The Net 7.0
realization of Anne.
- No, I think not. Who are you? Why have you come visit me?
- You do not remember ever having seen me, my face or anything, anything from me?
- I'm sorry. By the way you talk it seems that I should remember.
The eyes of Anne fell to the ground, reflecting a major conflict that has befallen her. Ubi, who was watching over the Internet, like a ghost, worried and struggled to figure out what could be wrong with the memory of Hugh. It would be very bad if Hugh could not remember a great love of his life, after all this is something that humans should remember, this is just something that settles deep in the memory. There could be a part of memory allotted to hold love? This was not entirely disposable after the brain had been seen as an organ that liked to specialize. After all, what had been doing humans all these centuries? Indeed they were learning to love, and that there could be a memory of love, what a great revelation to the romantics. Anne raised her eyes and there was disappointment in them.
- Do not remember me or have seen me before? Maybe looked for me?
Hugh did not know what to say, seemed upset.
- I don't know who you are, but I wonder.
Anne burst into tears and ran out of that room impulsively. Hugh watched the scene with undisguised disbelief. He started to reflect, trying to remember, he thought that perhaps he had already seen this girl before, but this idea was so fragile that he could not convince himself.
“...
> ROSEBUD
Is it worth continuing to live when you no longer have the love of your life? What's left to live for? What's left of you?
> JULIET
You're over reacting. Love is just one more thing in life. Life is also eating chocolate. Eating chocolate and forget.
> ROSEBUD
One of a kind like you telling me this! I think not worth living when you've lost the most precious in life.
> JULIET
Losing your life? But life is a continuing, and if you continue to live, always finds something, always forget something, always trumps something, everything goes, nothing, nothing stays.
> ROSEBUD
I do not want to live without my love. I will not live without my love. I died.
> JULIET
This is not right, if you feel like that, it's because you want to live more intensely than others, more than the possible, you are not a victim of life, a poor girl, you're a greedy self-centered, right? After all who does not want to live a great love, it would be a wonderful life, a life forever desired, but almost nobody gets it. Nothing to be megalomaniac here, okay, to find yourself better than others. Look at yourself and stop whining.
...”
//club_of_the_trick/friends/room184/
Ubi had to push hard for Anne to come to his house that night. Finally she ended up agreeing. They were tired and upset. A heavy atmosphere was in the air between the two.
- I do not know what happened, Anne, I have no explanation. I did several tests with Hugh, it seemed that his memory was good. He can remember things that I thought did not even remember, like when I showed a picture of Uncle Francis, I did not expect that he could recognize such uncle. I do not know what happened. But I'm sorry for you, I like you. I know that is not much consolation, but I would have liked to see you and Hugh together. I think that would make him a happy man. What has always encouraged me in this life was the love of Dora. Dora has always been the reason for me to go forward, and then face everything in life. Nothing is as important as finding love, then everything is complete. I think I'm a romantic fool. I think most of people do not care anymore for it, much less you young people, is not it?
Anne was limited to looking at emptiness. Ubi sighed with displeasure.
- What can we do? I think if you talk a little more with him, if you told things that you have lived together, it may reactivate his memory, it is possible. I do not understand how he did not recognize you.
- Maybe... Maybe because he had not seen me.
Ubi took that phrase as a joke, but paying attention at the words of Anne he had to reconsider.
- Excuse me? I did not understand what you said.
- Hugh did not recognize me, because he never looked at me, because he did not see me... not see me. - Said Anne thoughtfully and upset.
- I still do not understand how can he not have seen you? How could it be?
- I... I thought he had seen me, I thought he looked at me. But I was wrong. Today I know he did not look at me, not myself. I looked at him. It's my fault. I think I fell for him so that I began to dream of a life with him, I think I started to fantasize that he corresponded, that he saw me, but he didn't. Whenever he passed me I looked him, discreet, embarrassed, but I loved him so much. I didn't see the other boys around him, I could see him, but he did not see me. What a fool I was. I'm ashamed. He is so handsome, so different, he was everything to me. And he didn't see me all this time, I was transparent. Am I transparent? Breathing the same air that him, be where he was, to see him smiling with his friends, the way he wore his shirt, his distant voice, the stories he told and I could hear pieces. And he did not see me. I'm stupid and a fool.
- So that's it! That's why he didn't recognize you. You never spoke to him!
- No. I tried but I didn't do. I never told to anyone. My friend Sandy may have suspected, I think. How silly.
Ubi could no longer restrain his laughter and laughed softly.
- Sorry Anne, you're not silly, you are perfectly normal. Most of us go through it. The great forbidden love, unshared love, unrequited, that's part of life.
Ubi continued with a smile now with tenderness for Anne. He admired her as ever. Her passion, her daring, all she had done for that passion, all this was admirable. Ubi was aware of how hard it should have been for Anne, after she fell in love with a body that could only look, not lived with Hugh about to see something beyond the exterior of Hugh, and due to transplant, Hugh lost just the body, what's left for she still loves him, perhaps, her illusion. The desire to live that passion, could it be this desire that made her strong as she can pass through Hugh and reach the interior of him? The passion itself resolved the dilemma.
- Well, there is only one thing that looks right to do at this point Anne. It's take a chance for you and Hugh. No, don't give me that face. Somehow you have not been fair to my son, Hugh did not have a chance to meet you, and you should have given him that chance, even if it were to go wrong, but it's not fair to him otherwise, is it?
- But he never looked at me.
- Yeah, but you would not know what will happen when he really look at you?
- I'm afraid.
- And who would not be? Leave it to me.
Next day Ubi was talking to Hugh.
- How are you son?
After a while Hugh replies:
- Should I respond as a patient?
Ubi reflects.
- No, of course not. This was not the direction I intended, Sorry.
- Excuse for what? It is not necessary. Because I would like to understand if you asked to know how I really feel, or just to wonder whether my body is well? This... body.
There was a difference in the pronunciation of that last word that came to have multiple meanings for Ubi. Ubi's eyes fled to the eyes of Hugh. The father approached the son, they were face to face.
- Sorry son, how do you feel?
Ubi tried to sustain a look at Hugh, but Hugh looked so hard at Ubi that even reluctantly Ubi looked at side.
- Father, who am I?
Ubi returned to try to look at Hugh and reflected deeply before speaking, as if he played chess.
- You are my son.
Hugh seemed to smile. But his eyes showed a bit of despair.
- I am Hugh. I am his son Hugh. Can you see that? Can you feel this?
Ubi squeezed his lips, still trying to keep her expression of strength, but revealed weakness.
- Sure son. You're my son Hugh. And I love you so much.
-
Father remember that we were always together, you and me and mother, remembers how happy we were, remember that you always held me in the morning, remember? Things have changed isn't it?
Ubi realized that he really had been kept away from Hugh, really seemed to be something that prevented him from touch at Hugh, the knowledge that be touching the body of another one, to touch a different being. This again. Ubi closed his eyes and pulled Hugh for a strong embrace. Hugo was trembling and his eyes closed too. The father rubbed his son's back, patting his neck, and then he moved away so they looked each other in the eyes.
- We will not stay that way, son. This is not easy for us, never will be. We have to move on, re-learning. Our lives have changed completely, our old life is gone forever.
- And what is this life that exists for me now? I could no longer look in the mirror. I try not to look at my hands, neither for my body. I have taken shower with closed eyes. I don’t like even to pee. How funny is that?
- It will pass, you will see, you will overcome. Important is to be alive. That's what matters.
- Sure, you're right dad. You are right. But it's so strange when I look, it seems that I'm watching a movie, seeing a camera. When I smell something, or when I touch something, it seems so weird like it was packed, when I eat or when I hear something, it's like having a great fever on me, it seems that's not me, it seems a virtual experience, it seems that any time I turn off everything and come back to reality, to another way of feeling. I had horrible nightmares, I'll decreasing, I'm buried alive, I'm falling endlessly. Does it all go away?
- Yes it will, soon, you should start with therapy sessions, this will