiding spots to use, if needed, and tried not to be so frightened.
A few minutes later, in the distance there was an opening between the hills not far from them. A shallow field revealed itself and there it was… the railway line about 100 yards off the road. They had found it!
She was so overjoyed at finding it so soon that she and the children ran to the tracks without looking around them to see if it was safe. The fear inside of her eased some as they climbed up the gravel bank and stepped onto the tracks. Still no manmade sounds could be heard. No traffic, no airplanes, or trains, nothing.
The little group turned left, following the tracks that paralleled the roadway for a while. The sun beat down upon them as they grew thirsty and hungry, but it was too soon to stop. As the railway continued so near the road, Shelly was constantly looking around for danger, but nothing happened.
Shelly picked up a weary and tired little girl, as they walked along the tracks. The railway wove in and round the mountains, foliage crowding close to the tracks. The hours passed and the tracks gently but steadily turned away from the road heading north, soon the Mombasa Road disappeared. Shelly’s heart eased and she felt almost happy, if happy could be a word to use while walking with two young children out in the wilderness during a war. They walked along in relative peace. She didn’t hear any monkeys, but the sounds of birds calling to one another traveled through the air. It comforted the little group to hear them.
Later that day, the singing of the birds was replaced with the sound of roaring in the distance. Not like a lion or animal, just a constant din of noise. It grew louder as they rounded a gentle curve and observed a train trestle off in the distance. It traversed a canyon with steep sides that cut through the mountain in a deep gash. A large waterfall plunged off the mountain hundreds of feet into the gorge below, in a deafening roar, the white water vanishing into the valley beyond.
Shelly looked at the crossing and her heart sank with the peril of it. Instead of the railway ties being filled with earth and gravel, there was nothing but air in-between them, spanning the abyss. Each tie was more than a foot apart, wide enough for a child to fall through. The roar of the water masked any sound. A train could be coming up behind them right now, blowing its whistle and it wouldn’t be heard until it was too late.
If a train should use that bridge while we’re trying to cross… she closed her eyes tightly, trying to destroy the image that was forming.
Shelly looked at Tom and she could see his terror. Now what? she thought. Shelly put Faith down and walked the children back down the line, to find a spot to sit and talk about what to do next.
In the shelter of the trees and rocks, Shelly and Faith sat on a fallen log. She turned to Tom and asked him what was wrong. He walked up to her, put his hand on her shoulder and looked her in the eyes as he told her loud enough to be heard, “I can’t be up high. I’m so scared. I can’t… I just can’t!”
Shelly could see the deep-seated terror in his eyes.
Great! Now what, go back? That idea didn’t settle with her at all. She dreaded the hours it would take to go back to that unnerving road.
He can’t walk over that trestle. Even if I could get him to try, any slip would be the death of him.
She shuttered at the thought of losing him into the abyss.
Well, I’ll have to carry them both across, but can I? If I should lose my balance out there… again she cringed from the horrible thought that was forming.
She looked again. There was nothing to hang onto out there. The trestle rose from the depths as a solid wooden edifice, ending in just rails and ties at the top.
She lowered her head and prayed for an answer, but nothing came. Not sure what to do, she looked out at the structure again and decided to try, somehow. She couldn’t go back. Grasping what courage she could find, she said to the boy, “Tom, I’m going to take Faith with me and walk over the trestle. Stay here and stay hidden, okay?”
His eyes grew large and fear swam in the tears that formed there. He nodded his head yes, but all he could think about was that Shelly was taking his sister and leaving him alone on this side of that horrible place.
“I’ll come back for you and carry you across,” she offered.
Tom’s eyes grew even larger. He shook his head no, in very forceful motions.
“Do you want to go back?” she asked him. “We can do that, if you think we should,” she told him with a sinking heart, for she really didn’t want to go back, but she couldn’t and wouldn’t force him across that barrier. She wasn’t even sure she could carry him, but she had to try.
He sat for a while, stone quiet and still. Then he looked up into her eyes. She could see he was struggling to tell her.
“Tom, I’ll carry you piggy-back. I think that will be the safest way to carry you. I know I can do this. Do you want to try it or go back?”
Tears silently slid down his cheeks as he said, “We cannot go back.” He paused for a second and then said with conviction, “God does not want us to go back.”
Shelly was shocked. How does this little boy know what God wants? Can he hear God? I’m the adult. Shouldn’t God be speaking to me? Maybe he is imagining this, but somehow I doubt it. Tom has a faith I don’t possess, and when he prays God seems to answer him. He’s connected to God in a way I’m not, she thought miserably.
She sat there for a while longer, looking at this special boy, and then she told him gently and with resignation, “Okay, Tom, we’ll trust God to keep us safe.”
With a sigh and prayer for safety, Shelly made sure she had everything, adjusted the backpack and then knelt down to pick up Faith. She asked the little girl affectionately, “Can you give me a really big hug?” Faith gladly wrapped her arms around her neck. Shelly stood up and requested, “Now wrap your legs around my waist, tight.” Shelly wrapped her arms around the child and clasped her fingers together.
“You hold onto me just like this the whole way across, okay?” she asked the little girl. Faith looked at her with her large deep blue eyes, showing the trust she had in the woman that was holding her and nodded yes.
“Close your eyes if you get scared, okay?” she told her softly in her ear.
Faith just held on tighter and placed her face into Shelly’s shoulder. Her hat fell off and Tom ran over to pick it up.
“Put it in your sack Tom, will you?” Shelly asked.
He did so without a word and stood there looking small and stoic.
Shelly took a deep breath and turned to give him a large, reassuring smile. With feeling and a vow she said, “Wait here for me. I’ll be back, I promise.”
Before she got to the trestle, she practiced walking on each tie to see what it was like. She found that it was a wider stride than she was used to, but if she took her time, it wasn’t too hard to step on each one. It would be a different story once she was out there over the abyss walking on air, hundreds of feet from the forest floor and the rushing white water.
Please Lord. Keep this track as empty as that highway has been today. Please help me get the children across safely.
With her heart beating firmly, off she stepped onto the railroad ties, as the ground dropped away. She found that if she looked down, she lost all sense of balance. Fear gripped her heart in its deadly embrace. She must look at the next tie and only the next tie. She must concentrate on each step she had to take, one tie at a time, one step at a time. As she approached the waterfall, the roar of it falling at a tremendous speed next to her was disconcerting, and the spray made the wooden structure slippery. However, it was the wind swirling, buffeting, pulling and pushing her that scared her the most. Each step was an agony of fear and determination. How she prayed. How she asked
Him for strength and mercy. She talked to Him all the way across. Relief overwhelmed her as she stepped onto railway ties with solid ground in-between.
Shelly carefully stepped off the tracks and cautiously walked to a safe place. She was having a hard time trusting her legs, they were so unsteady. She put Faith down with a big sigh and took off the backpack.
“Faith, this is very important. You must stay here and wait for us. Do you promise to stay here?” she asked the small child.
“I can do that,” the Faith said with a big smile.
However, Shelly wasn’t convinced. Sometimes a small child doesn’t know what is best and ends up doing what they want and not what they should. So, just in case, Shelly took out some jerky, set the child further back in the bush, and left her there chewing on the tough meat, with the canteen of water nearby. Again, she asked Faith to wait for her return.
Please Lord, keep her safe and hidden here.
Shelly stood, looking at the abyss again. She turned to look back at Faith. With a deep breath and more prayer, she started back for Tom. The crossing this time seemed harder. There was nothing substantial to carry this time, which seemed to steady her on the way over. She felt light as a feather. Her legs were sore and they weren’t happy doing this again. Out went her arms in an effort to keep herself balanced. An image of flying came to her. That thought both excited her and frightened her. Quickly she snapped out of her wandering thoughts and gave herself over to concentrating on each tie, as she had before.
Out in the middle, her foot slipped on the wet surface and she fell forward onto the ties. By God’s grace she caught herself and did not fall through, off or over the structure. Carefully, she pulled herself up and stood on quivering, bruised legs. She was skinned up and her shoulders hurt. Her adrenaline raced through her veins causing her heart to beat powerfully and her skin tingled from her fear.
Step-by-step she again made it over the wooden structure, but the stress of the second crossing had taken its toll. She was truly spent. She needed to rest and recover, but the thought of leaving a 4-year-old child alone on the other side increased her anxiety by the second. She couldn’t, wouldn’t take the time to rest. She must get back now.
“Are you ready, Tom?” she asked in a husky voice. She could see his deep fear and the courage he was dredging up, after seeing her fall.
Dear Lord, please don’t let us fall… she held onto that plea and prayer with all of her heart as she turned to him and gently said, “Here, let’s put your father’s hat in the bag.”
In went the hat. Then he stood there, so young, so scared and so courageous.
“Let me carry the bag. You climb on now and ask God to be with us, okay?” she asked him.
Before he could do anything, she took him in her arms and hugged him with all of her heart. She was growing so fond him. Tom hugged her in return and then got ready for the crossing. He climbed onto her back. His weight was considerable, for he was a healthy 7-year-old boy. She adjusted his weight once and started toward the trestle.
Dear God, please give me the strength, she prayed for she knew her legs were getting weak and wobbly. But she couldn’t wait. She had to get back to Faith. Each second she waited could be tragic, one way or another. As she stepped out onto the structure, each step she took was getting harder and harder. The wind buffeted her and she struggled to stay upright, especially with Tom’s weight, and the sight of the sheer drop to the valley below.
As they neared the waterfall and the abyss, she knew her legs were about to give out. She feared they were not going to make it. Tom’s voice broke at first, then he spoke out loud and clear with the next step she took, “The Lord is my shepherd (step) I shall not want (step) He makes me lie down in green pastures (step) He leads me beside still waters (step) He restores my soul (step).” Shelly felt strength return to her as Tom continued to shout the verse. “He guides me in the paths of righteousness… For His name’s sake… Even though I walk… through the valley of death… I’ll fear no evil… for Thou art with me… Your rod and Your staff… they comfort me…You prepare a table before me… in the presence of my enemies… You anoint my head with oil… My cup overflows… Surely goodness and mercy… Shall follow me… all the days of my life… And I’ll dwell in the house… Of the Lord forever and ever… Amen.” They were across.
Shelly put Thomas down on the other side, fell to her knees and hugged him for a very long time. She was so profoundly touched by this boy’s courage and faith, and amazed that he knew that Psalm by heart! The words from God’s book had given her a strength and courage she had never known. Tears filled her eyes. For the first time, in days, she felt that God was really there and intent on taking care of them. She got up on wobbly legs and quickly joined Faith. The little girl ran up and hugged her brother, while Shelly collapsed near the children. Tears of exhaustion flowed with tears of joy and gratitude for their safe crossing.
“I was a really good girl,” Faith said with pride. "I waited right here and didn’t move.”
Tom sat down and put his arms around his sister. His look of relief and joy was apparent. After a few minutes of rest, Shelly brought out a can of peaches, some jerky and crackers. The fruit tasted so immensely refreshing. They ate the meat and crackers, washing it all down with the juice from the can. With their tummies full, she let them take a long drink of water.
She felt like celebrating. After all… they had traveled a long way today and they were still safe and well. It was so wonderful to be alive and able to enjoy it. She lay on her back and watched the white clouds drift by on a strong current high in the air. As she rested her legs and tried to recover from her ordeal, she began to drift off to sleep.
With a start she realized that they couldn’t stay here. She had to find a place to sleep for the night. So, on weary legs she rose, picked up their things and turned toward the railway. The children protested. They were tired and sore.
She turned to them and said, “I’m tired too, but we need to go a little farther and see if we can find a place to sleep tonight. I think we have a few more hours before it gets dark.”
The children moaned, but stood and picked up their things. They returned to the tracks and continued walking north. Nairobi still awaited them and the safety it might provide.
Where is my walking stick, she questioned with a start? Then with a sinking heart she remembered she had laid it down on the other side of the trestle.
Well, I’ll just have to find another one. I’m certainly not going back now… for any reason!
A few hours later, the sun was behind the hills with dusk developing, when they came across a junction in the tracks. Next to it was a small tool shed. Shelly put Faith down, and ran to it as the children slowly followed. It had a padlock. With a stone, she hit the lock hard, over and over again until it broke.
Inside the small room, she found enough floor space for them to sleep. She pulled out the flashlight, lit the interior and checked for snakes. On the wall hung a kerosene lantern, which she took down and lit with her matches. Setting it on a shelf, she let the children in and shut the door. The sound of the door securely clicking into place made her feel safer. The windowless interior of the shed was pitch-black, except for the light that flickered on the lantern wick. It created eerie shadows in the corners. Shelly sat down against the door, leaned her head back, closed her eyes and thanked God for his provision. She was so grateful they wouldn’t have to sleep out in the open tonight.
They were all so weary, the children, especially. They were too tired to eat. Shelly got out the can of peaches, anyway. They consumed the small, simple dinner as the children’s eyes started to droop. Out came the jackets and the shirt. Bundled up, the children fell asleep immediately. The not-so-white sack and backpack were used as pillows. Shelly reached up, turned off the lantern, then snuggled next to them in the dark, and fell asleep before her head reached the backpack.
Shelly awoke in the dark. She got up carefully, trying not to disturb the chil
dren. Crawling on her knees, she opened the door just a crack. The darkness of night outside was being exchanged for the morning light. The African sun was coming, before long it would be above the horizon and a new day would be here.
I wonder what today will bring. I wonder how far it is now to Nairobi. It’s been three days since I left Mombasa and Jim. Dear Lord, please take care of him.
She turned and lit the lantern, then closed the door and sat down on the floor next to the children, pulling out the map.
A wondrous thought manifested itself. How blessed she was to have so much available to her in her time of need. A soft, gentle voice told her that she wasn’t really alone. That He was directing her, just like the little compass.
She smiled with the comforting thought. Tom woke and stretched.
“Good morning, Tom. How are you doing?” she whispered softly.
He looked at her with a reflection of pain in his eyes and said, “I miss my mom and dad,” simply and from his heart, but he added with sincerity, “But I’m glad you’re here. I’m glad we’re not alone.”
Shelly leaned over and gave him a hug around the shoulders. “I wish this trouble had never come to your parents or to us, but it did. And if it had to happen, then I’m glad I found you two and we can be together. I like being with you and your sister,” she said warmly.
Tom smiled and gave a sigh.
“Would you get something ready for us to eat, while I take a look at the map? You can help me decide which way to go, when we leave here,” she suggested to Tom. Faith stirred, while Tom opened the backpack and got breakfast ready.
Once they had eaten, they looked at the map together, with Faith sitting on Shelly’s lap, Tom leaning against her side, and all peering at the worn out paper. It looked like they were near Kibwezi. At least that was her best guess. Outside the tracks split. She decided it was best to take the tracks on the left. If they were correct, it should continue to take them northwest and stay with the direction of the highway.
If nothing eventful happened today, she hoped to make it to the area of Sultan Hamund by nightfall. The thought of going into a town for help occurred to her again. If they could get help, it was possible they could be in Nairobi and the embassy, tonight. But they also could be captured or worse, and that thought drove out the first. No, as long as they were alive, unhurt and not ill, they are better off alone.
The morning was chilly when they left the shed, while the sun continued on its rise into the sky. Always vigilant, they continued to follow the rails in a wonderland of forest and mountains. Soon the jackets and shirt were packed away. They walked for hours undisturbed, alone in a world that should have been abundant with people, traffic and animals. Tom noticed this the most. He had grown up here and the absence of everything normal was unsettling. Along the way, they were able to refill the canteen using the iodine tablets to purify the water. Lunch was uneventful and the trio was soon walking northward again. Faith was tired, but such a trooper. She tried to be a big girl, but she was worn out and tired. They all were.
In the late afternoon, they came out of the mountains and hills into grasslands on both sides of the track. The Mombasa Road was in the far off distance on their left, out in the open as well. Still no traffic could be seen, nothing stirred. They walked cautiously along the tracks into the tall grass. An occasional Acacia tree spreading its wide thorny branches out into the sky. How exposed Shelly felt as they walked along the tracks into the open. She knew they were too visible, but there was nowhere else to go. They had to continue north and hopefully find shelter for the night. Nothing stirred. She couldn’t see a living thing.
Suddenly, thunder rolled. There were no clouds in the sky but the sound didn’t diminish. Instead, it grew louder, and louder and the ground started to tremble. Off to their right a huge cloud of dust rose to the sky. She could see a giant heard of beasts with large sharp horns thundering towards them. Frantically Shelly looked for shelter. There was nothing in the open fields to their left. On the right, an ancient tree stood alone hundreds of yards away. Dear Lord, let us make it, she prayed.
She picked up Faith in her arms and turning to Tom yelling, “Quick, we have to make it to that tree!”
As they ran towards the tree, the herd thundered towards them. Shelly made it there with Tom close behind. She pulled the boy near, placed him with Faith, crouched over them and wrapped her arms around the children just as the herd of Wildebeests went racing pass them at high speed. It was terrifying, dusty, and thunderous. The tree acted like the bow of a ship, parting the herd as it went by. She felt them bump her and smelled the hot breath of the animals as they raced by. The ground shook. It shook so hard her teeth rattled. Time stopped, as the pounding continued. Then silence.
A thick layer of dust covered the trio. Shelly began to wipe it out of their eyes and mouths, but almost immediately, the ensuing silence was shattered with loud booms in the distance, coming from the north. Whistling sounds flew overhead. Huge explosions rattled the earth just south of them. She turned to look and saw tanks coming. They were firing their rounds in turn overhead to the north. Ear shattering explosions went off in rapid succession. The earth shuddered deep within and withered in the ensuing fire and smoke which rose into the African sky.
Dear Lord, we’re caught in the middle of a battle! she screamed in her mind. Tears were in Tom’s eyes and Faith started to cry. Shelly grabbed Faith up into her arms and, taking hold of Tom’s hand, looked frantically around for a place to hide. A shallow ravine revealed itself just a few yards away. It was just a dry creek bed where water ran during the rainy season, but it would provide some cover. They needed to get out of there, and fast. They ran across the opening and into the gully keeping as low as possible.
Just as they got there, some of the tanks turned and started to fire at the railway line. They’re trying to destroy everything! she grieved in her heart. Dirt flew everywhere and the sound was deafening. Shelly’s ears rang. The grass burst into flame, and the fire spread rapidly, destroying everything in its path. They choked on the dust and smoke.
As the trio crouched in the little ditch, Tom noticed a shiny object in the soil near Shelly’s feet. He picked it up and discovered it was the little compass. She must have just dropped it. He was about to give it to her when she stood up and started to run again. He quickly put it in his pocket, and ran after her. She turned and grabbed at his hand, not wanting to lose him in the chaos.
As the smoke became denser, they continued to run away from the railway that had been their temporary life-line and guide. They ran among flames that consumed everything in its path… grass, trees and brush. The heat was so intense, it hurt to breath. Faith was so scared now that she had stopped crying. Her eyes were huge and round with fear. Tom just kept close to Shelly, holding on for dear life.
As they ran, the violence and destruction waned as they left the battlefield. Then, out of the smoke, a tank appeared ahead of them. Shelly stopped so fast, that Tom crashed right into her. It fired over their heads and then started moving, making a squeaky metal-grinding sound. Shelly turned to run away from it.
Then, an explosion so loud, so violent, tore her world apart. Shelly didn’t hear or see anything more. She was now gone from the world of war and her two charges.
Not Alone