Who Will Bail Us Out?
(Curtains fall)
Scene 3
NNEKA
(Talking to herself) Where else can I find these boys? I wonder where they could have gone to this early this morning? Ohh! I am beginning to hate this whole thing. And the worst is that I have not even eaten… Besides, what is this very thing that is so important this man wants to tell us…?
HENRY
(Raising his voice) Hey! Come here! This girl! Hey you come here! Nneka! Nneka!
(Nneka turns and sees him.)
NNEKA
(Sighs) I said it! Chiemeka I should have known that you will be here. Of course you drunkard master. I know you have no shame. Chiemeka, my brother, please I'm begging you, have mercy on yourself! Just take a look… around you, the way this whole place is reeking of cigarette smoke and alcohol. Okay. I know you are now into smoking but I’m not surprised.
I know you so I don't even need to be told that you must've thrown your stick away before calling me so that I will not see it and tell papa huh? Alright! Congratulations! But I am just so sorry for you. Today it’s cigarette. Tomorrow, who knows, you might graduate into igbo.7 Ha! Can you imagine? This early morning you have already comfortably settled down in this drinking bar to drink yourself to stupor as usual.
HENRY
Now hold it there, will you! Nneka, I hope you know I will not take that insult from you—today, okay?! (Hisses) I didn’t call you here to start insulting me in front of these guys, I hope you know that?! Did you see me smoking? Or are you just looking for something to gossip about me with your Papa?
By the way, even if I was smoking, how is that your business? You must be careful how you talk to me because I am your senior with at least two good years, okay? And one more thing, I don’t know how many times I will have to warn you to stop calling me Chiemeka? I’ve told you I don’t like that name? My name is Henry! Henry the Eight! Do you hear me?!
NNEKA
Ok sir! Henry the Eight or whatever you call yourself… I don’t care! By the way where is Edu your brother?
HENRY
(Scoffs) Which brother? Please tell me, do I have a brother? Hmm… okay, maybe I do but I can’t remember since when it became my duty to be my brother’s keeper. Please my friend will you stop asking me all these questions and just tell me why you are acting like this… this hasty… this morning. If you don’t have any meaningful thing to say, please just go and let me be so that I can finish this my drink in peace. After all there is no law that says I cannot drink whenever I want.
NNEKA
You forgot to mention smoking too. Please Chieme—ka… okay, okay, okay, sorry, Henry, please it is very important. Please tell me where can I find him?
HENRY
Hmm! What’s all this all about? What has Edu done that the whole world is coming after him as if he's Osama?
NNEKA
Henry the problem with you is that you never know when something is serious. Please for crying out loud, papa wants you and Edu to come home now.
HENRY
What! No way! You mean I should leave this my pammy8 and follow you home just like that?! Ha! Tell me something…
NNEKA
Please. Please. Biko9. Okay, if you know where he is, just tell me or better still, call him so that we can go and answer papa’s call.
HENRY
Wait… this papa’s call, what is it all about?
NNEKA
Search me! Papa just woke up this morning. None of you were at home because due to some reasons I cannot fathom save for that very curse I mentioned, you guys cannot stay in your own house even if it’s for one minute! He woke up this morning and told me to go and call of all of you including mama. Mama is already on her way home. He says there’s this thing he wants to tell us. I don’t know what it is but what I know is that my ear is scratching me already and I can’t wait any longer so please let’s hurry and go and hear him out. So please, where is Edu?
HENRY
(Hisses) Is that all? So because the old man wants to tell us something that’s why I cannot finish this my drink eh?
NNEKA
It’s not that. Okay, it’s just that the way papa really sounded this morning I have a feeling that something, something bad is in the offing.
HENRY
How did he sound? Nneka relax. In fact, come and take one cup of pammy so that you can relax your brain completely this morning. I think you need it.
NNEKA
(Hisses and raises her voice) Please Chiemeka let’s go now! Where is this Edu? Where on earth is this boy now for Christ sake?
HENRY
Please stop disturbing the peace around here! If you want to find Edu why don’t you go to that place where I expect you should already know by now he must be?
NNEKA
Where exactly, please?
HENRY
Hmm… So you mean you’ve not even checked him out at Chioma’s place? And you are coming here to disturb my peace?
NNEKA
Chioma? This early morning…? Hmm… what could he be doing in that girl’s place by this time of the day? I know I said it before although I was in doubts then, but now I am so certain the two of you must be under some terrible curse, seriously!
HENRY
Are you asking me? What do you think he could be doing there? By the way, it is you that is under some curse!
NNEKA
Are you not his elder brother? You are the one showing him the way and teaching him all the bad things he ever knows and I know he’s beginning to follow your footsteps.
HENRY
Nneka, last warning! Watch what you say to me and be careful how you address me! By the way, why are you questioning what Edu is doing at Chioma’s place? Look, have I ever questioned what your business with Ikenna is?!
NNEKA
I know that is exactly what you will say…
HENRY
Of course! See, don’t you ever think we all are blind because even if all of them are blind, I am definitely not. And I want you to know that I am always watching you.
NNEKA
And who is watching you, if I may ask?
HENRY
It doesn’t matter. After all you are a girl and I’m a guy. Let me tell you one thing, so far, your only luck is that I like that boy Ikenna. If not… if not… I’d...I’d have…
NNEKA
(Hisses) Henry please let’s talk about something that is more important. Papa is waiting for us, please. Let’s just start going to Chioma’s place to call…
HENRY
And what will happen to this my drink?
NNEKA
Please Chiemeka Eight or whatever you call yourself, please I am begging you in the name of God, forget this drink! I will buy you two cups of pammy later. Please let us just go—now!
HENRY
Oh that's my girl! Now you are talking! You can now see why I keep on saying you are my one and only sister…
NNEKA
(Sighs) Ohh… Henry! Let's go!
HENRY
Alright, alright, alright, let’s just start going before you change your mind. But what if Edu is not there...have you thought of where else you can find him?
NNEKA
That's true. In short, I think we better call him on the phone to know his exact location.
HENRY
Then call him now on your phone while I rush over this drink. I don’t think I have airtime credit on my phone.
NNEKA
(Hisses) Is there any time you will ever have airtime credit on your phone? But when it comes to calling all those your small small girls, you will always have credit, for sure!
HENRY
You’ve started again, huh?
(Nneka brings out the phone and dials Edu’s number. Then she listens for the ringing tone at the other end.)
NNEKA
This network sef! The number you are calling is not available, please try again later. Can you imagine that? Gosh, they are not even ashamed! Same old story everyday! A
nyway let me try again like they said. Wait… I think it is now going now, it's ringing…
EDU
(Speaking on the phone at the other end) Hello…? Nneka…? Nneka can you hear me? What is it… Nneka…?
NNEKA
Edu where are you?
EDU
I’m at home. Where are you? Papa said you went to call mama and Henry. Mama is at home now. Have you seen Henry?
NNEKA
Oh yes. I’m with him right now. We are coming home right now.
EDU
OK, that’s good. Papa says there is this very important thing that he wants to tell us. Please hurry home so that we can hear him out.
NNEKA
That’s true. See you when we get home. Bye.
(Curtains fall)