Abducted to Oz

  CHAPTER ELEVEN:

  THE WINKIE COUNTRY

  Oz was as unlike America as it could be, yet also familiar. It was notvery long at all before Graham began to feel almost at home among thesoft yellow countryside of the vast Winkie territory in which the pairnow found themselves. In fact, Graham had come to feel so comfortablethat he had all but forgotten about the evil Witch. He might haveremained content and carefree indefinitely, had he not heard the growlthat came forth from a nearby top-hat bush. It was a most deafeninggrowl that sounded as terrible as a buzz-saw and as alive as an unfedzoo animal. Graham shuddered. He wondered what sort of macabre beingcould possibly make such a horrendous noise. Then a voice rang out. Itwas not a human voice at all, and this made Graham shudder even more,whereas Telly seemed quite unfazed. (That was only because he waswalking and napping at the same time.) Apparently he had switched toautomatic pilot, then closed his eyes as he drifted into a state ofoblivion.

  "Do you remember how the Wicked Witches sent the terrible Forest Monsterafter the Wizard?" said the voice.

  "Of course I do," answered a second voice, equally unhuman-sounding "Andwho could forget the time Allidap sent forth those fearsome gray wolvesafter little Dorothy? They could easily have ripped her to shreds."

  Both of the voices sounded distinctly throaty and animalistic. In fact,they sounded as a wild beast might sound, could a wild beast speakEnglish. It occurred to Graham that this was Oz. Wild animals COULDspeak English!

  "And do you think that Witch pulled a good scare when she sent thoseangry birds to attack Dorothy and her friends?" said one of the wildcreatures.

  Graham could take no more of this. It was obvious that they weresurrounded by hidden animals sent by the Wicked Witch to eat them (atleast him; he doubted they would attempt to eat Telly, since he would behighly indigestible). He quickly jabbed Telly in his rib-cage to awakenhim to the imminent danger and, at the same time, he stooped over tograb a yellow rock from the ground. It was not much of a weapon, but itwould have to do. He held up the rock threateningly.

  "Okay, wolves or monsters or whatever you are!" he shouted. "I hear youconspiring. And I know that you are working for the Wicked Witch! We'renot going to give up without a fight, so I suggest that you all goaway!" He smiled with a hint of pride in his brave speech. But suddenly,there was a rustle of leaves behind him, and a huge creature sprang outfrom behind a bush and leaped at the pair. Graham, not wanting to beattacked from behind, swung himself around to face the creature. As hedid so, he absently lowered his weapon at the sight of two rows ofgleaming white fangs and claws that could easily have torn a little boylike himself apart in an instant. He realized that the rock in his handwas a puny weapon indeed for confronting such a ferocious beast. Butnevertheless, he raised it again as a sort of reflex action and thrustit directly at the teeth of the creature. At that moment, out of thecorner of his eyes, he caught a glimpse of another set of jagged teethand claws attacking from his right. It raised a huge paw and knocked himoff balance. The rock fell to the ground, out of reach. The little boywatched in horror as one of the two animals stepped forward and lookedat his face. The other one was watching Telly.

  "What do you think?" asked one of them.

  "Looks like a little boy and a tin can with arms and legs carrying a TVset," said the other.

  "The boy's not all dressed in yellow, so he's not a Winkie."

  "Nor is he all in blue, like a Munchkin."

  "Or purple, red, or green. He matches none of the Oz colors. I wonderwhere he came from."

  "Maybe he's from Ev. Or Ix."

  "Can you speak, boy?"

  Graham struggled to sit up, while Telly just stood and glaredat the beasts. He was not happy with their description of him and wasseriously considering giving them a tongue-lashing, but thoughtdiscretion was the better part of valor, at least for the moment.

  When Graham was able to collect himself, he discovered that the twobeasts walked on all fours and were of the feline persuasion. These wereno hungry wolves or monsters at all. Actually, they were a lion and atiger.

  As Graham jumped to his feet, the lion sprang backward. "Yikes!" hescreamed, jumping behind the tiger. "Is he g-going to h-hurt us?"

  "I don't think so," answered the tiger. "I imagine he's just getting upto look for some din-din." At this point, as if on cue, a loud growlechoed from the vicinity of the tiger. Not from his mouth or throat, butfrom the deepest recesses of his tummy.

  Graham looked at Telly, and Telly looked at Graham.

  "Apparently," said Graham, "the angry growling that we heard was nothingmore than the sounds of an empty stomach. So you aren't slaves of thebad Witch, or sent to kill me?"

  The tiger looked a little sheepish, which is not easy for a tiger to do.

  "Of course not," he said. "Don't you know who I am? I am the HungryTiger of Oz. Everyone's heard of me. There have been volumes of bookswritten about me! I am always hungry, but I am not a carnivore. I amafraid I would feel just awful if ever I ate up one of my fellow beings.Here in the Land of Oz, as you know, all creatures are treated equally.I can't stand the thought of eating up any organism that mightultimately become a friend. This makes me feel bad, too. I am reduced toa strictly vegetarian diet. I yearn to gobble up a few scrumptiouslydelicious fat babies, yet I am reduced to struggling through meals oftofu-strips and Loveburger. Oh, if only my conscience would let me feastupon a fat baby just once! But, alas, I am cursed with a very strongconscience."

  "Then I am not afraid of you," said Graham. "What about this lion?"

  "He is the Cowardly Lion of Oz," explained the Hungry Tiger. "He's gota pretty good conscience, too."

  "Then why did he attack me like that?" Graham wanted to know.

  "I didn't attack you," replied the Cowardly Lion. "I heard you say thatthere were some wolves or monsters or something-or-others who wereworking for the Wicked Witch. You announced that you were going to fightthem, so I naturally jumped behind you to cower in fear."

  "Oh," said Graham. "I misunderstood your actions."

  "So," continued the Lion, "are there really slaves of the W-w-w-witcharound here?"

  "I heard them talking about how a Witch sent a forest monster and somewolves to attack innocent people," said Graham. "But ..."

  "That was us," explained the Tiger. "We like to talk about Oz history alot. We were in the bushes looking for some yummy kiwi fruits to helpsatisfy my never-ending hunger when you came along."

  "So the Witch isn't after me after all?"

  "Guess not," replied the Tiger. "Should she be?"

  "Well," he said meekly. "I played a couple of rather crude tricks onher. I suspect that she'll be pretty peeved when she does find me. Ileft her admiring herself in a ... well, a kind of self-induced trance.It's kind of hard to explain. But when she finds a mirror ... well, Idread to think what will happen."

  The Lion and the Tiger looked at one another. The Lion stood to his fullheight, which was actually somewhat larger than most of the lions we cansee in zoos, and smiled a toothy smile. "I'll protect you, my son!" hesnarled. And how he could snarl and smile at the same time was beyondGraham, but let it suffice that he did do it. "No Wicked Witch will get'hold of any pals of mine! I'm a raging lion, after all! I am big! I amstrong! I'm the unchallenged King of the Beasts! I am the--" He dovebehind a bush when the Tiger tapped him on the shoulder.

  "Er, excuse me," said the Tiger, "but I only wanted to get yourattention."

  "Sorry," the Lion said meekly, slinking back into the open.

  "I think we should learn about our new chum," suggested the HungryTiger. "After all, now that you've vowed to protect him, aren't you justa little bit curious as to who he is?"

  Graham, seeing that he was expected to introduce himself, told the twocats who he was and how he came to be in Oz, how he had tricked theWitch, and how he met Telly, and how they had conspired together totrick her again, et cetera, et cetera.

  The Cowardly Lion shuddered. The Hungry Tiger swallowed hard (an actthat
normally comes quite easily to him). Even Graham became a littlenervous as he recounted his dealings with the Witch and was remindedthat he was in imminent danger. "If you two would care to accompany us,you are certainly very welcome," Graham said to the Lion and Tiger.

  "Well, I don't know about that," replied the Lion. "At the moment, theold Witch isn't bothering us. And if she sees us with you two, she mightdecide that birds of a feather flock together, if you know what I mean."

  "Oh, don't be such a coward," admonished the Tiger. "She'll see rightaway that we're not birds."

  At that, everyone laughed as the four headed off into the sunset.