Vigilante
They talked about Drew’s funeral on the news. They showed his mother bowed over his casket, but her makeup stayed perfect. His father was as red-faced as usual. “My son was a good boy. He was an honors student, popular and well-liked. For him to have been taken from us so soon is a crime. I have faith that justice will be done.”
I stared at the screen. That was almost exactly what Mrs. Torres had said about Magda. Now, here it was Drew who was gone, and I was the one with the video that made him look bad. I was the one lying to police. Someday, was someone going to come after me to avenge Drew?
I called Diane. Asked her to come over when my mother was at work. When she arrived, she hugged me. “What do you want to talk about?” she asked as she sat on the couch.
“I’m the Pink Vigilante,” I told her. “Me.”
She didn’t look surprised. In fact, she looked like I’d just told her a stupid joke. “Are you?”
“Yes. It’s me.”
“So, you broke up a domestic dispute outside Hurley’s bar last night?”
I stared at her. “No.”
“Did you show up at a college party the night before and drive drunk girls home?”
“No.”
She leaned forward, resting her forearms on the thighs of her jeans. “Since that night at Drew’s, two other people have confessed to being the Pink Vigilante. One was a guy, and the other was someone you know.”
Zoe, I was willing to bet. “You didn’t believe them?”
“No, I believe them. I believe you, too. The thing is, Hadley, that the Vigilante is no longer one person. It’s bigger than that.”
“But I was the first. I started it.”
“Can you prove it?”
“What?” This was too surreal. “That’s your job, isn’t it?”
She shrugged. “When this first started, I thought it was you, but I couldn’t find anything but circumstantial evidence. The blood we found at the pit party was contaminated, so we couldn’t get a DNA sample. That day at the cemetery, I saw someone else wearing a pink ski mask fleeing the scene as I arrived. Jason, Brody and Adam weren’t able to identify you as the Vigilante—or anyone else for that matter. If you want to confess, go ahead, but at this point, unless you can back it up, you’re just going to be another attention seeker.”
Was she high? “You’re joking.”
“You don’t even have a ski mask. At least the other people have had masks. We didn’t find one when we searched the house.”
“So what you’re telling me is that you wouldn’t arrest me even if I asked you to.”
“Do you want me to arrest you?”
“I should pay for what I’ve done, shouldn’t I?”
Her expression turned sympathetic. “Oh, honey. You don’t need to be arrested for that. I look at you and it breaks my heart. I can’t imagine what it was like for you in that room with Drew, or what it was like to watch him die. I know your mom is arranging for you to see a therapist, and I think that’s a good idea. I hope your doctor will be able to help you come to terms with things.”
“Come to terms?”
She nodded. “Two years ago, I shot and killed a man who had broken into his old house to kill his former girlfriend. It was a good shooting, but I still dream about it. It still keeps me up at night wondering if I did the right thing, thinking about the fact that I took a life that I truly don’t believe was mine to take.”
I swallowed. There was a lump in my throat that felt like my heart. “You mean I have to find a way to live with it.”
“Can you?”
“Yes.” It came out as a whisper. “I think I can.”
Diane gave a sharp nod. “I think you can, too. I’m always here for you, if you want me. I hope you’ll continue to help with the class.”
I nodded. What was this feeling inside me? Confusion? I felt...lost. Like I didn’t know which end was up. I’d just confessed and it meant nothing. No more than Drew’s apology. No more than Magda’s reputation.
“Good.” She stood. “I wish I could stay, but I’m on duty and have to get back. Are you going to be okay here alone?”
I nodded. “Yeah.” I had homework, and Gabe was coming by later.
She smiled and put her hand on my shoulder. “You’re going to be okay, Hadley. I know it.”
“Thanks.”
“Just tell me your vigilante days are done.”
I met her gaze. “You know they are.” I’d already confessed, so more honesty didn’t matter.
“Yeah,” she said, her expression softening. “I guess they are. I’ll see you later.”
I rose to my feet and watched her leave, her shoulders straight beneath her leather jacket. “Hey.” She turned. “My mask. What happened to it?”
Diane’s lips lifted on one side. “What mask?” And then she was gone.
* * *
“It feels like snow.”
Gabe placed the flowers we’d brought with us at the base of Magda’s headstone. “She loved snow.” He straightened and put his arm around my shoulders. “Maybe we can take Teresa sledding.”
I smiled. “I’d like that.” We used to go all the time, the four of us. Me, Magda, Gabe and Teresa. It was the only part of winter I found even remotely enjoyable. We hadn’t gone much the year before; Magda hadn’t wanted to do it.
It was late November. Thanksgiving was tomorrow. My mom and I had been invited to dinner at the Torres house. It was our first holiday without my father, and the first Thanksgiving since Magda’s death. It felt right that we should all spend it together.
I had a lot to be thankful for, I knew that. I just didn’t completely believe it. I was alive. Drew hadn’t raped me, hadn’t killed me. He was gone, and would never hurt anyone ever again.
But I had killed him. I hadn’t planned that, and for all my talk of revenge, I hadn’t wanted to kill him, even if I’d wished him dead. I had to live with that. I understood what Diane had said to me a couple of weeks ago at my house. I think what made me feel the guiltiest was that I could live with having killed him. Sure, sometimes I dreamed about that night, and I woke up sweating, my heart racing. But I always went back to sleep. It wasn’t Drew’s death that weighed on my soul.
It was Magda’s.
My revenge hadn’t brought her back. Hadn’t changed anything that happened to her. The only thing that had been changed was me. I still mourned her, but the anger was gone. I almost missed it. Anger felt like purpose, but sadness...well, it was just sad.
Drew Carson’s father had wanted to hang me for killing his kid, until the police found Drew’s library of “conquests.” He’d recorded himself raping five additional girls—all of whom had been too drugged to fight him. One of the girls was Zoe. She hadn’t told anybody when it happened, but she told me after the video had been found. We talked a lot about what had happened to her, and Magda.
And me.
It was hard to talk because Zoe’s mother didn’t want her talking to me. We had to be sneaky. I hadn’t seen Anna and Caitlin since Halloween. Their parents had completely forbidden them from coming near me. Apparently they’d pulled both of them from the self-defense class too. I sent them both emails to apologize, but they never responded.
I was also not welcome back at Carter. The school board decided that it would be “best” for me and the rest of the student body if I finished my year online rather than cause upset with my presence. I’d managed to keep my grades up, so I was still going to be able to go to college next year. Maybe I’d go away, where they didn’t know who I was or what I’d done. Gabe and I talked about taking off together. I didn’t know if it would ever happen, but it was nice to talk about. I was thinking about becoming a therapist. The one I’d been seeing—Dr. Anders—was good. She didn’t make me feel like she judged me, and she told me she oft
en worked with victims of assault.
I didn’t kid myself that I wasn’t one of them.
The law had decided that what I’d done was an accident. Drew’s previous attack on me helped back that up. Plus, Drew had been obsessed with the Pink Vigilante and told several people he’d kill her if he ever found her. He’d recorded attacking me that night, and everyone who watched the video heard him accuse me of being the Vigilante. Everyone agreed that he had been a sexual predator and that I, as his last victim, would have been raped and quite possibly killed.
His victim. God, I hated thinking of myself that way, but Zoe had been right that day at school when she said that Drew and his friends hadn’t needed to physically rape me. They’d still hurt me. So, people could call me a victim if they wanted. That didn’t mean I had to think of myself as one—or act like one.
The self-defense class continued. We had to start a second one we had so many girls. I still helped Diane teach it. My mom wanted to learn too, so Diane started an adult course, as well. It kept me really busy, but I liked it. It gave me the social connection that had been taken away from me when the school kicked me to the curb.
I asked my mom about the ski mask. At first I thought she was going to deny it, then she told me she burned it in the kitchen sink and put it through the disposal. I cried, because I knew how much trouble she could get into because of me. How much trouble Diane, Gabe and Zoe could get into because of me. How much trouble girls who didn’t even know me had risked to protect me—and protect other girls. It was humbling.
Gabe squeezed me close and kissed me. His lips were warm, despite the chill in the air. “Ready?” he asked. We had plans to go to a movie and then grab some Thai. I was staying over at his place that night—Mom and Mrs. Torres were okay with it. I think Mom was just glad I felt like being with a guy after all that had happened. Her dragging me to the doctor for birth control had been embarrassing, but I knew she trusted me to make the right decisions where my body was concerned.
“Almost,” I said, giving him another peck. I stepped away so I could open my bag. I took out the brand-new pink ski mask that was folded up inside. I unfolded the mask and draped it over the top of Magda’s headstone, like an offering. Or a goodbye.
There were still reports of the Pink Vigilante in the area, stepping in to help girls and women when needed, but it wasn’t me anymore. I might have started something, but my part in it was finished. Diane had been right when she said it was bigger than me now. When I first put on that mask, I hadn’t meant for it to stand for something, or for it to become a symbol. I just wanted to hide my face. I was fine letting other girls pick up the mantle and carry on. I didn’t need the Pink Vigilante anymore, and if I wanted to help someone, I didn’t need to use my fists.
“Now, I’m ready.”
He smiled and held out his gloved hand. I placed my own in it, and we walked away. The sun peeked out from between the clouds, chasing some of the chill out of the day. Gabe and I had lives to live, and we were going to live them together for as long as we could. I was going to look forward from now on, not back. I didn’t even glance over my shoulder at Magda’s grave. She wasn’t there, and nothing could bring her back. I had finally started to accept that.
She would be with me. And so, I realized, would Drew Carson. I was going to carry his memory with me for the rest of my life. I would have to live with the fact that I ended his life. Could I live with that?
Yeah. I could live with that.
* * * * *
Looking for more incredible stories from Kady Cross? Be sure to check out the SISTERS OF BLOOD AND SPIRIT series—a must read for fans of paranormal romance!
Twin sisters. One’s a ghost and one’s alive, but they’re the only ones who can protect the living from the dead. And, sometimes, the dead from the living.
Read the complete series today!
SISTERS OF BLOOD AND SPIRIT (Book 1)
SISTERS OF SALT AND IRON (Book 2)
Looking for magic, mystery and romance?
Enter the world of THE STEAMPUNK CHRONICLES!
Gifted teens battle cunning villains in a world where science rules, automatons run amok, and evolution is out of control.
“A darkly seductive, ingenious world…I want more Kady Cross!”
—New York Times bestselling author Sophie Jordan
Read the complete series!
THE STRANGE CASE OF FINLEY JAYNE (Novella)
THE GIRL IN THE STEEL CORSET (Book 1)
THE GIRL IN THE CLOCKWORK COLLAR (Book 2)
THE DARK DISCOVERY OF JACK DANDY (Novella)
THE GIRL WITH THE IRON TOUCH (Book 3)
THE WILD ADVENTURE OF JASPER RENN (Novella)
THE GIRL WITH THE WINDUP HEART (Book 4)
Connect with us at www.HarlequinTEEN.com for info on our new releases, access to exclusive offers, free online reads and much more!
Other ways to keep in touch:
Facebook.com/HarlequinTEEN
Twitter.com/HarlequinTEEN
Instagram.com/HarlequinTEEN
Looking for more compelling tales of diversity, love, hope, strength and honesty?
Discover the award-winning writing of New York Times bestselling author Robin Talley!
Praise for Robin Talley:
“OUR OWN PRIVATE UNIVERSE is the open, honest, thoughtful coming-of-age queer girls have been waiting for.”
—Dahlia Adler, author of Under the Lights
“LIES WE TELL OURSELVES might be fiction, but the story is true—and it’s one we should never forget.”
—NPR
“Important. Brave. Necessary.”
—I.W. Gregorio, author of None of the Above, on WHAT WE LEFT BEHIND
“With vividly drawn characters and killer prose, this is Robin Talley’s writing at its best. I couldn’t put it down.”
—Miranda Kenneally, bestselling author of Catching Jordan, on WHAT WE LEFT BEHIND
“This title is a must-read for high school Gay Straight Alliance members... Toni’s genderqueer identity contributes a fresh perspective to LGBTQ fiction.”
—School Library Journal (starred review), on WHAT WE LEFT BEHIND
Read them all!
OUR OWN PRIVATE UNIVERSE
LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
WHAT WE LEFT BEHIND
Connect with us at www.HarlequinTEEN.com for info on our new releases, access to exclusive offers, free online reads and much more!
Other ways to keep in touch:
Facebook.com/HarlequinTEEN
Twitter.com/HarlequinTEEN
Instagram.com/HarlequinTEEN
Did you enjoy VIGILANTE? Then you’ll absolutely fall in love with REBELS LIKE US by Liz Reinhardt—a compelling tale of bravery, compassion and strength in the face of adversity.
Inspired by real events, REBELS LIKE US features an edgy, vivid voice and a heroine to cheer for.
When Agnes “Nes” Murphy-Pujols is forced to move from Brooklyn to middle-of-nowhere Georgia halfway through her senior year, she plans to just keep her head down until graduation. But her smart mouth soon gains her the ire of the administration and the school queen bee, and the interest of resident golden boy Doyle Rahn.
With Doyle as her guide, Nes’s new home starts to grow on her. Then he tells her about Ebenezer High’s long-standing prom tradition: two proms. One black, one white. Soon, Doyle and Nes band together with a team of classmates to plan an alternate prom. But when a lighted cross is left burning in Nes’s yard, the alterna-prommers realize that bucking tradition comes at a price. Maybe, though, that makes taking a stand even more important.
Read it today!
Connect with us at www.HarlequinTEEN.com for info on our new releases, access to exclusive offers, free online reads and much more!
Other ways to keep in touch:
Facebook.com/HarlequinTEEN
Twitter.com/HarlequinTEEN
Instagram.com/HarlequinTEEN
If you loved VIGILANTE, check out these other powerful and compelling YA reads from author Hannah Harrington!
“[SPEECHLESS] belongs in every discussion about bullying.”
—Jennifer Brown, author of Hate List
Everyone knows that Chelsea Knot can’t keep a secret.
A teen girl takes a vow of silence after revealing a secret that turns her into a social outcast and nearly gets someone killed. But can she remain quiet when she’s ignored, ridiculed and even attacked?
“SAVING JUNE is a fresh, fun and poignant book that I couldn’t tear myself away from.”
—Kody Keplinger, author of The DUFF
“If she’d waited less than two weeks, my sister would be June who died in June. But I guess she never took that into account.”
Harper Scott was left devastated after her sister, June, took her own life a week before high school graduation. Now it’s up to Harper, her best friend, Laney, and Jake, a boy with a bad attitude and an unknown connection to June, to take her sister’s ashes to the one place she always dreamed of going—California.
Read them now!
SPEECHLESS
SAVING JUNE
Connect with us at www.HarlequinTEEN.com for info on our new releases, access to exclusive offers, free online reads and much more!
Other ways to keep in touch:
Facebook.com/HarlequinTEEN
Twitter.com/HarlequinTEEN
Instagram.com/HarlequinTEEN
ISBN-13: 9781488015328
Vigilante
Copyright © 2017 by Kady Cross
All rights reserved. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of publisher, Harlequin Enterprises Limited, 225 Duncan Mill Road, Don Mills, Ontario, M3B 3K9 Canada.