The Return of the Bitch from Hell
"Interesting as that may be at a less pressing time Christina, may I now continue?" David asked.
"Of course David, go right ahead." Christina replied sweetly being only to anxious to hear what he had to impart to them.
"In this volume on the satanic arts that we confiscated, along with many others, from the late Ulysses Bourbon, I have found a spell that will take us to the Netherworld as Christina has now named it. However, the curious thing is this spell was not in the book last night, someone has inserted it there for me to find along with a list of everything that we will need to make the spell work?" David declared quizzically.
"The answer to one of our problems mysteriously appears and you rightly wonder who put it there David, but if it was Moira then she would not need to lure us to the Netherworld, she could either have her dark lord beam us up or she could despatch a killer demon to take us out." Rob mused.
"So what you are saying Rob, is that the angels, for want of a better term, have inserted it there for us to find and use against the forces of evil." Christina interjected again. "But that means that we can free Cassie, this is wonderful Rob, simply stupendous." She cried out joyfully.
Rob and David looked at Christina and nodded and then David mentioned the rest of the problem that he had been working on before getting out of bed that morning.
"Christina, while we can now travel to the Netherworld, we now need a way to rid the world of Moira and deal with her dark lord, only then can we rescue Cassie."
Christina`s shoulders slumped and she looked decidedly sorry for herself until Rob asked a question of his friend and then she perked up.
"Tell me David, is it just our astral body that will be transported to the Netherworld with this spell, as when Lord Asbaritch transported us there, or will our physical body be transported as when Moira took us to Tartarus, if so can we take some weapons with us, some very tangible things?" Rob asked.
David looked at his friend and smiled. "Let me re-read it again, it will not take too long but I want to answer your question correctly." David replied realising just why his friend had asked the question and feeling very hopeful about the answer.
He then began to carefully read through the spell and the explanatory notes that always accompanied anything written by the late Ulysses Bourbon, as this particular spell appeared to be, for whoever had inserted it had copied his system, obviously they did not want their identity to be known. Ten minutes later and David was ready to answer Rob`s question.
"Rob, I would say that we could drive a Chieftain tank through it, if you wanted to, although I imagine that the dark lord would hear it coming and blast it into atoms."
Rob then crossed the room, took Christina in his arms, and after kissing her spoke so everyone could hear him.
"Christina the impossible part of our problem was getting to the Netherworld, we already knew that we can deal with Moira, even if we are playing on her turf, as for Lord Asbaritch, I have thought of a way to even up the odds." Rob declared boldly. "When we enter the Netherworld we do so in a Water Cannon full of holy water, one of those vehicles they use abroad to quell riots." Rob explained. "We can also take with us all of the protections that we used against her in the SIS office, only this time it must be enough to protect us and the Water Cannon against the dark lord as well. We will also need to issue an automatic rifle to each person who accompanies us on our trip to Hell. These foolhardy heroes will also need a 20 litre garden sprayer filled with holy water, this they can use when they are not under the protection given by the arc of water coming from the cannon, or if we are there for longer than planned." Rob promised. "No contest Darling, I tell you that it is all over bar the shouting, put up the welcome home banner for Cassie."
David hoped that Rob was correct, and seeing as how the portents seemed to indicate that Rob was, he did not put a damper on the hopes of those assembled there. However, he would only begin to celebrate when they had Cassie back home and the forces of evil had been overcome. He now spoke to his two friends about the many other things that he would require.
"We will also need a long list of items from the Magic Shop, the emporium which has supplied many of the items that we have used in the past. I am pretty sure that it will carry all of the items in stock along with a certain statue that adorns its window." David said.
"Why will we need a statue, are we about to bow down before a god other than our own one?" Rob asked.
"I would never do such a thing Rob, you know me better than that, no this statue has always been thought of as just a rather ugly decoration for The Magic Shop`s front window. It is only now that I find that it is another lost and very ancient device created by an equally forgotten Satanist who wanted to enter the Netherworld in search of treasure. Whether he succeeded I do not know, but his device survived his attemp, and we know where to find it." David replied.
Rob immediately called Sir Willoughby Brown and told him what he planned to do and what he required to accomplish what had seemed impossible earlier that morning.
"Rob, your words have taken a great weight off my mind, for we are one day away from disaster. Moira visited Rome this morning; she used her monstrous machine again, killing ten of Rome`s citizens, and then went on to loot a clothes store. Rob, before she left she made a demand over their CCTV system, that you and David are delivered to her by breakfast tomorrow or she will make the danger posed by the alien monsters seem trivial by comparison.
That is how long we have to defeat her and my god now we can do just that. As for your requirements Rob, I know where I can lay my hands on a Water Cannon, I will arrange for it to be delivered to Salisbury plain as soon the exact position of your departure point and the time have been confirmed, which will be after I have spoken to the Ministry of Defence. Luckily, the army are conducting manoeuvres on Salisbury plain so you will be able to open your portal without an audience. As for the automatic weapons, the army can supply those along with enough ammunition to take out a dozen Satanists. I will also arrange for your own list of rather unique munitions to be waiting there for you. Ten kilos of salt, six of the large garden pressure sprayers, eight strings of garlic, eight small bottles of mercury. Finally there is the list of some very peculiar items that not even a witch would touch. They all sum up to a very strange list of weapons to wage a war with, but ones in this case that I know to be very essential." Sir Willoughby Brown promised. "Oh and don`t worry Rob, I will ensure that the departure point has a large enough area of level concrete for both the extra size pentagram and also for the water Cannon to drive over."
"Thank you Sir Richard, and as you say a very strange arsenal with which to wage a war." Rob replied.
"Rob, she must be stopped, quickly and for good." Sir Willoughby Brown declared grimly before adding some instructions. "Rob, I cannot stress this enough, when you have finally killed Moira Bourbon, bring her body back with you and personally witness its destruction, her body must be destroyed, no matter how saintly she may appear when she is overcome. I will ask the army to construct a funeral pyre; it will be waiting for the body when you return. As for the extra men you need, we cannot send any of our agents, for Moira will probably have our offices watched, but I will arrange for seven members of the SAS to join your team, explaining to their officer that it is the most dangerous mission they are ever likely to go on."
One hour later and Sir Willoughby Brown confirmed to Rob the exact position where the portal was to be opened, and the time, it was to be at five o`clock the next morning. The Water Cannon, the automatic weapons and the other items on his list, and his team would meet him there.
"Rob, the governments of the three countries that Moira has visited have offered to provide a company of their best troops, if you can use them that is?" Sir Willoughby Brown offered.
"Thank them all for the offers but I really think that the fewer the better, they will only get in the way Sir Richard. Surprise and the Cannon will give us our victory, taking more troops will only see them slaughtered
by Lord Asbaritch or Moira, if either of them escape the initial attack." Rob replied.
"You are probably right Rob." Sir Willoughby Brown replied. "I will be glad when this is all over, and not only for the world, my wife and I are both prisoners in my office to ensure that Moira learns nothing from me, although I did feel a little self-conscious when I used the protection spell in front of her, but at least we are both alive."
Rob smiled when he thought of Sir Willoughby Brown speaking the words of the spell while his wife sprayed the walls with holy water, and he wondered what she had thought about it all.
**********
It was an hour before midnight that Rob and Christina said their tearful goodbyes, for neither knew if he would live through the next few hours, however both of them knew that he had no choice at all but to take on the task, one that would once again take him literally into Hell.
Rob, David and Angela left Lower Boulding for the drive to Salisbury plain and after arriving there, they were escorted to their departure point by a squad of soldiers, and while it was still dark enough to hide their activities. It was then that Rob got his first view of the green Water Cannon, the driver informing him that it carried 9000 litres of water, the water being pumped out at a pressure of 5 bar andcould reach a target up to 65 metres away operating at 2200 litres per minute.
The seven SAS men arrived minutes later and introduced themselves, they were led by Lieutenant Alan Jones and Sergeant John Tucker, none of the men appeared to be in the least worried by their latest mission, but Rob thought that this was probably more to do with their training, for he, David and Angela were all very worried. They had brought with them all the items that Rob had asked for, and they too must have thought that these weapons of war were very strange. Rob and David now began their initial preparations for war.
Their concrete base was a derelict building used by the army for training, it had been swept and washed and was ready for their own peculiar needs, and thankfully it was a dry morning for the building did not have a roof. Upon this flat base David and Rob drew a five-pointed star and enclosed it with a circle; they then covered the circle with blessed salt. The next part of the procedure was to draw the correct mystical signs at the apexes of the star, the signs at each of the points denote the five elements, four are of matter, and they are fire, air, water and earth, the fifth element is not of matter it is of spirit. To finish off the pentagram they set five white candles at the apexes of the star and these they set alight. Finally, they set five goblets in the valleys of the star and they filled the goblets with holy water, the pentagram was now fully charged and ready for use, and with just one hour left to departure time. It was now that they set up the strange statue that David had talked about, one that in some ways resembled the four-armed Indian goddess Kali, but a very demented one carrying a large bowl held above her head. The statue was set in the very middle of the pentagram.
It was under a cloud-filled sky that Rob and his team were shown how to operate the Water Cannon, and when they were all au fait with it, Rob took his team to one side.
"Listen up, our two opponents are quite capable of taking us out without even raising a sweat, the only advantages that we hold are first of all surprise, for they think their domain is impregnable, as it was until we received help from what we can only assume was from the side of the angels." Rob began.
At one time, his opening statement would have produced some raised eyebrows, now they merely nodded acceptance of his statement, even the seven SAS men managed to accept it without comment.
"The second advantage is the Water Cannon, it holds 9000 litres of water that David is about to bless, this is our main weapon, for as with the vampires of Hollywood it also burns demons. Powerful as they are the amount of holy water that we will send their way should protect us and also provide us with our victory. I pray that the holy water, when coupled to the other protections that we will also take with us, will keep us safe while we are away and allow us to return home in one piece." Rob continued.
"Now listen carefully team while I tell you how I hope our mission will go." Rob began and then turned to speak with one of the SAS men, Corporal Miles,
"Corporal you and three of your men will stand guard over the other end of the tunnel that David and I hope to conjure up, you are to protect it against any of the locals, the Shades, who might attempt to travel through it. I have called them Shades after the ancient Greek ghosts; they are small pale ghost-like beings who have been condemned to live in the Netherworld because of the evil they have committed during their mortal lifetime. They cannot be permitted back to Earth, nor any other of the locals, whoever they are." Rob said to the SAS men who were now riveted to his every word in disbelief that any of what he said could ever turn out to be real.
"Your first task will be to use some of the salt that you have in your Land Rover, lay it down in a large arc that encompasses your vehicle and the tunnel, you are to stand within this arc which should keep you safe form the local inhabitants, should they appear. Your best defence against them will be to repeat the Lord`s prayer in a loud voice, this has usually worked in the past, although the creatures can be persistent. If this is the case you can use the holy water in the pressure sprayers against them, but sparingly for we do not know how long this operation is going to take."
Rob now turned to the officer.
Lieutenant, there is no telling where our main opponents will be, I hope to find them in the Great Hall, Lord Asbaritch likes to sit upon his large throne and play the great Lord, however we will have to play it by ear. Our main aim is to find and kill Moira Bourbon, we cannot fail in this, otherwise she will take a terrible revenge on the world for our attempt on her life."
Rob then turned to the sergeant.
"David, Angela and you Sergeant Tucker will make for the upper floor, partly in a search and rescue operation, young Cassie being the damsel in distress. However, your main reason for being up there is to search the floor for Moira Bourbon and then to take her out, if she is not in the Great Hall. The rest of us will initially invade the Great Hall in the Water Cannon, if the enemy is there then that is where the main battle will take place, if not then we will join you in a search of the fortress to find and kill Moira Bourbon. When we are successful our orders are to return her body to Earth to be burned on the funeral pyre that is about to be constructed. As I have just said, we cannot fail in this, as for young Cassie, if we fail to locate her we can always return there and try again. That is it team, anyone who would rather sit this one out please say so now, for once we go through the portal there is no turning back." Rob said hoping that none of his team would chicken out, as it would leave him begging the army for even more men who would be brave and foolhardy enough to accompany him.
"If you and David are willing to go to Hell again, then how can I refuse Rob, this is my world as well as yours." Angela Collins announced with a quiet confidence as to the outcome.
The seven SAS men looked anew at Angela, respect showing upon their faces, and they all announced their intention of going along with the SIS agents, even if most of them thought that it was some sort of prank being played upon them.
**********
Back at Lower Boulding, Simon Markman did not know whether to be happy or annoyed, for having lost the toss of the coin, for it meant that he had to stay behind to guard Christina while she looked after the twins. As for Christina, she was unable to go with Rob as he had insisted that the twins needed her there, for neither of them knew whether things would go right or go horribly wrong, and if she accompanied him, they could lose both of their parents.
**********
It was getting nearer to departure time and David had already begun the preparations that they hoped would protect them against the worst that their enemy could throw at them. With the Water Cannon already full of water, David climbed up to the top of it and began to bless the water in the traditional way, even if it was not traditional to bless a Water Cannon full of water. br />
"Blessed are you, Lord, Almighty God, and blessed is your only son Jesus Christ. As you blessed this salt may you use its holy powers to cleanse and bless this water and also its container. This we beseech of you oh Almighty God, so that we may use it in the eternal fight against evil." David said sprinkling the salt into the water.
He then made the sign of the cross above the water. "We really should use fresh spring water, but once again I am sure that it will be all right." David said to Rob with a weak smile.
Just then the area around the Water Cannon was filled with a bright white light that almost blinded them, then it slowly faded back to normal.
"Err, David, does that normally happen when you bless water, because if so you might have warned me, I nearly fainted in fear." Sergeant John Tucker asked in wonder at what had happened.
"It has happened once before John, but no normally it never happens, the fact that it did gives me added hope." David said brightly.
The soldiers now began to worry, for the chances of it being a prank had just reduced considerably.
"OK David, everything is going well, let's begin the final preparations and then you can light the potion and we will recite the spell." Rob said.
David then began to paint the sign of the cross upon the foreheads of those about to cross over to the Netherworld, using holy water as the paint and Christina`s make up brush. While he did so, he said the same words to each of them. "May almighty God bless you and keep you safe." To which they each replied. "Amen."
He then put a string of garlic upon their heads, which they covered with metal helmets. "Hopefully, this will keep the forces of evil from taking over your mind; make sure that you keep it there, this is not a joke."
Then he gave each of them a glass Phial of mercury and a bottle of blessed salt, all of which they put in their pockets, he finally gave them a wooden cross which he had made at Lower Boulding and these they hung around their necks.