Forsaken

  I shut my eyes. "I feel like I came from someplace else, and maybe that's why I'm always so confused all the time. Maybe those burial places you guys talk about really do exist, and I lived there once." I open my eyes and stare up at the cloudy sky. "I don't know why the sky would be blue there and red everywhere else."

  "There could be a lot of reasons for that. Maybe it wasn't the sky you saw, but a screen."

  "What's a screen?"

  I feel him shift beside me, his hands never leaving my head.

  "We've found them in a couple of channels," he explains. "The wardens use them to give the illusion that the cells look like someplace else, mostly to mess with the minds of the Nameless. It's their twisted way of making them feel like they're going crazy. Still, those screens are really small, and the wardens usually use them to display horrible things. I've never seen one as big as the sky. And I didn't notice one in your cell or anywhere else in that section of channels."

  "It's not just the sky," I say. "Sometimes, I dream of quiet streets and old buildings and trees and grass and flowers and dirt roads. I'm wearing these long dresses, and people around me are dressed differently, too."

  "I wish I had some answers to give you, but I don't. Maybe Reece can get to the bottom of it when we get back to the station. He can hook you up to Oblivion and see what's going on inside your head." His fingertip sketches along my hairline. "How are you right now? I tried to fill your thoughts with the cloudy sky and the lightning you told me about. I don't really know what they look like, so I hope I got it right."

  I manage a small smile. "You did. It's so much like the place I pictured when I was trapped."

  "Good," he says with a drop of relief.

  "How long will I see the sky before I return to reality?"

  "It all depends. Normally, the poison can take several hours to wear off, but with you, it might not take as long."

  "Why would it take less time for me?" I ask then immediately want to retract my question. Deep down, I think I may already know the answer--because I have Grim blood in me and heal more quickly. But does Blaise know?

  "Allura, your hands are completely healed and scarred over when, only twenty-four hours ago, they were scraped raw." He pauses. "Then there was your shoulder. I know it was dislocated, but now it's fine. And I'm pretty sure you cut your head on that shelf, but the wound healed before Mable could even get stitches in it."

  My breathing turns ragged. Blaise has always known I'm a little different, but does he know about my blood? Will he ask me if I know what I am? How will I answer?

  As if tuning in to my panic, the lightning picks up, blazing across the sky like a firework show.

  "You need to calm down," he advises. "Or I won't be able to control where your mind goes."

  "I'm trying," I croak between breaths.

  His warm fingers spread across my cheeks. "Look, I know you're different. I've always sort of known. But it's not a bad thing. And ... I get it."

  His words calm me down, and I breathe evenly again.

  Reece and Ryder have mentioned Blaise is different. Maybe he understands what I'm going through.

  "How are you doing this to me?" I whisper. "How are you keeping me out of my nightmares and letting me see this sky?"

  "It's complicated."

  "But it's because you're different?"

  He takes a couple of breaths. "Yeah, because I'm different."

  "Are you ...? Are you human?"

  "Yes and no." A drop of rawness slips into his tone. "But you don't need to be afraid of me."

  "I'm not afraid of you," I reply. How could I be afraid of him when I'm lying here under the cloudy sky that he somehow created in my head? "One day, will you explain what you are?"

  "One day," he says, but I can't tell if he means it or not.

  Deciding to drop the subject for now, I fold my arms across my stomach and gaze up at the sky. "So, now what do we do?"

  "We wait for the poison to wear off."

  "Then what?" A thought strikes me hard, like a kick to the gut. "Wait? Where are Ryder and Reece?"

  "In the tents probably."

  "What are they doing up there?"

  "You probably don't want to know."

  "Oh." My gut coils into knots, nausea setting in. "They told me to watch out for them, and I didn't. Whatever happens to them ... It's my fault."

  He sighs. "It's not your fault. You were pretty much unconscious when you were brought here."

  "But Ryder and Reece gave me the last shot of Shade, and I wasted it." I frown. "I never should've let that queen--or whatever she is--shoot me."

  "The queen?"

  "Yeah, the woman the Forsaken kept calling 'your highness.' "

  "Oh." His confusion leaves his tone. "That's the Forsaken's leader."

  "Yeah, like their queen." A bolt of lightning flashes right above me, so close I can feel the electricity flowing off it. "But she wasn't wearing a crown."

  "Hmmm ... I think this might be one of those things that you remember that we don't."

  "Oh." How many times is this going to happen? How many things do I remember that no longer exist? Will every revelation be disappointing?

  I sink into the quiet, listening to the thunder grumble as Blaise restlessly shifts around. Every once in a while, his fingers tremble, and I find myself reaching up, wanting to comfort him. When my fingertips brush his scruffy jawline, he sucks in a sharp breath, and the tension pouring off him nearly doubles.

  Confusion and curiosity swirl through me. Why does he still seem somewhat tense around me?

  "Blaise, can I ask you a question?"

  "I ... I guess so."

  "Why were you afraid of me when we first met?"

  "I wasn't," he lies.

  I trace my fingers from his jaw to his lips and graze my fingers along the metal piercings. "When you carried me through the scanner, it seemed like you were. I could feel your heart pounding."

  "I was worried we weren't going to make it out alive," he chokes. "Allura, what are you doing?"

  I absentmindedly graze my fingers back and forth across his lips. They're so soft. "Huh?"

  "With your fingers ... and the touching ...?" He's breathing so ravenously he's practically panting.

  "I'm sorry." I lower my hand. "I don't know why I did that. You just seemed upset, and I was trying to comfort you." I feel ridiculously clueless about everything. Why can't I comfort them like they comfort me?

  "You're fine." He sounds more at ease now that my hands aren't pawing at his mouth. "I just have a problem with being touched. It has nothing to do with you, though."

  "Oh." Why? I wonder. But I don't think he wants to talk about it, so I don't ask.

  "Where's your mind right now?" He changes the subject. "Are you still under that grey sky?"

  I nod. "It smells really good here, like rain and fresh grass."

  "Rain? Like water from the sky?"

  "Yeah ... Please tell me it rains here."

  "I've heard of rain, but I've never seen it. It doesn't happen very often."

  I crinkle my nose. Hardly any rain. No blue sky. No grass. No trees. No nature. What a sad place the world is.

  "Hold still for a minute," he mumbles. "Let me see what I can do."

  I don't know what he means, but I remain perfectly still, anyway.

  His fingers move, his fingertips tickling along my hairline. A soft hum fills my head, and I close my eyes and spread my arms out to the side, relaxing in the dirt. I'm so comfortable right now I could probably fall asleep.

  "See anything yet?"

  "No, but I feel--"

  A droplet of water splatters across my forehead. My eyelids snap open right as another raindrop lands on my cheek. A smile graces my lips as another one splashes against my neck and rolls down my collarbone.

  "Is it working?" he asks.

  "Yes." I beam from ear to ear then open my mouth and catch a few raindrops on my tongue.

  "You look so funny right now," he rema
rks, his tone lighter than it was moments ago.

  Giggling, I stick out my tongue and lap up more raindrops. I hear the quietest laugh escape him. I don't think I've ever heard Blaise laugh. I wish I could see what he looks like with his eyes lit up and his lips curved into a smile.

  "I feel bad," I admit after the rain dwindles to a drizzle.

  "Why's that? Is it the dream? Because I can change it if you need me to."

  "No, it's not that." I tuck my arm behind my head. "It's just that I'm lying here, laughing, while Reece and Ryder probably aren't. Or maybe they are. They were laughing the last time I saw them and crying."

  "The poison does that." He must be close to me, because his breath tickles my cheek when he speaks. "You were doing it, too, when they put you in here. At first, I thought you just breathed in the smoke, but then I saw the spot on your neck and guessed they shot you with a dart."

  I move my hand to the back of my neck. "I thought she shot me with a gun. With everything you guys told me about the Forsaken, I figured I was dead."

  "We all should be," he says bluntly. "I don't know why we're not. I think the Forsaken might have something planned. I heard a couple of them mention some sort of sacrifice, and I'm pretty sure they have more prisoners here than just us."

  "I heard someone mention the same thing. Does that mean they're going to kill us eventually?"

  "They may think they are, but they're not. I'm going to get us out of here." His confidence makes me almost believe him. "How did you guys even get captured? I thought you were staying in the caves." He says the caves with so much repulsion.

  "We were, but something happened, and we had to leave." I wrestle back the images I saw through Lex's eyes. "Reece and Ryder thought we'd be okay because the sun was down, but then the Forsaken showed up. It was almost like they were waiting for us to step out of the cave so they could attack."

  "They probably were," he says with bitterness. "They hate those caves. And they have every reason to."

  "I know." I press my fingertips to my temple as my head pounds. "Ryder told me about the spirits. We think one of them--Lex--entered me. I saw all these things--his thoughts--and I--"

  "What!" he shouts, his fingers shaking. "One of those disgusting creatures took over your mind?"

  The sky trembles, casting multiple bolts of lightning across the clouds.

  "Blaise, calm down. The sky--"

  An alarming sound cuts me off, like air getting sucked through a vent. The ground begins to tremor, the grass and dirt caving in around me. I spring to my feet and search the area for a Tracker, but I can't spot one. My gaze impulsively travels upward, and my next breath gets lodged in my throat.

  The grey sky has darkened to charcoal, and the clouds have solidified into funnels that gyrate and expand as they reach toward the ground.

  "Blaise ..." My voice gets sucked away as a blast of wind nails me from behind.

  Tornadoes. The word sears into my mind as my body flies through the air, straight toward the funnel of clouds.

  "Allura!" Blaise sounds so far away.

  "I'm right--" A tree collides with my body, and I go sailing sideways away from the tornadoes.

  My body spins out of control, and I soar toward a forest in the distance. Not wanting to get hit by more trees, I spread my arms and legs out and try to change directions. But the wind kicks up and forces me forward, right toward a massive tree. With how fast I'm going, the impact will probably break every one of my bones. The only comfort I have is knowing I'll probably heal--well, hopefully. Since my ability is new and untested, I don't know if there are limitations.

  I close my eyes and attempt to prepare myself for the pain. Blaise's face flashes through my mind, and I hang onto the image. I wish he were here with me. Or better yet, I wish I were there with him.

  As if my wish comes true, strong arms enclose around me and a solid chest presses against my cheek. Even though I have no clue who this person is, I clutch the front of their shirt.

  They fling their weight to the right, and I feel myself shifting directions. Moments later, the wind dies down, and I slowly descend until my feet touch the ground.

  "The poison wore off." I breathe in relief. "Thank God."

  "No," Blaise says, and my eyes pop open.

  I tip my chin up and meet his gaze. He isn't looking at me, but at something behind me. I twist around and then my jaw nearly smacks the ground.

  I didn't return to reality. Blaise entered my dream.

  Chapter Ten

  Monster

  Blaise gapes at the torn up field, the demolished trees, and the rolling mountains that stretch as far as the eye can see.

  "Wow, I didn't think I could do it." He lets out an unnatural sounding laugh. "Holy shit."

  I pluck strands of hair out of my mouth, relieved to see that the tornadoes have vanished. "What's going on? Are we in dreamland? Are you real, or am I just dreaming you?"

  "You're still in dreamland. I just managed to get in here with you. This is the first time I've actually physically enter someone's thoughts before. Usually, I can only mentally control what they see." He squints at the sunlight filtering through the clouds. "The blue sky."

  I start to nod, but then pause. "Wait. You can control people's thoughts?"

  His intense gaze glides to mine. "How did you think I was controlling what you were seeing?"

  "I don't know. I guess I didn't really think about it." The idea that he can control thoughts is mind-boggling.

  He crosses his arms, staring me down. "Are you afraid of me now?"

  I shake my head. "No. It just seems so ... I don't know ... out there that you can do that. I didn't know that kind of stuff was possible."

  "It's not for most people," he says with a simple shrug. "I'm just different."

  "It's a really good thing that you are." I glance at a tree torn up from the roots. "Or else I think I might have ended up with all of my bones being broken."

  His expression softens as he looks around at the trees lying sideways, the branches scattered everywhere, and the large clumps of dirt now covering the land. "Yeah, what were those things?"

  "Tornadoes."

  "Tornadoes? What are those?"

  "When warm and cold air meet ..." I wave myself off. "Never mind. I don't know where I'm getting this stuff or if I'm even right. Information just keeps popping into my head."

  "Maybe there's a reason for that." He stares at me for a heartbeat longer before taking in the scenery. "I can see why you like this place. It has a ... calm way about it."

  "Yeah, I guess it does." I can't seem to take my eyes off him. He can control people's thoughts, kick holes through cars, climb down cliffs without ropes. What else can this guy do?

  "Allura, your staring is making me ... I don't know ... uneasy," he admits, fidgeting with a leather band on his wrist.

  I force my attention elsewhere. "I'm sorry. I was just thinking about stuff."

  "It's okay. It just ..." He cups the back of his neck, scuffing the tip of his boot against the dirt. "You kind of make me nervous sometimes."

  "Oh. Okay." Why do I make him nervous?

  "It's not bad. I'm just not used to ..." He grunts something under his breath then elevates his gaze from the ground, sweeping his hair back. "So what else is there to see around here?"

  I practically get whiplash from his abrupt subject change.

  "I don't know. I didn't really explore the area too much. Do we have time to?"

  He shrugs. "Probably. I mean, I don't know how long you'll be under, but we can walk around until you wake up."

  I nod then face the forest, preparing to endeavor into the trees. Then I hesitate.

  "What's wrong?" Blaise asks, stepping up beside me.

  "It's nothing. It's just that I've had a couple of memories of being in forests, and none of them are very good."

  "Like what?"

  I blow out a breath and tell him about the first memory I had of the man chasing me through the forest, a
bout the creature chasing me through the trees, and then about the men who shot me. I may not have technically been in the woods in that one, but I was headed there.

  "This makes no sense. You've had so many memories of the trees and this world," he says after I'm finished. "Yet this place"--he motions at the land--"doesn't exist in the world we live in."

  I bite on my thumbnail. "Maybe it does, but you just haven't seen it. The world is a big place, right?"

  "Yeah, but I've met a couple of travelers--Zaire's actually one of them--and they've never spoken of a place like this."

  "A traveler?"

  "The posts have a handful of them. They're the people who get sent out to find and trade food and supplies."

  I massage my arm where a tree branch nailed me. "Oh. I think the docks have them, too. Or, well, they have people who go and find food."

  His brows knit. "How do you know about the docks?"

  "Ryder told me about them when we were at the post." When his perplexity increases, I ask, "Did I get it wrong? Are there no travelers on the docks?"

  "No, there are ... Well, the people from the docks don't refer to them as travelers, but they're pretty much the same thing." He chews on his lip, sucking on the barbell. "It's just that Ryder usually doesn't talk about the docks with strangers."

  I feel a sting of hurt. I'm a stranger? I mean, I know the guys don't know me that well and vice versa, but I don't consider us strangers. Maybe I was wrong, though. I don't know much about what makes a stranger become a friend.

  "Shit, I didn't mean it like that," he hurriedly says, noting my hurt expression. "I just meant that Ryder doesn't talk about the docks a lot, so I'm just a little surprised he told you about it already. It usually takes him a while to trust someone before he opens up about that part of his life." He huffs out a frustrated breath, shaking his head at himself. "I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. Ryder is always telling me I suck at communicating."

  I stare at the spot in front of my feet at a tiny, yellow flower sprouting from the grass. "It's okay. I get it. You hardly know me." Tears pool in my eyes. I don't even know why I'm crying. I just suddenly feel so lost and alone in a big, scary, unfamiliar world.

  A slow breath eases from his lips. Then he threads his fingers through mine and pulls me to his side. I have a feeling the gesture means more than I can even comprehend.

  "I completely understand if you don't want to go into those trees." His fingers tremble, but he doesn't pull away. "But if you want to go exploring in there, I promise I won't let anything happen to you."