Freeing Carter

When Kira turns toward the stands, I realize for the first time what she's wearing. A basketball jersey with a number 1 on it. Coach Shaw in big letters on the back.

  I can't help it, I smile. Knowing when we go back out for the third quarter, I'm really going to kick some ass, even if it's only to do her jersey proud.

  ***

  "So, this is just a wild guess here, but I'm figuring, after seeing Kira's jersey, your goofy-ass smile, and the way you turned into super point guard in the second half, draining threes like old school Reggie Miller that: A) You and Kira have something going on and B) You're going out tonight, but not with me." Travis pulls a clean shirt over his head. "Not that I blame you. Actually, I'm little jealous, but that's beside the point." He smirks.

  "We're not together. I've just got a lot of stuff going on right now and...She’s cool."

  Travis looks at me funny for a second. "Yeah. I hear ya. Shit going on and all."

  "Huh?" I scratch my head. Then Travis does the same. Does he mean he has stuff going on too, or he knows I do? No, there's no way he can know. "What's up?"

  Travis laughs. "Nothing. You know...too many girls, not enough time and all. So...Kira?"

  I shrug. "I like hanging out with her." Actually, I like more than just hanging out with her and if I didn't feel like my life might self-combust at any second, I'd definitely want to be with her. Scratch that. I do want to be with her, I'm just not doing anything about it. I don't think.

  "Hooking up?"

  "Nope."

  "Damn." Travis laughs again.

  After shaking my head to get some of the extra water off, I say, "Still don't know what I'm doing tonight, though. Mom really might want me home." Translation, she might need me home. "I need to talk to her and Kira too."

  "Okay. Text me if you come out. A few guys are hanging out tonight, so I'll be with them. We're looking for a place to party." The urge to ask him about the partying climbs up my throat, but I shove it down, not wanting to look like the guy who's giving him shit when he's having fun after a break up. Travis doesn't give me time anyway, sliding his hat on backward and saying, "And, dude? You so want Kira. You should go for it. I'm pretty sure she's feelin' you too."

  I don't have time to think about what he said, because I'm still worried about going out there and talking to Mom. She showed up a little into the third quarter. Being a coward, I came straight to the locker room after our win, not ready to talk to her yet. Afraid of what I don't want to hear in her voice or see in her eyes.

  Now...now I have to face it.

  Before the locker room door has a chance to close behind me, two small, manicured hands slam into my chest, throwing me off balance. What the hell?

  "I can't believe you're going out with her, Carter. Did you even wait until we broke up? How do I know you weren't with her when we were still together?" If this was a cartoon, I can guarantee steam would be coming out of Mel's ears. She's still in her cheer uniform. A blue ribbon that matches our team colors ties up her hair and she has a scowl on her face. She's like Pissed off Cheerleader Barbie.

  It's apparent that the universe hates me. I can't seem to catch a break anywhere. "You're the one who was screwing around. Not me. And I'm not even with Kira." Unfortunately.

  She crosses her arms. "Funny you know exactly who I'm talking about! She's wearing a jersey with your name on it. Are you trying to embarrass me?" Mel's chin starts to quiver. No. No, no, no. I do not want to deal with a crying Melanie.

  But I have to get this over with. "I'm a little lost on how it would embarrass you when you're the one who I caught in the bushes with Devin and you happened to be the one who dumped me, but whatever." Before I say anything that might get me in trouble, I try to walk past her. She reaches out and grabs my arm, stopping me.

  Her voice is softer now and she moves closer. "I'm sorry, Carter. It's my fault. Devin's a jerk. You and I belong together. I want you back."

  Shock freezes me. Did I just hear what I thought I heard? Have Mel back? A part of my normal? But I don't want it. It's done. We're done. "Mel..."

  "Carter, I miss you. Your hairs still too messy, but I miss you." I actually think she does. Mel isn't a bad person, she's just spoiled. She wants it all. And regardless of how things went, we used to get along.

  "It wouldn't have worked out. You know that. We were starting to fight all the time. You started hanging out with another guy."

  "Devin was a mistake."

  "It'd be a mistake for us to get back together. You know that as well as I do."

  She reaches up and touches my hair. Even if part of me wants it to, the touch doesn't feel the same. She's not even looking at me the same. Mel doesn't want me back for me, she wants me back because she's starting to realize she can't have me.

  I start to pull away just as another voice comes from down the hall.

  "Carter! Carter! We won!" Sara, Mom, and Kira are standing by the door that leads to the gym. You've heard that saying time stopped? Yeah, I always thought it was dumb until now. It really feels like time stops. Like I'm doing something really bad and I just got caught and there's nothing I can do about it. Sara looks at Mel and then at me. "Ew. She's yucky."

  "Sara!" Mom gasps.

  Mel huffs. "Whatever."

  I finish pulling away from her.

  Kira is standing with my family. She crosses her arms and shakes her head. It's almost a mad gesture, but she doesn't look mad. Disappointed, maybe? Jealous?

  A woman stands behind her, touching Kira's shoulder. Comfort? Wishful thinking on my part? Probably.

  "I'm sorry, Mel, I gotta go." The words haven't finished leaving my mouth before I start jogging away. "Hey," I say to Kira when I get up to them. I look back to make sure Mel is gone, which she is.

  "Hey, Coach. Good game."

  For the first time in my life, I try to study a girl's voice besides my mom. Is there something hidden in there? Is she really telling me I had a good game or pretending she thinks that when really she's wishing I fell and busted my head open on the court.

  "Thanks..."

  The woman behind her reaches out her hand to me. "Hi. I'm Lana. I've heard so much about you."

  Those words, hearing that she's heard about me, make me feel better than winning the game did. "Carter. It's good to meet you." I'm talking to Lana, but looking at Kira. I'm pretty sure this ranks me up there with her on the crazy factor, but I'm looking for some sign that she's mad. Almost wanting her to be mad at seeing me with Mel, because that will mean Travis was right and she likes me.

  "Sorry I missed most of it. The store was crazy. Since Kira took my car, I rode out with Lana." Mom's voice is the only thing that pulls me away from Kira. It sounds right. Normal. Sober, but I need to look at her too. See her eyes, feel the way she hugs me. See if any hint of that tangy scent clings to her.

  "It's cool." I reach out and hug her, which I'm sure she thinks is strange. But it's her and she's sober so everything's okay. My lungs stop hurting when I let the air out of them. I hadn't even realized they hurt until they didn't.

  "Wow. That was nice." Mom smiles. "Sara's tired though. We're going to head home."

  My little sister's arms wrap around my waist and I squeeze her shoulders. "I like it when you win for me."

  "Always."

  "Be home by curfew." Mom winks and glances at Kira, throwing me off a bit. She's never winked at me like that. Sara pries her arms away. "Thanks for the ride, Lana. Are you guys leaving too?"

  The other woman nods and I feel like hyperventilating.

  "See ya later, Coach."

  There's no way I can let Kira walk away. On instinct, I reach out and grab her hand. "Wait... Let me take you home. I mean," I turn to Lana. "Can I take her home?"

  She laughs. She has dark skin too, but I don't think she has African American in her like I think Kira does. Lana looks like she
's Hawaiian. Kira a mix of black and something else. "You don't know her very well if you're asking me that question."

  My heart starts racing. I need Kira to say yes. I also need to talk to Mom. "Wanna go with me? I mean, ride with me. Hang out or something?" Wow...I'm smooth.

  She sighs, but it's not an annoyed kind of sigh. "I guess."

  I smile at her, but it's Lana who replies. "Curfew for you, too."

  Mom, Lana, and Sara start to walk out the door. Panic swells inside me. I need to catch Mom but away from Lana. "Wait! Mom. I..."

  When she looks at me, I see the hurt in her eyes. It beats down on me, burying me in guilt. She knows what I think. What I want to say. What I can't find a way to say in front of everyone else.

  "I know, Carter. I know. Sara and I will be okay. I'm thinking popcorn, hot chocolate, and a Barney marathon. How does that sound to you?" Her voice fakes the lightness that doesn't reach her eyes.

  "Perfect," I reply, even though she wasn't talking to me.

  Chapter Twelve

  Just like when I brought her home the other night, my truck is quiet. It's a little after nine so we have a couple hours before either of us has to be home. I have no idea where we're going, so I'm just driving around, trying to figure out where to take her since I practically begged her to come with me. That's not the only thing I'm trying to figure out. I'm not sure what to say, either. I sort of want to talk to her about Mel. Let her know that if it looked like we were up to something, we definitely weren't. Mel was, but not me. But that makes it look like I think she cares, when I don't know if she does or not.

  Will it make me look like a conceited jackass if I bring it up?

  But if I don't, am I the jerk who kisses her and then has my ex's hands in my hair a week later?

  I'm really not too thrilled to be either of those guys.

  "Music?" I ask, reaching for the CD player, but she pushes my hand down and shakes her head.

  "Nope. I like silence sometimes."

  Oh-kay. There went that try. Next option—basketball. "So...you practiced anymore since the other night?"

  "Let's do something crazy!" She says in reply, turning in her seat to face me.

  "Huh?" I totally just missed something.

  "You need to relax. I can see it. You're too tense. Let's do something fun! Let's be wild!"

  This is what I love about spending time with this girl. She never says or does what I expect. It's so different being with her than anyone else, because even though I have no clue what she means by 'something wild,' I want to do it. With her. Actually, I'm pretty sure I need to.

  "Okay. Like what?"

  "I don't know. Let me think." She looks around, out the windows like something is going to jump right out at her. I have no doubt it will. Any time I can spare having my eyes off the road, they're on her. Taking in her hair. Seeing her in a jersey with my name. Wishing I could touch her the way the shirt does.

  "Oh! Right there!" She points off to the side of the road. "Pull over."

  I look, but all I see is a small senior apartment complex. "Where?"

  "Coach!" She grabs the wheel like she's going to pull off the road for me. I slow down more, batting her hands away and pulling in.

  "Okay, okay. I'm going. Don't make us wreck."

  The place is totally dark, I'm assuming because old people live here, and they go to bed early, right? There are a couple big, brown buildings that I'm assuming are packed with...well, senior citizens. "I give up. Why are we here?"

  "Do you have a pencil or a pen in here? Oh, and what do you have in your bag for clothes?" Kira opens my glove-box and pulls out a pen. I can't help but stare while she pulls her hair up. Does some crazy, twisty, turny, girl thing and suddenly her hair is held up in a ponytail with a pen. I'm man enough to admit I want to ask how she did it, but I don't.

  "Clothes? Um, I have a pair of basketball shorts and t-shirt that I use for practice. There's also shorts in the cab that I keep there just in case." She looks at me funny and I shrug. "Never know when I might want to stop somewhere and play ball."

  She smiles widely, and for the first time, I notice a slight gap between her two front teeth. Nothing big, obviously since it took me this long to notice it, but for some reason, it's so her. "Grab the clothes and be quiet. It's time for a little breaking and entering."

  ***

  Yeah, definitely not what I expected her to say. I'm jumping out of my truck and behind her in about two seconds flat. "What? Where are we breaking and entering? Grandma's house?"

  "Shh." She slips her arm through mine, hugging herself close to me as we walk. I can't believe it, but it almost makes me stumble. That little touch sends all sorts of firecrackers exploding through my body. I like touching her. I want to touch more of her. "Let's not announce to everyone we're here. Do you like hot tubs?" Kira whispers.

  "Yeah, who doesn't?"

  "Well, most of the time apartments have them. The gates usually close at night, but I bet we can sneak in and we'll have the whole thing to ourselves. You in?"

  Hot tub. Gorgeous girl. Totally don't have to ask me twice. It's worth a B&E charge. "I'm in."

  We sneak through the complex, on the hunt for the pool and Jacuzzi. Kira is still holding onto me as we follow the twists and turns of the sidewalk. When someone starts to open a door, I pull her with me, ducking behind a huge bush. She stumbles, her feet tying up in mine, and falls against me as I hit the side of the building.

  "Come on, George. I'm not getting any younger!" a woman's voice says from around the corner.

  "I'm coming. I'm coming. Keep your teeth in," a guy replies.

  A laugh tries to jump out of my mouth, but then Kira's hand is covering it, her face buried in my chest as she laughs against me. When the old couple disappears and her shoulders stop shaking, Kira pulls away from my chest and looks up at me. We're close. Almost as close as we were that night at the court. Or maybe closer. I don't know. All I know is she's all I feel or know or smell. The explosions start going off in me again and there's a stirring of some action below the belt.

  I take in her cheekbones of all things. They're high and cut like a model's. Not that I've ever noticed cheekbones before or knew they could be so perfect, but they are. I'm not sure if I'll ever look at a girl's cheekbones the same again. I have to bite my lip not to lean down and kiss her. God, I want to kiss her so bad, I'm dizzy, but instead I open my mouth and say, "I wasn't thinking of Mel. When we kissed, I mean. I was thinking of you. I wanted to kiss you."

  The Ladies Man of the Year award is so not going to me because she has me all upside down and backward, but I can't find it in me to care.

  "That's good to know, Coach." Her breath is warm against my face. Warm and minty and even though I've never been a mint person, I'm totally craving it right now.

  "And earlier? She told me she wanted me back, but I don't want her. Just so you know."

  This earns me another one of her smiles. "Good. Now come on, let's go."

  This time I don't let her get away without being the one to grab her hand. As though she's been here before, she weaves her way through the place again, pulling me along. I'm worried she might have been wrong and there's not going to be a Jacuzzi here when we finally see a fence up ahead and to the left.

  Okay, so I know I thought earlier that I had the worst luck, but now I'm thinking the opposite. It's totally secluded, with tall bushes around most of the fence and pretty far into the complex. Now, if we can just get in the gate, I just might start to think I'm the luckiest guy in the world.

  "Over here," I tell her as I head toward the far back of the fence. It's brick back here. "Can you step in my hand and climb up if I lift you?"

  "Absolutely. But what about you?"

  "Don't worry. Nothing is keeping me on this side of that wall."

  There's a lamp on the other side, but
it gives me enough light to see her. Kira laughs and shakes her head, but I think for the first time, I see a hit of red in her light brown skin. Linking my hands together, I hold them out. Kira steps in, grabs the top of the wall, and pulls herself up. The ledge is wide enough that she's sitting on it.

  "We totally scored. There's a table on this side."

  "Nice." I hand her the bags. Then I jump, grabbing the ledge of the wall and hoping like hell I'm strong enough to pull myself up. How lame would I look if I couldn't do it?

  But I can. I pull until I can throw my leg up on the ledge and straddle the wall like she is. "Let me get down first and I'll help you." Jumping down to the table, I hold my arms out for her and she lowers herself into them before standing on the table with me.

  I almost go for it right there, not able to hold myself back from touching my lips to hers, but she leaps to the ground before I get the chance. She pulls her shoes off, then her socks. "Can I wear the shirt and shorts from your bag?"

  "No," leaps out of my mouth, but then I hand the bag to her. "I want it on record that I think skinny dipping is a much better idea."

  "I'm sure no one would doubt that, Coach, but who knows what the old people do in that water."

  Good point.

  Kira holds up her hand and draws a circle in the air with her finger. "Turn around."

  This girl is going to be the death of me, but I turn around so she can change. Her jersey hits the table, then a shirt. Kira is in her bra behind me. Let me repeat that, Kira is in her bra behind me and there's nothing in the world I want more than to turn around to see her. I hear more shuffling of clothes before her pants are on the table, too.

  "You can turn around now."

  Yeah. Now that the show's over. She's already lowering a foot into the water when I take off my shirt. She has to hold my shorts up so they don't fall off her. The t-shirt drowns her, but I'm pretty sure she's still the hottest girl I've ever seen.

  And I totally need to get my head together.

  My pants come next and I pull on the other pair of shorts I had in my bag. "Care if I turn on the jets and stuff?" I ask her. She shakes her head. I open the little box on the wall and turn them on. It's kind of loud, and I hope nobody will come out to check. A few seconds later, I lower myself into the water with her.