Pain's Joke

Chapter 9

  Sandy was waiting on the porch for Dolores the next morning.

  “Well?” she asked nervously.

  Dolores thought for a moment about how to word it while she sat down on the porch next to Sandy. The best she came up with was a reluctant “Yes.”

  “Oh my God, Dory! Did you tell your folks? Who was it? Is he cute? What was it like? Is it like in the movies all romantic and stuff? C'mon, give me details, girlfriend.”

  “No, it was nothing like that,” she began the story she concocted to hide her shame. “It was this guy from that youth group in Marietta I told you about. Our church and his church met up for a gathering and we sneaked off and did it.”

  Sandy gasped, “In the church?!”

  Dolores didn't think of that. “No, in his car.”

  “He has a car? What's his name? So is he cute, when do I get to meet him?”

  “Sandy, stop. You don't get to meet him. It was a one-time thing, and I'm probably never going to see him again. It's not a big deal, I'm just gonna have to deal with it, that's all. I'm pregnant and I'm just gonna have to deal with it.”

  Sandy leaned toward her and hugged her. “Well if you need anything, just call. You know I'm here for you.”

  “Thanks. Now I just have to figure out how to tell my parents. They're already fighting about all that money they lost. This is just great.”

  “You want me to come with? I can help you tell 'em if that's what you're thinking.”

  “No, I don't know. God, I don't know. What am I gonna do? I mean, I've never even changed a diaper!”

  “You're a woman, Dory, it'll come naturally. We're more caring and stuff. But, Wow! Oh my God! I can't believe it. That's kinda cool, in a weird way.”

  “Not cool, Sandy. Not cool at all. I'm gonna get all fat, and the stretchmarks...” Dolores started crying again. “And my parents are gonna KILL me! Seriously, I can't even begin to think of how they're gonna punish me for this. Remember when I broke that window? They grounded me for weeks, they're gonna flip, I just know it.”

  “I'm sure it's pretty scary. I didn't mean cool, but seriously though, you have another human being growing inside of you. THAT is pretty damn cool.”

  “Yeah,” she sniffed and managed a smile as she put her hand on her belly.

  “So have you thought of any names?”

  “You're, like, a million miles ahead of me here, Sandy. Let me get used to the idea of being pregnant first. Then let me figure out how to tell my folks. Then maybe we can figure out names. Besides, I don't even know if it's gonna be a boy or a girl yet.”

  “Well, anyway, I hope it's a girl.”

  “I just hope it's healthy.” Then she gasped, “Oh God, Sandy, what if it's born with fins instead of hands? I saw a kid on TV like that.”

  “I'm sure it'll be healthy,” said Sandy reassuringly. “It's got a good momma.”