The Decameron (Day 6 to Day 10)

  _Two neere dwelling Neighbours, the one beeing named_ SpinelloccioTavena, _and the other_ Zeppa di Mino, _frequenting each others companydaily together;_ Spinelloccio _Cuckolded his Friend and Neighbour.Which happening to the knowledge of_ Zeppa, _he prevailed so well withthe Wife of_ Spinelloccio, _that he being lockt up in a Chest, herevenged his wrong at that instant, so that neither of them complainedof his misfortune._

  The Eight Novell.

  _Wherein is approved, that he which offereth shame and disgrace to hisNeighbour; may receive the like injury (if not in worse manner) by thesame man._

  Greevous, and full of compassion, appeared the hard Fortunes of Madame_Helena_ to be, having much discontented, and (well-neere) wearied allthe Ladies in hearing them recounted. But because they were very justlyinflicted upon her, and according as (in equity) shee had deserved,they were the more moderate in their commisseration: howbeit, theyreputed the Scholler not onely over-obstinate, but also too strict,rigorous and severe. Wherefore, when Madame _Pampinea_ had finished hirNovell, the Queene gave command to Madame _Fiammetta_, that she shouldfollow next with her discourse; whereto shee shewing obedience, thusbeganne.

  Because it appeareth in my judgement (faire Ladyes) that the Schollerscruelty hath much displeased you, making you more melancholly thenthis time requireth: I holde it therefore very convenient, that yourcontristed spirits should be chearfully revived, with matter morepleasing and delightfull. And therefore, I mean to report a Novell of acertaine man, who tooke an injury done him, in much milder manner, andrevenged his wrong more moderately, then the furious incensed Schollerdid. Whereby you may comprehend, that it is sufficient for any man, andso he ought to esteeme it, to serve another with the same sawce, whichthe offending party caused him first to taste of: without coveting anystricter revenge, then agreeth with the quality of the injury received.

  Know then (Gracious assembly) that, as I have heretofore heard, therelived not long since in _Sienna_, two young men, of honest parentageand equall condition, neither of the best, nor yet the meanest callingin the City: the one being named _Spinelloccio Tavena_, and the othertearmed _Zeppa di Mino_, their houses Neighbouring together in thestreete _Camollia_. Seldome the one walked abroade without the othersCompany, and their houses allowed equall welcome to them both; so thatby outward demonstrations, & inward mutuall affection, as far as humanecapacity had power to extend, they lived and loved like two Brethren,they both beeing wealthy, and married unto two beautifull women.

  It came to passe, that _Spinelloccio_, by often resorting to thehouse of _Zeppa_, as well in his absence, as when he abode at home;beganne to glance amorous looks on _Zeppaes_ wife, and pursued hisunneighbourly purpose in such sort: that hee being the strongerperswader, and she (belike) too credulous in beleeving, or elseover-feeble in resisting; from private imparlance, they fell to action;and continued their close fight a long while together, unseene andwithout suspition, no doubt to their equall joy and contentment.

  But, whether as a just punishment, for breaking so loving a league offriendship and neighbour-hood, or rather a fatall infliction, evermoreattending on the closest Cuckoldry, their felicity still continuingin this kinde: it fortuned on a day, _Zeppa_ abiding within doors,contrary to the knowledge of his wife, _Spinelloccio_ came to enquirefor him, and she answering (as she verily supposed) that he was gonabroad: uppe they went both together into the Hall, and nobodiebeing there to hinder what they intended, they fell to their wontedrecreation without any feare, kissing and embracing as Lovers use to do.

  _Zeppa_ seeing all this, spake not one word, neither made any noise atall; but kept himselfe closely hidden, to observe the yssue of thisamorous conflict. To be briefe, he saw _Spinelloccio_ goe with his wifeinto the Chamber, and make the doore fast after them, whereat he couldhave beene angry, which he held to be no part of true wisedome. For heknew well enough, that to make an out crie in this case, or otherwiseto reveale this kinde of injury, it could no way make it lesse, butrather give a greater addition of shame and scandall: he thought thisno course for him to take; wiser considerations entred his braine, tohave this wrong fully revenged, yet with such a discreete and orderlycarriage, as no neighbours knowledge should by any meanes apprehend it,or the least signe of discontent in himselfe blabbe it, because theywere two daungerous evils.

  Many notable courses wheeled about his conceit, every one promisingfairely, and ministring meanes of formall apparance, yet one (abovethe rest) wonne his absolute allowance, which he intended to prosecuteas best he might. In which resolution, he kept still very close, solong as _Spinelloccio_ was with his Wife; but hee being gone, he wentinto the Chamber, where he found his wife, amending the forme of herhead attyre, which _Spinelloccio_ had put into a disordred fashion.Wife (quoth he) what art thou doing? Why? Do you not see Husband?answered she. Yes that I do wife, replied _Zeppa_, and something elsehappened to my sight, which I could wish that I had not seene. RougherLanguage growing betweene them, of his avouching, and her as stoutdenying, with defending her cause over-weakely, against the manifestproofes both of eye and eare; at last she fell on her knees beforehim, weeping incessantly, and no excuses now availing, she confest herlong acquaintance with _Spinelloccio_, and most humbly entreated himto forgive her. Uppon the which penitent confession and submission,_Zeppa_ thus answered.

  Wife, if inward contrition be answerable to thy outward seeming sorrow,then I make no doubt, but faithfully thou dost acknowledge thine owneevill dooing: for which, if thou expectest pardon of me; determinethen to fulfill effectually, such a busines as I must enjoyne, andthou performe. I command thee to tell _Spinelloccio_, that to morrowmorning, about nine of the clocke, we being both abroad walking, hemust finde some apt occasion to leave my company, and then come hitherto visit thee. When he is here, sodainly will I returne home; and uponthy hearing of my entraunce: to save his owne credite, and thee fromdetection, thou shalt require him to enter this Chest, untill such timeas I am gone forth againe; which he doing, for both your safeties, sosoon as he is in the chest, take the key and locke him up fast. Whenthou hast effected this, then shall I acquaint thee with the restremaining, which also must be done by thee, without dread of the leastharme to him or thee, because there is no malicious meaning in me, butsuch as (I am perswaded) thou canst not justly mislike. The wife, tomake some satisfaction for her offence committed, promised that shewould performe it, and so she did.

  On the morrow morning, the houre of nine being come, when _Zeppa_and _Spinelloccio_ were walking abroad together, _Spinelloccio_remembring his promise unto his Mistresse, and the clocke telling himthe appointed houre, hee saide to _Zeppa_. I am to dine this day withan especiall friend of mine, who I would be loath should tarry for mycomming; and therefore holde my departure excused. How now? answered_Zeppa_, the time for dinner is yet farre enough off, wherefore thenshould we part so soone? Yea but _Zeppa_, replied _Spinelloccio_, weehave weighty matters to confer on before dinner, which will requirethree houres space at the least, and therefore it behoveth me torespect due time.

  _Spinelloccio_ being departed from Zeppa (who followed faire and softlyafter him) being come to the house, and kindly welcommed by the wife:they were no sooner gone up the staires, and entering in at the Chamberdoore; but the Woman heard her Husband cough, and also his comming upthe staires. Alas deare _Spinelloccio_ (quoth she) what shall we do? MyHusband is comming uppe, and we shall be both taken tardie, step intothis Chest, lye downe there and stirre not, till I have sent him forthagaine, which shall be within a very short while. _Spinelloccio_ wasnot a little joyfull for her good advice; downe in the Chest lay he,and she lockt him in: by which time _Zeppa_ was entred the Chamber.Where are you Wife? said he, (speaking so loud, as hee in the Chestmight heare him) What, is it time to go to dinner? It will be anon Sir,answered she, as yet it is overearly; but seeing you are come, the morehast shall be made, and every thing will be ready quickly.

  _Zeppa_, sitting downe upon the Chest, wherein _Spinelloccio_ lay not alittle affrighted, speaking still aloud
, as formerly he did: Come hitherWife (quoth he) how shall we do for some good companie to dine withus? Mine honest kinde neighbour _Spinelloccio_ is not at home, becausehe dineth forth to day with a deare friend of his, by which meanes,his wife is left at home alone: give her a call out at our Window, anddesire her to come dine with us: for we two can make no merry Musicke,except some more come to fill up the consort.

  His Wife being very timorous, yet diligent to doe whatsoever hecommanded, so prevailed with the Wife of _Spinelloccio_: that she cameto them quickely, and so much the rather, because her Husband dinedabroad. Shee being come up into the Chamber, _Zeppa_ gave her mostkinde entertainment, taking her gently by the hand, and winking on hisWife, that she should betake her selfe to the kitchin, to see dinnerspeedily prepared, while he sat conversing with his neighbour in theChamber.

  His wife being gone, he shut the doore after her, which the new-comeNeighbour perceyving, she sayde. Our blessed Lady defend me. _Zeppa_,What is your meaning in this? Have you caused me to come hither tothis intent? Is this the love you beare to _Spinelloccio_, and yourprofessed loyalty in friendshippe? _Zeppa_, seating her downe on theChest, wherein her Husband was inclosed, entreating her patience, thusbegan. Kinde and loving Neighbour, before you adventure too farre inanger, vouchsafe to heare what I shall tell you.

  I have loved, and still doe love, _Spinelloccio_ as my brother, butyesterday (albeit he knoweth it not) I found, the honest trust Ireposed in him, deserved no other, or better recompence, but even to bebold with my wife, in the selfesame manner as I am, and as hee oughtto do with none but you. Now, in regard of the love which I beare him,I intend to be no otherwise revenged on him, but in the same kinde asthe offence was committed. He hath bin more then familiar with my wife,I must borrow the selfe-same courtesie of you, which in equity youcannot deny mee, weighing the wrong you have sustained by my wife. Ourinjuries are alike, in your Husband to me, and in my wife to you: letthen their punishment and ours be alike also, as they, so we; for inthis case there can be no juster revenge.

  The Woman hearing this, and perceiving the manifolde confirmationsthereof, protested (on solemne oath) by _Zeppa_; hir beliefe grewsetled, and thus she answered. My loving neighbour** _Zeppa_, seeing thiskinde of revenge is (in meere justice) imposed on mee, and ordained asa due scourge, as well to the breach of friendship and neighbour-hood,as abuse of his true and loyall wife: I am the more willing to consent:alwaies provided, that it be no imbarrement of love betweene your wifeand mee, albeit I have good reason to alledge, that she began thequarrell first: and what I do is but to right my wrong, as any otherwoman of spirit would do: Afterwards, we may the more easily pardon oneanother. For breach of peace (answered _Zeppa_) between my wife andyou, take my honest word for your warrant. Moreover, in requitall ofthis favour to mee, I will bestowe a deare and precious Jewell on you,excelling all the rest which you have beside.

  In delivering these words, he sweetly kissed and embraced her, asshe sat on the Chest wherein her husband lay: now, what they didelse beside, in recompence of the wrong received, I leave to yourimagination, as rather deserving silence, then immodest blabbing._Spinelloccio_, being all this while in the Chest, hearing easily allthe words which _Zeppa_ had uttered, the answer of his wife, as alsowhat Musicke they made over his head: you may guesse in what a casehe was, his heart being ready to split with rage, and, but that heestood in feare of _Zeppa_, he would have railde and exclaimed on hiswife, as thus hee lay shut up in the Chest. But entering into betterconsideration, that so great an injury was first begun by himselfe, &_Zeppa_ did no more, then in reason and equity he might well do (havingevermore carried himselfe like a kinde neighbour and frend towards him,without the least offer of distaste) he faithfully resolved, to be afirmer friend to _Zeppa_ then formerly hee had bin, if it might beembraced and accepted on the other side.

  Delights and pleasures, be they never so long in contenting andcontinuance, yet they come to a period and conclusion at last: So_Zeppa_, having ended his amorous combate, and over the head ofhis perfidious friend, thought himselfe sufficiently revenged. Butnow, in consideration of a further promise made on the bargaine;_Spinelloccioes_ wife challengeth the Jewell, then which kind ofrecompence, nothing can be more welcome to women. Heereupon, _Zeppa_calling for his owne wife, commanded her to open the Chest; which sheedid, and he merrily smiling, saide. Well wife, you have given meea Cake insted of bread, and you shall lose nothing for your labour.So _Spinelloccio_ comming forth of the Chest, it requireth a betterwitte then mine, to tell you, which of them stood most confounded withshame, either _Spinelloccio_ seeing _Zeppa_, and knowing well enoughwhat he had done: or the woman beholding her husband, who easily heardall their familiar conference, and the action thereupon so deservedlyperformed.

  See neighbour, is not this your dearest Jewell? Having kept it awhilein my wives custody; according to my promise, here I deliver it you._Spinelloccio_ being glad of his deliverance out of the Chest, albeitnot a little ashamed of himselfe; without using many impertinentwords, saide. _Zeppa_, our wrongs are equally requited on each other,and therefore I allow thy former speeches to my Wife, that thou wastmy friend, as I am the like to thee, and so I pray thee let us stillcontinue. For nothing else is now to bee divided betweene us, seeingwe have shared alike in our wives, which none knowing but our selves,let it be as closely kept to our selves. _Zeppa_ was wel pleased withthe motion, and so all foure dined lovingly together, without anyvariance or discontentment. And thence forward, each of the Women hadtwo Husbands, as either Husband enjoyed two Wives, without furthercontention or debate.