Necromancy for the Greater Good
looking plain again.
“The name 'Frieda' means 'elf.' And now that you're dramatically telling this story, you get scenery effects. It's a glamour. You're trying to hide it, but you can't resist showing off a little bit,” Maryann said.
Frieda blinked a few times, and then tossed her head haughtily. The wind and sunlight caught the free tendrils causing them to shine gold. “You've caught on. I don't know how.”
“Athena said you weren't what you seem,” Maryann said. “Why would an elf be here?”
“To study our history,” Leah offered.
“Yes! I told you the truth,” she said, her eyes bright again. “I am here to study. I want to study your history. But your world moves at a much faster pace than mine. We would have barely scratched the surface of any one topic in my time here, yet you demand mastery in only a few short months. I knew your world moved at an accelerated pace, but this is simply overwhelming.” Her voice had turned slightly musical.
“I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. Do you have to return home after you graduate?”
“No, I don't suppose so. Frankly, everyone would be quite shocked if I returned home so very early,” Frieda asked. “But after I graduate, what else is there to do?”
“If you're serious about studying, you can stay in school for a long, long time,” Leah said.
“How so? I have funds sufficient for a diploma but I can't pay for study indefinitely.”
“This is what graduate programs are for. You can get your bachelor's, and then your master's, and then your PhD. That'll take up to ten years right there. Then you go on to a post-doc which could be another two to three, then to an adjunct position, and finally try to find your own teaching position at any university. You will, of course, be expected to teach, but most importantly you'll be expected to publish. And if you want to publish, you'll need to keep learning.”
Her eyes were really starting to shine. “Is this true? I could stay in school for years, and I would get paid for it?”
“Well, you won't get paid very much for it,” Maryann said. “But you don't look like you care too much for material things anyway.”
“And you can apply for grants and scholarships which will help,” Leah said.
“I had no idea this was an option! I know of course the professors here had to learn how to be teachers, but I didn't realize they were also paid to be scholars. This is most wonderful news!” Frieda looked almost pretty.
“But everything is still going to move fast,” Leah said. “Once you get your first degree, you'll be able to focus more on the subjects you want, but this is how a human university works.”
“Yes. Your world is in a great hurry and it knows not its destination.”
“If you do get in trouble, you should talk to the counselors anyway,” Maryann said. “They may surprise you with some good study tips and strategies.”
“Yes, I suppose it couldn't hurt. Thank you! You have given me new energy and direction for my studies,” Frieda said.
“You're quite welcome. If it doesn't offend your religion, you may want to leave something for Athena.”
“Yes, that would be wise.” Frieda picked up her satchel and stood up. “Thank you again.”
“And don't forget, we have a band,” Leah said.
“Oh, I have no time to study music along with history,” she replied, and dashed off towards the Thomas Great Hall.
“Well, that figures. Help a gal out, and get nothing in return. Do you think that's good enough for Athena?”
“I hope so,” Maryann said as they starting walking. Along the way, she saw movement out of the corner of her eye in a tree. She turned to look and saw a small owl sitting on a branch, fully awake even though it was morning. It blinked its great eyes at her just once. “Yes, I think Athena is satisfied,” she said.
“If you say so,” Leah replied dryly.
They rejoined the other two and updated them as soon as they could.
“Is it a good idea to leave my sister with an elf as a roommate?” Nora asked. “Elves and fairies in stories are not very nice.”
“Elves are a lot like people. Generally they aren't good or bad; it's their motivations that matter,” Maryann said.
“I think stealing children is bad.”
“Well, their motivations certainly aren't human motivations,” Maryann conceded. “And they are notorious for being liars, or at least using glamour and illusions.”
“That isn't making me feel better about my sister.”
“But if she wants to study, and is serious about it, I think this is a good place for her.”
“True. Academia is a refuge for any number of socially awkward people. Why not a scholarly elf?” Leah asked.
“As long as she delights in the truth, I think she'll be fine,” Maryann said.
“All the same, I'll suggest to Sharon to be nice to Frieda,” Nora said. “And I'll make sure I send her an antique horseshoe, you know, for good luck. And cold iron.”
“I think that would be a wise idea,” Isabella replied.
The Lyrics:
So I arrived at college,
Fresh and clean and bright,
Little did I know
My roommate’s up all night
She won't go to sleep
Then she won't get up
Her alarm rings in my ears
Then she skips class anyway
Refrain: If she only knew I’m secretly a drow
She would fear me and my evil ways
But if she found out it wouldn't help her now
I will sacrifice her soul to my dark god
I met a human boy who was cute
Whenever he was around I became mute
But oh could she talk and talk
And she talked him into dating her
She invites him over all the time
They talk and make out and get drunk
And when it's time for me to try to sleep
They bump and grind on the upper bunk
Refrain
She doesn't study and she doesn't care
She parties all night and stumbles in late
I wake to the sound of her retching
How does she pass in that mental state?
I just want to focus and study
I just want some time alone
But she's always in the room
And always talking on the phone
Refrain
It's only a matter of time
I only have to wait
Once the semester ends
My roommate will meet her fate
Refrain x2
Track 4: Pet Rattlesnake
The Interview:
Brad: Not that I intended this interview to go track by track, but I have to say each song seems so different it seems worthwhile to do that.
Lenore: Whatever works for you.
Brad: Your number 4 track, “Pet Rattlesnake,” is, well, a country song. It's not even a country-pop song, but more of an older country-western style reminiscent of Johnny Cash or the Outlaws.
Lee: Yes. Was that supposed to be a secret?
Brad: No, but it's certainly a surprise. I know I didn't expect it.
Lee: That's why made sure to note the style change in the liner notes.
Brad: [laughs] That was nice. So, what in the world made you decide to record a country-western song?
Belle: Our agent, Mr. Bert Rafel.
Brad: Is he a fan?
Lenore: No, it's just not real picky about where he books our gigs sometimes. So we ended up in the middle of a small town in the deep South and realized we were about to go on stage playing the wrong music.
Lee: A la “Bob's Country Bunkhouse.”
Anna: Don't get us wrong, Mr. Rafel gets us the gigs, but, well, he really should do a bit more research beforehand.
Brad: Well, it seemed to work out for you. “Pet Rattlesnake” made the Country Billboard chart. It also
credits a Mr. Billy Ray Nickel. Who is that?
Belle: A very talented country-western singer who never quite made it.
Brad: That puts this song in a whole new light.
Lee: We really aren't as frivolous as we pretend to be.
Brad: [laughs] I can see you Ravens are determined to defy expectations.
The Flashback:
“Are you sure we're going the right way?” Maryann asked worriedly. “I haven't even seen a gas station since we turned off the state highway.”
“I'm following the GPS,” Isabella said, glancing at the portable global positioning system stuck on the front windshield.
“Where in the hell did Mr. Rafel book us this time?” Nora said irritably.
“The middle of nowhere, clearly,” Leah replied. “Does anyone else feel like we're in some kind of horror movie and just made the wrong turn?”
“Yes,” the others agreed.
“And the GPS just lost all the roads,” Isabella sighed as the screen turned green.
“Well, if we end up in a horror movie, Nora’s getting killed first.”
“Why?” Nora snapped.
“You're black and I run faster.”
She looked like she was about to make an angry retort, but then she nodded. “That's true. But it doesn't matter if I go first, because if we're in a horror movie, you're still getting killed. You’re a token minority, and you’re the comedienne. That's two strikes against you.”
“True, true. My spicy Latina nature and sense of humor all but guarantees my untimely death at the hands of the killer in the woods.”
“Can we please stop talking like that?” Maryann asked with a nervous giggle.
“Nora, please pull out the directions,” Isabella asked. She continued to navigate the band's van through the thickly wooded southern countryside. Finally they turned off the country route onto a gravel road, which went through a mid-sized town that had clearly seen better days. “This is it. Peach Falls.”
“This is it? There