Forever With Me

  “Like hell.” I step forward and cage her in against her door, my hands on either side of her face, and lean in, but don’t touch her. Not yet. She takes a deep breath and lays a hand on my chest to push me away, but instead swallows hard and stares at my mouth.

  “I couldn’t stay there,” she whispers before catching herself. She grips my shirt in her fist and scowls up at me with bright, angry brown eyes. “And it’s none of your business if I decided to come home for the day.”

  “It’s my business, tesoro, to make sure you’re okay, and you clearly weren’t if you felt that you couldn’t stay in my home after I’d just spent the better part of last night and this morning inside you.” Unable to resist touching her for one more moment, I drag my knuckles down her cheek, and feel the flare of satisfaction when her eyes close and she leans into my touch. “Invite me in, please.”

  “I told Emily I’d help her tonight.”

  “You can un-tell her.”

  “You’re not going to leave, are you?”

  “No, cara, I’m not leaving.”

  She opens the door at her back and motions for me to follow her into her apartment, closes and locks the door and pulls her phone out of her bra.

  “Emily, I’m sorry, something’s come up, and I won’t be able to help you after all.” She smiles as she watches me lean my hips back against her kitchen counter. “I know you didn’t really need me in the first place. But you know where to find me if you do need anything. Good luck.” She clicks off and sets the phone and her handbag on the table by the front door. “Happy?”

  “No.” I sigh and cross my arms over my chest. “No, I don’t think happy is the right word to describe how I feel.”

  “How do you feel?”

  “Frustrated. Concerned. Baffled. To start.”

  She nods slowly and walks past me to the kitchen, pours us each a glass of Merlot, then passes one to me.

  “This isn’t one of mine,” I comment wryly and take a sip.

  “No, but it’s nice.” She walks out of the kitchen toward the living room and I can smell her citrusy shampoo as she passes by.

  “Hmm.” The wine is nice, and I have a feeling she needs it to bolster her courage.

  “Have a seat,” she says, motioning to the couch, and I have to take a breath to rein in my temper. This morning, she was writhing beneath me and now she’s speaking to me like I’m a business associate.

  So, I sit right next to her and brace my arm on the back of the couch behind her head and pull the pins out of her hair, letting it spill into my fingers.

  “That took me a while to put up,” she says.

  “I like it down.”

  “I’ve noticed.”

  “Talk to me, cara.”

  “What do you want me to say?”

  “Fuck this.” I take her glass and set them both on the coffee table, then cradle her face in my hands and kiss the hell out of her. She gasps and grips my shirt in her fists at my sides and holds on tight as I take the kiss from hot and hard to soft and lazy and back again, before pulling away and staring into her eyes. They’ve gone soft and glassy, making me feel satisfied. “That’s better.”

  “You’re good at that,” she whispers with a sigh.

  “As are you. I don’t want you to pull away from me, tesoro. Not now. Not after last night.”

  She tries to look down, but I catch her chin with my thumb and finger and keep her gaze locked on mine. “If you get scared, or nervous, or have doubts, you run to me, not from me, do you understand?”

  “This is so far outside my comfort zone, I don’t know what to do.”

  “I think that’s the most honest thing you’ve ever said to me,” I murmur and kiss her forehead. “I’m not letting you slip through my fingers, Alecia. I’m not going anywhere, today or any other day. But I can’t understand if you don’t talk to me.”

  She shakes her head and closes her eyes, but not before I see the pain there, and my own heart cracks for her.

  “Being naked with you is easy compared to talking to you about my past.”

  “I love it when you’re naked with me,” I murmur with a smile. She opens her eyes and grins back at me. “But I need you to talk to me. Let’s start with what we were talking about the other night. I believe you said something about not believing in happily ever after.” She squirms and finally pushes me away, and then stands.

  And just when I think she’s going to throw me out of her apartment, she surprises me with, “Let’s take a bath.”

  Chapter Ten

  She doesn’t stop to see if I’m following her as she walks purposefully into the bathroom, wine in hand, and turns on the taps of the garden tub.

  “Nice bathroom,” I comment calmly as I lean a shoulder against the doorjamb, watching her as she bustles about, keeping her hands busy pinning her hair back on her head and setting out towels.

  “It sold me on the place,” she replies with a grin. “I haven’t used the tub yet. No time.”

  She kicks out of her sexy black heels and begins stripping off her clothes as the tub fills and the room heats up, and I can only stand here and watch her. She’s not trying to tease me, she’s not trying to be enticing.

  And yet I want to rush to her, strip her bare and fuck her against the bathroom vanity more than I’ve ever wanted anything.

  Except to hear what she has to say. She won’t make eye contact, and I let her take her time to get comfortable. She pours something into the water that makes the room smell like jasmine. Turning her back from me, and this will be the last fucking time she ever does that, she strips bare and sinks down into the water.

  “Are you just going to stand there and look at me?” she asks testily.

  “Was that an invitation?”

  She exhales deeply and closes her eyes, then offers me a shy smile. “I’m sorry. Yes, please join me.”

  I push away from the doorway and unbutton my shirt, slip it off my shoulders and hang it on the hook behind the door. I don’t take my eyes off of her as I undress, and can’t help the smile that comes as her eyes follow my hands, gliding down my body. She licks her bottom lip as her eyes widen and her breathing picks up. I walk toward her, but rather than sit behind her, I sink into the water opposite her, pick her foot up and begin to dig my thumb into the sole, earning a low moan from her sweet lips.

  “Oh, God, that’s good.”

  I’m not sure what to do for her, and this is a first for me. So I simply sit and wait, letting the hot water work its magic, relaxing us both, and finally, after long minutes of me rubbing her feet and calves, she leans her head back on the edge of the tub, closes her eyes, and begins to talk.

  “I’m not a particularly lovable person, Dominic.”

  And pisses me off from the first words out of her gorgeous mouth.

  “My mother never made it a secret that she didn’t want children.”

  “Are you an only child?” I ask quietly, casually.

  “Yes. My parents didn’t plan to have kids, and I was a mistake.”

  You’re not a motherfucking mistake.

  “From the time I was small, it was clear that I was an interruption. They loved each other, very much, and intended to always be a couple.” She pauses and bites her lip, a small frown between her eyebrows, as though she’s choosing her words carefully. “It wasn’t that they didn’t love me, in their way, they just weren’t interested in me.”

  I rub my hands up her calves, massaging the muscles in her slender legs and concentrate on keeping my breathing even and face calm.

  “From the time I was old enough to eat by myself, my mom would fix me a plate and set me up in front of the television to eat, so she and dad could eat together in the kitchen. That was their time. It still is.” She shrugs her shoulders, making her nipples surface above the water line and pucker from the cold air. Her cheeks are flushed pink from the warmth of the water. She’s pink everywhere.

  Gorgeous.

  “They kept me busy in school,??
? she continues. Her voice is perfectly calm. There’s no anger, no sadness. Just composure. “I also play the piano. I had lessons twice a week from the time I was four until I graduated from high school. Then, when I wasn’t involved with piano, they had me in soccer, basketball, and softball.”

  She cringes and then laughs. “I fucking hate to run.”

  “You hate to run?” I ask with a smile.

  “I do. I hate it. And they always signed me up for things that involved running. I asked if I could do cheerleading or anything else, but those sports were on a regular rotation, so I was always doing something after school.” She sighs. “That’s probably why I don’t like to exercise much now and my ass is too big.”

  “Your ass is not too big,” I reply calmly, but inside I want to beat the shit out of her parents. Who the fuck treats their child like they’re an imposition? “Besides, you run around plenty for your job. In heels, no less.” I drag my thumb along her arch, earning a groan from her.

  “I’m used to the heels,” she replies and smiles at me, then leans her head back again and continues her story. “So, I was in school all day, practicing something each afternoon, then doing school work until bedtime each day.”

  “Surely your parents attended your games. Your recitals?”

  “No, those were their date nights,” she replies quietly. “I don’t recall them ever going to an event.”

  My hands still on her foot, and tighten just a bit as pure rage seers through me. Alecia’s head comes up and she frowns at me. “What’s wrong?”

  I shake my head and resume rubbing her foot. “Nothing. Go on.”

  Her eyes narrow on mine for a moment, then she shrugs and leans her head back again. “You’ve got good hands.”

  “You’ve got good feet,” I reply, waiting her out.

  “So, when I was a senior in high school, I met Jonathan. He was…attentive.”

  “Attentive?” I ask.

  “He paid attention to me. I was always kind of shy. I didn’t make a lot of friends, mostly because I was always too busy to spend time with them after school. But Jonathan paid attention. He was also a senior. He used to say he liked the looks of me.” She giggles.

  “Why wouldn’t he like the looks of you?”

  “It was the turn of phrase that made me laugh. He could be charming. And he was interested in me.”

  And you soaked that up like a sponge in the ocean, fiorellino.

  “My parents happily sent me off to college. They didn’t care which one, as long as I went away.”

  How in the fucking hell can she be so calm? My heart is aching for her, and she’s as cool as can be. I continue to rub her, sure to be quiet, so I don’t spook her. I have a feeling at this point she’s just relaxed and talking on autopilot.

  “So, Jonathan and I went to the same college, and eloped to Vegas our junior year.” She chuckles and shakes her head. “I thought he was the sexiest, funniest person in the world. I was a stupid, young girl.”

  “How long did it last?” I ask quietly.

  “Longer than it ever should have,” she replies with a sigh. “Jonathan made it clear from early in the relationship that I was a huge disappointment.”

  I can’t take it anymore. I grip her foot tightly and pull her toward me, turn her around, and settle her between my legs, wrap my arms around her and plant my lips on her head.

  “Go on.”

  “Are you okay?” she asks with surprise.

  “I am now.” No, I’m not fucking okay. I have to take another deep breath, inhaling in the sweet scent of her, feel her against me, warm and strong and whole, to calm myself. “How did he make you feel like you were a disappointment?” My voice is deceptively calm.

  “I was a disappointment, Dom.”

  “Why?”

  She shrugs and laces her fingers through mine, then hugs our hands to her chest.

  “I didn’t like the same things that he did.” She falls silent for a minute, and then swears ripely, surprising the hell out of me. “He liked to go to sex clubs, shows, places where clothing was optional. I didn’t feel comfortable going to those places.”

  “Okay.” I’m clearly missing something.

  “No, not okay.” She kisses my fingers. “He wanted me to wear skimpy clothes that I wasn’t comfortable in. I know I’m not horrible on the eyes, but I do have curves, and I don’t feel that it’s appropriate to walk around half naked in front of people I don’t know. Hell, I don’t particularly like walking around half naked in front of people I do know.” She chuckles, but I don’t find it fucking funny. “It would make him angry. He wouldn’t yell at me, though. No, he would just ignore me.”

  “Ignore you?” I can’t help the tightness in my voice.

  “Yeah.” She sighs. “He knew that ignoring me was the best way to hurt me. I’d been ignored most of my life.”

  “So, he ignored you as a punishment.”

  “He did. And as time passed, it got worse. He would sleep on the couch, which he knew made me crazy. Wouldn’t speak to me for days, sometimes weeks at a time. When I started the business, and completed my first wedding, I asked him to take me out for a fun dinner to celebrate.”

  I hug her closer to me.

  “And he said, ‘Why? It’s just a fucking job.’” She chuckles and shakes her head, then glances over her shoulder at me.

  “He was an asshole,” I mutter.

  “Yeah. But—”

  “But?”

  “Well, I’m not going to say I deserved it, because that’s ridiculous, but he was right. It was just a job.”

  “It was something you worked hard on, and you wanted to celebrate it. It wasn’t just a job for you. And if he’d loved you the way he should have loved his wife, he would have seen that.”

  “Hmm,” is her only response. “So, back to the love thing.”

  “The love thing?” I ask with a laugh.

  “It’s just not in me,” she replies and shrugs a shoulder, but then plants another kiss on my hand. “So, I’m comfortable with pursuing a physical relationship, if you’re still interested in that, but don’t expect much more from me, because you’ll just be disappointed.”

  Her voice is perfectly matter of fact and reasonable and I want to just…shake her.

  What?

  She leans her blonde head back and gazes up at me. “Dom?”

  “Ah, tesoro,” I murmur and glide my wet knuckles down her cheek softly. “Let’s table this discussion for now, okay?” I grip her hips in my hands and lift her to her feet, then pull myself up behind her, help her step out of the tub and reach for a towel. I wrap it around her shoulders, and gripping each end in my hands, I pull her against me, making her grin shyly.

  “No more talking?” she whispers, her eyes pinned to my lips.

  “Maybe less talking.” I lower my lips and gently brush them over hers, barely touching her skin, before nibbling the corner of her mouth and then gliding my tongue along her bottom lip to the other side, where I can nibble some more.

  She shivers, so I let my hands roam over the towel, drying her off. When we’re both dry, I lift her in my arms, snag her bottle of lotion from the sink and carry her into her bedroom.

  It’s dark now. With Alecia cradled in my arms, I pull the linens back on her bed, switch on the sidelight and gently lower her onto the bed, laying her on her back.

  She’s watching me through dreamy eyes, relaxed from the warm bath.

  “You are sure handsome to look at,” she murmurs, and lifts my hand to her lips.

  “You have such a sweet heart,” I whisper, as I lean in and kiss her forehead. “Close your eyes.”

  “It’s too early to go to sleep,” she replies.

  “I’m not trying to put you to sleep.” I rub lotion between my hands, warming it, then begin to massage it into Alecia’s soft, smooth skin. I run my hands over her arm, her shoulder and her hand and grin when she sighs deeply and closes her eyes.

  “You’re good with your hands,
” she says.

  “They enjoy touching you,” I reply, as I move to the other side, then add more lotion and glide my hands over her upper chest, between her breasts and down her sides. “You have the smoothest skin I’ve ever seen.”

  “The skin is the largest organ in your body. You should take care of it,” she says primly, making me chuckle.

  “Brains as well as a beautiful face.” I work my way down her legs and give her feet another good rub, earning a long sigh of contentment from her. “Don’t the shoes you wear kill your feet?”

  “No,” she replies immediately, then bites her lip and squints one eye open to gaze at me warily. “Okay, can you keep a secret?”

  “Anything you ever say will stay between the two of us, cara.”

  “They fucking kill me,” she says, and closes her eyes again, but the corners of her lips tip up in a smile. “But I love them too much to ever wear anything else.”

  “You look fucking amazing in them,” I reply, as I urge her to turn over onto her belly. She cradles her head in her arms and sighs deeply as my hands glide up and down her slender back, kneading and stretching her muscles. “You have great legs.”

  “That comes from walking in four-inch heels every day. Sweet Jesus, that feels good.” I move over the spot on her right shoulder again, and if I’m not mistaken, she purrs. “Don’t ever stop touching me,” she whispers with a blissful sigh, and my heart catches.

  “That’s the plan.” I lean in and kiss her neck, right in the spot behind her ear that drives her mad. She sighs again, and her hips tip up, brushing her ass over my already hard cock. Her lips are still curved at the corners, and a blush creeps up her cheeks as she rotates her hips once again, feeling the heavy weight of my dick against her ass.

  I grin and kiss her neck again, then drag my lips down to her shoulder and over between her shoulder blades. Her hand grasps the pillow, but I whisper in her ear, “Relax, babe,” and she lets go, then frowns up at me.

  “I prefer the Italian.”

  I raise a brow. “Is that so?”

  “You know it is.” She purses her lips in a pout and closes her eyes again as my fingertips trail lightly down her back and up her sides, making her squirm.